So many cool shoes out there. Purple pumps or sandals probably won't be hard to find. nm
Posted By: Got a DSW near you? nm on 2007-03-08
In Reply to: Deep Purple Dress - what color shoes to buy?
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- Deep Purple Dress - what color shoes to buy?
- So many cool shoes out there. Purple pumps or sandals probably won't be hard to find. nm - Got a DSW near you? nm
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My 15-yo son shops on line at Old Navy and Hot Topic, shoes.com. And he's cool. As for haircut.
Cool! How do you find those? sm
I've never seen any links like that...that I was aware of.
My husband always claimed since he had seen my first 2 C-sections as well as watched 1 on TV that he could've delivered our third child at home. LOL!
This is a cool thread... love the honesty and find everyone very intriguing. nm
You are not alone. I find it hard to transcribe...
without the music because I tend to get too lost in the dictator's voice and the background noises. It seems if I have my own background "noise" it's easier to block theirs out. Also, with faster music it seems I type faster. That's a great thing about working at home - it's all MY music.
In Louisville, it is hard to find gas just
because we originally over 200,000 customers without electricity, now down to about 189,000. Police are directing traffic at local convenience stores because of all the people trying to get gas at the same time. This is in the aftermath of 75-80 mph winds we had come through on Sunday. They are saying here 10 to 14 days before they get all the power back on. School is out, and governor says over 1/2 million here in Kentucky still have no power.
I still find it hard hearted...
Comparing your father in law to a father is not the same thing. This woman is an adult and her father was there while she was growing up. I just think that raising children earns a little compassion and respect. Call me silly. I also think that it is a little unfair that we only get one side of the story. I just hope that she does not write him off and live to regret it. Heaven forbid we act as caring people during the holiday season.
Please provide documenatation; I find that very hard to believe.
A good doctor is hard to find.
I found a good doctor in Cleveland, Ohio. He was never in a hurry. He always retook my blood pressure. He would read my chart from the last visit and talk to me about issues I had then. He would always come up to me and say "Hello, how are you doing," and shake my hand. When I cried (when my granddaughter died), he held my hand and comforted me. The bad news, I moved 2 months ago to Oklahoma. I bet I will not find another one like him here. There are some good doctors....just not enough of them.
Is it hard to find considerate people these days? sm
seems like no one is considerate of anyone else anymore. I dropped a few friends because of it. A recent friend is being inconsiderate also, husband wonders why I still do things with her. Well, you know, you can't just not have any friends and since everyone seems to be that way, what else can you do? People are late, don't follow through, are self-centered, etc. The way of the world these days I guess.
Got a question for empty nesters. Do you ever find that you want to do things and it is so hard to
find someone to do things with anymore. Do you just go alone and how does that work out or take a bus trip or what do you do. If you sit around waiting on someone to fit into your schedule you may never get to do anything. BTW, I am divorced also.
Since I'm not average sized, it's hard for me to find really nice fitting clothes.
But I do know how to sew, just haven't done it for a long time. I have stacks of really lovely fabrics, from wools to silks in my attic. Lots of it is inherited stuff that is now vintage. I have a serger and a good machine, and lots of beautiful classic patterns. I did make a nice wrap dress for the holidays, so I've been inspired to do more. What I'd like to do is find a really good used dress form somewhere... maybe ebay. It's so much easier to tailor the fit if I can stand next to a dress form, exactly my size, and adjust the pattern and seam lines. You can't do that while you are wearing an incomplete garment with pins in it! It's like trying to cut the back of your hair for yourself.
Shoes! Love shoes. Thin soles work best.
Don't be mad, but foot size might have something to do with it. I'm a 7 1/2 shoe size, and I suspect a foot much bigger than that might be a bit wide to easily hit the right pedal every time. Remove the shoe and your foot is narrower and you can feel the controls and not hit the wrong one. Just a guess because I've heard guys have the worst time with the pedal.
I wear Berkie sandals with socks now
NM
There are other places to go, much better, in Negril. The Sandals resorts are all sm
very nice, clean, well run, lots to do, good food, etc. There are are 2 RIU resorts, but they are not on the main part of the 7-mile beach and they have their hands out for tips often. Sandals and Beaches (owned by Sandals) employees will not accept tips even if you try. We have been to Negril 4 times and LOVE it. I have heard that about Couples though and also about Swept Away.
