No budget, but don't really buy gifts.
Posted By: sm on 2007-11-06
In Reply to: Holiday budgets - do you have one, keep one and ....sm - Holiday inquiry
Hubby and I only give gifts to people we live with. Which means, we give gifts only to our children. But even for the kids, we don't focus on the gifts. They each get about three gifts and a stocking. Everyone is nearly grown now, ages 17, 18 and 20. DH and I haven't exchanged Christmas gifts in over 20 years. We simply go out and spend time together during the season. We'll have a really nice dinner somewhere, or go to a show, something like that.
I've tried very hard to stay away from the materialism at Christmas. It's just not what it's about.
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Budget??
 What is your price range?????
According to DH, our budget is $1,000
But more likely I'll spend about $1350. We have 3 kids. We usually get them 1 big gift to share and then round it out with smaller gifts. This year, they're getting a trampoline. It'll probably run around $400 and then about $200 on individual gifts.
The breakdown of the other $350:
Parents $150, Grandma $25, Gift Exchange $60, Siblings (from my kids $20, Niece/nephew: $40, Teacher Gifts $30, Student Gifts: $15.
The remaining $30 will go to Toys for Tots! Each of my kids like to pick out a $10 gift to put in.
I have 3 siblings and 1 that's married, so we all put our names into a drawing and buy each other a $30 gift. My brother that's married also has 2 kids, so our kids exchange gifts. Of course, my 2 unmarried siblings also buy small gifts for my children, so we always get them a little something from them -- usually lottery tickets or a gas card for Sheetz. $10 used to fill 'em up, but now it'll probably just buy them a hoagie and chips. We do our exchange party on Christmas Eve. It keeps the kids entertained and gives them a little "preview" of what's to come. I have to say I enjoy Christmas Eve more than Christmas Day. It's so much more relaxed, not as much work (we order pizza and wings), and the kids aren't as tired since they didn't get up at the crack of dawn.
Teacher gifts kill me. It's hard to find something nice for under $10. I usually go for a coffee mug with a Christmas scene or teacher saying on it and fill it with candy.
Of course, DH thinks I do all this for Christmas for $1000, but why tell him and spoil it? We do a Christmas Club for $1000 every year and I just buy the other stuff here and there.
We already got our Christmas gifts for ourselves -- a 46-inch LCD TV for DH and a Dooney & Bourke purse with matching wallet for me.
Now you all got me excited again about shopping next week. I've got my list ready and haven't cashed my Christmas Club check. I always wait until the day before Thanksgiving to do that so I know I won't spend it on anything else.
For those of you below who posted that you don't shop on Black Friday. Let me just say that I don't go out early for the best deals -- but rather just to watch the chaos of it all. I sometimes snag a deal or 2, but I learned a long time ago not to wait until Black Friday to get the most sought after items. Best to get them in Sept or Oct. 
How much is your Christmas budget? sm
Our family budget is $1000 and that covers gifts for 19 people, including "Santa" for the 2 kids. What about your house?
Christmas Budget
We usually spend about $300 on each chlid (2) and we don't have too many more people to buy for so it's hard to estimate how much more we spend on the others. Of course having a 12 year old that wants all the big ticket items this year, it gets kind of tricky.
I don't make a budget.
Only have 3 children and a very small extended family to buy for. I doubt I spend over $600 between them all.
Need to set up a budget for my 22-year-old DD.
She really overspends in this area and I need to show her how to manage a little better and about sacrifices. Bills first and then play. With the gas prices on the rise it is going to be tough having any left over.
You said budget? Do not think inside WDW
is for the budget minded. Maybe I am wrong but even eating in the park is $$$ most of the time. I would only stay inside the park if only going to WDW because of the fact you get to start earlier than the outside group and have maybe a few more perks. Lots of motels outside Mickey land offer buses that take you back and forth to the park. Oh, BTW, I am in my 60s and I have not outgrown Mickey and Minnie yet!
Christmas budget....
I never spend a lot at Christmas. I have one daughter to buy for and 2 nephews (a new one this year!). Other than that, the rest of the family members get something handmade. This year they will be getting wickless candles that I make and sell to sit on warmers (they got these and warmers last year) and I'm also embroidering flour sack towels. I'm hoping to find an iron-on pattern to fit each person. My family and my boyfriend's family love anything handmade and it really saves me. Plus, I hate to buy them something that they probably won't use or don't need. As far as the nephews, I will probably spend about $30. For my daughter, I pick a few things off her list and that's all she gets. I think this year is going to be a little more than usual for her, probably around $400, only because 1 of the American Girl things she wants is retired and I have to get it off eBay! My boyfriend and I do not buy for ourselves, but we may get another game or 2 for the Wii. For my daughter's teachers, last year we did candles and they went over well, so I'm doing that again. :)
we always vary the budget
We have no discipline. If we have a good year or bad year it shows. Sometimes the kids remember the bad years, but so do the grown ups!
