My daughter was drinking heavily, she didn't know that I knew but she would
Posted By: sm on 2007-02-18
In Reply to: My 16-year-old daughter smoking - KC
act strange and when I would try to come close to her casually, she would pull away. I waited til she fell asleep and could smell the booze on her breath. The next day I told her I would buy lunch if she could go grab it and when she left I went in her room and found to stashed bottle of some cheap rum. I know it sounds bad but I put some ipecac in the bottle and then waited. I didn't put much, but it was effective. She blew chunks and blew and blew. She thought she just got sick, but about a week later I did it again and after she got sick that time, that was the end of her drinking. Smart girl, eh? She somehow figured out that drinking rum made her sick! I may sound like a terrible mom, but I also don't have a drunk for daughter now either.
Complete Discussion Below:  marks the location of current message within thread
The messages you are viewing
are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select
the boards given in left menu
Other related messages found in our database
My oldest daughter knew when she was 10
Kids talk at school and on the bus, and I'm sure that's how she found out about Santa and the Easter Bunny, etc. Of course now she's 14 and tells me how could someone believe in a huge bunny who comes to your house and leaves candy. LOL. I also have a 5 year old and the older one knows under no circumstances is she to tell her sister anything. She can find out on her own. I think you should just let him know that he shouldn't tell the younger ones just like you were planning.
my daughter 27 is in braces and I knew a lady
I didn't know you compound wives knew how to use computers!!!
x
This may sound funny, but I knew when I didn't care enough
to even fight with him more. It just wasn't worth the time or the energy anymore.
Well obviously I meant the divinity. I'm sorry I didn't elaborate. I figure you knew what I me
...
he didn't bring back Nelli cuz he knew he was wrong for just sending those 2 in the meeting.
nm
I really tried, and my daughter didn't listen, now HIV+
I hear what you are saying and if words alone would have done it, my daughter would never, ever wound up like now. I was NOT overbearing, too lenient in fact now that I think back. I have posted here before, in the 80s about every other report was HIV but then NO name for it, did not want where from, horrible dictations and I tried. People just do not understand that talking, religious upbringing, close-knit families, whatever still does not stop a child from indulging in sexual behavior if they want to. I probably would focus more now on the SAFER aspect of sex, nothing can be completely safe except no sex at all. I understand but hopefully you can be close enough to help her get birth control and also a frank talk about SAFER sex. Lordy, you got to get around the sexual issue before worrying about the smoking.
Well my daughter didn't have school on Friday
because of some sort of teacher's holiday that we'd completely forgotten about, so tomorrow (MONDAY) is the day she'll have to report to the principal (or maybe VP?) in the morning and let them know what she's decided for her punishment for tardies.
What we've decided is to go ahead and let her take the paddling (and I've signed the OK) and IF it happens again, she's just going to have to miss class, there's no way around it.
Funny thing is, now that she's decided to take the paddling, she's scared! I think it was easier to go ahead and accept before she knew I was going to say she could, if that makes sense. Now that I've said OK and signed the paper, she isn't totally sure she wants to be paddled, but she knows she doesn't want to miss class.
I told her this is what happens when you break the rules. She was warned repeatedly not to be tardy and to take her chit chat to lunch or after school.
I'm nervous for her but I will try to keep myself busy and not think about it tomorrow. Hopefully the paddling will be early in the day when I'm still sleeping so when I wake up from my nap, I'll know it's already happened.
I heard she and her friend talking about it last night (friend stayed over because her parents are out of town). Friend has been on the receiving end of the paddle before and said it really stings, which is not what my daughter has heard before and certainly not want she wanted to hear now! So they spent about half an hour last night picking out which jeans for her to wear Monday that would provide the best padding protection.
Thanks for everyone's input on this topic. I don't like the idea one bit but am trying to come to grips with it and hope she learns something from this experience.
And the drinking age is....
