Speaking from the other side of the fence....
Posted By: MT and worn out on 2009-06-05
In Reply to: Child support questions - sm
I have a DH with an ex-wife. She went down every 6 months to get his child support raised. Whether she needed it or not.
All she did was call the caseworker at Friend of the Court (That's what we call it in Michigan). There is a copy of the divorce decree etc on file at the court house.
So I would think that if you called your version of Friend of the Court where you live, they would be able to help you get things rolling. And at no cost either. In fact, they have forms down at our courthouse.
Good luck.
Complete Discussion Below: marks the location of current message within thread
The messages you are viewing
are archived/old. To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select
the boards given in left menu
Other related messages found in our database
When 2 cars ride side by side on the interstate...sm
and block traffic so nobody can pass. I will get irate over this. I don't know where people's brains are.
fence
I would check out Home Depot or Lowes. You can look online and find the prices.
fence sm
Long time but (excuse typing, motherboard problems) - having it installed will cost you big bucks. Measure how many 8 foot sections you will need to complete the job, buy a post hole digger, be sure it's okay with your neighbor(s). The "nice" side has to be on their side and you will also need a level to be sure it is even. It's a job for more than 1 person, of course. We could not pay to have it done. Perhaps you could have a "fence party" - depending where you live, you may need to coat the posts for bugs before you bury them, or use steel postss. Hard to tell - depends on area where you live, type of material, wood vs. vinyl, style, etc., cedar or other. Best of luck to you, good fences make good neighbors, etc., also gates are expensive, but you may need to figure one in depending on set-up - installation too expensive, get some friends to help!
fence
how do you keep your cat in the fenced in yard?
Cost of fence??
Hi. My husband and I are getting ready to buy our first house and would like to know the approximate cost of getting a 6 ft privacy fence. We have absolutely no idea how much something like this costs :) Our new backyard is 85 x 110. I know the cost can vary, but can you please just give us an estimate if we had someone build it and also if we just bought the supplies and did it ourselves? Thanks for any info!
cost of fence
My hubby is a carpenter as is son. They buy their supplies for fencing through Home Depot or Lowe's or any building supply. I would go on line and Google fences, how to build and that should bring up some sites for building a fence, as to what supplies wood versus vinyl. The cost depends on where you live, as some areas are more expensive than others. I know you can buy directions on web sites on line, as I just ordered a design for a pergola my son is going to build for my daughter. You have to measure where your fence will be, then go to a store or on line. There should be someone at Home Depot or Lowe's or lumbar supply place who can help you. Also, having a company install a fence is much more expensive than doing it yourself. I know this well as my husband and son have put up a few fences. Hope this helps.
Thank you!! And to top it off, they dug holes to get under the fence onto OUR sm
property. There were at least 8 of them. I get sick every time I think about the irresponsible dog owners. The police came out twice and animal control never did show up for the incident. I should sue the city, to be honest. All of our goats were killed. We have 3 small children. Next, and I hate to say it, it could be them. I don't want to sell this place either. We love it out here. I hate being a prisoner on our own property.
There's one side, the other side, and the truth
And boy is it true.
I will say you sound like my aunt, who never speaks up, gets walked all over and then cries about it later.
Her kids/grandkids have no idea why she is always depressed, they think nothing of doing whatever they want without regard for her because she hasn't expressed an interest or opinion on anything and they don't know any better.
Yes, they use her. Yes, they could do things for her, but she never asks anything or says anything, so they don't press it, because it's always been that way. And she's a martyr, so it'd upset her pattern if things actually changed.
And the truth (and maybe reconciliation) lies in the middle somewhere.
Sad.
The fence did not cause the dog to die. The owner did by not making sure
the batteries were changed on a regular basis. The fence and the dog are blameless. The only one who had any control over the situation dropped the ball....poor dog.
Pricing out privacy fence...
When I landed at our place in 2002, I quickly learned I HAD to put up a privacy fence for the safety of my animals as well as the safety of the little kids who visit their grandparents next door, because I found them once too often in the pasture trying to pet the animals, and a hoof to their forheads would have been a very bad thing.
