My response to your responses, etc.
Posted By: Can't figure it out on 2007-10-03
In Reply to:
First of all I am glad so many of you used this board to share your feelings on this issue of hating cats. I have read each one of your posts a few times over and agree wholeheartedly. I have also felt that this issue goes a lot deeper than not liking something with 4 legs and a tail that meows. That is why I brought it up. It is frustrating to say the least and something I could never understand.
Some of the people I have come in contact with who make these remarks will also out of the other side of his or her mouth proudly state how they love animals, just not cats. The last time I checked a cat was an animal. I can certainly understand having favorites, we all do. What I don't understand is selective animal loving.
One of you posted that you feel these people are missing something. That really hit home with me and actually brought me to tears. I have missed so much in my life having no children, etc. I used to get angry over circumstances I could not control and actually felt I was being punished in some way. All around me are people with what seems to me to be everything. One thing God made sure I had all my life is the ability to love and receive it 100 times over from animals. It has literally been life saving for me. There is a history of abuse in my past, and this is one love I am not afraid of.
The post that spoke of cats being looked at as evil, the black cat at Halloween hit home, too. That post opened my eyes to a lot of things. My friend I spoke of who went shopping with me and shouted all day long about hating cats said that her mother doesn't like them either. It really does seem to be an attitude that in many cases has been passed down to the next generation. My mother, 90 years of age now, has always and will always have a spot in her heart for cats. She loves them dearly, but because she has dogs who don't tolerate cats she does not adopt cats. My grandmother as well loved them.
I guess when I see a cat I see an animal with elegance and beauty, an individual little soul that walks and cannot be heard or peeks between the railing of my niece's stairway and then very gingerly comes downstairs to sit by the front door. No one can expect everyone to love them, but the one post that said hate is such a strong word says it all. One post said how cats kill birds, etc. I don't like that either, but it is instinct. My friend had an English Springer Spaniel some years ago and called me crying, saying her dog was a MURDERER! She said she looked out the kitchen window and saw Daisy shaking a little rabbit. The rabbit died and Daisy went on her way. It is animal instinct, and nature can be very cruel sometimes. My mom sat at the living room window 4 years ago and saw a snake come over the roof to get at a bird nest we had been watching. We were anxiously awaiting the flight of the babies. It never happened.
Some don't like cats rubbing up against their legs, etc. I guess I could never hate anyone or anything that was just expressing love to me. I value what some others hate, and that's part of life too. I am not preaching, just letting some feelings out and learning a lot at the same time.
In my local shelter just a few miles from my apartment by last count about 5 weeks ago there were 500 cats waiting for adoption, and yet down the road from where my mother used to live year after year appears a sign in the front yard a few times a year . . Free Kittens. Like me, so many live in apartments, etc. that do not even allow pets.
Thanks again for letting me open up and let it out. It has helped, and hearing your comments has helped to understand a little better. I have a few little stickers on my dashboard that says it all. It is from the ASPCA. It reads very simply
We Are Their Voice.
God bless you and God bless all animals.
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Thanks for both responses!! sm
And I think one of you emailed me with the explanation (thank you for that email), and I so appreciated both posts too. Thanks again! Happy New Year too!!
Thanks for the responses...
Thank you all for your responses. I have to say that I'm a little shocked by some of the comments, but I I didn't post everything.
I didn't actually prevent my child from talking to her. My daughter answered and handed it to my son, and then he proceeded to answer all of her questions about where we were going and what we were doing and what I got him for his birthday.
I didn't put them in the middle or tell them how I felt about it. I felt like she overstepped her boundaries, but I decided to post my feelings about it on a public message board rather than say anything in front on them. I decided I would get some unbiased opinions here before I said anything to anyone. The last thing I want is to put them in the middle or hurt them.
I've decided that I'm going to e-mail my ex and ask him not to give my phone number to other people without my permission and leave it at that.
I do feel that I haven't been a vindictive or jealous ex spouse. #1 entered the picture right as we were separating, and my kids were really, really angry about it. My kids saw us as still married and just fighting, so they did not want anything to do with #1. In fact, they planned this Parent Trap type sabatoge. I caught them packing worms and slugs in a jar, Ex-Lax, and bubble bath that they were planning to put in her shampoo bottle. I sat them down and told them that they were under no circumstances to sabatoge #1. I told them that they were to treat her with respect even if they didn't like her, just as they would treat a teacher that they didn't like. I also told them that she was not the cause of our divorce, and that they didn't have to hate her. She was around for a while, and the last few times the kids came back saying, "She says all the same stuff to dad that you do, but she screams it at him." Then she disappeared. Despite the fact that they didn't like her, they still had a hard time with her disappearing without a formal goodbye.