This might have changed since my kids were growing up. When the kids and I visited Jamaica, no drinking age there and so my 15 year old son was allowed to drink, even his much younger sister could order from a bar but in the US the age was 21 and so that was what I expected out of them. I personally would hold any parents legally responsible for letting under aged kids drink at their home. I am too much of a stickler for the laws of the land.
husband's drinking
I think, from what I have read, is that he can only help himself in stopping. Has to hit bottom....after AA and being sober would be the time for your support. I think by staying with him now you will be co-inabling. He knows you are there, so he probably feels "so what, she's still here and I'm still drinking". He has to want to stop, until then he won't. Remember, it is a disease, and it can't be cured, but can be taken "one day at a time". Best of luck.
drinking for 2 years is not trying it out
Your daughter is headed down the wrong path. If she's been smoking for 2 years, she's not trying that out anymore, either. Apparently, both of these new habits "fit" and she's taking them home. The fact that she says she feels relieved not having to hide it anymore is a sure sign she has no intention of quitting. I strongly urge you to discipline her. Children need discipline. She may hate you for it now, but your job is to be her mother, not her friend. Both of these habits carry dire consequence over the long-term (which I'm sure you are aware of) and both of these habits only get worse over time.
Yes, I tried alcohol and cigarettes when I was 16 (no drugs) but only a couple of times. To this day, I still don't like the taste of beer and never drank any other alcohol until I was over 21. When my mom/dad found out what I was doing, I was severely disciplined - grounded, spanked (yes I said spanked at 16), and was stripped of any privileges. This definitely deterred me from participating in these things after I was allowed to resume a normal life. This may sound harsh, but I'm thankful today my parents put an end to it when they did. I intend to do the same with my children. I think that's the problem with a lot of today's youth -- they're parents are too worried about being their friend, instead of doing their job as a parent.
What is Nicki drinking?
I know she is drinking the drink that David drugged, but it looks like white wine or champagne. WTH? It certainly dosesn't look like sparkling water or whatever the recovering alcoholic normally drinks.
I would not drive after drinking it!
Use in place of wine:)
drinking soda
I think that drinking soda aggravates that. Cranberry juice and herbals teas calm this sort of thing down for me.
Legal Drinking Age
Many of the states that have chosen to specifically prohibit alcohol consumption by those under age 21 have a variety of exceptions. For example,
Some States allow an exception for consumption when a family member consents and/or is present. States vary widely in terms of which relatives may consent or must be present for this exception to apply and in what circumstances the exception applies. Sometimes a reference is made simply to "family" or "family member" without further elaboration.
....
Some States allow an exception for consumption on private property. States vary in the extent of the private property exception which may extend to all private locations, private residences only, or in the home of a parent or guardian only. In some jurisdictions, the location exception is conditional on the presence and/or consent of the parent, legal guardian, or legal-age spouse.
Some States also allow exceptions for educational purposes (e.g., students in culinary schools), religious purposes (e.g., sacramental use of alcoholic beverages), or medical purposes.
http://www2.potsdam.edu/hansondj/LegalDrinkingAge.html
if he quits drinking and changes for the better, you have your answer
nm
Lowering the legal drinking age from 21 to 18
I didn't know this was going on.....
The article is long so I didn't copy all of it. See the link below:
College presidents from about 100 of the nation's best-known universities, including Duke, Dartmouth and Ohio State, are calling on lawmakers to consider lowering the drinking age from 21 to 18, saying current laws actually encourage dangerous binge drinking on campus.
The movement called the Amethyst Initiative began quietly recruiting presidents more than a year ago to provoke national debate about the drinking age.
"This is a law that is routinely evaded," said John McCardell, former president of Middlebury College in Vermont who started the organization.
"It is a law that the people at whom it is directed believe is unjust and unfair and discriminatory."
Drinking 9-12 beers a day means he is
No, sure donot see that. Was he drinking the beer
on the unicycle? LOL
Try drinking 8 glasses of water a day...(SM)
I just spoke with a friend whose husband was advised by his doctort to drink a lot of water for his back problem. He did and it worked and he feels better overall. Could be the bones in your feet are dry and building up with calcium.
Red Cross told me excessive tea drinking could cause anemia.
o
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking.
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking.
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines
Try drinking lots of water today, bet you feel at least nm
x
It's the other guy's wife that's strange. I can see guys drinking, watching
xx
I would have called the police right from the start, especially with underage drinking.
the mother could be brought up on charges of furnishing aldohol to minors for starters. Don't put up with it for another minute. The police will not tell who called, they just show up on the door step and take care of business.
Good luck.