Earth Shoes....heel lowered in Earth Shoes
i have purple ones I have
transplanted from my fathers home to mine and this will be the first year for blooming here. I so hope they come back as the purple, beautiful but you know has lot to do with the soil as to their color.
Purple Rain
cranked up so loud the pictures fall off the walls.
Deep Purple Dress
Bridesmaid dresses in a deep purple. Not sure if I should go for metallics- gold or silver or stick with black? The wedding is in the afternoon in church and a reception at a golf course. What do you think?
Love him with a purple passion!
Wish I had met him before the other 3. We have 9 years and he was just telling me yesterday about how much he loves me, told me he thinks about me all the time and repeated the same several times.
I have heard about Fantasia and the Color Purple.
Apparently Oprah has decided to give her a shot. I just hope she got some acting lessons. Anyone see her movie? Yikes :)
Dr. Zhivago, Godfathers I and II, Color Purple.
nm
That's so cute! Love the code purple and the medicinal use
nm
Those pups loved tugging on the purple 'bobo.' nm
x
purple. Brad Pitt or Johnny Depp?
x
go to the site, click the purple tab to help feed animals.
nm
I say silver. Will they be playing music by Deep Purple at the wedding? lol
x
Animal rescue web site - click purple button daily
please go to following site, all you need to do is click the purple button in the middle of the page, daily, to help keep the website up and take care of animals.
http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/clickToGive/home.faces?siteId=3
see website inside, click purple tab daily to support shelter pets
http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/clickToGive/home.faces?siteId=3
Find a lawyer, find out where you would stand - sm
in the event of a divorce/separation, regarding custody, house, etc. Custody was my main concern as well since I lied on numerous occasions about the finances. Where I am I was told that would not factor in to the custody at all. I can prove that I am my kids caregiver 90% of the time, I ferry they around everywhere, help with homework, get ready for school, meet at busstop, etc. I could also point out my husband is an alcoholic, self treats his depression with alcohol instead of getting proper medical treatment, has threatend to kill himself (or me) numerous times (though he always says he was joking and did not mean it.....that is his standard answer to everything, or that he never said that). Now I do love him enough to deal with all that because deep down inside my DH is full of it, luckily for me, he has never followed through on anything he says he is going to do. But I thought my confession would be the straw that broke it all and send him over the edge. He still is angry with me, I am sure he will be for a long time, but is keeping it together pretty well, though he has said the stress was going to kill him, now he know how I felt I guess. I am sorry your husband is such a smuck. I feel like a dog sometimes with the sex demands, have to do it the night before he goes out of town....he will be traveling a lot for work for the next 3-4 months, which I am more than glad about, much calmer here then, though it gets tiring for me but as he is not really helping much right now it really won't be much of a change. As for yours going on 5 day weekends.....have you considered having him followed, sounds like there may be some infidelity afoot, and if so that would strengthen your case in the event of a divorce and custody I would think. Sounds a bit fishy going out until 1 a.m. and his frequent trips. My DH fishes too, but he goes 2 miles from here with one of our male neighbors, they shoot the breeze and he gets to unwind some which I encourage. Very rare weekends with a buddy of his, I am talking once every 2 years, which again is fine with me. Start keeping track of all you do, when he is home, where he supposedly goes, with whom, etc. He cannot show he will be a responsible dad if he is never there or never interacts with his own kids. My DH would probably suggest I take our older daughter and he the younger, spliting them up, he has the same perception, the oldest is mine, the youngest is his. Our younger daughter is much easier to deal with, our older daughter drives him nuts and she is only 10. My younger one (8) knows something has been going one though, and worries we will divorce, which she does not want. She is very perceptive for her years. I hope that if you do go the divorce route, which would actually probably be best in your situation, that it all works out for you and you get your fair share of assets, etc. Make sure before you do anything like that you have all your ducks in a row, so talk to divorce lawyer. I talked to one for 45 minutes, cost me $160 but was worth it to set my mind at ease. Good luck.
shoes
I wore silver shoes with a purple bridesmaid dress. We also had silver/grey shaws to go with. This was in November.
