Not trying to flame you but ******
Posted By: DG on 2006-12-27
In Reply to: So Sad this Christmas - SoBlue
I think, unfortunately now it is hard for people to accept generosity. I am a single mom and if I got a card in my mailbox stating how my house looked I would think someone was watching us. I personally would be freaked out if I got a B-day card from a stranger and would probably call the police.
I know this sounds paranoid but unfortunately I am. My ex had stalked me for years until he was arrested for it and I have had my house robbed before by a neighbor 5 years ago who was arrested and put in a detention home. I don't trust anyone.
Personally, to me, it sounds like you are a nosy neighbor. How do you know when someone's birthday is?
Why not put your name on the cards so people know where they came from ?.
It is one thing if you are just doing this out of kindness but it seems like you expect to be acknowledged for it in return. Why not just make one big donation in your name instead of many little ones to people who don't even know you.
I wouldn't be depressed and want to stick my head in a hole over it. Have all these people acknowledged you prior?. Does everyone at church send you a card? You gave cards to people period. Did you expect a personal thank you from everyone? Not trying to be rude but in these times people need to be cautious.
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I am going to flame your response
for the part about not spanking. I am retirement age, my husband a few years younger and I just had this talk with an older relative on Monday. She was actually talking about her ex-DIL because she said her g'child needed to be spanked for totally out of control. My relative said if a person spanked or whipped they turn out to be abusers. I told her I do not fit that profile, neither my husband and that is exactly why the world is like it is going now. When I was growing up you didn’t have knives in the schools, guns on the streets, kids out of control and just wrecking things to wreck- people best get a clue and find out where they are going wrong before the kids completely take over.
Aim N Flame is Great!
I use it to light my fireplace, my grill, jar candles. It costs less than $5 and last a long time.
I don't want to flame you, but I want to defend us northerners
I'm from the Philadelphia area, and I was taught to write thank-you notes. My parents were poor as dirt, too. I've been to weddings in the south and have had the same experience with lack of formal thank you notes. I'm a bit older than you, almost 50, and I truly believe this is a generational issue. I haven't seen a really decent thank you note from anyone under age 40 for years. The advent of emails, text messages, etc., could be part of it. And, I wouldn't mind at all a simple email from nieces and nephews for birthday gifts, etc. But I suppose I'm very old-fashioned. I think when the gift-giving occasion is formal, then the gift acknowledgment should be formal, i.e., a hand written note for a wedding gift.
Simple civility has fallen by the wayside in recent years and in many parts of the country. Young people need to learn that saying thank you is important. How do we do that, though, if their parents don't think it's important? Those of us who value politeness know that it's rude to ask someone, "Where is my thank you note!" So we don't. We can stop giving gifts, which I have done, as well. But most of the time, the person who didn't receive a gift doesn't make the connection that the gifts are no longer coming because there is no show of appreciation. Instead, they whine about Aunt So-and-So being a cheapskate. I'm thoroughly shocked when engaged couples send out wedding invitations making specific requests for honeymoon donations or "We have all the things we need, so money is preferred." (Yes, I've received those requests.) It's appalling. It's as if they are running their own personal Jerry Lewis Telethon to benefit their bank accounts.
We've just lost "it", and I don't think it will ever come back. But if you are currently raising young children, now is the time to teach them. I love the tactful way your MIL taught you, and I will do that, as well, if the occasion should arise with my soon-to-be DIL. Hopefully, the message will be taught to others as wonderfully as it has been to you.
..divorce. That would be the only time to start with an old flame. nm
s
Go ahead and flame me now....There is not one woman I would nominate...
let alone vote for. And I certainly would not vote for one running simply because she is a woman. Women, in general, tend to be catty, jealous, use their gender to get ahead, and hold grudges much longer! No way do I want some hormonal woman making decisions that affect millions! And yes, I am a woman, and I don't feel bad about my opinion.
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