Tell her they are on a tight budget and if she wants those people there
she can pay for them ;)
Our standard budget gathering is
meatball sandwiches, pasta salad, green salads. If I'm in the mood, I'll make the meatballs myself, but it's easier to buy bags of them from one of the big box mart type places. The giant cans of Don Pepino's spaghetti sauce are really good and cheap, too.
Has he ever had to live within a budget? Truly supported himself w/o sm
mamma's help? I would take a very hard look at my marriage with this man. If he is controlling now (and controlling where you go and how you spend IS control), this will not change. Financial carelessness is a serious issue; you will be saddled with his debt for many years if you are not careful. Do go to Suze Orman's website and/ or get some books by her from your library; I recommend "Women and Money".
It sounds to me like your warning bells are going off. Please listen to yourself and don't get burned. Take care and give us an update.
they always request more to cover what others don't send - plus what their budget won't buy -
x
My lunch-budget is however many lines I miss when
I don't keep track either. Poor budget planner. Spend way too much - around $2k. nm
x
the poster is seeking advice on lodging, on a budget
nm
Make a list of budget/spending priorities for your self employment income
Dave Ramsey's book has a irregular income planning sheet. Basically you list your expenses with the cash flow sheet. With any steady income you allocate it. For irregular income, make a list from the cash flow sheet of what needs to be paid first. Keep a culmulative total.
16 yo gifts
some ideas: A set of weights and a jumprope for working out,a gift card for tunes for his ipod, the complete set of all Rocky movies. My 15 yo is an athlete too and works out constantly. He loves our weight set more than anything.
I appreciate all my gifts. sm
I wear what I don't like. I set out for all to see what I don't like as well. I use everything whether I like it or not. I never put anything in the closet that I get. I never take anything back. I only exchange what doesn't fit for what does. I believe that if someone is nice enough to take the time to get me something, then I should take the time to wear/display it. JMHO.
If it says no gifts
then I don't take a gift. If you want to give her something privately at another time, you could probably do that.
no gifts
Will this be a high-end catered party or could you help the hostess with all the running around to different stores picking up ingredients, cake, decorations or prepping in the kitchen? I would honor the no gifts request. Cat
No gifts
How about a donation to her favorite charity in her name? You wouldn't be giving a gift per se publicly but she would probably appreciate the gesture.
re: no gifts
AWWWW get a gag gift then! Thats what we've done for friends of ours. A friend of ours was turning a bit gray when he was turning 40 and so we all showed up with white hair spray paint in our hair to tease him. He laughed and said we were all cruel! LOL funny thing is now mine is gray!!! lololol
gifts..sm
How many in your office? Are you the PR person in the ofc with the budget from petty cash and going out to buy all the gifts? If that is the case, I would suggest getting everyone Kooshballs in different colors. Who can't resist a new toy on their desk? Just don't peg anyone in the eye when you have your Kooshball fight!  Cat
Gifts...
Package of mini-Sharpies, they come in different colors; gel pens; Post-It note cubes, there are some cute snowmen, Santa ones; gift card from video store; ornaments.
No more gifts!
Sick of all of it, going to spend my money where it's needed, no more "stuff". Plenty of others out there who really need it. Been there!
gifts
There are complicated metal puzzles that are not expensive, but are very entertaining for adults and teens. I have also found extravagant adult coloring books. I think that times are changing and in the future there will be less emphasis on gifts, but for now strange and unexpected can be just as good as expensive.
http://www.mindwareonline.com/MWESTORE/Home/HomePage.aspx?&SG=PMDG1
Set my budget a year in advance, save all year and
nm
Did everyone like their Christmas gifts or are there any you don't like? sm
I like all of mine except for the one my stepdaughter insisted that she get for me. It's an Italian charm bracelet and while it has a bunch of cute charms on it, it's not really my style of thing to wear. She ended up spending almost $4 00 on this thing because a lot of the charms were custom made or special order items, all bought on eBay, so I'm stuck with this piece of jewelry. My husband tried telling her that I wouldn't care for this type of thing but she thought I'd really like it and talked him into not receiving a gift from her so she could get this for me. Maybe it'll grow on me over time.
The other gifts, including those of jewelry from my husband, are things I like and will enjoy using around the house or having.
