Now I will give you my sympathy as you did for me
Posted By: Furkids mom on 2008-01-14
In Reply to: Sweet Sasha - Misha
the other day as my baby Kitty-Kat was dying. I really feel your sorry.
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- Sweet Sasha - Misha
- Now I will give you my sympathy as you did for me - Furkids mom
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No sympathy here.
I was taken advantage of by a family member when I was very young. I blocked it out for years -- almost lost my marriage because of it. When the flashbacks came I thought I was losing my mind. I feel no sympathy for anyone who does this to a child. Speaking from the otherside of it -- you may move on, but it stays with you forever. It is a club I would rather not be a part of.
No sympathy--sm
I have read the message from the poster below reminding us that the abusers are someones child, as well. That someone loves them too. Well, love them, yes. Condone what they did. NO.
It is just my opinion that these types of people CANNOT be *rehabilitated*. It is as much within them as homosexuality is within a homeosexual person. It is not something that is *learned*. It is bred within them and cannot be *cured*.
I was, and I will use the term that was inflicted on me, RAPED...40 years ago. It is still within me. Yes. I have *moved on* and do not think about it or dwell on it...but the after effects just never go away. It has affected every male/female relationship and some friendships that I have ever been involved in. I have given up on trying to have a relationship with anyone, as my psyche will just end up ruining it. I would rather be alone for the rest of my life than to ever hurt anyone else again. The person who inflicted himself on me has nothing to bear within his soul. He will never know the kind of pain he has inflicted upon others. He just gets his *satisfaction* and moves onto the next one..until he is caught. But even then, his *sentence* can never come anywhere close to what he has done to his victim. Ever.
so. no sympathy here. That one *event* changed my life forever, but not his.
Don’t need sympathy from you or anyone here
I said rudeness, saying a person not smart enough to ask something- this is, like I said, a forum. People can and do ask a lot of different things here- not that you have to fricking use the advice! Not that you take the advice always! But, people sometimes have similar things happen in their lives. That is what I am saying. No sense in people being suck jerks!
You have all my sympathy ! Been there, done that. nm
x
A lot of people are so desperate for work that some will give you free bids and give you ideas while
nm
no sympathy, as long as they are
rightly convicted. I myself have been molested as a child, not severely, not even long-term, but it has had a PROFOUND effect upon my mental/emotional/sexual being. It took flashbacks after almost 30 years to piece it all together and understand the impact upon my life. and NO, i don't think they 'rehabilitate'. I think life in prison is the minimal most of these offenders should do. Death would be better for the more persistent and violent offenders.
not a sympathy card...
Just a congrats on your new baby and friendship, etc... No, sympathy on behalf of the baby would be totally out of order. The baby is fine except for a common foot deformity. It is correctable. No she needs a pick me up card. Something to brighten her day.
Thanks for the advice and sympathy.
It's not just the pain, but have you also had such trouble procrastinating, or when you get started, cannot keep concentration? Combine all three, and heavens it is hard to get through a day. I am a bit better today compared with yesterday, thank God.
I will be sure to try the flax oil and taurine supplement you suggested, "MT also in NC." Thanks so much.
Not looking for sympathy, in fact
I figure to get the opposite! Doesn't matter! I'm a smoker ... yeah that's right, a dirty low life scum of the earth polluting your air smoker! One of the few little pleasure I have in life. When the price of cigarettes went sky high, we started "rolling our own". It was a lot cheaper, for a while. The price of the tobacco went up, but still much cheaper than cigarettes. Well today, DH was informed at or local tobacco store, that because of a new tax hike, it will go from $9.14 a can to over $20.00 by April 1st? Ok. I'm done, let the stoning begin...
Do you have sympathy for child molesters?
Can they be rehabilitated, or should they serve life sentences?
Many people seem to have such mixed feelings about child molesters, like “Well he’s always been such a nice guy,” (duh, how do you think they convince the kids to trust them?), or “They really can’t help it.”
I personally do not have mixed feelings. I believe they should serve life sentences for the torturing of these children. I believe that 99% (if not all) cannot be rehabilitated, they are child rapists for life. In many states molesters are only charged with a misdemeanor if they fail to register as a child molester. This is unacceptable.
Please write your senators and governor and urge them to fund the ADAM WALSH ACT, which will make failure to register a FELONY and help make consistent and uniform laws for ALL STATES. Most of these rapists are not dumb and take advantage of the vast differences in state laws, hopping from state to state trying to find the most lenient laws.
