Please explain "too busy"?...nm
Posted By: phillychick on 2008-04-15
In Reply to: Well not everyone has the self-worth that you have sm - Falling apart MT
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Careful not to generalize "too" much
I am dying to get OUT of a 'fancy-pants' area and back into the country, but there are tons of stuff not so much fun in the country, too, like being ostracized (Sp?) for being different. I'd give my eye-teeth (where did THAT saying come from?!) to find a middle ground: Progressive rural.
I think the problem is that I actually gave him "too much' control and now sm
I am trying to gain it back. I have always been so lenient, always allowing them to make decisions about what they want for breakfast, etc. So, the nicer I was, the ruder they became. Then when these temper tantrums started I started "taking away" control from him and not rewarding bad behavior, etc. So, now I believe I am just reaping what I am sowing.
I appreciate your response. I don't think there is any easy answer at all. I know that. I think it is trial and error. I have 3 young boys. The other 2 never behaved like this. This is new to me. Husband and I have treated all 3 the same - this one is just very testing and trying. Thanks for the responses. No more from me. I don't have time for this right now. Thanks!
Hey, Busy
I just wanted to say, YOU ROCK!! You always have the best advice. Thanks for sharing. :)
I'm never too busy for my kids....
for having a slap fight with another child before school started. I will never in all my life forget that. It was awful and felt even more so because I am female. I don't know what your daughter did to deserve this, but whatever it is as opposed to paddling she should be asked to write a report on why whatever she did is not appropriate. It should have to be so many words and so many paragraphs, grammatically correct, and put forth in a positive manner. I can see her having trust issues with men after this paddling situation especially older male figures in years to come.
I hate to sound judgemental, but your post comes off like you are just way to busy to deal with your children when in fact you are responsible for them until they are 18. I sure hope she doesn't hold this against you, but that's what I did at first. I blamed my Mom for letting this man paddle my private area. 
you should really do that...keeps a body busy. NM
..
he can't be too busy if he's able to call that often...lol..nm
x
Response to Busy MT'ing
Love your post. In fact, I copied and pasted it in a personal folder under "Parenting". Thank you -- it's very clear and concise, EXCELLENT advice.
I'm a single parent of an 11-year-old (my two sons who are 25 and 21 are no longer living with me). My daughter is well behaved (I'll eat my words, I'm sure) right now; but I know that with the preteen and teen years, I'm going to have my hands full w/her.
One more thing I'd like to add to your post is to be sure to watch all computer activity. The Internet is a dangerous place for developing minds if used in a negative manner.
Thanks again!
Right back at ya' busy mt'ing..
May you and yours experience the wonderous joy of the holiday season now and in many years to come!!!  
Merry Christmas to you Busy
Thanks. That was a lovely post. 
My SO is too busy working to have many outside interests.
He's a workaholic in the best sense of the word. He has his own company, is passionate about what he does, and looks forward to each day's work. He's too wrapped up in his company right now to do things like hobbies, although he does run each day.
That sounds so nice. With teenagers we seem to always be busy
on Sundays. Until just a few weeks ago I could say that 5 out of 7 days we all had dinner together. Both my kids now have after school jobs. Each only work 2-3 days a week but this week the only night we will all be together is Wednesday.
Any creative ideas for keep cats busy?
My cats have plenty of toys and there are two of them so occasionally they'll chase each other around the house, but does anyone have any suggestions for keeping them busy? I just had to go throw their toys around for a while because they jumped up on the desk and started pushing things off - I guess they were bored! They are indoor cats and one is overweight. Any ideas for things they can play with and maybe get some exercise?
yes, the dogs are left outside to run around, right next to a very busy road sm
yesterday i took my son to ball practice to see if he wanted to join. the friend i talked about in this post, his mom was there. (i knew the boy played ball, that's why my son wanted to play ball too). so i told my son that we'd go watch and see if that's what he wants to do. so i'm sitting there talking with the mom and i told her that i was a little scared of my son playing football because of getting hurt, etc. that he had already had two broken bones. she said that her husband (the dad that kicked the dog), has had several broken bones, from wrecks and she said when he was younger, he used to fight (like street fighting type stuff, not boxing). but she said that he doesn't do that any more, we grow up as we get older. i thought to myself, i guess he just beats up dogs now. i'm going to check into what rescue groups are around here. it's very obvious these dogs don't go to the vet for checkups. even if there is no child abuse going on, the kids are going to think it's ok to hurt animals.
thanks for your opinions
Bicyclists on busy roads at 5:00PM
I know they've got just as much a right to be on the road on their bicycle as I do in my car, but I wish they wouldn't. If they're on a narrow road and there's lots of traffic coming in both directions, it can sure make for a traffic jam, and I worry about them hitting a rock or something and then flipping off their bike in front of my car.