#2 and #3 were just one-weekend things. My daughter was actually devastated because #2 had a daughter that was her age. She was excited to go back and play with the daughter and was already telling people that she was going to have this really cool step-sister, but by the next visit he was already on to #3.
There were 2 more that he dated that I was aware of, but neither wanted to meet the kids, so the kids don't know about them.
Now we are on to #4. I'm upset that his family has stopped calling and sending cards and gifts, and #4 seems to be the replacement. The second time they met her, he flew the kids to her house for Christmas, and there was no contact whatsoever with his family, although they sent gift cards to my home for the kids. Now my son's birthday came, and his family ignored it, but girlfriend is calling.
My kids always describe going to dad's house like getting on a roller coaster, and coming home as getting off the ride. So, when she called, I guess I felt like she was encroaching upon my kids' drama-free zone.
Wow! Thanks for all the responses!
Very helpful. I have ordered the BioSpot since it seems to have the same ingredients as Frontline and is much less expensive. That's interesting about Advantage losing its effectiveness. Years ago, it worked great on my cats.
Thanks for the responses!...
But I still think I want to do it. I actually did this when I was 12 from a neighborhood mom and it took a lot of the bigness out of my hair. I usually cut my own hair but have wanted to do this for so long. It's past my shoulders and want to cut it to my necklace line with a style I saw on a hair site. I researched this at hairboutique.com and found tons of information on straightening so feel a little more informed. Thanks for responding, though! I was beginning to think everyone on the board had gorgeous straight hair! :-) I'll let you know how it goes!
Thanks!
Thanks for all the responses.
I'm soon headed to the fragrance counter to do some sniffing!
thanks for your responses,
it brought up some good points . . .
I want to thank you all for your responses (sm)
I really appreciate you all for coming to my aid. I just finished a 13 hour day and am going to walk away from this machine until 8:00 a.m. and try not to think about work. I actually managed to get a good amount of sleep last night and I did feel somewhat better today. I can still feel it in the background but it is manageable. Like most of us, I know I work too much and I am trying to find a way to cut down. Thank you all again. I truly appreciate all your responses.
Thanks everyone for your responses (sm)
It was the fact that he told me this at night, while his sister was sleeping, not something he said to her in the heat of anger, that worried me. He tends to be a perfectionist and have a very negative attitude and is very critical of himself and everyone else. It is for his benefit as well as his sister's that I need to figure out what to do about it. His friends are dwindling because of his negativity, while hers are soaring. Yet, it hurts her too, because she has to be constantly bombarded with criticism on a daily basis. I stay on top of him about it, but every day it's the same. It's so confusing because they are both raised by the same parents in the same household and I really try to be fair and give both of them equal time, etc. I will say that his sister is more demanding and he probably does crave more of my time. Their dad works so much they never even ask any more if he is coming home for dinner or not - if he shows up fine, if not, fine, nobody even asks. My daughter has friends over a lot and my son doesn't have as many over, but part of that is because he is such a perfectionist that many children he doesn't like. I will suggest one child after another to invite to come play and he will say "no, I don't like him". We are down to about two that he likes and if they aren't available, he just sulks and pouts. I don't know how I am going to get the message across to him. I have tried everything I can think of. That's why I am considering a counsellor for him.
I appreciate all of your responses
but it seems a lot are assuming that the story came from a child. I was more looking for responses based on the assumption that the scenario described is fact . . . assuming the teacher has already "confessed" and provided an unsatisfactory (to us) explanation.
Thanks again for all replies!
Thank you for you responses. Sorry it said nm
instead of my name. I am going to talk to some of his friends I think. One of our nieces is one of his closet friends. I don't want to make them feel like they are betraying him in anyway, but I had posted on here just a few weeks ago about one of his classmates died from playing the "choking game" and I know how it affected so many of his friends. I think they will be open with me. BTW, he says that what was on his page he copied and pasted from another site. Still no explaination. I also just talked to my "other" mother and she really thinks a he needs a counselor. She gave me the name of a very good one that is a Christian I will call as soon as I post this. She agrees that obviously he isn't going to talk to us so he needs to have that privacy with someone else.