I went to Home Depot and quickly got discouraged at not only the cost of doing it yourself, but the labor and tools required. I live in New England and the ground is 90% ROCK...try digging a post hole through THAT and have fence posts spaced out appropriately...ain't gonna happen.
So, I called a fence place that was in the phone book. They came over FOR FREE, measured out what I wanted, sat down with me and a book and showed me what was available, gave me costs, and said "call us when your're ready."
You bet your bippie I went with the fencing company. They had 274 feet of 6' cedar privacy fence completely installed in ONE DAY for under $4000 (back in 2003). They had the guys, the knowhow, and the proper equipment. I had to go with metal pipes instead of wood poles because our ground is so wet and rocky, and I thought it would be ugly, but it has worked out absolutely wonderfully. I haven't painted or stained it either, just let it turn that pretty gray that cedar does.
You can see some pictures of it on my website here: http://www.perin.org/images/specialnelliewinta.jpg http://www.perin.org/Webpics/slides/Frogs%20yum.html
Best investment ever...not only for the safety factor, but also for the privacy, as you can see from the photos, even though we have lots-o-land, the neighbors were just too darned close. Grab your phone book, look up fence installation companies, and at least get those free estimates.
Put up an electric fence and fry her dogs. Then say OMG, I'm so sorry.
This house has no fence around it at all, to be exact. nm
,
My child has been on both sides of that fence (sm)
He has been bullied before but he has gotten really good at standing up for himself. I literally have given him comebacks that he can use if he is being verbally bullied, and have told him that while he is never allowed to start a fight he is always allowed to defend himself and even though he may get in trouble at school, he will not be in trouble at home.
One time last year (fifth grade) he was verbally bullying a boy in his class. He said some pretty mean things. I got the phone number to the boy's house through a mutual friend, called, and then too my son to the boy's house to apologize in person, in front of the boy's parents. We talked for a long time beforehand about how the boy must feel to have to go to school and have someone say things like that to him, role-playing such as "how would you feel if that was you" sort of thing. He also lost computer priveleges for a week. He has never bullied anyone else.
However, he did kick a boy in the shin earlier this year when the boy hit him and said he was going to beat him up. My son is strong but doesn't like to fight. I think all kids should be able defend themselves if needed though.
Secondary fence for dogs???
Can anyone please point me in the right direction as to how to go about installing a secondary fence/barrier in my yard, what material is best to use, etc.
My husband and I are trying to avoid spending money we don't have on getting a privacy fence just because our neighbors are idiots and don't feel the need to adhere to the rule of not letting the dogs out at the same time. We have been in our home for 3yrs now and our dogs have never gotten along. Granted they were here first (as my husband says), but I could care less because our dogs have just aabout that They are rather large dogs, we have two and they have three. Trying to break the fighting up when it happens is fraught with failure because when they get going its like trying to stop a moving train!
Unfortunately, neither side has the time nor energy to re-train the dogs, so I figure a secondary fence is in order due to the fact that there is already an existing 6ft chain link fence up. The fence does not belong to us and the neighbors have not taken the initiative to tweak the fence with slats, so it is now left up to us to figure out. I read that a secondary fence to that portion of the yard is the cheapest, non-permanant thing we could do to solve this problem.
There is teacher's side of story, kid's side of story
x
Speaking of that
One time about 5 years ago, I was driving on the interstate, my SO now DH riding with me. Was just passing the rear of a trucker, cars behind me so there were witnesses to this and I couldn't just slam on my brakes, put on his signal and tried to pull out anyway. Since I was already passing him, kept going, and he ran me off the road to the center. Pulled back on and continued to pass him, had his window open and flipped me off. I didn't see it because I was trying to control the car, but the funny part was my DH (SO) rolling down the window and hanging out giving him a double one back all the way until I got in front of the truck. I said WHAT is going on!! He told me the bas%$@d flipped you off. Come on, they're high enough up to see there's a car right in front of them they want to pass. I told SO I'm slowing down and get that guy's plate number so I can report him. He slowed WAY down and stayed so far back that I finally gave up... Guess he wasn't in such a hurry after all. We still laugh about my husband's ~chivalry~ that day, him hanging out there giving him the double what for! Wish I had a pic of that for posterity
Not dissing truckers here, my own brother was one for quite a while and have had a couple who stopped to help me and went out of their way when I had a flat tire on the interstate one time in rush-hour traffic on Friday afternoon. My brother said that was really nice of them because it's money out of their pocket, but he did always say to report truckers who are playing games because it's so dangerous.