I agree, mani-pedi! But that day will be busy, so make an appt if you can. nm
nm
Good church being the key phrase. Some are just a treadmill to keep you busy with "busy work"
x
I know, and if you try to explain this to the MT,
you are met with nothing but hostility..........You're not alone!
No need to explain yourself...
anyone who has kids (of ANY age) understands completely. God bless!
Sorry I don’t get it, explain.
NM
Explain, please.
x
This might help explain it
I've never had one, but this link takes you to a pretty good Q & A about it. It doesn't sound like a very bad/painful procedure. Hope this helps. Good luck.
http://www.aafp.org/afp/20020315/1167ph.html
Did you explain all of this to your son?
x
Perhaps did not explain sm
We have youth programs where a member of the department will come and talk to kids about the dangers of the internet. You know they never listen to parents, and you don't want the fact that you went in there yourself to come up. Some parents visit these porn sites regularly, not saying anyone here, but then they don't realize the kids can log on and get in there easily once they're in there if only by mistake or by surfing the web and being directed there. Perhaps some don't know the horrible crimes that come out of youths being lured by porn and the sooner it's dealt with, the better. I don't mean to have the police come in uniform with sirens and lights blaring. There are simple solutions to this problem and I am all for putting away these slime balls, some of them are judges, ministers, etc., so-called trustworthy people hurting our youths. Perhaps I misspoke but you may have read more into it. It's a common problem we all share and it could end up with a dead or kidnapped kid. I'd rather get tough early and save a life. Overreacted, maybe! I would never roll on the floor laughing about it but then again, we're all different.
You will have to explain
...how if I "get some of it" (what does that even mean?) -- If I have sex I will be more likely to abandon my principles?
If this is what you mean, it demeans you to suggest so; that in the absence of anything more intelligent, this is the best you can come up with. I think it speaks volumes about whom I am dealing with.
Like I said, I don't intend to start a revolution, all I need to do is be true to what the data show as well as to what I can see with my own eyes when watching a video of an infant getting circumcised.
It is already a movement, with numbers of infants being circumcised in the U.S. declining & more. This makes me happy. So no, I'm not starting a revolution. I'm simply doing my part to help this already existing movement along. It's all any of us can do, stay true to our convictions & have intelligent debate, & hopefully not stoop to suggest that someone "getting some" will make them see things your way.
Can anyone explain why
There are so many children being kidnapped. I understand about occults, drugged out parents selling kids for drugs and a whole myriad of other issues, but why is this happening now.
These cute sweet innocent kids are being slaughtered, yet garbage is allowed to roam the streets. I saw on Glenn Beck yesterday about some guys dog who was murdered and one guy is in jail while 3 others are still out roaming around. What is happening to our nation. Is there something in the air that is turning these people into animals.
Could somebody please explain?
I signed up for Twitter and signed up for some news feed things, thinking that I would then start getting text messages of news updates and/or links to news stories. So far (several weeks later) I have gotten NOTHING, NADA, ZIP except a couple Twitter friend requests from obvious spammers.
What exactly IS Twitter? How is it supposed to work?
Signed,
Clueless Facebook User who DID manage to get Facebook up and running but doesn't quite *get* the attraction of it all... LOL!
Well that may explain some things...
A friend of mine had a tummy tuck also and is now gaining weight in areas she never had problems with before. She was told that since along with the belly fat many fat cells were also removed the fat has to go somewhere and goes to those other areas. Honestly, I'd rather it be equally distributed if it were me. Now she has a flat *stomach* but above and below the tuck area are bulges as well as her butt and legs are getting extremely big. I hope this is not the case for you. It seems that once you have it done you basically cannot gain weight or this can happen. She is now sorry she had it done :(
How do you explain the difference between...
a republican and a democrat to a teenager?
How are you going to explain to son in a few years why
fasd
Can you explain the sentence
I've be typing from home for a long time?
Explain my sentence...