I almost hate to ask this, but does anyone feel like there is a connection between depression and accutane? He just finished taking 6 months of it at the end of Feb. I don't know how long the post was on his site. It could have been there between a couple of days or a couple of weeks.
Thanks for the responses to
I'm so sorry for your situations and you have helped me tremendously to put my situation into perspective. It is not nearly as bad as I had first taken, compared to your stories, but none the less still hurtful/inappropriate and if things continue to escalate (which seems to be the trend over the past several years) I feel more confident to stand up for myself and the future of my family. For now, I think distance is the key..if I can pull it off. Thanks for sharing everyone!
THANK YOU for all of your responses.sm
I will definitely be talking to her today about my feelings of having my daughter on the 4 wheeler and how dangerous it can be. I know she would never intentionally hurt my daughter, but it's just not a good idea to have her on one at such a young age. I will have to choose my words very carefully with her, but I think I will be able to get my point across. I would hate to keep her from spending time with my daughter, but if she continues to put her in danger, then I guess I will have to be there at all times. Thank you all for giving me the confidence I will need to do this! :)
Thanks for the responses!
nm
TY everyone for your responses.
Since we'll all be doing this again in a few weeks for Xmas - I now know what to do !
Thanks for all the responses! sm
They are not financially strapped, just too lazy to cook a big meal. I love the idea of telling them I am having another dinner the next night and cannot spare any leftovers, but they are welcome to take home the remnants of the 2 pies they brought over. Love it! This will be a new holiday tradition at my house!
thank you everyone for responses.
looks like there is really not that much in PO. I am currently in Nebraska. No snow yet, but super super super cold. Wish I were in Mississippi or Washington!!!
Thanks for all the responses!
I feel normal! Yay!!! Most of the time I do wear nice PJs. My husband doesn't care what my "work clothes" look like. Yes we have that joke too. lol He actually says he loves to come home and see me in my PJs. I do take a shower every day after my 4 hour morning shift but I don't wear makeup or do my hair. Maybe blow-dry when its cold but my hair is pretty easy anyway so I never do much with it unless we have a formal event to go to. If I know I will be running to the store or something I get dressed and put makeup on but change back to PJs asap. It's just so much more comfortable.
Thank you for your responses
for those of you who replied. I really hope this mother doesn't come to regret her actions.
Thanks for the sweet responses!
Off to get tights and slippers, I guess:-)
Thank you all for your responses. I did Google this sm
and didn't find too much. I did find some support on holistic sites, though, about Hartz products and other people saying their dogs have become sick on other once-a-month flea meds. It might be too early for people to make the connection.
Thank you all for your responses. Healthy pets for all!
Thanks to all the responses. This is a #2 problem she did.
conflicting treatments - go figure! Well, I think she will do fine. I have put a temporary litter box where she "went" and filled her regular litter box with fresh litter. She only did this once, but I was afraid it would be a regular thing. She is almost a year old and we cannot keep her in. She loves it outside.
Thanks for all of the nice responses!
I have really no major medical problems with diabetes or hypertension. I am lucky in that sense. I just feel like I got started off on the wrong foot by being so heavy. I feel like I am doing something cruel to my baby. I have major issues with my weight and it is so hard right now, especially being pregnant. I guess I just need to try to work on it but it has been like this for years and I just don't see how I am going to change it overnight. But I really do appreciate all of the responses and I will keep everyone updated! Thank you all! It has meant a lot to me!
Thank you for all your responses and words...
...of encouragement! I've always been strong and considered myself to be a 2-legged workhorse, often out lastingmore limber 'kids' and even men when it comes to doing heavy-duty tasks, so to be completely worn out after only a few minutes of mildly strenuous activity is a major bummer to say the least.
When I say 'crippled up' I guess I mean more stiff and sore than physically crippled wtih limbs and joints I can't straighten out. However, the pain is so bad I can't even get out of bed without almost falling down and the snap, crackle, and pop when I move around first thing in the morning can even be heard by my husband.