The link below will take you to oprah.com to download a prewritten letter that can be sent to your representatives and links to their addresses. It took me less than 2 minutes to print all the information out, and it could help change our country.
http://www2.oprah.com/tows/slide/200702/20070221/slide_20070221_284_118.jhtml
It is estimated that 1 out of every 4 girls and 1 out of every 10 boys will be sexually assaulted by the time they are 18. Over 260,000 children are abducted each year in America. PLEASE DO YOUR PART TO HELP.
I just wanted to send my sympathy your way...
May you find comfort in the Lord.
Sympathy cards are so inadequate sm
Maybe the people who did not give you cards had a difficult time finding something and just didn't get one at all because of that. I spent a great deal of time at the store yesterday looking through cards to give a friend who just lost her 7-year-old son. They all say basically the same thing and none of them say the right thing because there is no card in the world that will bring a loved one back. In the end, I did pick one out to give the family but still feel it is woefully inadequate to express how my heart aches for them and their loss.
Need help on what to write on sympathy card for baby SM
My friends just lost a baby to SIDS. The funeral is tomorrow. Unfortunately I can't make it, but I'm sending a sympathy plant/flowers. I'm at a total loss for words. What should I write on the card? Appreciate any input.
I was just saying I think it would be out of line also to send her a sympathy card...
I AM leaving her alone. I am just asking for other insight since I don't understand this. Like have other people done this. I am not pushy. If I were pushy I would keep calling and asking to speak with her or go over. I am respecting her wishes. I haven't been over because she said she doesn't want anyone over. How am I pushy?
How important is it to you to receive a sympathy card
How important is it for you to receive a sympathy card? I know this has been quite a long time now (3 years), but still bothers me. My mom died 3 years ago and I received only 3 cards. One from my DH's aunt & uncle and my best friend sent me 2 cards. Nobody else sent me a card. My MIL, BIL (3 of them - all married), SIL, co-workers (8 of them), people in my quilting guild that I've been quilting with for years and years. None of them. I went back for the funeral and listed to my sister and aunt tell each other about how many cards they got and how much they were loved by their friends (they made it into a joke as to who was more loved by who got more cards :-) My sister got about 18 or 20 cards and my aunt got about 30. They said they were sure when I got back I'd have many cards waiting for me (I flew back 2 days after hearing of my moms death). My sister even offered me some of her cards. I came home and had just the 3 cards. My best friend also send me some "cheering up gifts". But still nothing from anyone. I never said anything to DH but it bothered and still does bother me that people thought so little of me than to send me a card letting me know they were thinking about me. The worst thing was that I always sent them birthday, anniversary, and sympathy cards to them. I even would send them sympathy cards when their pets died.
Well I'm over it, but every once in awhile I think about it and it just saddens me. So now I don't send any of them any cards for anything. Just wondered if it bothers other people like it did me.
Dating sympathy (from married person)
I would hate to go back to dating. I've been married 18 years but I do remember what single life and dating were like.
The majority of them were creeps for one reason or another (especially the one going to law school - I got my first clue when I saw a sticker inside his car - his last name is also an occupation and the sticker said _________ know all the right strokes). (eye roll)
I mentioned in another post that I had moved into an apt. with my boyfriend of about a year, and 3 weeks later, he left me for his ex-wife.
At that point, I swore off of men. I figured I'd just live in the same apartment and go to work at the hospital 5 days a week for the rest of my life. That's when my husband walked into my life.
I had first met him in 1985 when, after graduating high school, I went to work at McDonald's. He was a swing manager, 2 years older and so darned handsome. We dated for quite awhile but it wasn't exclusive. He then joined the navy and got married. Three years later, his ex told him she needed to get a life and filed for divorce.
About 3 months prior to this, I swore off men for good. Then, one day, I was working a Saturday at the hospital (I think it was to make up for the day I missed when I had a diagnostic laparoscopy - yeah, it was stupid going back to work the day after you have surgery). I got a phone call from my mom, asking me if I remembered such and such. My husband's sister had called my parents' house but my mom didn't want to give out info, so she called and gave the info to me. I called his sister and we gabbed. I told her I remembered her and definitely remembered him. She asked me to meet her and her boyfriend at a bar along with my (future) husband. Well, I said "what the heck". I agreed to go.
