My daughter was a very social butterfly
Posted By: and still had allergies and eczema. on 2007-02-16
In Reply to: My opinion on germs with - Four healthy kids
nm
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Butterfly!!! (aka Prissy) Thanks for the smile :-)
:-)
Social security
She will receive social security at a rate of 50% of what he receives as long as they have been married for 10 years. Am not sure if you can begin to collect this at age 6 or have to wait until 65 or 66. As far as medicare goes though, she is not eligible for this until she reaches 65/66 unless she is deemed disabled and not able to work and then she goes on SSI. Up to 3 wives-ex-wives can receive 50% of what the husband's social security allotment is without reduction but it never reduces the husband's amount. (as long as they have been married for 10 years). They did this so that all of the older ladies that never worked in the 40's 50's etc. could receive something when they retired as long as their husband was eligible. Now if he should die, she will receive more and that will stay in effect until she dies. With as expensive as Medicare and supplements are becoming it is no longer a deal to get Medicare and hardly any docs will take Medicare "only".
Patti
I know I'm a bit of a social oddball, but
I like to be upfront and lay things out on the table, so I would talk to her and let her know how I was feeling. This approach does not work well with everyone, surprisingly to me . . . LOL. Most people say they want that, but it does not seem to hold true. Personally, I do not see how relationships work without complete honesty.
I think that you would at least feel better if you talked to her. Good luck whatever you decide!
Do you get social security now and if so
how old when you started? I am past the age of starting but want to reach full retirement age for me so I can double dip.
Social Security
There is some reason that you should take Soc. Security when you are eligible. You can still work--I think up to a certain amount if you are younger than 65. At 65 you can make as much as you want. They say this is some kind of window--working right before or at the point of getting SS ultimately raises the amount. There is a five-year window that is important. I suggest you get some info from the SS office or a local AARP office or Senior info. I have come back from "retirement" so I am facing these same things. Oh, and by the way. You--my sister (and occasionally brother) MTs--My People--you are all just as crazy as you always were. And thankfully! This message board did not exist the last time I did MT. Cool!
social animals
Rodents, rats especially, are very very social animals and are intelligent and desire human contact. I've had 6 diff rats, all are passed away now cause they only last a few years, but they are very playful and will play with you and like to be held, petted and carried around. The more you do that the more friendly they get!
Have fun!
The slain social worker one? nm
.
social services should be contacted
to look at this family. It might be futile, but good grief, something needs to happen. That is unreal, beyond bizarre.
Do they by any chance have a social worker you...
could contact? That way, if the social worker stepped in no one in the family would really be so "involved" and it might save hard feelings further down the road but might have the same results.
What woman? What social worker?
We need a little more info to go on if anyone's going to try to help you out on this! You've got me intrigued, though! Lee
Check social services
your local salvation army, cancer center, and local hospitals. THERE IS HELP for you without insurance. Please don't give up. There are options. It just takes a little research and if you are working from home you must have the internet. I know things seem bad, but they could always get worse. Sometimes I need to remind myself of that to get out of bed in the morning.
I have 5. All MTs. I would like a broader social circle
xx
Social Services Visiting
The main thing I'd say is to remain calm and explain to the investigator like you did here. Their job is to sort out the truth from the fiction. I was investigated once because my MTSO made false accusations about me to the police.
I had to answer questions I didn't enjoy but when the interview was over the investigator was done she told me she believed me and I had nothing to worry about, but if the accuser made another call they'd file harassment charges against me.
The truth is the truth and they'll sort it out. Patience will serve you well.
Daughter's phone is daughter's responsibility. Valuable lesson learned.
It should be between the daughter and the friend if the friend is going to pay any of the fees. They are teenagers, not preschoolers.
Why was the post on social isolation deleted??
I was going to post a response to this and see the thread is gone! It was just posted a few minutes ago and I'm wondering what happened here.
