Spending time with parents, absolutely
Posted By: SallySue on 2009-05-11
In Reply to: Out of curiosity, all of you who posted that - sm
Mother and daddy divorced but my brother and I spent summer vacations, Christmas, visited daddy, traveled with him and his wife. Tried keeping my children and now my grandchildren close with my mother and daddy (their grandparents and great-grandparents). My son spent summers with both grandparents when he was young but as he aged, they did not seem to be that important in his life. I always, always visited my parents, my grandmother (only one I ever knew out of the 4, others deceased), my aunts, and on and on. I was never asked to stay close, that was just me and I loved it.
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Yeah, my bro. said what you said - not spending a lot of time in sm
condo except to sleep, etc. Both places have nice kitchens, though. I don't know. I usually spend the most time in the condo. We will be there 8 days. Thanks for your input..Still torn though! haha
How much time do you plan on spending in condo?
If it is just a place to sleep and shower while you do the tourist thing, I would go with the cheaper place. But if your plan is to spend time with family talking, hanging out, I would go to condo and relax on beach. The men can go golf while you relax on beach even. If there is a kitchen in the condo and not in the other place, you will save money on food, and it is always fun to hang in a kitchen, cook together, have a few drinks and a few laughs.
Absolutely call the parents of this kid.
It doesn't have to turn in to anything ugly (unless the parent lets it get that way) but I would want to be aware if my child did something like this.
absolutely classless! you make the time to
Do they spend time with your parents
and willingly or just how is time split up between the g'parents?
My parents have time shares (4) and they pay
an annual maintenance fee on each one, plus transfer fees if they decide to go somewhere other than where they own. That is an upfront normal fee on every timeshare that I have looked at.
Parents might prefer "alone" time to rest after the
x
Absolutely, but I shake myself out of it quickly to make it a happy time for my kids and hubby. nm
x
We have been spending less than 100
And we are starving. DH took over going to the grocery store from me (He thought I spent too much when I would spend about 150 a week.) It has been months since we do not have a bare cupboard. I am not complaining. I understand we are broke and he needs to pay the creditors. But the one person who has pretty much stopped eating is me. I am home all day and there is never bread to make a sandwich and I often pass up supper because I am tired of eating junky stuff like mac and cheese or spaghetti with meat sauce. He and our 11 year old son, on the other hand eat thirds of whatever meal it is. I get kind of annoyed. Our littlest boy and middle girl eat very little. All 3 take their lunch to school. I say to DH either stop eating so much (for him and the older boy) or buy more. He flips his eyes at me. We even stopped getting microwave popcorn which used to fill them up. So, now I am hoping to work extra to go to the grocery store myself and put an extra 100 a week in myself, but I keep running out of work.
You see, this all started when we started running out of work in transcription about a year ago this fall, and my DH took over the bills. Apparently food was the first to be cut. And, BTW I don't ever go anywhere because there is no gas in my car, and it has 2 flat tires. We live by the school and I borrow DH's car to take the kids but it is always on empty. We seem to make it every time. Oh, well. No need to complain. Just cutting back. The family is lucky I work at home, don't use gas, barely eat. But I do have to pay 10 bucks a month for nerve pills, because it is hard doing without. Like I said, when work picks up transcribing first place I am going after I get gas for the car is to the food store. Eventually I can repair my flat tires.
For those of you spending $1000+
What sorts of things are you buying? I don't think I spend nearly that amount, but my children and family still receive what they want, even my teenager. I can't imagine spending so much money at one time on gifts, so I'm curious what it is that's costing y'all so much. :)
Let him - for the money you/he is spending in gas sm
you can probably get one of those weekly hotels and at least break even. he needs to tell them up front what he is doing and get a good discount, most will give them if long-term situations. he will get a lot more rest and be a much happier person and easier to live with in the long run. driving wears me out more than anything and i feel for him with that commute! maybe he could even get his job to split the cost with him.
Lunch spending
My husband usually brings leftovers for lunch. I give my daughter $20 for lunch at school (to put in her lunch account), and that usually lasts a week. My other daughter is home by lunchtime and she eats what we have here at home. We spend about $100 a week on groceries. On the weekends we usually go out at least once, maybe twice for lunch and spend anywhere from $15-$25 depending on where we go. My oldest is a vegetarian so we actually save money because if we get takeout, she usually doesn't find anything that she wants to eat. When I was working outside the home I spent way to much on lunch every day, usually about $50 a week.
How is it your money she is spending?
President Obama and his wife have their own incomes from royalties, etc., from his book deals, investments of their previous earnings, and also he receives a paycheck for being President just as you do for being an MT.
I don't think that eTransPlus thinks they can tell me what to buy with my paycheck because they send it to me. Once I accepted a job and do my job, it is none of their business what my check is spent on.