Now, this is 3 days status post a laparoscopy and they weren't as good about getting the CO2 out back in 1990 as they are today and that day, I had gas so bad, I probably could have filled up my gas tank 3 times over. I spent almost the entire date squeezing my cheeks together (thankfully we weren't dancing or doing other physical things - LOL). I still had a really good time but was relieved when I left his house. I lived about 10 minutes away and I swear, I must have passed gas the entire ride home.
He knows all about it now. Heck, I can't remember the last time I even closed the door to the bathroom. We have no kids and if I do close the door, all 3 pugs sit outside and scratch the door, whine and cry. I gave up. I'm sometimes even "lucky" enough to have one of them on my lap while I'm going.
Anyway, I guess what I'm trying to say is love/good relationships seem to come when you least expect them. When I pursued dating or had someone fix me up, or met a guy in a bar or whatever, it never ended well. Nowadays, how do you know if you're supposed to pay half for the date?
Like I said, I feel for you guys. If my husband dropped dead tomorrow, I think I'd remain single the rest of my life.
Good luck to all of you and God bless!
I just got back from buying a sympathy card for my brother's MIL, glad I did now. nm
x
You do not give them food, you give
the children food but if they did not have the food to eat, probably would call family and children services. I do NOT give away money to anyone.
IMO a card would not be out of order at all. Except a sympathy card, of course.
I totally agree a sympathy card wouldn't quite be the thing, but it sounded to me that the original poster of that idea didn't mean a sympathy card like one for death. I think sympathy in the sense of "hey, you had a rough time of it with this birth, and maybe things haven't been the way you imagined, but know that I'm thinking of you and I'm here if and when you need me."
I got PPD when my breastfeeding relationship didn't go right, following a birth plan that went seriously awry, and the reality of a fussy, picky baby instead of the happy, sleeping one that I had imagined.
I *did* spend a lot of time on the phone, but then everybody's different. I would have loved to get a cheerful card from a friend, however. Does anybody NOT like a card?
you should give it a try
what the post said about the wipes. maybe something all natural might also do it that way the baby might not have a reaction to that and its good for the dog also. do some research on the net if you can. its worth it before you give your other "baby" up. let us know what happens. if worse comes to worse, make sure you interview prospects very well just like a baby for adoption. hope the first one works for you :)
We would give a lot of it away, believe it or not. Then, of course, the sm
usual - pay bills, purchase gorgeous home, travel, etc.
We believed that those entrusted and blessed with much should give much. If you keep all that you have you become stagnant - like the Dead Sea. The Dead Sea has absolutely no outlet which is why everything dies that enters it. I don't think we are much different. Give in order to be happy.
Once they give me what I want, they
can do what they like but until then guess we will just have to continue to cut that massive yard. It takes us about 2 hours to get there and then spend time there just to cut. It is an all day thing.
I'm sure they have - they will give her something (or let her out) (sm)
If they let her spoiled brat behind out, I am going to be MAD.
Can't give him away--Nobody else would put up with him!
I have a big kitty (18 lbs) that acts just like that! Pulling on blinds, disturbing our sleep, doing anything and everything to get attention until he gets fed! We love him so much and know that we are the only ones in the world who would put up with him--so we can't give him away! I feed him 3 measured meals a day. Fortunately, I now live in a house with a basement, so I put him down in the basement at nightime with his 3rd meal. He cries and scratches on the door a little bit, but then he gets used to it and goes to sleep. Sometimes I have to put him down in the basement during the daytime too if he starts being too bad while I'm trying to work.
Do you have a bathroom you could put kitty in at night? Just make sure there's not too much in there for him to destroy. That would be more comfortable than a crate.
There was a give away
for me. An ad underneath said something about maze prank.
I'm going to give this a try...sm
These are my "four-legged boys".
then give him a key!!! nm
NM
Give him a big hug from me!!!!...
Whatta joyous day you guys had!  Cat
I'm not sure if I can give the name
legally, so I'll give you some facts -- It is a major department store that changed it's store credit card into a mastercard.
Don't give up on her. PLEASE don't give in to her.