Update on social worker from my post the other day (sm)
I posted the other day about where I had seen that social worker before, and couldn't find her on the cast list - wouldn't have helped if I had. I was watching Sally Field on the Boniva commercial and it popped into my head. Social worker was on that Boniva commercial where those 4 women were supposed to be being quiet in a museum. Isn't it funny how the brain works? - haha - especially mine.
I think that constitute abuse! Dogs are very social - sm
animals, and their human families are their *pack*. That poor dog is bored and lonely. It's crying proves that food and water alone are not enough to nourish an intelligent, social animal like a little Sheltie. I would tip off animal control. I'm sure it can be done annonymously. If the dog is confiscated, you can help it out by looking for a Sheltie-rescue in your area, and if not, possibly a regular animal rescue group. If she's healthy & has a good temperament, they may pull her from the shelter and foster her 'til someone can adopt her.
Or -- if that sounds too drastic, if you know the other people are gone, why not climb the fence into her backyard, and befriend & play with the dog? That would be better than nothing, although it sounds like the best option would be to find that dog a new family.
Can anyone tell me that is on social security how they figure how much to deduct if you go over what
you are allowed to make per month. I did speak to them but I just wondered if someone on here has done this at all.
retired homemaker for social history -
most of us know that would mean dead!!! Like Social Security comes in and does the dishes for us?
no but usually irresponsible people in poor social
yes I had one and i was all of the above!! Now i'm on Depo and don't have that problem anymore
I stay home!!! (I think I have social anxiety). nm
nm
People on social security who pay no taxes
got back as individual $600 each last time and I know for a fact as my 85 year old aunt was one of those.
When amount of this for social security people and when?
Do you have a link for this info, pls.
Just an update on my Social Worker visit.
No one has come by yet, but it's only Monday, but I did get the house cleaned with the help of my son, his girlfriend, and two of his friends. I took the advice below about shuffling all my ex-husband's junk to the garage. He has a fixer upper car in the garage anyway, so I just piled stuff around it, on top of it, and in it. The garage is a complete mess, but we don't live in there, so whatever. My son and his buddies cleaned up outside the house too. We had about 10 bags of trash for the trash truck this morning, but they took every one of them. Thank goodness!!
I'm way more calmer now than I was on Friday when all this crap broke loose. Thanks to everyone for calming me down. I'm ready now for when the social worker stops by. I saw another officer over the weekend at the gas station and he asked me about my situation, asked me if my ex was ever served and then told me that he was proud of me for finally getting rid of him and that he would talk to his boss about this whole "social services thing." He said his boss (who was the officer at my house on Friday) doesn't really know the ins and outs of the community like the officers do and he'd make sure he let him know that my ex is the one causing all the trouble.
So that made me feel better too. I just can't believe how ugly this is getting. I guess I'd better prepare myself because it will probably get worse before it gets better. The divorce is just beginning.
I've gained a lot too but I have worked on having a social life (sm)
There is a website called Exercisefriends dot com where you can post for people in your area to walk with or whatever sport you like. I found a walking buddy like that and we are now best friends for the past few years now(she works at home too). But the part-time job is a good idea too - those jobs are fun even though you don't make much money.
Found it on Social Security website $250 by May 2009 nm
m
I just found out that social services will be paying me a visit and I am
freaking out! My estranged husband, on whom I have a restraining order, showed up at my house today, obviously he had been drinking. Long story short, one of my son's friends shows up, one that is not allowed at the house. I immediately sent the teenager away, but my husband proceeds to start raging about how he would run things if he were still living here. I then told him he could leave as well. That I kicked the teenager and I expected him to leave too. He refused and said he would leave if I gave him money because he needs to contribute groceries to his buddy with whom he is staying. He doesn't work and hasn't worked for much of our marriage. I told him if he wanted to help out his buddy, he should get a job. He came into the house, sat down on my couch and refused to leave until I gave him money.
My son called the police to enforce the restraining order. The police show up and while he is in their custody, he tells them that I have 10 to 14 teenagers in my house every day and that he doesn't feel that it is a good environment for our 8yo daughter. He tells there was marijuana in my house.