Speaking for myself.....
it is quite the opposite. Any thread not adhering to the politically correct policies of this country is in danger of being deleted. Christians are not politically correct and never will be on this earth.
Speaking of AI
Is anyone here going to see them on Tour? Tickets go on presale tomorrow and I can't wait to get tickets. My friend and I take our daughters and go every year. We make a day out of it. We become groupies for the day. We've had great luck meeting most of the idols since season 5 and I'm looking forward to meeting Adam and Danny this year.
well, speaking from experience (OP)
I never "sat on the bench with my breasts out" after breastfeeding my son. Most women *put them up* after the job is done. Come on now, be realistic about this issue...
Speaking of condoms...
DS (15 yrs old) came home from school yesterday and I asked him what was new. He said the usual - "Not much."
Then.... "Oh, yeah, we learned how to put on a condom in sex class."
I about fell over!!!! Apparently, the teacher had a ... uh... plastic "subject" and she asked for a volunteer to come up and apply the condom to the ... uh... model. And it's called "Health class," but he refers to it as "sex class."
Whatever happened to food fights in school????
No, seriously, I'm glad they learn this stuff. You know what they say, "The More You Know...!"
His speaking out against it would scares me too. (nm)
x
sorry, His speaking out against it would scare me too.
x
not OP but statistically speaking there are far more
There are online websites documenting how many men versus women in each city of this country and the number of women today far outweigh the number of men......
jes sayin'.............
speakers not speaking!
help! i may need to test for a new job this weekend. Cannot understand why speakers aren't working. They are plugged into wall and correct port and turned on. Mute is not on. Checked in control panel and volume is up. I tried 2 different sets of barely used speakers. What else can i check? thanks.
And speaking of kids...
One time quite awhile ago I was pushing my youngest through the mall in his stroller. There were two boys goofing around in the middl of the mall with the parents right nearby. I had to stop suddenly because one of the darlings wasn't watching where he was going and fell over the stroller. I said, "Excuse me!" with just a bit of sarcasm and the father had the nerve to yell at ME because I was rude. I then informed him that his kid was the rude one and kept walking. That one still makes me shake my head.
You sound as though you are speaking from
Would you honestly want to be stalked by a man you thought you got rid of 19 years prior??? If the answer is yes, then I will gladly introduce you two.
I am not sure why they are no longer speaking
but in due to the fact that she has no contact wtih him, I don't think he should have stayed in the house once he found out she was there. She was visibly upset when she realized he was there and began crying. My phone then rang so I missed what she said to her other housemates. It just seems like this is not the place for this to be handled.
Speaking of spiders sm
We have a friend that just can't kill any living thing (I have no problem stepping on a spider, so sue me)anyway, she found a spider as she was getting in the shower, with a towel wrapped around her she went to set it free outside her back porch. Her hubby grabbed the towel, pushed her out, and locked the door. They were not in an overly populated neighborhood, but neighbors on each side could see. She says next time, she will just step on the spider.
Speaking of Salad...
what kind of lettuce/other green leafy stuff do you like when you order/make a salad?
A couple of times I've gone in restaurants and they have brought me a salad that looked like they went out back and pulled weeds. Now, I love veggies, but that's some scary stuff. I'm simple..I just want iceberg lettuce!...then I can add other goodies that I can identify.
Speaking of homecoming...
Doesn't it seem a little early in the season for homecoming? It's h/c at my DD's school also...I always remember h/c as being at least cool, jacket weather, not still warm in the 80s...