If you can't reconcile your views on $, spending sm
and happiness (i.e, that both of you deserve to be heard and to be happy), you are rapidly heading for divorce court. Go read some Suze Orman financial advice for women, for a start, and then get some counseling. He is obviously irresponsible with money and you are not. How old are you two, out of curiosity?
How I am spending my money, ah, vacation
I am getting the FULL retirement because reached the 66 year mark. I had to wait an extra year, used to be 65 but with my year of birth had to wait until 66. No slowing down on the MTing, plan to work the same 4 days as doing now. I sure am planning on doing something special, well first 2 checks and then some because of the cost, escorted travel club, planning on paying towards 3 different vacations, one of them being the Rockies and Canada for 9 days. Excited broad here.
Well, I have not changed my spending habits.
I changed my spending habits based on my own personal situation, not the fact that my neighbor has lost his job and now can't spend like that anymore.
One of our problems is that the people with all the money do not spend in proportion to their income as us poorer folks do. They save it and save it and grow more money from it and their money is not being put back into the economy.
I for one have no problem with a millionaire spending $500 for a pair of shoes or whatever else they want to spend their money on.
Didn't plan it, but seems I am spending mine with a SM
terrible head cold. UGH!
Not broke but have changed spending habits.
I did reel in some spending a bit and changed a few things in the budget.
Have no intention of going broke.
Don't smoke either. LOL Couldn't afford to with the new taxes on those things!
I feel your pain too, but not spending my money is not going to help you - nm
x
Cutting back on Christmas spending this year
I thought it might be a good idea to post ideas for gifts that are inexpensive. I have made a few Christmas gifts in years past, but, since I've already given these particular gifts and my family members already "have one", I need new ideas!
I will start with the ideas of gifts I have given in the past:
I made family wreaths for each of my kids (grown). What I did was, buy a nice size wreath at the craft store, purchase inexpensive small frames at the dollar store (or wherever I could find them), made copies of baby pictures of my kids when they were little, family picture, pics of the grandbabies, etc. and framed each one - wired each framed photo onto the wreath, put in some berry sprays or whatever, and a 20 count string of white lights and some ribbon. Then I sprayed them with spray glue and sprinkled with the white snow stuff. Also, I put a few blank frames with Christmas card fronts so that they could add pics from the inlaws (who I did not have pics as children) and new baby pics as appropriate.
They were darling! My daughter in law actually cried when I gave them their wreath!
I also made a similar thing for my mom - I made her a Grandchildren tree - because she has too many grandchildren to get all their pics on a wreath. I just purchased a small, prelit tree from Wal - Mart, and basically, did the same thing - framed pics of all the grandchildren and children, glued ribbon to the back of the frames - hung them like ornaments, added some ribbon and some berry sprays. It was beautiful and she has used it every year since, because it is small and she can put it together herself - without much work.
I will post more ideas in a little bit, but, I need other ideas from all of you - because, how many memory or family wreaths can you give . . .
Make a list of budget/spending priorities for your self employment income
Dave Ramsey's book has a irregular income planning sheet. Basically you list your expenses with the cash flow sheet. With any steady income you allocate it. For irregular income, make a list from the cash flow sheet of what needs to be paid first. Keep a culmulative total.
Spending a romantic weekend in Atlanta with hubby. Leaving at noon. Can't wait! nm
,
No! That sounds too desperate. TIME. Just give it TIME. If it is real, then sm
something will definitely evolve. If you like him, flirt back! Don't act desperate because if he DOES like you, then the suspense will just make him want to get to know you more. Trust me on this.
I worked in the medical records department of a hospital when I was single and dated a few co-workers in my early 30s. It was fun. Nothing serious came about any of the relationships.
This sounds like fun - the beginning of maybe something to come....Keep us informed.
Totally agree, get these from time to time since teens...sm
It's a neuro condition, it does not mean there is anything at all wrong with you, it is actually related to narcolepsy, hypnagogic (sp? I just got up!) hallucinations, etc. And I HATE when I get these, it is always freaky, my siblings get this too, at times. I can "go away" for years and years before you get another episodes, so don't worry! I heard that when you are under a lot of stress or are very busy with things that this happens more??? Take care!!
It's time to stop when you or the kid(s) feel it is time, and no sooner. sm
My grandmother (who passed away at the young age of 107 back in the mid 1990s) was STILL celebrating every little holiday for all of her many kids and grandkids, and she would STILL give me a chocolate bunny every Easter, as she had since I was a toddler and even though I was 40ish at the time (and I still delighted in biting its head off in front of her, as I had also done since I was a toddler, which always met with mock disapproval from her).
Don't let anyone dampen your joy in celebrating your traditions.
ABSOLUTELY . . .
