Normal. I think jealousy is involved & also that his hormones are starting
Posted By: to kick in. Watch out for the bad boy to erupt. nm on 2007-06-25
In Reply to: Normal or not? Son saying he hates h is sister (sm) - Just Mom
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Yes it is normal, your hormones are readjusting -sm
from being pregnant, your body is in overdrive to make milk, etc. I never really had any of those issues luckily as I could not breast-feed (body would just not make milk with either of my pregnancies) so I had to make formula every day, sterilize bottles, nipples, etc. Fun process to have to do every darn day. You may have returned to work too soon, give yourself a chance to be with the baby, the first six weeks is an adjustment on everyone's part. With my first child though my DH would take one night a week of feedings so I could have a night off, you need to make a similar arrangement, lack of sleep will definitely make you loopy. Many times he would come home from work and I would lay down on the couch with my daughter (when she was just a month or two old or so) and zonk out with her while he made dinner (he'd cook, I'd clean up). ---go talk to your doctor about your mood swings and find out if they are extreme enough for meds, while breast feeding you may not be able to take anything possibly or if they have any suggestions that may make your life easier that maybe you have not thought of. Find a healthy way to relieve some stress, whether it is going outside and screaming your lungs out (my favorite) or cleaning, do what makes you feel better and burns off some stress.
Yes, I'd say it is sibling jealousy - sm
I am going through something similar but for different reasons. Jess, my 8, soon to be 9-y/o, is very jealous of her younger sister who is 7, and in the last 2 years since her cancer diagnosis and treatment, etc. Jen has gotten an inordinate amount of attention due to her illness, i.e. Gifts, cards, comments, etc. She also has the most beautiful hair which grew back almost the same color (it was very bright red before) but even more beautiful than before, now it has a lot of blond highlights in it and everyone always comments on how pretty her hair is, etc. and it makes my other daughter feel bad to say the least. She on the other hand is very beautiful too with very pretty hair too though brunette with blond and red highlights, nice bod and will knock them dead in a few years, and also very smart, a lot smarter than her younger sister is-- read earlier, great speller and writer, understood math sooner, etc. BUT she is so jealous of her and has been saying lately she hates her and we try to give her one on one time but that is hard to do as it's usually just me all day/night with them and my DH has been traveling a lot for work lately, so it can't just leave one and go off with the other. I know she does not really mean it. They do love each other a lot and usually get along quite well. So when she feels out of sorts I try to give her 10 minutes of my time for some girl talk and 100% of my attention while her sister is doing something else in the house. So lately I have taken to going to her bedroom when she is going to bed for a little chat, just the 2 of us. She really likes that and Jen doesn't mind in the least that I do this, so that is good. She gets more of my time since my older one holes herself up in her room a lot and plays her DS Lite. I also try to take them out 2 x a week now during the Summer and do something fun together and they always have a blast too (did King Dominion water park today), I think that helps a lot in providing happy sisterly feelings in our case.
yo trose? What is *normal*? Normal means
*normal*? that only means one has a preconceived idea of what sanity is....
which I don't - so I have no answer......*lol*
The family is great towards me, some jealousy...
from one SIL, but hardly ever see her. My problem is with my stepdaughters, who really dislike me. Neither one calls the house, of course they only call once or twice a year,and only call him when they know he is at work. One more year of child support until she turns 21 then we won't hear from her either like her older sister. Funny how when the money stops so do phone calls!
Update on jealousy/stepkids...
Okay, the man in my life with the kids did not come home until 5:30 this morning and at 5:32 AM I was telling him that I had taken all the disrespect from him and his kids that I was going to take and that we were going to have to just end this relationship.
Don't know how long I can stick to it - but he's gone for now. And ya know what? I just feel like a weight has been lifted off my chest...
aww, sweetie, don't get your big panties in a wad..sounds like jealousy to me!
....
what's *normal*?? Normal only means one has a
Hormones
I have heard the same thing about the hormones and additives in the dairy products especially. Braum's and Shepp's milk are the 2 that I know of that supposedly have none of the hormone additives. My daughter is 9 and drinks milk/eats cereal almost every day, so I try to always buy these. She is physically mature (starting to wear bras because of her little buds showing), but she is emotionally immature for a 9-year-old, so I really hope we still have a while for this to happen!
The hormones you would have to take to SM
facilitate surrogatehood at 40 or even sooner, would put you at high risk for cancer later on. Or even shorter on.
I personally find it immoral to sell babies and that's what it is. JMO.
I think my hormones are crazy
and would love to do something about them. I am guessing the poster below who said the levels change too much is probably right.
I sure would love to get rid of the depression and brain fog I often get though!
I would rather guess it has to do with the hormones....sm
maybe excessive estrogen or progesterone or testosterone.