What I did - Christmas gifts
The year after I got a vacuum cleaner for Christmas -- I picked up several things that I wanted -- clothes, jewelry, perfume and wrapped them and put them to him and when he unwrapped them I told him his present was to see me in these things, or smell the perfume, etc. I also got him a few things for the house, ie. towels and low and behold that was the last time that I did not receive something personal for Christmas. They really do not understand and unless we communicate to them and accept the treatment it will continue.
Yes, you need 2 separate gifts - sm
I have not been to one of these in so long I do not remember. I generally went with something more personal with a bridal shower gift but we are talking about best friends, and then something for the 2 of them with a wedding gift. You can always give money for both though. Surprised though they are doing a shower, they should have everything they both need by this time in their life. Maybe some nice kitchen towels or knives or something of that nature if you do not want to go personal; for the wedding gift maybe a gift certificate to a local restuarant (something useful you know they will use). If you do not attend though, you do not have to send a gift though a card would be the nice thing to do.
When it says no gifts, I always take a card. nm
!
Iraq gifts sm
Again, cannot emphasize enough the importance of these guys and gals giving their lives so we can live free. Just imagine some terrorist knocking at your door! Gosh, these guys are OUR guys who are offering their lives for us, and will not ask for a thing. The operative word here is NOTHING, is which they ask for. Let's send them lots of SOMETHING! My opeative word is FIRST which is them. Let's get some dialogue going. No negative postings please! Let's just emphasize our GUYS AND GALS who will not be home for CHRISTmas!!!!!!!! I'm ready to give, are you?? Only legit please, we have a brain!
Guy/Girl gifts
We have this every year with one side of family. Last year I bought the girl gift that everyone was wanting!! JCPenney was having a sale of the hair care products and I bought Biolage brand of shampoo, conditioner, hairspray, etc.... it was buy 2 get 1 free. So they got 6 things for less than $40. Guys we have done golf course passes, movie tickets, sports stuff and restaurant gift cards.
Opening gifts
I don't have kids, but when the nieces and nephews on one side open gifts, it is this chaotic scramble, everybody opening at once. That's not how we did it when I was a kid, or on my side of the family today, and I really feel it cheapens it. I don't get to see these kids often, and it would be so enjoyable to have each one open a gift with the rest of us looking on, to see the reaction, talk about the gift, hear the thank-you at the time the gift is received so they comprehend who gave them what. Otherwise, what's the point? Might as well just bring in a dump truck and dump a bunch of stuff on them. I want interaction, not noise.
Is that so wrong?
Silly gifts....
My hubby tries! He got me 2 pair of socks and a pair of slippers! He did not read the package the socks came in....They were for foot odor! Haha I won't let him live this one down for a while! He made up for that with an iPod docking station though! As far as food, I am sooooo stuffed I cannot eat another thing. I am still playing with my kids' toys. The toys out now are so much better than the ones we had growing up! 
funny gifts are the best
We used to do an adult exchange gift for no more than $5 and we had more fun with that than anything else, it was amazing what we could come up with for 5 dollars. Some cheapskate refused to participate because they thought it was a waste of money, so we stopped. I still have most of the gifts and won't regift or throw them out, they make me laugh when I need one. One of my faves is the 20 foot yacht, a small plastic boat with 20 little plastic shoes.The last one I got was an ornament of the leg-shaped lamp from Christmas Story.
Already got my husband's gifts
I got him a nice new pair of shoes since he is on his feet all day at work as a nurse (some new Nike Shox), as well as a couple of Wii games that he has been wanting. We will also probably go out to dinner since he is off for Valentine's day.
Appreciation for gifts
Do you have your children (let's say over the age of 8) write thank you notes or call to say thank you when they receive a gift? I have always tried to make sure my child knows the importance of the small gesture of saying thanks when receiving a gift. Of course I have never made the child write a stack of 20 after a birthday party but when receiving a St. Patrick's day card with money from his Aunt or grandma....an extra special gift because he did well in sports or school...things of that nature I have made a point for him to say "thank you" in some way to that person. I am a little hurt that my sister has not once had her children call to say thank you or send me a post card, a picture/drawing, nothing. I know that I am very old fashioned and martha stewart-ish so just wondering if I'm a little loopy on this topic or if others do this too.
Baking gifts
Do any of you give baked goods during the holidays? What are some of your favorites? I get tired of making the same ole bread, cookies, and chocolate covered pretzels every year.
I will say that last year I put peanut butter between 2 Ritz crackers and then covered them in baking chocolate (white and semi-sweet) and they turned out really well. I put sprinkles on the white ones (they showed up better than on the semi-sweet ones).
tricky gifts
Whatever your specialty is in a nice bag or basket.
