My grandchildren bypassed me in earlier years
Posted By: What I did on 2007-11-20
In Reply to: Thanks for not telling me I'm a bad person!! (sm) - Anon - definitely anon!! :-)
to go to their maternal grandmother, their aunts, their cousins, etc. I just finally gave up and did not seek out their visiting me anymore. Their mother did not want to share (my son should have done his share to see both grandparents to have time)- bottom line on this, they live about 15 minutes away- girl went off to college and wrote me saying surprised I did not come around nor call and I seemed to be ok with that. I did not go into why I was not in the picture, told her I was very happy and accept things as they were. She said saw her aunt more than me and told her that was the way it had been since she was born, not my choice but I just came to accept it. I do not worry about it anymore.
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My daughter had done years earlier and
I noticed the other day she looks as though some have started to not be as aligned as they once were. I am hoping she will get a clear one to help realign hers.
Oh, I remember back way years earlier
when Elvis was serving in the army overseas and he met Priscilla- get this, very hush, hush now but he brought her to live with him when she was only 14 or 16 years old, just a child and he was in his 20s. She finished high school in Memphis. Heard years later she was living with his family, not what happened. Now what would that be called today? Older guy, really young girl?
grandchildren
My husband grew up grandparents in same town. Mine were in other states. My mother and in-law did not have the grandma gene. My only grandchild is two days away and I hate it. She is only 18 MO and does not know us. Plan to move closer when hubby retires in six years.
what about grandchildren?....great grandkids?..nm
Step-grandchildren advice anyone?
My son and DIL have dated since my step-granddaughter was 6 months old. They would be together, break up, get back together....you get the picture. Whenever they would break up, DIL would come and get any pictures I had of my step-granddaughter because "I would just throw them away." I have completely stayed out of the situation between my son and DIL because I knew they would be back together in a couple of weeks. At first, I was VERY attached to my now step-granddaughter. I have evidently built up a wall now and I am having a very hard time being a "real" grandma to her. I feel so guilty about this but just can't seem to become attached to her. I guess I've built up some walls in fear that she will be taken away again like she had been so many times before. I know it isn't her fault. By the way, she is 8 now and they have been married for 4 years. Anyhow, they are trying to have a baby and I am so excited...but feel horribly guilty because of it. I just know in my heart that this baby will always be my grandchild. By the way, DIL's parents are divorced and they all spoil my granddaughter like it is a competition. She has every toy imaginable. I guess my question is, how do I get over it and really be a grandma to her?
I have thrown in the towel with kids, grandchildren
Know this sounds harsh but I just got tired of trying. I am the kid's paternal grandmother and never came close to the love and affection they showered on their maternal one even though I tried and tried. They were taken as small infants mostly to her home and I came in a far second even though we lived close by one another. They are now 16 and 18 and I rarely see or talk with them and I have a wonderful life and it really doesn't bother me anymore like it once did. Such are the facts of life. My son (their father) apparently was engulfed by the other side and did not stand up for me. That is life. I just wish them well.
Two youngest grandchildren here tonight. They love breakfast for supper. (sm)
Will do bacon, hashbrowns, a frittata, biscuits and juice. If their mom gets here in time for supper will do gravy for her biscuits. The kids and my husband don't care for biscuits and gravy. (Go Figure).
Ah, the L was there earlier, but I ate it.
Sorry.
Yes!! Exactly the same for me, only earlier (sm)
That same horrible, boring feeling but it was not related to work - it was related to my life. I think when you are a mom you start to become just sort of a facilitator for your kids in everyone's eyes - not really the kids eyes - but all the other adults and family members. I mean think about it - we had a group outing recently and all the moms sat on the deck "watching" while the kids and dads went waterskiing and getting pulled on the tube, etc. If as the mom you do decide you want a turn you have to wait patiently for all the kids to have their turn and then if you really boldly get up there an say you just really want a turn - you might get one. I know that's kind of a silly example, but that's how it is in real life for moms! Anyway, for a few years I wanted excitement so bad - I felt like I was going to explode. I am not sure a midlife crisis is always a bad thing - sometimes it is sort of a wake up call saying Hey!! You're not getting any younger!! is this how you want to spend the rest of your life??? Mundane and half-***?? I made a lot of changes - one of them was changing jobs - but then I changed back because I really like having my freedom with my job - but did find a better transcription service to work for. My marriage has been rocked and I don't know exactly what I am going to do about that yet, but I HAD TO make some changes. Whew!! Sorry you asked? LOL!