A kind of imbalance between the hormones.
Is she on a sort of birth control?
My hormones rule my personality
and I'm tired of it also. I have many problems with ovarian cysts, etc. I believe if you have problems like these, it is worse. I never know what kind of mood I'll be in, and neither does anyone else :) One minute I can be laughing and the next I'll be screaming in anger. There are a lot of natural things out there they say help, I have not tried any but may do that soon. Here's just one article I found....
http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/womenshealth/a/PMS.htm
Goofed up hormones after a miscarriage...sm
I have had 2 miscarriages over the past 1-1/2 years, the last being in January. Both times I had a D&C. The first time I got my period right back within a month and stayed on my normal track for periods, which I've been having for 25 years now and are calendar regular. Now since the 2nd miscarriage and D&C (at 11-1/2 weeks of pregnancy) my hormones have been crazy. I didn't get a period for 3-1/2 months and that was only after they gave me progesterone to induce it. Then I started the next month on time, followed by periods every 2 or 6 weeks, no regularity at all now.
Anyone else have a hard time with their hormones just bouncing all over the place and the body not understanding what to do with regularity anymore? My OB/GYN says this doesn't happen very often but isn't concerned yet and since I'm trying to get pregnant again I don't want to go on BCPs.
Their hormones will get to them long before the marriage bug will. nm
s
I worry about hormones being regulated - did you (sm)
have any problem with that? How long was your recovery? Thanks
the hormones from the BCPs is messing with your cycle. sm
i am a midwife so i am a "little" more informed. i would definitely ask for an u/s if your doc hasn't suggested it yet, but i would also ask for labs including TSH, free T3, T4, FSH, LH, progesterone levels. seems to me that should have already been done. definitely agree with fibroids/endometriosis ruling in or out. have you ever tried progesterone cream? not that it will straightened out your periods, but will definitely help regulate your hormones. 23 days is a very long time. i'd call her again and make sure you get your hemoglobin checked and possibly add some iron depending on your levels.
Bioidentical hormones -DHEA cream, ever used it?
Yes, perimenopause is here (yipee, huh?)! I am looking into bioidentical hormones as opposed to things like BCPs (which I have not taken in years). I am looking at being on a program of progesterone cream and DHEA at the moment from a doctor who deals with a compounding pharmacy. The side effects sound a little scary, but there are side effects for everything, right? Has anyone else used DHEA? Tell me the good, the bad, and the ugly...
Is she on BC pills? Hormones may be contributing now. Tested for food, gluten, other allergies? nm
s
Are you on hormones? Tried oil supplements into your diet? Flax seed oil? Coconut oils? Research
s
Not involved
NM
I would have never ever gotten involved with my
I only did because he accepts my biracial son and is a father to him. I guess you can say I settled. He loves me totally and completely but I cannot love him and will not marry him. ever.
And I was involved with a CASA
before for stepgchildren and personally I did not find them to be that hot. They actually played a part in giving back the children to a strung-out mother who lived off the welfare system, never worked, lazy, good for nothing but they feel like "kids should be with their mothers." Ok, so they went back and last I heard the mother was gone and the kids out on the streets, oh well you live and learn. Mothers around not always the best.
Has anyone been involved with Meetup.com?
I've been thinking about starting a meetup group to get my daughter together with other girls her age who enjoy art and crafting. But I'm a little hesitant to start one because I don't have any experience with being involved in a group this way. I really wouldn't want to hold anything at my house right away with complete strangers, that would be something that could happen later on as we all got to know each other better. I would love to hear about experiences that people have had with any type of group that has met this way. Thanks!
There's a landlord involved here?
You have rights - if he is violating the rules and/or the law with respect to noise violations he either fixes the problem or moves. Check out the law in your state.
I didn't say I was getting involved - sm
I simply told the background and asked for positive thoughts for her and her son. That's it. I'm not going to tell her what to do.
Right now I am involved in about 15 things and I'm trying to sm
find a way to cut it down to half. If you are older and you don't have small kids, then I suggest getting involved in church more. I have 3 young sons so we are constantly going from ball practice to ball practice. In between that I teach 2 Sunday School classes, attend a mid-week Bible study, have lunch with husband every Friday, work out 4 days a week, work 25+ hours a week at MQ, visit friends and family out of town quarterly, PLUS I am involved heavily in 2 other major ministries at church - Pastor prayer partners and the Invitation Team.
If that isn't enough, I scrapbook like crazy and take lots of pictures.
I also write notes to people I haven't seen in a while, or I'll just write cards to people in general and tell them I'm praying for them and that takes an hour or so.
Oh, did I also mention that I am a freelance writer for a Christian publication?
I also write material and Bible studies for our church.