She's 16, and its never too late. I just started reading this thread and my heart is broken. I hope other moms take it to heart after hearing your story. I have 3 teens, so can relate. My husband and I came from permissive families - you know, the cool family with the house where all the kids wanted to hang out? The houses where they could get away with anything, drinking, drugs, smoking, sex, cause the parents looked the other way. My parents were fine, upstanding, snobbish upper crust members of the community, fine church-going folks and rich. And they didn't give a hoot about their kids in the end, though we looked great on paper. I only wish my parents had rules. I was grown up since I was 14. My husband, too - that's how we met and have been together 30+ years now. Our # 1 rule since our own kids were babies... NEVER are they allowed to sleep over anyone's house. Period. No exceptions. Not relatives, not their bestest friend, not their cub scout troop. Need I say that we have never had 1 regret??? There is NO good reason for any kid to sleep anywhere than their own bed at night. Period. We realized when they were little that if we let them do the sleepover thing when they were little, but then stopped when they were older, what kind of a message was that? We knew the sweet little neighbor who at 5 years old demanded her friends sleep over, or else would throw a tantrum, would be 16 one day, and a tramp. Its that simple an equation these days, unfortunately. So, no sleep overs, no exceptions, not for church, especially not for church. LOL. How sick is that? But this is 2008 folks, and this is one messed up world. My kids were upset a bit when they were really young, but we didn't make a big deal of it, nor in the end did they. They are cool, mature teens, and have actually thanked us for it many a time lately. We took the temptation out of their hands - kids are too young to have to go thru this crap. I know, I did. At any rate, of all the rules I would start if I were you, I would go with the knowing where she slept at night, eacn and every night. Otherwise, look what's happened. She has lost this privilege at the very least. Kids don't need to not come home at night. Please don't ever fall for that one again. Even if she is at so-and-so's house, a friend, you must see what kind of kids she is hanging with. Don't allow it, for her sake. She will never ever change unless you do it for her. Praying for you. Be strong. She may hate you now, but she won't a year from now, or two. But at least she'll be alive to forgive you, rather than possibly dead. You know what I mean. Let your husband's European temperament prevail. BE STRICT. Being a strict parent does not kill your kids in the end, honest.
yes! and why do I have to give my
account number, name and address to a phone tree when I will have to do it all over again when I speak to a real person?
Don't give up!
I've been sewing all my life. My grandfather had a Sew N Vac type store when I was a little girl, and he used to have me and some of my other cousins come into the shop and sew during store hours to show customers that it was "so easy, even a child can do it!" I learned to sew before I even went to school! He even had some antique machines with foot pedals that we kids used to play with. I have all sorts of machines, from antique hand-crank Singers to cheap Wal-Mart plastic machines, and high-end Pfaff and Viking sewing machines and sergers.
Check out local sewing and fabric stores for classes. You can also try visiting Meetup.com, which is a really cool place to find all sorts of people who get together to pursue their interests. I don't know where you live, but I checked in my area, and there are several groups for beginning sewing listed. Maybe there are in yours, too.
With that said, I really have to tell you that Singer machines are not the best. Since the company was sold many, many years ago the quality has gone downhill. They are not built to last and have many parts that break very easily. In my experience, a simple mistake in threading some Singers will place a lot of tension on a weak part in the thread line. Something will snap or break, and once it's broken, you can't get the machine to feed thread properly as you sew.
Unfortunately, a really good machine can cost hundreds of dollars, and it's hard for a beginning sewer to make that sort of investment not knowing if it's something they'll be doing for a long while. I always recommend going to a store that deals in higher end machines. (Pfaff happens to be my favorite.) Then ask to try machines or take classes with their display machines. You learn basic sewing techniques and you learn what makes one machine better than another.
I suggest that if your machine is brand new, you return it for a refund. Take some sewing classes first, and try different machines. Then you can make a better, more informed purchase, which in turn, should result in successful and fun sewing!
I'm sorry. You probably didn't want to hear that, but I can't say that I'm a fan of Singer machines. Even if you get it to work, it's likely to fail not long down the road, which will only frustrate you. I'm willing to bet it's the machine and not you.
I just give
the roll a spin and catch the end of the paper. I've never given it a thought as to which way it should go.
Okay, I give up...
What are the mothballs going to do to the cat?
I have had the worst time with this new kitty. We have already tried the hot sauce and he actually likes hot sauce, interestingly enough.
He has absolutely destroyed my tree this year. It looks like Charlie Brown's Christmas tree at this point. (Not really but almost!)
I would give it to him. All of it. NM
x
Here's what I give a lot. s/m
Go to Lowe's or Home Depot and they have house numbers, usually really pretty ceramic ones, that you can "make" with a little wrought iron frame to put the house numbers in that will stick into the ground.