I saw this earlier this morning, as well--sm
and on my start page, they actually showed a picture of the poor puppy! I was appalled at what I consider to be a lenient sentence for inflicting nothing but anger and hatred on a poor defensless animal. Unfortunately, treating these types of people the same way they treat other beings constitutes a crime and violates *their* rights, and would instill a punishment on us far worse than what he received. However, if it was possible to inflict on him the same as he inflicted, I would be the first in line to do so!!! I highly doubt one of his punishments of 48 hours of counseling is going to undo what is screwed up in his brain! But I would surely love to be his *counselor*.
I saw this earlier today (sm)
On the Today Show. It seems that some feel sympathy for her because of her age. From what I have seen, she was asking for it from the moment she was stopped. The police have no idea who or what they will encounter and he could have been facing oncoming traffic about to plow him over, all because a "72-year-old lady" wouldn't move off the road.
Or from earlier, Cagney and Lacey. nm
s
This is 100% correct and like I stated earlier
The mother is making excuses for them not to go. She needs to check her attitude because kids play on this. Pack a bunch of things they like and don’t play into their crying. She apparently does not care much about the MIL- it comes out in her posts- saying she only wants to show them off? Most grandparents want to show off g'kids. This is not unusual.
What happened to all the other posts that were here earlier? Mod..can you help? nm
nm.
Try to work an earlier shift. Your
daughter should be able to keep herself busy with homework, chores, etc, until you get done working. Then when you aren't working, let her have her friends over or take her to a friend's house. You don't need to be distracted when you are working, especially in our line of work. She will just have to understand. But I would let her have her time with her friends when you are off. It will be less distracting for you and you won't have to jump up to see what is going on.
Eye problems posted earlier
Turns out it was just another eye infection that had my upper "flab" under the eybrow swollen so bad. Whew! Was I ever scared. The eye is now back to normal complete with "weeping" that I have had for the past 8 years when I'm on the computer too long.
I want to thank you all for your support and suggestions. You guys are the greatest.
I know you said that earlier; you however did not give specific instructions on how to use it. sm
I was just trying to be helpful -- not take the wind out of your sails!
An office manager earlier in my career...
... those of you who have been around long enough will know the type... the polyester queen who'd started with the doctor when he opened his practice in 1951, and she used to work until 11 o'clock every night, keeping things caught up, but never put in for OT pay, and because she had done it, she expected the rest of us to do it too.... Labor laws? We don't need no stinkin' labor laws.... (No, we didn't stay one minute past closing time. We didn't let her guilt us into it.)
When I started at the job, I was promised a raise in a certain amount after 3 months. I got half the amount, and I was too chicken to raise a stink. Later, my finances got so tight, I went to her to tell her if I didn't get a raise, I was going to lose my apartment and have to move back in with my parents. She claimed she asked the doctors, came back, and told me I'd have to move back home. I later found out she never asked the doctors--and that if she had, they'd have granted the raise. Grrrrr.....
My desk was right next to hers, and if my typewriter was silent for more than 5 seconds she'd look over and comment on the fact that I wasn't working. Nevermind that I was looking something up in the Dorland's at the time....
Many, many years later, I somehow wound up next to her at a retirement party for one of the doctors. She too had long since retired, and I too had moved on, but they invited back any and all of the old staff they could find. By the end of the luncheon I was wondering how on EARTH I sat next to that witch with a capital B for 3 long years and didn't KILL her. Because she was still at it--picked on every single thing I did, including the fact that I ordered steak, because steak isn't for lunch, it's for dinner, and that if you can't afford to pay cash in full for a car, you are not to buy the car, you are to ride the bus to work until you have saved up the full cash price of the car. Then she grabbed my hand and screeched, "Do you bite your nails?"