If children find out on their own, they think they have figured out the great mystery of life, if someone tells them (especially an adult), they are taking away a precious, magical childhood time. My daughter believed up until she was 11 . . . and now that she and my almost 11-year-old son have figured it out, they think THEY have uncovered a great mystery!!! They think it's funny, actually. My 7-year-old still believes and he will until he is at least 10, if I have anything to say about it. That's like talking to them about faith in my opinion. That's the parents' responsibility
Absolutely..
My stepmother had a TAH almost 20 years ago and has had hot flashes ever since then. Sorry, that's probably bad news!
Absolutely don't do it
Same story here. Sit through sales pitch, very very hard sell, push push push. Then, instead of the "jeweled timepiece" which was the LEAST expensive prize, I got a cheap Timex that didn't even run.
Run run run away from this!!!!!
absolutely I would have said something
What if these kids are in his care a lot?
What if he does this behind closed doors (very likely if he struck out at the little one in public) when mommy isn't around?
What if he isn't their dad (or is) and he's abusing them but she doesn't know it?
As a mom, I would definitely want to know if someone struck my kid. Especially if I was a single mom (which I have been) and this guy was a boyfriend who was responsible for caring for my kids while I was at work or otherwise occupied. I would never leave them with him again, I could tell you that for certain.
Doesn't really matter what their personal situation is. The fact is, the kid was struck for no good reason and the jerk should have been called on it.
If he made a stink or if she made a stink, SO WHAT, follow them and get a license plate number then turn them in!
You-re absolutely right
A few months ago I was at a class I take at the YMCA and one woman was telling us how her daughter-in-law had a miscarriage. She was saying how hard it was and finally I spoke up and said I too had miscarried. After I said that, at least 4 other women (out of a group of maybe 10-12) admitted they too had miscarried. I was stunned. I had no idea how many of us there were. Knowing I wasn't alone might have helped when I was going through it.
On the other hand, if anything good came of it, I think it made me a better mother. I cherished every moment of my children's lives and took none of it for granted.
Absolutely!
Men like that feed off of control. My ex did the same thing. Just pull your boots up! It'll be okay. Talk to your family (parents? siblings?), see a lawyer (don't tell your husband), and look at getting into counseling. I've been exactly where you are and I know what you're feeling. It's awful, but the sooner you get free, the better you'll feel and the better off your children will be.
Did I read that he stays off for days without contacting you?
Absolutely...sm
Any and all prayers appreciated. Thank you so much.
Sorry you went through the same thing. It certainly isn't good at all.
Absolutely NOT!....
You'd better give that to me and I'll take care of it for you.
(I am absolutely staaaving!)
This is absolutely
And surprisingly cute! Thanks for sharing...BTW, did you wear the ones you were given?
Absolutely
You have the right idea!! Where I live, Hard Rock Cafe had their 10th year anniversay Saturday night. My husband and I and a couple of friends (who are about 5 years younger than I am) decided to go. Rich music history here in my neck of the woods. When we walked in, the young girl standing at the hostess desk looked at us and said "Just to make sure you know it is our 10th anniversay and we will be having loud rock music tonight in case you want to eat dinner somewhere else". I asked her why she told me that because she didn't tell the couple that was in front of us. She said "well, I thought at your age you might not like it." I couldn't believe it. That's why we were there, to hear the bands that were playing.
Absolutely right!
The world needs more kind people like yourself and you are 100% correct about the animal cruelty!
Absolutely!
I met my best friend in 1975 when we worked together. I tell people I've had her longer than I had my husband (28 years). We have seen each other through second marriages, second divorces, the entire deal. Talk daily sometimes 2-3 times. And yes sometimes "a friend sticketh closer than a brother", in this case anyway!
Absolutely!
How could you do any less for a member of your family? You're not crazy at all; you're a sensitive, caring human being who puts love before money. Take care of yourself; everything will work out.
i have absolutely no
rear end. It's flat as a pancake. :=(
Absolutely
I have a family member with Parkinson's disease. He has the adolescent onset version so he's only now 39 and on disability. He cannot sit all day and work at the job he used to have at an investment firm. He has been in a car accident due to blanking out on medication. The only thing the doctors had left to tell him was take this medication which should work for about 10 years so you can work but after that you'll probably be debilitated. Well having 2 small children at the time, the answer was simple, be able to raise my family or be able to work. So he went on disability. Now he is able to active occasionally but his hands are real shaky and so is his voice. Whenever he has to go to the disability office, he is treated with contempt and disbelief until he hikes his 1 foot thick medical record file on their desk!
I also know of someone who was on disability that actually worked for the MT company I used to work for (this is hearsay mind you). Evidently she was using her husband's social security number to earn a paycheck! Whenever I meet someone or hear of someone cheating the system, I want them to meet my family member and explain to them why they think they are entitled to take money out of his pockets and his children's pockets. Makes me so mad!