Let me give you an example of something else
You might have come out okay but when my daughter still in middle school, was going to a high school in the afternoons for violin meetings with the teacher and other students. Daughter came home stating how a big girl was trying to trip her, cursing, etc. and the teacher would do nothing about it. As a fly on the wall (along with others there) I attended one afternoon and saw exactly what my daughter said was true. The teacher terrified of this older girl, probably in the 10th or 11th and I went to the office, told them to come down there immediately. A day or so later I was in the office, heard the mother and the child in there together. The girl got 3 days dentention. Lady, this was 1 parent you would never want to follow and talk with/confront. She was as bad if not worse than the child and not the kind that would take to you in any kind of way saying anything to them or their child. You should thank your lucky stars on talking with the guy/son. This happened not lately but over 20 something years ago and the school rowdy then and still same way.
Aside from the give and take
and genetic personality differences, people's minds have been programmed differently due to experiences (and they way the perceive them due to genetics). Because of that we all view, hear, perceive through our own unique filters. (Have you ever noticed even in casual conversation how often other people misunderstand what you are saying?)
It seems that this is pretty much the root of most difficulty in getting along. Many people aren't really aware and go through life reacting to things (that trigger emotions) programmed from childhood. On top of that, people are usually quite unaware of how they affect other people.
We could get into a really lengthy discussion on this, but it would be difficult in writing. : )
Certain couples will have a lot easier time, and likely you are 1/2 of one of them Sally. Bonus!! Just make sure that your husband has the same perspective on the relationship. Sometimes one person thinks everything is glorious, but the other person is just sucking it up all the time.
Not trying to be nasty, but just mentioning that because that actually happens more than one would think.
I think a better promotion of marriage rather than saying you have to work at it, would be to say you need to be aware and care. : )
Can anyone give me the name of the very best
multivitamin on the market? I have tried multivitamins in the past and never noticed a difference, a friend told me that it had to do with what type of multivitamin that I am taking. I truly need something that is going to give me more energy than I have now. Can anyone recommend something please?
TIA!!!
I would give it all up too (except AC).
Everything is so expensive, even to watch TV cost $70 a month. That's just ridiculous.
I would love to sell everything and start over again and go simple. Have the cash to do some fun things instead of having to work all the time to keep the stuff. I would just like to pack up the car and drive cross country and not have to worry about anything.
GIVE ME A BREAK
If she can afford a Cadillac Escalade, then why is she on food stamps? This has nothing to do people who DESERVE the aid given to them in this country via food stamps or anything else. It's about the people who lie and abuse the system and YOU and I PAY for it in our taxes. Open your mind.....not your legs!!
Maybe that ESL could give a class
on "Keeping Your Transcriptionist Happy"! 
of course, most teachers would give a different
story, just as most MTs will tell you that they don't make enough to survive or they are living near poverty, but that's not really true either. Most people would say the same thing about any profession they choose.
Do you think a) they will give me my money or
b) I will have to take furniture out of their store? I bought some furniture, has been over a year ago and never got it, got the runaround, they never returned my money with my asking for the return after several months of no show. I filed a lawsuit, they would not answer, did not show up in court when told to and bottom line now the courts found they do owe me and if they don’t pay me by the 15th of this month (over $700.00) then I get to go with an officer of the court, take a big truck and load up more than what I think is enough to cover what they owe me in the first place. Do you think this is absolutely crazy for a big store to ignore they owe me and do they not care about how it will look if there is a police at their door as we cart off furniture? I would, of course, go on what I would hope to be an extremely busy day for them, say a Saturday. Needless to say when all this is over I will be calling the Better Business Bureau and word of mouth also so that no one else will be caught in their business dealings.
I would give her 2 options
Someone did this to me. I told her there were 2 options if she needed my help this badly. I told her that I do work, just from home so her options were:
1. Since it takes time away from my work, she would need to make up the income lost including transportation costs. Since I make about $20 an hour, she would owe me at least that much each time I had to drive her kid plus a transportation fee of $5 a day (gas and what not).
2. If she didn't want to pay, than she would get to take care of my kids at her house when she was off of work. If that meant she was off at 6, got home at 6:30, and still needed to do what needed to be done at home (dinner, cleaning, spending quality time with her family), she would have my kid with her so that I could work since I had to take time off to help her out. If I had to work at night, she could watch my kid (or just take my kid to work with her if she wanted her nights).
Needless to say, that made her realize that I do, in fact, have a job and she would need to rely on someone else. She wasn't willin to pay $25 a day nor was she willing to give up her nights for my child.