I do sleep like a log though...nothing wakes me up...I'm down at 10 p.m. and up at 7--and only because I have to pee, otherwise I'm sure I'd sleep until almost noon. I used to only need 6-7 hours of sleep a night and was a morning person...the annoying kind who could jump out of bed, get dressed, and have chores done, house cleaned, and all ready to sit down to work by 7 a.m...now I absolutely dread getting out of bed because it means I'm gonna be a hurtin' unit all day.
I've been tested for Lyme and that was negative. The other blood test did have letters...I'm thinking it was that ANA thing but not 100% sure.
The only thing I've taken for pain relief is Tylenol or naproxen but neither work really well and that naproxen just eats my gut away. This early winter certainly isn't helping and I've been dreaming by visiting Realtor.com of finding some place else that's not as artic.
Oye. Time will tell. I have another appt this Friday so we'll see what happens then. Thanks a bunch for listening and offering me advice and well wishes. They are all appreciated like you have no idea!!!
What is shocking to me here in most responses
Is that you feel it is perfectly okay and acceptable to lie, outright, in order to have what you want.
Smokers, obese applicants, alcohol users, those doing risky activities (flying, motorcycles, ATVs, high-risk sports) are considered risks and their premiums and exclusion clauses written for that.
It is NOT okay to lie, period. It is NOT acceptable to get what you want, even if you feel you deserve it, by lying, cheating the system, stealing coverage dollars and rates that are not yours.
If you want to smoke, go ahead but pony up. There are more than just the health risks - there are insurance issues, too. Same for other high-risk applicants.
Unfortunately, it seems to me that the average worker seems to feel they are entitled to have certain things and therefore, if they feel they will be denied, feel it is completely acceptable to lie or misrepresent the facts in order to have what they are looking for.
Pathetic lack of ethics demonstrated through those perspectives and actions.
As for the OP below who calls this Big Brother in action: So, lying and being caught in the act of it is now an attempt of the government to do you in?! How utterly absurd and paranoid!
Get some principles in your lives, people! Take some personal responsibility here! BE HONEST and support honesty.
Shaking my head....
thanks for all of the positive responses!
I did not think i was being negative at all, but here are two responses I got:
So you say the "only" things they do is fight for our country and rights and help out in times of need. What do you think that consists of? How many lives have been given since 1776 to secure and protect those rights? Have you ever looked at the freedoms we have and the wealth we enjoy? What more do you expect the military to do? Wash your clothes. We are the only truly free nation in the world and it is because men and women have chosen to join our military and fight to give you those freedoms that you don't seem to understand.
and
Ma'am, thanks for giving me a subject for my Memorial Day speech in our community. The subject will be:
Americans who have no idea what military heroes have done and are doing for us, thereby humiliating our sacrifices.
These are good responses - maybe they...
If there are children into forced marriages, etc, they should have a mole or something inside. Of course the public would never see physical abuse (they would keep that well hidden), but maybe have someone that would report into the authorities with the names of the kids being forced. I think its absolutely disgusting child marriage. I think the adult women need some major major de-whatever it is called. I have heard of groups who help people get out of cults, that is what they need for the women. But keep the kids with their moms. Would any of you like it if someone came in and ripped your kids from you and you find out it is religously oriented. And shouldn't they have had this figured out before just going in and yanking them out. These children were not in any "eminent" danger. Nobody was beating them or torturing them, yes child marriage is dusgusting and a form of abuse but for pete's sake, have some more solid evidence first. Not some so called "phone call" and they don't know the name of who this girl is or anything. I for one don't believe there was ever a phone call, but again that's just me.
Eeew - even after all these responses sm
It still tempts me, but then again, so does corned beef hash! Oh well, we all have to go from something! I think I'll pass until I get all this out of my mind. My other favorite ---- DEVILED HAM --- mmmmm good! Funny how all the "modified" stuff tastes so good! Modified what?? Who knows - there are only so many body parts, after all! Keep laughing, we need some fun in our lives - gosh all mighty, we need a laugh on here!!!
and I agree with both poster's responses....s/m
Sorry this is happening to you and esp this time of year with all the multi-religious holiday festivities going on in this country all this month....truly hope it ALL gets resolved soon for you!
Considering all the ridiculous responses to this vent..sm
I guess the devil is doing his work...causing conflict! Hope you have a great Christmas, Wannie!
I wish you would have left the initial responses on it :(
dd
I'm confused at your responses - are you the same person?