Absolutely not. nm
bb
ABSOLUTELY!!
I posted above about my Canadian boyfriend. The taxes to pay for their universal/provincial healthcare are outrageous!!
Absolutely.
As an MT I cannot stand transcribing a social history that states "smokes 3 packs of cigarettes a day but denies the use of alcohol or drugs" and then has a positive alcohol or marij. screen. Why is one of the 3 considered acceptable in society and the others are not? To me, they are all essentially at the same level. They all have addictive properties and the potential for longterm complications, bad decisions, etc. If marij. has the potential of doing some good for anyone then I think it should be legalized.
Another good point you bring up is the cost of housing the so called "criminals" who have use it recreationally and could have just as easily used recreational alcohol and been involved in a drunk driving incident. It's all about education and setting limits. Sure there have to be guidelines but I don't think all should be punished because of the few exceptions.
You are absolutely right, he
could have done any of a number of things to cause A PIT BULL dog to attack and kill him. He could have yelled at the TV. He could have stepped on one of their feet. He could have fallen down. We don't know what happened, but the point is that no pet should ever be capable of killing a human with whom it shares a home. Other breeds recognize their master and other humans in their living space and take their rightful place. Most good, smart companion dogs would have recognized this man's special frailty and give him a wider berth. The instinct of these dogs to attack overcomes them and they can't turn off that instinct. This breed should never be kept as pets.
You should visit the web site I posted and click on the tab about pit bull owners. I find it very interesting that you have used the same phrases that most owners use to defend the breed.
Can you name one desirable character trait that a pit bull has that you cannot find in any other dog?
Absolutely!!!
I just met the love of my life 1-1/2 years ago, and I have a daughter in college, so I don't believe happiness is rendered elusive after a certain age.
After my man and I got together in what is indeed a story for "the grandkids," we discovered we had been at the same time/same place on multiple previous occasions, almost like fate kept dropping us into one another's paths until we finally interconnected. I had always held out and refused to settle, and I've ended up with the most wonderful man who treats me better than I had ever imagined. And, most importantly, someone who can make me laugh no matter what's going on around us.
I used to be a total skeptic about "love" and all that it entailed; however, once I met "the one," it totally changed my perception of love and just how life-changing and wonderful love can be. My friends say *glow* since I've been with him, and even his mother has seen a huge change in him since we got together. As corny as it sounds, I feel "complete" for the first time in my life.
Don't give up hope...Use your head to get yourself out of a bad situation, and then use your heart to follow your dreams. We ALL deserve happiness in life, and I'm a firm believer that fate will eventually have its way with us, and we end up right where we're intended to be.
You go, girl...grab that golden ring and don't let go!!!
You are absolutely right.......... sm
I found myself in a similar situation several years ago. The man, whom I loved very much and still do, decided that it was not within him to have a relationship with me because of religious beliefs. I do still love him very much and always will but I have come to understand that we are to never be together and I have moved on with my life. Hardest thing I've ever done, but I feel much healthier for it. My suggestion to the woman in the original story is that if she does love this man, then she must respect his decision and the sooner she does it, the quicker she will heal from the pain.
Absolutely not!
If it happened even just once, I'd be out of there in a flash.
absolutely and I think he is too! sm
My husband and I have been married for 13-1/2 years and were best friends for 4 years leading up to that. The single that I love most about him is that if I'm having a bad day, I can tell him that. I can say I need a hug cuz I'm having a really bad day and he's there for me. He listens if I want to talk about it and if not, he just holds me.
As for the groping thing, we always do that. Sometimes it turns into something more and sometimes we just end up giggling. We have 3 kids, so we've had our ups and downs. They range in age from 6 to 11. I think the biggest thing for us is that we're friends, first and foremost. I love him because he makes it easy for me to smile.
Absolutely
Better to agree to disagree than start a fight which is all too prevalent on the board. Have fun watching tonight. My daughter and I are always screaming at the TV when it's on. I definitely agree that most of the women were off last night. The girl you're talking about, I think you and I are thinking of the same one. That second guy I don't remember at all from the auditions.
Absolutely
Funny, when kids were spanked at home, they behaved at school. Now it's a crime to spank your child and the schools are filled with rowdy uncontrollable children who they now control by medicating them. Funny how no one had ADHD 40 years ago.
Absolutely...
I just hate that it always seems to be the fruit that I have to give up. When apples were 6 bucks a bag last year, I left them right in that store. A couple of weeks ago, the week right after V-day, strawberries were 4 bucks a pint, Seriously? The day before they had been 2 for 5. They stayed in the store. Grapes are expensive always it seems but my local grocer packages them smaller so I'm not paying as much, not getting as much but still it gives my kids a good snack for at least a day. S A D!
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