So now the police are telling me they have to file a report with family services because my house could be a hostile environment and they have to follow up on every complaint. The marijuana episode did happen; however, my daughter and I were not at home. My husband was still living at home at the time and caught my son and a couple of friends smoking it and instead of stopping them immediately and kicking everybody out, I was told that he took a hit off the joint. I was told that by all three kids whom I questioned separately. When I confronted my soon to be ex about this, his explanation was that he didn't take a hit, he put it up to his mouth and nose to smell to see if it really was pot. Still he did not put up fuss, punish our son, or kick anybody. Instead I find out about the pot from the sister of one of my son's girlfriend who told me because she was worried about her sister and she was the one who originally told me my husband took a hit.
Now, because my husband is angry that I have kicked him out and am filing for divorce, he is telling these lies and half truths to the cops and now I have to worry about getting visited from social services. I've been crying all evening and I'm wondering what I should expect. I have to clean my house from top to bottom, make sure this sucker shines and I guess not let my son have any friends over ever again!
I am so upset! I absolutely hate my ex-husband. I live in a rat hole as it because he has refused to work and he has junked up with all the crap he refuses to throw away. The man won't even through away magazines. I have stacks and stacks of magazines and newspapers that every time I've tried to throw out or recycle, he picked them out of the bins and brought them back into the house. Now I'm faced with this mountain of crap that I have deal with immediately before I get visited by the social worker.
I'm sorry to go on and on. I'm just so overwhelmed and stressed and I just want to curl up in a little ball and die. My kids are my life. I don't beat them, I feed them, I clothe them, I play with them, and have fun with them. They are the reason I work, the reason I breathe. The idea of having someone come into my home and question my fitness as a mother makes my physically ill.
You guys, thank you for continually listening to my saga. You guys gave me the strength to kick him out to begin with.
I have a question about Social Security and Medicare for people who don't work (sm)
My SIL has worked exactly 3 (count them) 3 months in her entire lazy life. They took bankruptcy a couple of years ago, of course she wasn't going to go to work and help out then because she said "it's not my fault we are in this mess." Now my brother is coming up to within 10 years of retirement and actually has problems with arthritis that may cause him to have to retire sooner. She insists that she should be given a social security check when she "retires" and that she should be eligible for medicare when my brother retires. She is several years younger than him and I tried to tell her she will have to get out and get private insurance for herself until she is of age. She insists the government "owes this to her". I would like to string her up to the highest tree, but I am told that is illegal also.
Am I crazy? She certainly can't be put on Medicare just because her husband is eligible can she?
I think she just figures she will either live on his SS benefits or kill him off with the side jobs in addition to his FT job he has been trying to do to keep her in the style she wants to become accustomed and then be eligible for widow's benefits.
I guess I really don't understand the SS and Medicare issues, just hoping someone could shed some light on this.
She simply REFUSES to work regardless of how much they have needed the money and/or benefits. Can't watch your soaps if you work all day and that is very important to her. GRRRR. Sorry to vent. Will go mind my own business now.
I stand corrected. Here's the info from the Social Security website...
Even if he or she has never worked under Social Security, your spouse at full retirement age can receive a benefit equal to one-half of your full retirement amount and can qualify on your record for Medicare at age 65. (If your spouse will receive a pension for work not covered by Social Security such as government or foreign employment, the amount of his or her Social Security benefits on your record may be reduced.)
Your spouse can begin collecting the benefits as early as age 62, but the benefit amount will be permanently reduced by a percentage based on the number of months up to his or her full retirement age.
Your spouse who is caring for your child who is also receiving benefits can receive the full one-half benefit amount no matter what his or her age is. Your spouse would receive these benefits until the child reaches age 16. At that time, the child's benefits continue, but your spouse's benefits stop unless he or she is old enough to receive retirement benefits (age 62 or older) or survivor benefits as a widow or widower (age 60).