EXCUSE ME! Smoking and/or drinking does not make you a bad parent! sm
I smoke. I drink margaritas when I choose too. This does not have any effect on how I raise my children. One is a straight A student. The third is an average student. Then I have my 21yo who is excelling in the nursing program and just told me tonight I was a great mom no matter how she used to argue with me, which she did and regularly. Smoking and/or drinking does not play a role in life unless you are an alcoholic. Just because someone drinks, they are not and guess what... they can still be a mom/dad and raise wonderful children.
If you want to pick something that is wrong, how about a church that teaches children to fast when they are only 11 and already underweight (not mine but a friend's). That is more wrong.
It is just like drinking Coors light determines you will have a boy baby and Miller Lite a girl. sm
I have heard that actually; however, it is not true.
I did hear that too much Mountain Dew makes one impotent!
Don't know who dreams this stuff up, but I would have to say it is not true at all. My hubby only drinks Coors Light and we have a boy and a girl, go figure! LOL
Daughter's phone is daughter's responsibility. Valuable lesson learned.
It should be between the daughter and the friend if the friend is going to pay any of the fees. They are teenagers, not preschoolers.
Thank you! I didn't realize they made computer glasses. Will make an appt. Spit didn't wor
3
I didn't say her decor didn't sound great.
It's not ridiculous.
I would seriously doubt the Christianity of anyone who feels it is okay to celebrate Halloween. It is anti-God in every aspect.
You can only service 1 God and the folly of man and carnality is in direct conflict with holiness.
Thanks - I didn't realize they didn't like the smell of citrus
I have the feeling he doesnt have a UTI and he's trying to tell me something else, but I'll be taking him to the vets to be safe.
If you only knew!
I'm not a pagan, just simply educated on many different religions and other things of interest to me.
I knew when I saw what was going on,
simple. He was having wrecks and letting me know about them. His wife was deceased and I tried to get help for him and even telling him he was being taken, did not think so. Red flags flying all around- 1 lady who cared for his wife before her death, married, younger than me, all of a sudden taking interest in a 90 year old man who did not use deodorant? No way. I was out of town, bottom line after his death the person I spoke had got $60,000.00 from him, had him set up an account in her name and his social security check and other monies going directly into that account. I knew what I saw. She went to the bank the day after his death and pulled all out. I have been there.
see, I knew you all (most) would come through
for me. Sounds like a good alternative. You guys have given me great ideas.
Knew you could do it.
Didn't take long at all once your Realtor knew you meant business. Better for him, anyway.
And to think I knew all of these
guess not, have so many of those sayings and yet had never heard of this.
I wish I knew
I have one in the house now that keeps landing on my computer screen. I can't get rid of him. Even my cat is no help this evening.
They say she knew nothing - I don't see how though (nm)
x
That is when I knew that...
...it was over in my first marriage When I was glad to see his a** go out that door and say to myself *good*, then I knew I had really lost that lovin' feeling.
THanks so much, knew there was a way nm
mm
maybe you took him b/c you knew
x
I never knew that
But with the large refund we got it's paying a credit card that we've been trying to pay off forever so I'll take the refund anyway I can.
I knew someone who did this too
I think this is a wonderful idea - of course, it wouldn't work for everyone but I can see a lot of benefits if it could work for you...
No...I never knew that either
Not that I care either way, I like her, just never knew that
Yes, and this is how I knew as well. sm
When you get to I don't give $ ___ you are there!
I wish I knew what to say but I am
65 now and have yet to have a midlife crisis. What is going on in your life that you just want to sleep and nothing else. You have no joys in life, just work alone? I have been in what I call ruts before but eventually snapped out of those. One thing is with my work if I would ever just get so fed up with working a lot and burned out basically, would find some time to take off from work and do other things I might enjoy, such as an escape to a movie, the zoo, etc.
Hey thanx, I never knew that! :) sm
About only adjectives with three or more syllables getting the comparative/superlative form of "more" and "most".
I've ALWAYS said "more stupid", but "stupidest" or "most stupid". Why, I don't know. But I usually avoid that word in any form.....
if you knew you were about to die
A friend of ours was a heavy smoker and drinker. He had an heart attack and quit smoking because of it. He has a bad liver and had to quit drinking. Now he found out he has about 9 months to live if he is lucky. He has cancer and it is in all his organs. He had started back to smoking and drinking heavy. Would you do the same thing?
We knew that - we won't dock your pay for it! LOL
x
thanks Jon-but I knew difference between the 2.
Gee. I knew that would happen! LOL!
|