I've typed from home since my 12-year-old was 2. Most of the time, he was right next to me. Then along came another. My hubby and I split days. He worked part-time and I worked part-time. We felt it better to not have the income and keep the children at home with us. My kids are 5 years apart. My son started school 1/2 day, so my working at home was great. Now, they are 12 and 7. I work at home full-time now and my hubby works full-time at his job. I am here for them, but they are in school all day. I am strictly an IC, so I adjust for whatever I need. I do not need the benefits, hubby has those. I do watch my children, but I have typed at home for 10 years now, and nothing too dramatic has suffered. Did I put my 7-year-old in preschool? Yes, I did. Did I have to jump up and down a lot? Yes, I did. Do I regret any minute of it? No, I do not. 
Not that I feel I have to explain anything
but they are the same age, almost 18.
You are right. I'm just curious. It would explain a lot.
xx
and now you *will explain slowly*???? sm
Now this post you just made is incredibly condescending - *explaining slowly* - as if we are the village idiots.....please leave this thread - you already took this thread down to your level of denigration....and now it's time for you to GET_OVER_YOURSELF....
I don't feel I need to explain myself to you
I was simply voicing my opinion. Geesh, I'm glad you're not my neighbor.
Explain Bunco please sm
I do not know what a Bunco party is, no clue. From what I can figure out, someone asked you to pain other peoples' toenails. That would be very insulting to me. Perhaps I am misreading something here. My experience with other females has been negative socially. There are not that many "true friends" out there, just a bunch of back-biting b------s in my town. I had someone call me yesterday just to clearly gossip. When I didn't "bite" she kept asking me if I had heard from X, Y or Z and when I didn't have anything negative to say, she sounded disappointed. I refuse to gossip, it's a downgrading, vicious habit that I refuse to get into. I consider myself a professional and refuse to do anything less. Painting toenails would be a total turnoff to me, a kick in the teath really. Then again, I don't know what a Bunco party is, perhaps it's a grooming party. No idea, so can't comment, just can relate to the back-stabbing behavior. It's something in the water around here anyway and I refuse to partake of it.
I wish I could explain this campus to you...
It is an old town with the NIU campus at the heart. The main buildings are located near a lagoon, where the whole community can ice skate and feed the ducks in the warm weather. Classes can be held in large lecture halls, while others can be held in individual buildings located within walking distance. It is not like a big high school where you can monitor the doors and have a big xray machine when everyone walks in. It is spread out over a huge area, like a small town in itself with multiple buildings. I was there today, and there are old buildings and new multiclassroom buildings and just a mixture of traditional and new structures. I just dont see how the security could be much better than it is...
Hard to explain. So sad.
Hey moderator -- please help us out here, explain to
Okay, let me try to explain this one more time
The reason the moderator bans correcting someone's grammar/spelling, etc., is because it is RUDE! You were rude to correct this woman's grammar. I did not correct your grammar; however, I did point out that you are not perfect either. Given the situation, you were rude. You can complain about it all you want, and most would agree that incorrect speech is annoying, but I don't see anyone agreeing with you that it was correct to point out the woman's mistakes to her.
I find it very difficult to believe that the moderator is going to ban anyone for doing exactly what you did to that woman. Sounds like the pot calling the kettle black to me.
Sometimes it is necessary to explain what you expect
Sometimes it is necessary to explain what you expect. Maybe he will or cannot fulfill all your expectations. But maybe he'll learn and also, maybe, you will learn that all your expectation might not be fulfilled.
Working at marriage, can you explain?
I read these posts and I told my DH yesterday we were going to have to work at marriage and he wanted to know what?? I am asking the same of the readers here. I am in my 60s, 10 years older than my hubby and we have been married for 6 years now (previous husband deceased). I am so in love with this fellow, probably for the first time in my life and he with me. I adore the ground he walks on and just think he is the best thing since popcorn. I work at my transcription job but I don't get this about marriage having to be worked at. I have grown children. This is his first marriage and he has no children. He is a hard worker as am I and we do not fight, ever. There have been absolutely no big spats at all, none. He takes the big debt and I have the smaller. We have separate checking accounts and that is fine with me but if need be we are both on each other accounts. If I want to go to dinner, the show, to visit someone, no problem and the same with him. He was our (late DH and my) friend for over 30 years and I think possibly by being his friend first of all, he is now the best hubby I could ever hope for. I never in all those years even knew he noticed me, quiet, shy, reserved, barely holding conversation with me, mostly he and the other DH. There is nothing I would not do for this man. I want to hear from others about working at marriage because I am just not understanding. Probably some of you are saying this seems impossible but I am living my dream like I never imaged I could have.