If your spouse has also worked under Social Security--If your spouse is eligible for retirement benefits on his or her own record, we will always pay that amount first. But if the spouse benefit on your record is a higher amount, he or she will get a combination of benefits that equals that higher amount. It doesn't matter if your spouse starts getting benefits before, after, or at the same time you do--we will check both records to make sure that your spouse gets the higher amount.
If your spouse continues to work while receiving benefits, the same earnings limits apply to him or her as apply to you. If your spouse is eligible for benefits this year and is also working, you can use our earnings test calculator to see how those earnings would affect your spouse's benefit payments. (Your spouse's earnings affect only his or her own benefits; they do not affect your benefits or those of any other beneficiaries on your record.)
For Medicare, from that section it reiterates what I said...
Medicare is health insurance for people age 65 or older, under age 65 with certain
disabilities, and any age with End-Stage Renal Disease (permanent kidney failure
requiring dialysis or a kidney transplant).
Call a minister or hospital social service department - nm
nm
Oh, sorry, misunderstood. Listed under social hx, no mention of a health concern. (NM)
x
Definitely get a companion bird - they are very social and need company. Poor thing is lonely. nm
x
I agree - a mother is a mother and a daughter is a daughter for life sm
despite the problems they had, which i truly believe stem for anna's drug problems. obviously her mom wasn't too bad or she would not have raised daniel for a while. i think the mother wants her buried in Texas so the grave will be close enough that she can go visit it without having to come up with expenses of going to the bahamas to get there. although i contradict that too in poor anna needs to be buried with her son.
Yay for your daughter!
Glad to hear it!
My daughter did twice...sm
and everything did turn out okay. She was very concerned and upset of course but her doc was very positive with her, explaining that there are a lot of false-positives for some reason or another. Good luck to you and try not to worry. I know that is easier said than done though!
Yes, with my first daughter. sm
The test results were actually quite bad. I worked at a doctors office at the time and had the blood drawn there. When the results came in from the lab the four family docs I worked for called my OB and all five had a sit down, serious talk with me. I was extremely frightened, but knew I wouldnt do anything drastic if it was truely Downs. My daughter turned out 100% fine. No Downs. Nothing. With my next two daughters I skipped the test all together. I knew I would never terminate due to Downs, so I left it in Gods hands and skipped that part of testing. All three of mine are fine. That test has too many false results.
My daughter is trying to get me to try
Of course, she is a little thing, but she teaches at a high-stress school, and at the end of the day, she loves to go there. She has gained a lot of muscle which she likes and upper body strength, which she definitely needs. I need to give that a try.
I just went through this w/my daughter...
and yes what is attached is definitely alive. You need to get the small comb that comes with the lice kits and VERY THOROUGHLY comb through all the hair to get the remaining eggs out. If you leave even one egg it will hatch and start the process all over again. My daughter has long hair and I combed it daily, at least an hour at a time. After 10 days, use the lice shampoo again to be sure.
Get the same from my daughter-in-law
all the time, just delete them, just pro-war for nothing and not me.
My 12 YO daughter
I just had to brag about my 12 YO daughter. She and I moved into a new apartment a few months ago. A mentally retarded man, in his 50s, lives down the road. Most 12-13 YO kids won't be associated, or seen, with a retarded man....my daughter is different.
My daughter and I were outside playing catch last night when this man stopped over. She asked him to join us. He played with us for a couple of hours. She was patient, kind, compassionate and understanding.
I truly have an angel for a daughter.
P.S. On a side note, I did tell her I didn't want her to be with him when I wasn't around, etc....for safety reasons.
If that were my daughter.......
I would have marched up in that house and knocked him for a loop!!! I have three daughters and although they are still young I can't imagine anyone ever mistreating them!! As a mother, I can only imagine the heartache you feel for your child!! Thank God she is able to get out now b/c he sounds like a potentially violent person. If I were her, I would never look back and I would make his parents aware of his abusive and neglectful treatment even if they don't want to hear it!!!