In your shoes
Your story sounds exactly like mine. However, mine told me that if I did not lose weight he was going to leave me. He had an affair and blamed it on the fact that I was overweight. He said, "If you were not so fat, I wouldn't have gone there." Whatever!
Don't let him win - just MHO - same shoes here (sm)
I'm sorry for you - I know how it feels. People like that are best ignored, but would not want my kids exposed. My stepdad is just like that.
Put yourself in her shoes SM
If you had gone through a whole pregnancy and hoped for the "perfect" baby and things weren't perfect? The clubbed feet are correctible, yes, but seeing as she asked you not to say anything to anyone she is obviously having trouble coming to terms with the problem. She is a new mom, there is a problem she obviously is troubled about, hormones all over the place. I think backing WAY off is in order here. Respect her wishes and let her call you when she is ready. Being a new mother is overwhelming no matter how many times you've done it and she needs time.
at least ur not in my shoes
I would love for my husband to make advances towards me like that!!! I'm the one having to hug him and beg him. I agree with a below poster...don't push him away...enjoy what you've got. at least he wants to touch you.
Wish I was in your shoes.
I would do it in a heartbeat. Don't be afraid. Like another poster said, you can always move back. I now have a husband and kids and my family lives about 8 hours away. I miss my niece and nephew dearly but see them as often as I can. I stayed a month when each was born and then traveled every other weekend for several years. They are getting to be school age now so they know me well and I send things often. It has just become too expensive to travel that much.
I would just keep in mind with your BIL being in the military they may not be where they are longterm so that could pose a sticky situation if you get involved with someone special. Might want to talk to your sister. I know mine knows me better than anyone and always has great advice.
I have been in your shoes (sm)
I was in an abusive marriage and had children. I stayed way too long out of fear, I should have left years before I did. Just make sure you have tried everything to make your marriage work before leaving or you may have regrets. If it is something you feel you must do, you will be fine. It's not easy, but you'll make it. You'll have to work more and do without sometimes but you also should get child support to help.
My mom was in your shoes
Married Bob, our step-dad. He came on to all three of her daughters, sometimes right in front of her. She made excuses for him and downplayed what he did. She was blinded by his money. And of course he denied whatever, pretending it was all in friendliness.
He fooled around with my little sister, I had her move in with me and threatened to call the law. Mom cried and begged - oh, what will happen to the rest of the family? How will they live without Bob's money? Oh, the poor man is threatening to kill himself vs go to jail. Please, keep my mouth shut. He's sorry and won't do it again. Oh, and little sister was probably asking for it and to blame as well (yes, mom would rather blame her own child than precious Bob)!!!!
He went on to seduce a cousin, then her young daughter, and mom even caught him red handed molesting his own DOG!!!!! She stayed with him though, for the sake of his money and supposedly her family, although by then, most of us would not set foot in their house. My brother, who was growing up under his influence, also now has a thing for underage girls that are his relatives. Nice, eh?
He spent them into the poor house, and by the time he died, all his money was gone. My sisters and I refuse to even be buried in the same graveyard as that creep. Mom dug him up and moved him to his own family plot about 10 years later, but the damage is done to her relationships with her daughters.
So if you want to end up like my mom, deny, shift the blame, and believe him. Sacrifice your whole family and stand by your man. You'll get what mom got - shame and blame and many years alone to play should've/could've/would've.
Been in your shoes
I am sorry to hear of your troubles. I know exactly how you feel, because my son was addicted to drugs with meth and binge drinking being his poisons of choice. Of course, he'd take anything--and I do mean anything--if he thought he could get a buzz from it. Every time I heard an ambulance wail in the distance, I'd wonder if today was going to be the day he overdoses to the point of being unsaveable. Every time somebody knocked at the door or if a police car would slow down in front of the house, I'd wonder if today was the day I was going to get notified that he finally died from his addictions. My heart bleeds for you...it really does. I know the heavy heart you have, and I know all about the soul-searching about what could I have done to prevent or maybe I even caused it.
Well, nothing you did caused it, and you definitely can't control its outcome since he is an adult, and he makes the decisions as to what he wants to do or not do with his life. I know that's hard to accept, because I went over and over in my mind with the "what ifs."