I used to bowl every Thur. morning, but quit that. May take up an evening league one night a week. I love to bowl.
I am up LATE every single night and hit the ground running early in the morning to start homeschooling. The only time I have to myself every single day is after 10 o'clock every night. If I need 2 hours I take 2 hours. If I need more sleep, then I'm in bed by 10:30. I take whatever time I need for myself every single day.
Find something you enjoy and just do it. Take a class at the library. Learn to quilt. Learn to sew. Learn to play an instrument. The key is doing something you enjoy doing: cooking, reading, etc.
Life is too short to waste doing nothing or sitting around wasting time. There's work to be done!!!!!!!
guess you'd say I'm really involved!
I was close to my mother's parents as a child. They were my second parents and I probably lived half the year on their farm. I see it as being a good thing for me. My GP lived way out in the woods and never drove "to town," so they only left home to attend weddings and funerals, otherwise my parent(s) took me there.
When my daughter was pregnant, I lived 1000 miles away, but we talked on the phone almost daily. When my GD was born, I was able to visit when she was 2 weeks old and I knew I had to move back to the area. She is a manipulative person and I had long ago set limits that I would do anything for her out of love that didn't involve money, so I kept my GD every other weekend and more if asked. I supported my daughter emotionally in every way I could. If she asked my opinion, I always tried to give a balanced opinion and never interfered when my opinion was not asked, although if something came up later I would try to offer options for a situation. When things fell apart for her, I am glad I was there to catch my GD so she was not lost to CPS. I am now adopting her.
I am blessed to be a grandmother...although I hope this is the only one :)
Grandparents are not involved much. . sm
It's funny you should ask this question today. My mom, who lives 90 minutes away, came for a visit. We haven't seen her in about 4 months. My 2-year-old didn't know who the heck she was and was scared of her for the first day she was here. We only see her 3 to 4 times a year. I wish we could see her more. My dad died when my oldest was one. He had never even met him.
My husband's parents have little to do with the kids. They live 20 minutes away, and we hardly see them. It really hurts because they always have my SIL's kids. They are the same age as my kids and spend almost every weekend at their house. During the summer, they spend even more time with them. After a couple of years of this, I finally asked them why they don't ever have my kids over. They said they will try to spend more time with them. Last summer, they invited the oldest to spend one night, and the SIL's kids were there. I am giving up. Sorry this got so long. I am really sad about this right now.
Involved with grandsons
age 15 and 8.... My DH & I sold our home as did my daughter and SIL. We bought one together. My daughter could not "bear" it if something happened to us so she pretty much decided this four years ago. So far it has worked out pretty well except I can't be involved with the grandsons spiritually as they are into another "type" of spiritual organization than I. That has been and probably always will be the most difficult task I have ever encountered to share my beliefs with them. I just continue to pray that everyone will be on the right path TOGETHER in the end.
If so, and you are just starting sm
you should know that the newbies do not have first choice, and you should be ready and willing to work the holidays. People who have been around much longer have first choice, as it should be. Wouldn't you agree?
Its 20 but sun is starting to come out in OR
x.
CPS does tell if lawyer gets involved. have had every detail given to me before sm
when they were called in me for my kids riding their bikes in the neighborhood streets like every kid in the neighborhood did. we hired lawyer, refused the one on one investigation at school with the kids, and had the "meeting" at the laywers office. never allowed them in our home, but our lawyer got every detail of the report, which was passed onto us. we had the date, the name of the person who called, their address, everything.
I did try to get a consumer advocate involved
but no luck. Called 1 day and would not take my call, guess he had more important ones that day. I agree totally with you about getting a news channel involved, I just decided maybe if I went the court way might would stand a chance, knew I could go after their banking acct or garnishment if the courts on my side and it turned out that way. The price they owe me has gone up over $100 just for my court costs and now they owe those in addition to what it was in the first place. The courthouse steps is the way the county does where I purchased the furniture. We could have it at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, just as long as I retrieve what is owed.
How is it not a big deal when there are kids involved? (sm)
He has a choice - I have given him 10 years and he just does not care about my opinion. Why can he not change at all to keep his family together?
You talk like the only ones involved with big taxes
My father got killed in an accident, left me his property, I sold and for upcoming year MY taxes on that ALONE over $13,000.00. I did not fuss, I did not oh woe me- just put that money in the bank to draw interest until tax time. Know I owe and have that set aside. That does not count all the other taxes DH and I pay for the year and I sound like a grinch? Sure don’t get that remark. I am as much into keeping all that I can but EVERYONE (unless on welfare) has to pay their share, until and if they change the laws. I would be glad for any bonus he or I either one got but not happening here, so where does grinch come in?
Unless your son was involved in the incident, they probably would not inform you.