My daughter has 1 and I
know she does not have this behavior out of hers- she has had hers for say about 2-3 years and he does little crazy things like snap at the air (nothing there), very loving pet.
daughter
My daughter works at a daycare and they are having an outbreak of hand, foot and mouth disease. Pretty contagious from what I gather. I'm not sure what kind of treatment, if any, is necessary. Unless she seems really ill, I think you can probably wait until tomorrow and call your pediatrician.
The daughter is 7. nm
!
what my daughter does
is 1) wait until they show readiness, 2) try to anticipate, and encourage a run to the potty,giggling all the way, and 3) makes it fun with lots of praise, and then when they are successful, she gives them 1 M&M. I know some will scream this is wrong to reward with food, but i doubt this will create big problems. My husband used to let the kids run around the house with no britches on and they were much more inclined to want to go to the potty -- but that really depends on their environment too...and personally, i don't think 2 is too soon for some kids, but it certainly is for others.
When my daughter was 13
she had her first period in August as well. (The day before school started....aahhhggg!) She did exactly what your daughter has done, nothing in Sept. and then every month since. She is now 14. Just a hint that you probably don't need, I keep a calender on my desk and put a "K" on it each month when she starts so I never have to wonder. Trust me, we all know in this house when it happens for her each month LOL!
daughter having sex
I understand where you are coming from to some degree. Kids nowadays are more worred about and active in sex than we were; however as a parent of a teenager and understanding that this can be an emotional time for you, I have to ask. Are you really this freaked out about her sex life because she is having sex, or because of who it is with? Yes, you may not like this guy but how long do you want her to stay with him? This hissy fit of yours will only cement her with him. Keeping quiet about him and making sure that your daughter realizes that BCPs are not enough protection for what is out there would be a really good place to start. I have discovered with my own kids that sometimes just letting them see people as they really are ends relationships that I disapprove a lot faster than nagging. None of us wants to realize that our children are growing up and making their own choices but they do and are. We have to hold on to the hope and knowledge that we raised them correctly. I think we all can say that we did things that we regret and that they were/are only made worse by over-reacting parents. BTW, that age old saying about if they want to have sex they will, really does apply and do you really want to lose your daughter over some guy?
I do have to agree also with the comment about you and your hubby raising a child...WHAT are you thinking? If you don't want her to "give up her life" because of a baby and she is on the pill, then I suggest you make sure that she is well aware of the other options. You will not be teaching her anything by allowing her have a baby and then raising it yourself. I know that I sat my child down and explained things in that we have "been there/done that."as well as the fact that we will not be paying child support for a child (I have two boys).
Yes, realizing that your "baby" is growing up is hard, but come on get a grip. She is 17 not 12 and you had to know this was coming especially if you have an older child. She is having sex, not as protected as you would want, not with someone you think is good enough, BUT she is not dead/ dying nor has she run away, right? There are way worse things out there to worry about then the fact that your daughter made a bad chose in who she wanted to have sex with. Help her with the proper protection, make sure the lines of communication are open and pray for her safety and your sanity!
Again, what really (other than your daughter)
gives you the right to insist?? I do not see where you have a leg to stand on. You are upset but not thinking things through- you only have control over your own self- not your daughter, not anyone in your family and really not this guy. I read your post yesterday and I understood when you talked about what you would like for him to do but insisting? He would have to be a wuss to go along with that and being as he has this criminal history behind him, does not sound like he would be pushed into much of anything. Why don’t you get some advice from a lawyer before letting anyone else know about the information you have gotten. Probably a good idea.
daughter
Good luck to you! As a mother of 4 I totally understand why you did this as I would probably do the same. I in a way understand why they consider this a weapon because if she ever got in a fight and decided to use it etc. I am sure your daughter is smarter than that but you know how they think. Maybe somehow you can work it out with the school that she can drop the keychain off to them in the office in the a.m. and be able to pick it back up before she leaves. That way she still has protection when she gets off the bus. WISH YOU LUCK!
My daughter has had 2 out of the 3
And she didn't have to have a Pap.
How old is your daughter and how
many children does she have? Does she work?
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