Come to think of it... it was during that era that I started getting really, really cranky............... :)
Traffic is lighter earlier in the morning
And you'll have a little extra time at your vacation destination! I'm usually geared up to go on vacation anyway and it doesn't seem too awful to have to get up early and go!
Hope you have a great time!
On Jackson, what I said earlier today to husband was
since Farrah Fawcett died today, McMann yesterday I had always heard of hollywood deaths coming in 3s since I was a young child and I told hubby would not be surprised if another person dies soon. Unbelievable, sure did not think about Michael Jackson if this is true.
Ed Bradley from 60 minutes died of leukemia earlier. Sad. nm
m
I used to work for a finance company many in an earlier lifetime, sm
At that time, I never saw anything repossessed. However, they would guarnishee people's wages. The first thing you need to do is to contact the lenders to work something out. Sometimes they used to refinance the loans to lower the payments. Or, you could contact somebody like Consumer Credit Counseling Service (be careful and find a legitimate company). They can work out deals with your creditors. Be prepared that this will not help your credit rating, but the companies usually work with you if you are up front and communicate with them. At least they did back when I was working with them. The worst thing to do is to avoid them.
On the other hand, if you financed the furniture through the store, it could be that they would repossess. I know they do with cars.
What I was referring to was taking out a loan and putting down household goods as collateral, which is what people did when I was working for the finance company.
Acetone is nail polish remover, already said that earlier
NM
Posted about cabbage soup diet earlier
I made the soup yesterday and along with what it calls for added additional bellpeppers, garlic, lots, coriander (spelling?), parsley and both chunked up tomatoes and whole tomatoes. It is absolutely delicious and filling. Ok, not even 11 a.m. yet and I cooked some turnip greens this morning and ate some already (today is the vegetable and soup day). This diet is being used as a bridge for me as next week when I am not supposed to be on the diet, I have been setting up meals such as fish, lean meats and loads of vegetables, not fried for this week coming up. I had tried this diet some years back and like 1 of the posters, found it completely unpalatable but then again did not try the various spices like I have this time. Hope I am on my way to the XXXX amount of weight I need to lose!!
I posted earlier today asking for some suggestions to relieve severe s/m
hot flashes. Tonight I am doing a search for cures and came across a site that swears by apple cider vinegar. There are many posts on this site stating this has been a miracle for not only hot flashes but many other conditions. Now my question. . . How do you drink vinegar in water every day? I am terrible about any liquid medicines, etc. with a bad taste. Anyone use ACV? I wish there was a better way to ingest it. Thanks!
My husband is 7.5 years younger. Been together almost 20 happy years...nm
nm
My feelings; people shacking up together for years and years
and then all of a sudden deciding to get married don't need a thing, obviously. A shower should not even be given. I lived with my now husband a while (nowadays who doesn't!) before we married and I also had been married before years ago but he was not....so of course HIS mom wanted a shower. I told her absolutely not unless it was just the immediate family, his mom, sisters, etc, more like a celebration/get together. And so that's what we did. Showers are tacky, period. Unless it's a couple of young kids getting married straight out of the house and that doesn't happen much anymore.
I wish we could all go the week of the graduation but their graduations are always a week earlier th
ours. So actually all three of my kids are still in school this week while all of hers will already be out. My youngest is actually missing school to go but my two older kids have finals so they can't go at all that week.
Thank you. I guess I'm just trying to find a nice way to say it without causing friction and keeping the peace.
My DH is your typical male, just deal with it when the time comes whereas I want to take care of things right away without hurting anyone's feelings.
