Same boat, just too afraid to post it.

• Want to leave my marriage but I'm scared!! Need viewpoints (sm) - MomMT
  • Thank you all for your replies (sm) - MomMT
  • Additional questions for all of us going through this... - Silly Girl
    • Talk to a lawyer first - sm - In-debt MT
    • Well I do know that our state is 50-50 (sm) - MomMT
    • questions - anon
      • I'd like to add that - sm
      • Wow - me too, except - Me
        • Think it over VERY carefully - Mid Life Crisis?
          • Thanks. - Me
  • Do you know how many times yesterday - Silly Girl
  • You can do it - NewCareer
  • Leave now - finally free
  • I've been there s/m - MI-MT
  • Worry about finances but don't worry about insurance. sm - LMT
  • Same boat, just too afraid to post it. - Sonic
  • I have been in your shoes (sm) - anon

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It was damned if you do, damned if you don't.  Nerves were on edge all the time. I really wish you the best. 

Here's what I did: I took our two kids and got OUT before he killed all of us. I have never looked back, never regretted having to work two and three jobs to support us.  It wasn't easy, we struggled, but we were SO much happier not having to tippy-toe around him anymore.

Kids are grown now. My son sees his dad, still tries to please him, very sad. Daughter has NOTHING to do with him and won't let her daughter see him.

Sorry didn't mean to turn this into a rant or a book, it just struck a chord with me.

Not saying that's what you should do at all, just that's what I did. I will say a prayer for you all. And for those of us who have survived it. God help us.

I am pretty much in the same situation and can relate to what you are going through.  My problems with debt started because I decided to quit a job making 45,000/yr to do medical transcription in which I am lucky if I make 20,000/yr.  I could not keep up with my own personal bills and instead of confiding in my husband, I put bills on my credit cards and every payperiod swore to myself that my paycheck would increase, but easier said than done since I do VR and the pay stinks.  My husband thinks MTing is ridiculous for the pay and hard work we do.  I was insisting upon staying with it and had too much pride to let him know I could not pay my own personal bills.  When I did finally tell him he was upset that I would put myself in debt, knowing that as a couple, our debts affect each other.  I am now seeking help from CCCS, a counseling service that has a very good reputation.  Just make sure you pick a reputable, nonprofit agency, and they will put you on the right track back to financial stability.  Needless to say, I am going back to the work I used to do and doing MTing on the side.

Best of luck to you!

He has more (material things) than you do and most men of 60s+.  He has a home that he has worked to own -- not given to him!  Material things do not mean much to me, however.  I make my own living.  He has an engineering and Masters degree.  How many degrees do you have?  He is very athletic!  He has had olympic training.  He is a wonderful man who MANY of you would desire and don't have.  He knows that pleases a woman and EXACTLY what he wants in life.

Most important to me is that he expresses that he is a "God-fearing" man.  There is NOTHING in life more important to me than that!

He has no kids -- not a priority in life for him.  He is too wonderful to describe!  I know more about him than you will ever know about your partner, because we COMMUNICATE. 

Sorry for your skepticism.  But I will take it with a grain of salt, as it deserves to be taken. 

This man is an open book -- but not only that, but he hides nothing. 

WOW is all I can say about him !  Have never met a man like this in my entire life!  He wants to please me, and he is certainly capable of doing that.

He has more (material things) than you do and most men of 60s+.  He has a home that he has worked to own -- not given to him!  Material things do not mean much to me, however.  I make my own living.  He has an engineering and Masters degree.  How many degrees do you have?  He is very athletic!  He has had olympic training.  He is a wonderful man who MANY of you would desire and don't have.  He knows that pleases a woman and EXACTLY what he wants in life.

Most important to me is that he expresses that he is a "God-fearing" man.  There is NOTHING in life more important to me than that!

He has no kids -- not a priority in life for him.  He is too wonderful to describe!  I know more about him than you will ever know about your partner, because we COMMUNICATE. 

Sorry for your skepticism.  But I will take it with a grain of salt, as it deserves to be taken. 

This man is an open book -- but not only that, but he hides nothing. 

WOW is all I can say about him !  Have never met a man like this in my entire life!  He wants to please me, and he is certainly capable of doing that.