Are you the same person who keep saying "what are you thinking?" If so, in one post you are telling me everything else can wait and the other you're telling me I should be fired.
why do people post responses like this?
nm
Thank you for all the responses. I will follow your advice. nm
!
Thanks for your responses. I know that I will probably feel better and wish I had done it sooner -
but the thought of having major surgery and being laid up for six weeks is not something I want to do right now. I do have a three month follow-up appt in November so I guess I will just research my options and let myself get used to the idea. Thanks again for your replies.
Glad you asked - I'm considering it too - thanks for all the responses (sm)
I am so tired of having horrible periods!! I know one person who had it done and is thrilled with it. I am glad to hear that others are too. I think I am going to call today to make an appt to ask about it!! (Dealing with a bad period as I type!!!)
The responses I got when I asked the doctor and
My one friend wound up with a hysterectomy even after that endometrial ablation because her bleeding actually got worse. If I were you, I'd consider hysterectomy. I just had one, and I don't miss those heavy bleeds for sure!
Bye-Bye heavy periods, back and leg pain, and irritability once and for all after 8 years of suffering!
responses like this make me not feel so bad :)
Good for you for making the most of it and being happy!!
I have read your responses and apparently
we transcriptionists have really become stuffy in our profession. I thought being anonymous we could tell others things about our own selves and had no idea it would cause such ruffled feathers. As to the person who talked about my eating bread and milk, no have not lost my teeth and I think I said had done this all my life. Sorry others did not find this different but back to the grudge of your everyday life. Just forget it, alright.
Loving these positive responses. Feeling much better about it now!
nm
THANKS -- great article -- loving your responses ! n/m
n
Sigh...No, I am near Atlanta, GA. I have tons of responses to "ship" her, but i just don't
I want to ship her to a stranger, although, YOU sound like the perfect fit for her. She adores our boys and treats them like she is their mother, but she needs a good, stable, loving environment right now. I have to take our son to the doctor again at 3:30 again for severe coughing and respiratory problems..
Thanks for your responses/ideas. I have googled and have used the limited refrences from the neurol
As you saw, there are TONS of hits on google. I was hoping that I could find someone who is currently involved in one. The search continues. Thanks anyway!
Maybe stop calling us all 'witches' and you'll get nicer responses.
nm
Wow. I think this would be my response ...
I'd ask him what he wanted for supper and when he told me I'd tell him to go out and buy it.
LOL
Your response is what I have said all along
that being, people who are not there because of something they have done, but fell down on their luck, totally different. This is not covered under you do it to yourself type posts.
I did get a response....sm
the principal called me and said that 2 other drama students parents had called him about the same issue. The drama teacher did set a schedule at his insistence and sent it home with the students yesterday. It ends up that this is her first year teaching so I reckon' it's things like this that she still has to learn.
Thank you for your response! sm..
We have ordered one that has a built-in NTSC tuner that is supposed to get all analog programming as well as a built-in ATSC tuner that will take over on the digital channels. I'm anxious to see how this works. Thanks again.
Thank you so much for your response!
It is the worst offender of my "falling out." I am seriously considering a reduction, which would hopefully take care of my problem. Thanks again for taking the time to respond!! I appreciate it!
In response
Thank you for your opinion. There are several reasons that we (my DH and I) chose the name that we did. The first is that we were looking for a name from both sides of our families, as my daughter has a family name and my other son does, too. The second is that my pop (step-dad) is a wonderful Papa to his grandkids, and his name happened to be one of the only names that were in both sides.
I do not feel that I discounted their feelings. They knew before he was born and never said a word about it.
My pop raised me. I love my daddy, and it is not that he did a bad job or didn't want me or anything like that, but he was sick and couldn't.
Thanks again, I do appreciate it!
response
I'm scared most days of the week with our kids (grown men), my husband's kids, grandkids and great grandkids ...It's nice to know there are people out there thinking of you and your daughter and trying to make good suggestions....Whatever she chooses, she'll be just fine. Cat
What can anyone say in response to that? (sm)
I read it and just thought "wow". I hope she makes it back safely. Your brother sounds like he is just trying to hold his family together while she goes through her crisis or whatever it is. I know someone who is behaving similarly to this and I don't understand. She is obviously being extremely risky in doing this. It's just crazy. I'm sorry your brother and his children are going through this.
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