And FYI, the thread we are posting in right now was one I started, you started the earlier one. nm
x
Not by choice earlier in life, but now no kids by choice
When I was young we desperately wanted kids. We tried for years. (I never took birth control ever, and we even took fertility drugs and planned for multiple kids, just never worked out). Then went through a period of years where husband didn't want them but I did, then years where husband wanted them but I didn't, then about 15 years ago we both decided we didn't want them. We didn't even know what we wanted in life for ourselves and we figured if we couldn't figure out what we wanted why in the world would we bring kids into the world. Now I'm thankful we never did have kids and hope that we never do (I'm 52 with only one ovary - had ectopic pregnancy a few years back), but chances are I do not think we will ever have kids. Now I just cannot tolerate the kids. The little ones are very cute and we love hearing them play in our neighborhood. Some of the things they say are the funniest, but once they get to a certain age it seems like something in them transforms. When they lose the innocence of youth and start becoming little bullies talking back to their parents with their snotty attitudes we just always say, if he was my kid he'd never see the light of day again. Nothing drives me more insane to see the way some of these kids talk to their parents.
But now a days with all the bad going on in the country (around the world) and the country heading for disaster, and if the Mayan calendar is correct and in 2012 we see some major earth changes and the possibilities of civilizations being wiped out, who would want to put their kids through that.
So, I just say - I'm free of kids and loving it!
Been with a man 13 years older, now with a man 4 years younger.
Younger is better, at least in my case ;)
Sorry, meant 75 cents. Still, that was years and years ago.
xx
I studied to be a scopist years and years ago
Back in the early 1990s I took a course called Note reader Scopist. They read court reporter notes (those long skinny papers that looks like a cash receipt) and types them into documents. I had found the course through something called At Home Professions but just didn't finish it because it was too expensive for me. But I am familiar with them and even found my book from the first course I took. Looking back I think it would have been a blast if I had kept up with it.
It is definitely legitimate. A lot has changed since the early 90s, so I'm not too familiar with the industry now. I do remember what was really weird was it didn't take a lot for me to learn it. For instance I could look at a line of court notes and see something that looked like: NV p srn - and I seemed to know exactly what it said. Just weird. My DH used to say that I understood it because I was an alien and my ship crashed in Roswell. HA HA HA Anyway...that's what I know about it. But if you Google note reader scopist or at home professions i'm sure you could probably find a lot of info.
I have been vegetarian on/off for 35 years, was vegan for about 5 years sm
not that hard. Right now, I am having so many issues with food allergies and celiac disease, having to give up nightshade veggies...nothing left to eat. I am eating some meat now, but not when the gastroparesis sets in!
Being vegan is not hard...unless you are a celiac. This is how I figured out the celiac part because so many of the meat analogs and vegan packaged foods use gluten for the protein and I got really sick from it. I gave up all the premade things and the whole grains with gluten and I was fine.
There is vegan and then there is VE-GAN. By definition, vegans don't wear, use or consume anything that is derived of animals...no leather shoes, most shampoos and toothpastes are off the list, as are deodorants. No wool or silk. Anything with soap usually has animal byproducts. It is very involved and rather difficult to do.
Giving up meat, eggs and dairy is no big deal, except for cheese. You hear that ad about "comfort proteins" in a baby formula and there is such a thing. Mother's milk, be it human, cow, goat, whatever...contains a chemical that triggers the release of endorphins in the brain so that feeding feels good in more ways than one. The purpose of this is ensure that the nursed young want to nurse and thrive. Human milk has a lot of these, so does cow's milk and cow juice triggers the same reaction in the adult human brain. Cheese is concentrated milk and therefore these chemicals are also concentrated. As a result, cheese is an addictive substance. This is the hardest thing to give up when going vegan. Vegan cheese substitutes are nasty and they don't melt. If a dairy-free cheese melts, it contains casein, an animal protein and not vegan.
I studied this years and years and years ago
Most definitely is legitimate. In the late 1980s I studied to be a note reader scopist through a group called At Home Professions. I loved it, but unfortunately could not continue due to no funds. It was reading the court reporters notes which looked like a grocery receipt with a bunch of letters scattered on it. The weird thing was I found it extremely easy. For instance I would see a line that looked like: av e cr, and for some reason I would know what it said. My DH told me that's because I'm an alien and my ship landed in Roswell. HA HA. Well I know that a lot has changed, after all it's been over 20 years since I took the first course and know a lot of it is computerized now, but it is most definitely legitimate and I've heard people like to do it. I think I remember one of the courses was in medical terminology and another course was in legal terminology. Should be able to find a lot of it on google, or maybe go to your local college if they offer it and talk to an instructor.