Coffee mix recipes with chocolate and cinnamon are good. I made chocolate dipped plastic spoons and those came out good too because you can use really nice chocolate.
There are a lot of ideas out there!
Christmas Gifts
We have two daughters 5 and 14. It's harder with the 14 year old because now she wants all the high end gifts. We usually spend about $300 per child and we're probably going to do about the same this year. Luckily they're about the only people we buy for any more. If we had a lot of family members to buy for it would probably be a lot less. Now that the nieces and nephews are older and some married, we don't get them gifts and the few relatives we do buy for we usually don't spend a whole lot. My husband and I already got our Christmas gift for each other, a big flat screen TV so we're basically done with ourselves too.
we don't exchange gifts either
We stopped exchanging gifts about 30 years ago. When my husband and I first approached the subject, we met with some resistance, but we stood our ground and said we would not be buying gifts. My husband is the oldest in a family of 7. By the time they all married and had children, the number could have been quite staggering to buy for. I was a surprise baby, my sisters being greater than 11 years older than I am, so when they began their families I was too young to buy anything to buy for them and so never started doing so. Now both of our families agree the holidays are much more enjoyable without the stress of the gift buying, worrying about what to get, how much, will the like it, can I afford it, etc., etc. The true gift of Christmas is the love we feel for our families and all we ask is time with them, and everyone agrees on this. We usually bake or take small treats to the families are who have misfortune of spending Christmas at the Ronald McDonald House in our city due to the illness of a child. Often the other kids in the family (the healthy ones) get lost in the shuffle of caring for a child with cancer. There is no gift one can give as great as giving and bringing joy to a family in such a situation. Anyway, my point is that there may be others in the family who will feel the same way, that it is just too stressful, and you may find that they will appreciate the holidays much more if the gift stress is taken out of the equation.
I should add here, I do buy something for my own children but usually one or two things and my grandchildren because, after all, Santa still comes (!) and I do think Christmas gift giving is for children. Watching my little ones open is a gift a truly a fun thing to do and makes me happy. I do ask my kids not to buy for me or my husband because they have young families and can't afford the extra money. I have always told them I would rather they spend time with me any day then go out and buy a gift.
I have 2 gifts that fit this bill.
Back in the 80s my mother made 2 quilts, one side silky and the other side imitation fur. You talk about warm! Have used those since. The best gift ever was not Christmas but my husband (actually called first to make sure ok) and then bought me home my 2 tuxedo cats- they were really small when he first got them but they have grown into big lovable guys. One a Christmas and the other just a gift. I am blessed.
I have 2 gifts that fit this bill.
Back in the 80s my mother made 2 quilts, one side silky and the other side imitation fur. You talk about warm! Have used those since. The best gift ever was not Christmas but my husband (actually called first to make sure ok) and then bought me home my 2 tuxedo cats- they were really small when he first got them but they have grown into big lovable guys. One a Christmas and the other just a gift. I am blessed.
senior gifts
Not sure why, but a senior once told me they love getting writing paper and postage stamps.
Puppy gifts
Training pads - and plenty of them!
Gifts and celebrations
Mine is 24 and still lives at home while at college...I stopped inviting the whole family last year but my inlaws and sisters still celebrate with us and any member of our family is welcome. My bil's significant other asked me a couple years ago when we stopped giving Christmas and Bday gifts, 18 was good wasn't it and I told her that I would give gifts as long as I wanted to do but she was free to do what she wanted, last year she asked my sil the same thing and got the same response.
Gifts from the kids on Mother's day??? (sm)
This is one that I never understood. Do you have very little children?? I raised my kids by myself and they never had a dad around to make sure they got gifts for me. They made things in school when they were little. Then as they got a little older (like even just 6 or 7) they would say they didn't make anything in school that year, and I would tell them, well then it would be nice if you make breakfast or supper for me! They always did it themselves, and I ate whatever they made. I just never understood buying something for your kids to give your wife. It's the kids' mother, not the husband's.
gifts are Never to be expected--what happened
Food, clothing, shelter and love is expected. Gifts are superlatives to life, not an expectation or the receipient will lead a disappointed life. JMO
Shower/Wedding gifts
The only time that I give money or a gift card as a gift is if I am traveling to the wedding and then it is just easier than trying to pack a gift, get it through security, etc. When I take a gift, if it is something that is duplicated or something the couple does not want or need - I leave it up to them to return it - I let them figure out where it came from and how to return it with no gift receipt. Today's brides and grooms are a bit too greedy and ungrateful for my taste - I can't count how many thank-you notes I have never received - so I make them work if they want a return - which now days usually cannot be for cash.
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