Speaking of Gardasil, I have a
Just curious if anyone here knows why they are not marketing this to males. I have two sons, and I'm not sure whether or not I would/do want them to have this, but I remember reading several months back about Australia providing Gardasil for males also, and my sister made an excellent point about males being more likely to have multiple partners or to not want to use condoms so more likely to spread the virus, even though they cannot get cervical cancer (not saying females don't engage in risky behavior, it just seems to me that oftentimes girls are pressured into sex and all too often they do it because they think there is something special about the relationship, when really it is all about scoring for the guy, but that is just my opinion and I do know there are good guys out there, and my sons are being raised to be a part of that group), so it makes sense to me that males should also be protected from contracting the virus to begin with, and that vaccination of males quite possibly could offer a greater measure of protection overall than vaccinating females. Just wondering what you guys think.
and speaking of slang......
the word bling just kills my ears I hear people my age (50s) and older saying it and that makes me cringe, especially if they say bling, bling.... guess next time I'll just say "Oh, snap"
speaking of dachsunds...sm
My friend has a dachsund about 7 months old and she is just impossible almost to house train. She said it doesn't matter how much she takes her out or how much she swats her with a paper for going in the house she just keeps on. Does anyone have exp with housebreaking them?
Speaking of girdles.....
I just saw Dr. Rey's undergarments advertised on HSN this week. They are supposed to be great and also very comfortable. You might want to check those out.
I am speaking with very little knowledge here..
I have only met one (1) pit bull in my life. It was very pleasant, wanted to be petted, and never hostile. What I did notice is how muscular it was and I remember thinking that I wouldn't want that dog to snap at me. All dog breeds are capable of being aggressive (especially if there is a dominance issue), but some breeds are more muscular and less *intidimated* by humans than other breeds. It seems to me (dog experts, please correct me) it would be easier to pull a Yorkie or a Cocker Spaniel off an attacked person than a pit bull. I don't know how that applies to bigger breeds like labs or retrievers.
However, my humble opinion does not make up for the fact that you could face the loss of a loved family pet. I hope it works out for you.
Speaking of pictures.....
My husband never knew his maternal GF, but was named after him. His maternal GF died long before he was born. Well, by the time my husband was in his 20s, he was the spitting image of his GF, right down to the mustache. My children used to look at the picture of their great GF and think it was daddy. They could have been twins. So, to have his mom name him after her father and then he turn out to be his spitting image, that is unbelievable! She had four other sons and none of them look like their GF.
Speaking of banks...
My DD opened her first checking acct a few weeks ago. She received her ATM card in the mail and, being a young woman, didn't want to wait on the PIN to come in the mail. So she took the card to the bank and had it activated. After this, the PIN she selected at the bank would not work, so she took it back to have it changed. She walks into the bank, tells the woman she needs to change her PIN cause the original one doesn't work...the woman takes the card, slips it into a machine, gets the new PIN from my DD, and she walks out with her card with a new PIN. The kicker is...the woman at the bank DIDN'T EVEN CHECK HER ID!!! For all she knew, my DD coulda found that card and brought it in to change the PIN so she could use it!
Speaking of shopping........
Anyone remember how the old stores were when there were 'Main Streets'? Remember the wood floors and the merchandise in wooden bins on tables? Remember the cookies and candy they sold that was all encased in glass? No escalators, and only the best stores had elevators? Elevators with a man asking 'what floor'?, elevators that creaked and had criss cross bars across the front, instead of doors that closed? Evening in Paris perfume for our mom's at Christmas, Old Spice or hankies with his initial on them for dad? Remember when all you could use was cash? And of course, those wonderful lunch counters? I remember one of them sold sardine sandwiches! Anyone remember?
Speaking from experience!
I was always attracted to younger guys, too. I met a guy who was 15 years younger than I am. Never been married, had no kids, minimal baggage, etc.
It started as totally physical on both of our parts, as I was always a 'use 'em and lose 'em' cougar.
Fast forward...We've been living together for 1-1/2 years and are getting ready to make this legal next week.