This has happened for years and years, where have you been?
Frank Sinatra, Elvis, the Beatles, and on and on. This person is acting very normal like the age she is. You would have to have been under a rock to think differently, like this was an abnormal behavior....
Lost my mom 23 years ago and dad 18 years ago.
My son was not even 1 when my mom died....she was only 50. My dad died at age 59. So even though I feel your pain....I would have been very grateful to have them into their 80's. I guess we take what we get and be thankful. Sometimes it is hard though.
I was married for 13 years and 2 years
after my divorce I met the most incredible man. He was also divorced, we both have 2 kids, and though we are not married, we have been together for 9 years. They are still out there, you may have to go through a few marginal ones before you find him, but they are out there and available.
Was your kid almost THREE years old?
tt
I am and have been for 3-1/2 years....sm
feel free to e-mail me any questions you may have and I'll answer the best I can. For me, foster parenting has been a very rewarding experience.
this years
x
I had it done 5 years ago.
The good: Surgery went well. Lost from 420 pounds down to 175.
The bad: Became depressed, lost my hair, damaged a kidney, and eventually gained the weight back. Weight 350 pounds now.
If you can't change your habits now, you probably won't change it then either.
Only 5% of those who lose weight (even with surgery) keep it off.
DH had one about 5 years ago....
It was a breeze for him, and only a $10 copay! He tried to be macho though and lift something pretty heavy 2 days later, ended up home for about 4 days and pretty sore! All in all everything has been A-OK, he has never had a problem. Didn't slow him down any either, he is still quite the man, if you know what I mean! LOL! Good luck, hope it works out for you.
We do...even after 21 years.
About 17 years ago,
I had an ex-boyfriend that owed them money. Don't know if he was buying it or selling it, and never had heard of them before that, or since then.
WW as of 2 years
I did WW 2 years ago. They have 2 plans, the core and flex. I did the flex. It is a point system. Basically you eat anything you want. You keep a diary of what you eat and add up the points at the end of the day. The points was based on the number of calories, amount of fat and fiber I think too. I don't know anything about the core plan. I did loose weight the 3 weeks I was there. I went from 196 to 189. I quit when I got pregnant and never went back. I would love to go back but I don't think I would get much out of a meeting anymore. I have a 5 year old that gets bored and a 16 month-old that won't sit still. I think the cost back then was $11 a week.
Had it when I was 11 years old. sm
I really cannot remember how long I had it before I was diagnosed, seemed to last a looong time though. Mine started out with one lesion on my torso, which itched but would feel like someone was stabbing me if I touched it... even if my SHIRT touched it! All of the lesions were very painful, but I remember that one most because it got infected. Turned a grayish green and oozed. I still have a large scar from it. Hope you feel better soon. It is very painful.
I took it for about 10 years.
I just changed to Effexor. Ten mg is an extremely low dose. To keep migraines and neck/shoulder tightness under control I needed 20. But 50 mg, even though that's still a pretty low dose, could cause daytime drowsiness for me. Other people might take 100 mg, I believe. And at 50 mg there was a little weight gain, also. If you still have trouble, you might try melatonin also. I hope you're feeling better soon.
I don't think 8 years is all that much, I think it would be a lot of fun!
x
My SIL had it done about 1 1/2 years ago; had no ...
real problems; lost about 125 pounds. I also know a guy who had it about 2 years ago and has lost about 175 pounds. He really has not had problems either. You really have to research the doctor, though, and a lot of people have had problems with it.
BF for 6 years
Also does not make me a crazed lunatic, either - as many of you have alluded to - you would be very surprised if you met me on the street - I look just as normal as any of you - only probably slimmer and with larger natural breasts - and remember large areolas (LOL)
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