The best you can do right now is to not enable his habit. That means not giving money for rent (my son spent all his rent money on meth and booze and marijuana and other noxious chemicles), not bailing him out of jail, not giving money for groceries or even giving him groceries for that matter. That was hard for me. However, if he needed a meal, he was always free to come to the house >sober< and not under the influence of drugs and enjoy a meal. I think he came only once.
I lost track of him for 8 years or so, and then I learned he was living behind a dumpster in Boston during the coldest spell of the last century. I managed to get him out of that environment, and he did okay for a while. He had to go back to Massachusetts to serve a 60-day jail term, but he did that and cleaned up.
He was doing okay for a while and then he ran with "the crowd" and ended up back on meth and other drugs. He was again hooked, and this time it was a 4-year hiatus into that misery for him. I put him out of the house about 4 years ago, and the last time I saw him, I burst out crying because my baby was down to skin and bones, and he definitely looked like he was dying. So, for the past few years, I've been dreading the wail of sirens and knocks at the doors.
Well, about 3 days ago, I get a call out of the blue, and it was my son, wanting to come over. I was suspicious, of course. (In my mind, I thought about what else he was going to steal, etc.)
When I saw him for the first time in 2 years a few days ago,I truly did not recognize him. He had put on 65 pounds (not fat either), looks reasonably healthy, and he has "the sparkle" back in his eyes. Before, they were soul-less black orbs. Now, they shine. I found out that he has been drug-free and alcohol-free for almost 2 years now but that he was hesitant to make contact because Narcotics Anon. suggests only coming back and apologizing when able to make full restitution money-wise. Well, he didn't have the money, but he did apologize.
So, I really do know how you feel and all the pain, sorrow, and worrying you are going through and just how much greater those feelings will get for you. It will be a whole lot more intense as time goes on.
You need to get somebody to talk to for yourself. I tried the local Narcs Anon and a few of the other addiction groups as well as a couple of private counseling sessions.
Remember this: You didn't cause it, and you can't control it. Just don't enable him with money or gifts (he'll just trade or pawn whatever you give him for drugs...my son did.
If you need somebody to talk to about this, feel free to email me. I feel for you. I won't lie. It's going to get really, really rough...but no matter what he says/does, you didn't cause it.
Kathleen
If I were in your shoes - sm
First of all, take a deep breath. I would definitely ask him about it. I would also INSIST that he go to a marriage counselor with you. It does not sound as if you did it when it first happened, but you need to go. You have lots of unresolved feelings and rightfully so. I would tell him your marriage hinges on what action he takes. If he refuses, go alone. It seems like he is still holding on in some way to the memories and keeping in contact with her. Your marriage can recover from this with time, counseling, and 100% honesty from him. He needs to become an open book to you. It is not the end of the world, though it might seem like it now. My heart goes out to you. Best wishes.
How much is too much for shoes?
My husband always tries to get me to buy name brand shoes from an overpriced shoe store.... which I have to put insoles in anyway for my plantar problem!!!! Last time I bought shoes I went to Walmart and bought them for 20 and then put my insoles in them and it was fine. I saw these shoes made for walking by Sketchers and went online to look at them and they turned out to be $175!!! I was like WOAH!!! I actually like Sketchers, but good god I cant believe how much some shoes cost..... SO THE QUESTION IS HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY FOR SHOES??? HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY FOR YOUR KIDS SHOES???
Pay for shoes
I'm one who can wear shoes from Payless so I usually get shoes for $20, sometimes less if they're on sale. I have a friend who once said to me, I bought 2 pairs of shoes and spent $100 and she was excited about that. I laughted and told her I could have gotten at least 5 pairs or shoes, maybe more for that price. I try to get the kids shoes at Payless also, at least the youngest.
what color shoes to buy
See what color other bridesmaids are wearing, all should be same. Beige or cream color is a good choice. Gold/silver better choice for evening & not at golf course.
Oh me too. Love shoes!
It's a sickness really. :)
At one point I had well over a hundred pairs of shoes. I have thinned that down to about 10 pairs now but I am so tempted to buy shoes whenever I see some that I really like.
Why are big size shoes always
Short people don't have big feet, tall people do.
I've been in your shoes too - sm
Warning bells went off when you said he's gone 6 nights out of 7 (drinking, "sleeping it off") and that you believe his excuses. I did too but turned out he cheated on me for several years and finally gave me an STD (one of the "minor" ones at least).