It's NOT age that matters. It's life experience that makes the connection and erases the chronological gap. My BF has lived as much and been through similar things in his life as I have been in mine. We have everything in common, from life experience to music to movies to our quirkly senses of humor. In areas where I'm weak, he's strong; in areas where he's weak, I'm strong. We're the perfect complement for one another.
Initially people think we're an unusual couple, but once they spend any time at all around us, they realize we're so much alike that we can almost read one another's minds and are perfect together.
Don't let that age difference influence you...Go with your heart. I never thought I'd change my ways and settle down, but ANYTHING is possible.
Good luck to both of you!!!
speaking from experience . . .
A similar thing happened a couple of years ago when my daughter was in 6th grade. A girl a couple of years younger told her she was going to kill her. This girl has some problems, but after thinking about it and talking with my husband, we decided to go to the principal. Now most kids say this not meaning it, but they need to LEARN IT IS NOT SOMETHING TO BE TAKEN LIGHTLY. It is WRONG, it is AGAINST THE LAW and they can be arrested for making terrosit threats like that to another person. it's this warped sense of what's right and what's wrong that leads these kids to major difficulties later in life. The principal tried to blow me off, but I told her one more time and I go directly to the cops. My daughter had nightmares and slept with me a couple of nights until I went to the principal and talked to her and told her what I would do if this ever happened again. This little girl never said anything like this again and is very aware of who I am and how she acts around me. CHILDREN NEED TO KNOW THEY ARE BEING WATCHED AND WHAT IS RIGHT AND WHAT IS WRONG. IT'S OUR JOB AS PARENTS. Haven't we all typed the ER reports where they hold a person for 24 hours after making threats??? I don't care how hold the child, this is a great lesson for her to learn.
Speaking of the dinner...
My son and his best friend, along with their dates went to a quite expensive restaurant before their senior prom in downtown Atlanta. Between the 2 boys, they probably had just enough for dinner, no dessert.
After their meal, the waiter brought out 2 big plates of dessert. Well, the boys kinda panicked...not knowing if the girls had ordered the desserts behind their backs or not, and knowing that they couldn't afford to pay for them.
Long story short, the waiter told the kids that someone in the restaurant had sent over the dessert and picked up their check! My son was so excited, he called me from the restaurant...thinking his dad and I had done this wonderfully generous act. It was tempting to take the credit, but we didn't.
They have no idea who it was but it made their night! I know, not related, but just a nice prom story!
speaking of scumbags
My BIL had ALS. My SIL put him in a nursing home and immediately got herself a boyfriend. When questioned by the family she said she needed someone to help her through this ordeal. BIL died, she remarried. Nobody in the family speaks to her anymore.
speaking of ignorance...sm
This young man, in some countries, would be considered a *man* by now and more than likely raising babies. Most *courts* in this country allow a *child* to choose which parent he/she wants to live with when the parents divorce. If the *child* is old enough to choose who he/she wants to live with, he/she should be old enough to decide if he/she does not want a *treatment* that is going to cause him/her much anguish and pain and suffering. A 13-year old is not a *child*, but a young adult and has had enough life experience to know what he/she wants out of life. If you understand this correctly, the mother is not refusing *treatment*, but rather refusing chemotherapy! There is a difference. The Bible states that for every disease and illness on the face of the earth, there is a cure and treatment. I do not believe it is referring to the thought that by throwing a bunch of harmful *chemicals* into the body that some pharmaceutical research person dreamt up with thoughts of $$ in his head, as a *cure*. Nature has already provided us with whatever we need to treat ourselves and our diseases. This is what this mother is searching for. How would you like to have someone tell you that you had to have a treatment that you don't want? Would you want someone to force you to be throwing up every half hour and lose your hair??? I highly doubt it.
Speaking of working or not......
My MIL is OBSESSED with whether or not we have any money and what we do with our money. It IRRITATES me to no end! I mean we HAVE our own money, we don't ask her for money, so get out of our bees wax!