Dh and I have had our 401k for years and this is the first year we each dipped out of it to make ends meet.  I was working from home and got pulled in-house.  I am spending $100 a week on gas plus another 120/week on daycare. I don’t know if I should count daycare our not because I would have my kids in daycare anyway.  I am not talented enough to do MT and watch kids at the same time.  Also, I am have been buying new clothes, buy lunch, vendors in the hallways selling anything from jewelry to clothes to stuffed toys to benefit the Children’s Miracle Network, United way, Hospital Auxiliary, or just goes into a fund for fellow employees who maybe suffering from hard times.  Then there is always the in-departmental fund raises for birthdays, “so and so is going on a cruise lets pitch in a dollar” or some ones kid is doing a fundraiser for their school, sport or whatever and then coworkers selling Avon, Mary Kay or whatever and I just feel the pressure.  Never in my life had I felt the pressure to spend, spend spend as this year that I worked in-house.  What’s worse our name tags function kind of like a debit card, just swipe that sucker and they payroll deduct.   Sorry to vent but I want to be back home! 

I'm scared to death of flying.  Have never been on a plane and never plan to be on one either, unless it is a dire emergency and I have no choice.  Hurricanes scare the bejezzums out of me. After going through Andrew, Katrina, Rita, and Gustav, I think I will go as far north as possible next time...if I can afford to.  I never want to go through that again...even being 90 miles inland, it is still terrifying when they hit here (the wind is what we have to worry about).  I'm afraid of losing my home, my family, and dying alone as well.  I'm also afraid of dust and pollen...I'm highly allergic to both and stay indoors when pollen season hits (which is three times a year here...for dust, I just try to keep the house as clean as possible).

I'm not afraid of spiders (unless they are black widows, which we have here), non-venomous snakes, raccoons, tigers, dogs (used to be), or being on or in the water.

I'm a little scared to try this.  I'm 45, but I'm really scared it'll tell me my brain is 72!!!

I have no daughters, just sons, but not one of them seems to want the responsibility of taking care of us in our later years. We do not want to go to a nursing home. We want to die at home.

I know I could not live alone on our property without a helping hand if something would happen to my DH and have been thinking about what to do since his surgery 2 years ago.Where would I go? What would I do? I surely don't want to leave this property after living here over 40 years, but don't know of any way to do it if something would happen to him.....and so, I think about it all the time. Even now, I have trouble taking out the ashes and definately (sp) could now carry the coal in now, yet living in the "country" for over 40 years, I don't think I could live in a town again to save my life.  

Too afraid I would transcribe everything absolutely strict verbatim, including background/cell phone conversations and the like.   

Nearly as well as I know dogs, so I can't answer your question about whether it's normal or not (the hardened nipples) but it doesn't sound normal.  It can't hurt to call the vet and ask. 

I would also suggest that you make an appt. (if you haven't already) to get her spayed ASAP, because she can and very likely will go into heat again right away since it's that time of year (some people call the warmer months 'kitten season.') 

I happened to find this website yesterday, while looking for something else:    http://marvistavet.com/html/body_giving_birth_to_kittens.html

Here is a quote from it:

>> Nursing the litter generally suppresses the return to cycling but the average female cat is back in heat about a month after delivery of the litter. If she has access to a male cat, she will likely become pregnant before she is finished weaning the current litter. >> 

Wow, before she's even finished weaning the current litter?  Amazing (and a little shocking?!) 

If you go to your regular vet, you can probably get her in to be spayed pretty quickly, but it will cost more than a low-cost spay/neuter clinic.  (Might want to get her teeth cleaned too if she needs it, since she'll be under anesthetic anyway, and the anesthesia is usually the biggest part of the cost.) 

If you go to a low-cost spay/neuter clinic it will cost less, but you might not be able to get an appt for 2-3 weeks or more.  If she's in heat again by then, they will either not do the surgery, or (more likely) they will charge a little bit more for it because it makes the surgery a little more complicated (increased risk of bleeding when they're in heat). 

I hope she's okay as far as her nipples.  Can you let us know/give an update? 

let their kids play outside because of the numerous kidnappers and pedophiles wandering around your neighborhoods.