Get out now. He's emotionally unavailable. Google "better than nothing relationships".
I was in your shoes at one time too -
I lost a job after 13 years and of course a person cannot always afford COBRA. So of course I had no health insurance for 3 years. That being said, I also was on 2 different antidepressants that cost almost $300 a month. My doc, bless his heart, put me in touch with a program for "Indigents and Transients". Don't let the title put you off...what it is is a program by some drug companies that will provide you your medications free of charge. No cost to you at all. All you do is fill out any necessary paperwork. It is income based, so your husband being laid off will be a help.
Your son may have to fend for himself for the duration. You raised him the best you could, taught him what he needed to now, and now he has made his choice. Tough as it may be for you, you need to get yourself taken care of first. No one can take care of you except yourself.
Where I live in Michigan, we have a program through United Way of MI that you can call and they can steer you in whatever direction you need to go...food pantry for feeding your family, low-cost or free health care, social services, etc.
Is your husband a veteran? My DH is a vet, Vietnam era, and the VA has resources you can use too. The "Veteran's Trust Fund" helped pay our mortgage one time when we hit the wall. They only wanted to know what had happened and how we had gotten behind. Also too, check into any of your county programs. When I lost my job, I was considered low-income (DUH!) and the state of MI came out and replaced our leaky doors with metal, leakproof doors ND blew in insulation to help cut down the heating bills.
Please, please, don't feel like the Lone Ranger. There are a lot of us out there that would fall apart at the seams if our paychecks were even one day late.
I will keep you and your family in my prayers as any time is a bad time to be in this boat, let alone at Christmas time.
OK, I'm giving it a try again, except for the shoes.
I cleaned my sink last night and will keep that clean. Got up this a.m. and got dressed and ready for the day, which does indeed make a difference in my attitude. The only thing I won't do is wear my shoes in the house. This is something I've never done. It's not a cultural thing, it's must a me-thing. I'm always in socks in the house and keep my Crocs by the door for quick trips outside to mailbox or garden. The only time I wear shoes is when I'm out and about. This is something I've done all my life, and it just feels very weird for me to have shoes on in the house.
me and my laced up shoes
They are on when I hit the floor and not off until I hit the hay. (I think flylady thinks it is important to prevent napping), but I can cat nap with my shoes on :)
Even my casual shoes are $130, sm
my dress shoes usually run about $200-$250. I buy shoes that are constructed well and last for years. I have a pair of pumps that are about 20 years old and look brand new except for wear on the sole. I don't have hundreds of pairs, less than 15 pairs in 20 years, but I take really good care of them and get them repaired/resoled when needed.
I probably have spent less in 20 years on shoes that a person who buys $20-$40 shoes over the same time period.
I'm close to being in your shoes
Lots of sharp replies from people who probably don't know the whole story.
I've been fighting it for some months now and it is going to take months before I can recover. An MTSO I worked for lost a client in November, but that was okay because I had a doctor account and a second MTSO job to pick up the slack. In February the first MTSO lost another client and as I was low man on the totem pole, my account was given to those without work and I was let go. Still okay, I thought, because I would just make the second MTSO the primary MTSO...which worked for about a week when I got the notice that MTSO was cutting my pay by 70% by switching to VR editing. Okay, I had some notice and I found another company to make my primary MTSO but it has taken time to build up my lines - took a pay cut but grateful to have a job and still had the doctor account. Now I've heard this new MTSO will soon be switching to VR editing. 
I had just signed the lease on the apartment I am in. I am single with no family to help and have a 6 yo child to raise without CS. Everyone goes through a bad patch sometime in their life and I hope this is as bad as it gets. I have my health and the ability to look for another job. My LL has been very understanding and is working with me for a couple of months. Even though money will still be tight for a while, at least for another month there is a roof over our heads and a chance to work to turn things around.
I hope things turn around for you soon 
Had one that was tinkling in the closets and in particular in our shoes. (sm)
I found bloody pee in one and called the vet to take all 3 of them in for a checkup. Sure enough, UTI. One of them very obligingly peed on the floor in the waiting room and we could easily see who had the bloody pee. He did check the other two out, only the one had it. I now use only cat food with special urinary pH formula. I think it has helped, no problems for years now.
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