She came to our house when I was re-decorating my bathroom. I was doing it in roses and I was buying the stuff for it piece by piece and she was in the store with me looking at stuff and I showed her the garbage can I was going to get and it had roses and matched everything else, although I didn't get it that day. SOOOO my MIL goes to the dollar store and buys me a plain white trash can and brings it over and tells me and my husband that she got that for a dollar and SAVED ME $19.00 for the 20 bucks that I was going to spend on a garbage can!!!!! I told her I wanted the other one because it went with my theme and she told me that was ridiculous because this one serves the same purpose! I was so mad, but trying to hold my tonge and then my husband told me he didn't want me getting the other one cause it may "hurt her feelings". He said if i got the other one to just trade them out when she came over. FURIOUS, FURIOUS, FURIOUS, that woman STAYS in our business, it's horrible!
speaking of coffee -- beans that is,
does anyone dip their c. beans in baking chocolate for snacks? I heard you can do this, but wondered if they are real hard, too strong or just plain tasty this way???
Just speaking the facts, ma'am, ;)
x
Speaking of Maury and You are not the father.
How come it only takes Maury 2 days to get results of paternity tests and they still haven't determined who Anna's baby's father is ?. Maybe Larry and Howard - are not the fathers ? Why do they need her DNA anyway ? Is there a question about her being the mother ? All very strange. But I do agree, poor thing, at least she with her first baby right now. She was quite wacky but still she was Anna Nicole.
Speaking of cats getting birds...sm
We have 2 feral cats that we feed (they've been trapped, spayed/neutered, vaccinated, then released, as the feral cat groups advise). They're actually very tame with us now. We've named them Isabelle and Nigel.
We have a covered patio area, almost entirely enclosed, where we feed them and have beds for them, so our dogs can't get to them (we call it the *cat house* LOL).
About a month ago, we went out to feed the cats at night, as usual, when what should fly into the cat house but a baby/young bird! It caught Isabelle's eye *immediately* (Nigel didn't seem to notice/care) but it was up high and she didn't move towards it. She seemed to be more focused on my husband as he prepared her food. I thought about trying to shoo the bird away with a broom, but I didn't want to startle it and send it right towards the cats.
Well, next thing you know, the baby bird decides it's time to fly away. As soon as it did, Isabelle took off after it at warp speed. It was amazing, really. She was up and over the fence after it in the blink of an eye. We stood there in shock, thinking there's *no way* she could have caught it. She was too far away from it when it took off. But then a few seconds later she jumped over the fence back into the cat house with it in her mouth, already dead.
Poor little thing. I wonder whatever possessed it to come in the cat house with 2 humans and 2 cats, at night. So sad, but that's the circle of life, I guess. ;o(
Speaking of weddings, tell me if I'm just being petty. SM
My father who is 68 years old and is getting married. I'm not all fond of the woman he is marrying, but it's his life and I'm not a kid anymore, so whatever. Thing is his woman is planning this obnoxiously big wedding complete with formal wedding gown and all -- 200+ guests with a fancy reception with dinner and dancing for everyone. Then she wants a honeymoon to Paris which she is planning. And I haven't even mentioned the engagement ring, let me just say $10,000!
So obviously I think this woman is over the top and a golddigger and a few other choice words I can't post on MTStars. Don't you think an older couple each in their second marriage should have a smaller, family and close-friends only kind of a wedding? Personally, I think if she wants such an extravagant honeymoon, she cut costs in the actually wedding and reception.
I've been holding my tongue, but I really want to say something to my dad. Should I? Ever since he starting dating this woman, I've been polite and friendly, kept my mouth shut. Now that he has decided to marry her, I'm like WOA! Am I just being territorial?
Speaking of dangerous LIARS
Have you made note of the people running OUR country into the ground - while killing with abandon in Iraq, etc., ad nauseam?
Speaking of leather furniture sm
Does anyone have any idea how to make worn spots look like new again? We have a huge medium-tan set, not the darkest, not the lightest, 3-4 years old and some of the seats and arms are beginning to look very faded. I hate to put the wrong treatment on there but it was very expensive and doubt the store would do anything about it. I think it's starting to look shabby but it's my husband's fave and he refuses to "see it" fading. Thanks.
|