If the schools had to inform all parents of every single incident that occured between students, that could be a full-time job unto itself for 2 or 3 people in some schools. It sounds like the school took proper measures in disciplining the students involved in the incident.
As far as the post below regarding the 4th grade girl and her lies, I am sure that the boy in question knew what she was saying and may or may not have told his parent(s). At any rate, that would be a matter for the families of the children involved.
Illegal and all involved should be prosecuted.
NM
apologies heal all involved --
acknowledged or not.
I am inspired.
If you care about your kids, you will be involved sm
in the drama of high school life! I am very involved with my kids and their "drama" because I am a good listener and care about what my kids have going on in their life. I am there to listen to them and give them advice. Isn't that what parents are for?
I would throw the son a b-day party and if girls came, they came. If not, you can still have fun with just the boys. Do a campout for them. Sounds like the girl needs to get a life and get over it! She is just jealous.
Does not really matter why, especially if there are children involved
x
I actually am starting to feel better, and
I really appreciate the prayers. I still have not heard from my brother, though he promised to call me. However, even though he and his family are going through a terrible time with the loss of his wife's mother, at least she has now said that she thinks they should make the long drive and visit us. That will be wonderful.
LOL! I also go to the gym every day before starting work
It gives me tons of energy so I don't need as much coffee!
I am so tired of being fat, I am starting something soon
I am glad to see your post because I am having trouble getting into those size 20s and I am not going any higher, that is too high like it is. I have some problems that I am sure are associated, the main 1 now being incontinence and I mean it is not just a little. My blood pressure is a little elevated and I am sure that would come down with the loss. My feet also give me some problems, probably tired of carrying all this extra stuff. i had heard some about this and glad to know available right up the street. Thanks again!
That's how i'm starting to feel
That's exactly how my hubby wants it. I ALWAYS have to be the one to initiate sex and he will either say things like he'll do it just do i'll hush which ticks me off or he'll flat out turn me down. I told him the other night that he doesn't have to worry about me ever bothering him for sex anymore b/c i get tired of his little smart comments about how i bother him and he's gonna start doing it just so i'll be quiet. that just makes me so mad. so i'm not gonna say another word. we'll see how long he'll go without it.
Girl, you got THAT right! I was starting to wonder
if MTStars wasn't an MTSO 'feedback' (i.e. 'spy') vehicle for ADHI and the like. Still possible, I suppose, but to be able to be a bit nasty & sarcastic (when it's deserved) is truly cathartic. Then we can get back to work with at least a small bit of relief from the annoyance lots of us feel at this profession
Don't know what starting this p-ing match
It's pretty funny really, because I never thought agreeing with another poster would get anyone so fired up. I have friends and family that I can depend on, but there are things I expect my husband to do for me that I would not expect from a friend or even my family.
I think if I would end up widowed, I'd have no problem being alone. I really don't know that I would want to get back into the whole dating thing again. I only stated that when being married works, it works well.
However, I get a definite hostile vibe from you, which I really don't understand. I don't know you, I don't know your situation and if you say you're happy, that's fine. Just don't try to make me feel like an incomplete human being because I say I'm happy being married.
Yes, me since 2006, so I'm starting
to be an old pro at trying to make ends meet. Hang in there. I doubt it can get any worse????
I've been the main support for DH and me since 2006. I'm tired of doing it but have to keep going. A lot of times, I would love to take off work for a day and/or just "retire" but it's impossible. I am now working 7 days a week instead of the 5 days just ot make up the difference in pay checks.
We're all in the same boat this year. It can't get any worse, I hope. At least, hubby's pay did take care of the mortgage and taxes for this year but we have no idea what will happen next year. He doesn't even know if he will have a job to go to, but is looking into other possiblities 'cause around here, there are no jobs.
I think the honey is starting to help....at least (sm)
it is temporarily soothing. Thank you all for your suggestions
My understanding is that both parties involved are black. nm
x
Since there are kids involved, I'd think long and hard (sm)
about leaving him. It's quite easy for others to tell you he needs to be dumped, but they sure won't live with the aftermath.
Take the 100k and remodel the house. Forget adding on. Spend the money on creating a fabuous kitchen with hearth room, fix structural defects, redo the kids' rooms; totally redecorate exactly the way you want with no regard to his taste, and get a nice new minivan to haul the kids around to play dates.
Oh, spare a little money to build a bedroom in the barn. He loves the yard and barn so much, he can live there.
See, this way if you stay and work on your marriage, you'll have a beautiful home you can live with. If his selfish ways finally push you beyond tolerance and love for him, you'll have a great house to put on the market. With your half of the sale, you'll finally be able to have the home you've always dreamed of. It's a win-win for you.
That is precious. It really is. Too many husbands not involved these days! nm
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