I wish all physicians would explain to patients..
that although they are prescribing a medication which is primarily prescribed for XYZ, that is has also been found helpful in treating ABC. A friend of mine who had recent rotator cuff surgery was given a new script by his pain clinic physician for a chief complaint of increased pain. My friend looked up the medication on the internet, only to find that it was prescribed for depression. He was under the impression he was given a pain medication prescription. Needless to say, he expressed his displeasure to the physician regarding this and as a result, has lost trust in him and has left his practice.
OK, I'll try to explain the ick-factor...
He's creepy...always has nude women on his show, degrades females in general, and just plain perverted. Makes my skin crawl, seriously. He makes Howard K look like an angel, IMHO...that to me is icky...
I LOVE GG and will try to explain what happened...
I'll try to explain what happened last night. Lorelai got drunk and sang a karoake song - I will always love you - to Rory, but Luke walked in and she started singing the song to him. It was so adorable that I actually cried :) Every word of the song was a perfect fit to their relationship! Anyway, Lane's husband got a lead guitar gig with some band and is going on tour for 2 months with them. She was going to go with him and bring the twins, but realized it would be too hard. Luke and April had to cancel their boat trip because April got in to some fancy science summer camp. Rory had a breakdown after getting another rejection letter from another newspaper job and thinks she will never get a job. Then at the end, Logan asked Lorelai's permission to ask Rory to marry him. It ended with him asking that, she (Lorelei) was just staring at him with her mouth open. I think that about raps it up.
We all have opinions...you don't have to explain yourself to the world (sm)
I'm sorry you are getting bashed. I did disagree with the decision, and I kind of thought you would end up regretting it. But you did involve her in the decision. If one of my kids was asking me to just go ahead and let them take the paddling, I might agree to it. You're fine. When we are on here it is so easy just to spout of our opinions - me included. But if we were all sitting face to face in an office working together talking about it, it would not be nearly as offensive. When things are in writing they seem so much more harsh. Don't be too hard on yourself.
It was hard to explain to my 7 year old
He adores Zoey 101. She is like a dream to him. He knows about having babies, but he does not know why she would at her age. He is so disappointed this happened to her. He does not know why or how yet, but he knows that he might never see her on the show again. It was sad as I watched this and saw his sadness.
Too bad this young lady did not have enough self-esteem to tell the guy "no." Or to even know that this is not good for a young girl, etc. Where's the parents and the morals. Maybe I am a dinosaur, but I was taught kids play even at 16 or whatever you may have crushes, but in my day a kiss was a big deal. Now kids are having kids (though this has happened through the ages), but someone able to be on TV and the movies would have a better education about saying no, and or at the very least birth control. As it is my 7 year old is confused, what does this mean for 16 year old girls who say no to guys and then this happens, they must be confused.
Sorry if I sound antiquated. I guess I should have grown up in a different time period.
Explain the huge difference please. (sm)
Is it between alcohol and pot, crack and mushrooms, crank and LSD? Please, explain to me the huge difference. To me, all drugs are drugs, but maybe some are more preferential to you.
Please explain how the OP is abusing this child? Do...
you know something we don't know? How have you come to that conclusion? Perhaps you need a job to keep you busy and not try to control the lives of others. You sound like a control freak....
Yes, but I never explain myself. ALL my friends are MTs. Talk about not getting out much...nm
nm
write him a letter and explain to him like you
explained it to us. Tell him how you really feel. Give him some days to 'digest' it, then give him a call.
If you have definitely made up your mind, you have to tell him before he gets out, otherwise I doubt that you will be able to tell him face to face and you will just give in.
I'm not a Bible scholar, but I can try to explain what Matthew was saying...
He wasn't saying that everyone who goes to synagogues are hypocrites. In his time, he was saying that there are some people who went to synagogues who were hypocrites.
Matthew's Gospel is written for a Jewish audience, or maybe I should say, from the perspective of a Jew speaking to other Jews. He is describing a situation that we still see today, people who proclaim themselves religious and call attention to themselves, but don't really live faith. In this particular verse, he describes something that his audience would be familiar with. They were Jews and they went to synagogues. They most certainly would have known people who called attention to themselves and proclaimed that they were righteous. Meanwhile, they really didn't live righteous lives.
Today we know that scenario can refer just as easily to someone who sits in the front pew at a church on Sunday, but then spends the rest of the week being evil to his fellow human beings. We also know of people who proclaim Islam, but carry out terrorist acts.
The Bible was written thousands of years ago, of course. So we have to try to think of it from that perspective, and then carry the lessons forward into the present time.
Does that make it as clear as mud? :) Like I said, I'm not a Bible scholar, but I did want to try to explain it so that you wouldn't think there was a hateful agenda hidden in the verse.
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