Used to give melatonin to my mom when
she mixed up night and day. She was going blind and she couldn't tell whether it was day or night. She only needed it for 2 weeks and was back on schedule. Her doctor told me about it back in 1996.
Come to think about it, maybe I should get some. I sleep an hour, then wide awake for 1 to 2 hours, then back to sleep for a couple minutes then wide awake again.This goes on all night long.
On second thought, I could just keep the 'puter running all night. Then when I'm awake, I can start working. That always puts me to sleep. 
I'll give it a try
1. How did you feel about your parent(s) being alcoholic? Were you embarrassed?
2. Did you ever try alcohol yourself when you were a kid?
3. (If there were arguments or other disturbances) What did you do when your parents argued? Were you scared?
4. Did you ever have any friends over to your house or were you afraid your parent(s) would embarrass you?
5. Do you drink at all now? If so, are you afraid of becoming an alcoholic?
These are all probably things you have already thought of. I really applaud your willingness to put yourself out there and open yourself up to help these young people. That is a wonderful thing to do!
Why are you not going to give it to your daughter?
I am just curious? I have done very little research on this. My DD is 14 and we have decided to wait at least another year or so and by then who knows.
Give that baby a BIG hug for me
He is adorable.
Awww, give yourself a hug from me.
I cannot imagine what that pain must be like, but my heart goes out to you.
Oh yeah... don't give up...sm
Without getting into too long of a post, here's my story... and you can do it too.
Nov 2006 I started on the treadmill, 30 mins a day, 5 days a week. I too didn't want to make ANY changes in my eating habits - I sound just like you - don't really eat that much, but enjoy the things I eat, and a beer now and then. :)
I walked five days a week without fail until about May and did lose 10 pounds without a change in my diet whatsoever - maybe even had a few extras because I knew I was exercising to help offset it.
Now 10 pounds is a lot, but I have a LOT more than you to lose, so when I figured 10 pounds in 7 months wasn't fast enough and that I'd probably die of old age before I reached the weight I wanted, I knew I had to do something else if I wanted it to go faster.
I never got motivated to exercise more, in fact still hated to do it, and didn't want to devote more time to it, so I decided to count calories. I still ate WHAT I wanted, just cut down on how much I ate - still a beer now and then, just not every single time I thought I would like one, etc.
Once I started counting calories, I couldn't believe how much I actually was eating compared to my sedentary lifestyle. Although it still isn't much compared to what I probably should be taking in, since I am pretty sedentary and don't want to exercise more, I'm okay with eating a little less, but still not depriving myself when I want a treat.
Over the next 6 months - to Nov 2007, with the addition of watching what I was eating, I lost another 20 pounds. Now that is a rate of loss that I can live with. I'd love to see the pounds melt off effortlessly, but know at my age it's going to take more work. I could crash diet as I have in the past and be there in a few months, but I've played that game before and it's not worth it.
So, I have just a few simple rules - I exercise 30 mins five days a week without fail (even though I still detest it 11 months into it!!), with holidays and weekends off - I watch calories a little closer, though am not anal about it, but I also only watch what I eat five days a week also. I give myself the weekends and holidays off like I do for my walking, but I do try to not un-do what I worked on all week, so don't go overboard either, just eat more if I want to without guilt on those days.
So basically for me - I'm losing a little slower than I would like, but I'm also only doing as much as I am WILLING to do to lose it. Like my awakening at the 7-month mark of exercising only made me realize I could do it faster with counting calories, maybe sometime in the near future I'll get the feeling that I'm willing to walk more or eat less or go to 6 or 7 days a week to speed things up a bit... but I'm not willing to do that yet.
Set realistic goals. I know from years of past experience I can do anything for the short-term, and I always end up failing in the long term - so I have chosen to take this slow, not work too hard, and really try to make it a lifestyle change over time, not *poof* one day I'm a gung-ho health food and exercise nut... didn't work before and I doubt it would work now, so I'm giving this gradual lifestyle change a chance this time, and this is waayyy longer than I've ever stuck out any diet or exercise plan in my life, so it's working for me so far.
Oh, by the way.... I have always kept up the walking 30 mins a day, but due to work stress and holidays in Nov and Dec I didn't do quite as well on the eating thing and gained a few pounds back - but that's okay, I only gained back a few (3), not the whole 30. I can live with that.... it was a small price to pay for comfort food when I needed it. :)
Do what works for you. My hat's off to you if you are motivated on the exercise thing - I STILL hate it after all this time!!!!
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