Makes me sick. They do have proof of abuse. PLUS
Posted By: polygamy is a CRIME. on 2008-06-03
In Reply to: Children in Texas finally reunited - just me
NM
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That makes me sick.
nm
It really makes me sick
that psychiatrists these days are so quick to say "just cut ties and get on!"
Have you tried couples counseling like suggested above? Or talking? Maybe speaking with a pastor? Is your husband expecting this or is it going to be a big surprise?
Don't just give up on your marriage. Just because it's not the fairy tale every little girl dreams of doesn't mean that it can't work out and become amazing. But it takes work. Lots of it. There is no such thing as an easy marriage.
Take care, and please, don't just go off of what your psych says!
This post just makes me so sick nm
x
Personally, this makes me sick
This lady (moron) now has 14 (count them - fourteen) children under the age of 7 (her other six children range from 2-7).
She is unemployed, which means she is now a drain on the California Welfare System, who already has enough of a problem with trying to support babies of illegal immigrants, This may not be an issue much longer, as CA is going broke. Quickly.
She has no husband. She will not reveal the father of these children. I'm sorry - I know that marriages do sometimes not work out. It happens, and sometimes, for various reasons, children have to be raised without their fathers. But to PURPOSELY bring 14 children into this world without a father for guidance and support, both emotionally and financially is just downright selfish and sick. How in the world is she going to care for these children? I've heard she is hoping for either a movie deal or maybe an A&E special. Lady, don't count your chickens before they're hatched. I personally hope she does not get any help from Pampers, Gerber or any other baby product makers.
I've also heard she has bled her parents almost dry.
One other thing - who is the idiotic doctor who implanted all eight eggs in a woman who already has 6 children? I have been thru the infertility bit. Unfortunately, due to the cost of IVF, which runs around $15,000-$20,000, we could not afford anything more than an intrauterine insemination, which did not take. He ought to be reported to the ethics board. Generally, reproductive endocrinologists do not like to implant any more than 3-4 eggs, wanting to avoid the risk of such pregnancies. I think the doctor just saw the $$$$ signs. He ought to be fined and lose his license, at least for a period of time. Any right-minded RE doc would ask how many children are already in the family. After finding out she already has six, more than likely, no more than 2 eggs would have been implanted. Who knows - maybe he was only seeking fame and fortune.
I only hope things turn out well for the children and she is a good mother to home and has a lot of emotional support from her parents, friends and family.
Just my 2 cents, for as little as it may be worth.
Fari is far but it makes a person sick though.
I have one living right behind me. He was a HS basketball coach and had an affair with one of the students. He bought the lot behind our house and built a huge 2-story Victorian 3000 sq ft and put it up for sale for 300K. I don't know who will pay that much for a house here though. He is living in it now. I have seen the pictures of the inside on the internet and believe me, he is living better than I am. My little 820 sq foot house right behind his looks like it may be the servant's quarters. LOL.
Guess it's true, it's not who you know, it's _____. Makes me sick.
Sick of snow...sick of cold...sm
that lil ground rat just HAD to see his shadow, didn't he! aaarrrggghhh.
Fabric softener makes towels softer, yes, but it also makes them less absorbent. sm
Which is, after all, the function of a towel, absorbency. :-)
Again, where is your proof that someone is being...
told to do anything?
What proof do you have? I believe in God, but not
NM
Pretty sure he's done that too - no proof (sm)
He admitted it once but then took it back immediately and denied it from then on. So are you still with your husband?
Please share your proof
of life after death with us. I am very interested and quite sure everyone else will be also.
personal proof? does it have something to do
did ya see a ghost or just have one too many drinks??
still I have no real proof of what he has done (sm)
I can't prove he cheated when he wasn't with that guy and I can't prove he opened the cards without my knowledge.
He can look at my debt and see it as a fact.
Nah, don't need proof, was just curious what you learned.
Nah, don't want proof, was just curious.
Ok so I didn't proof my message
You all get the point. We always alternating....hee hee
It's been a long week and it's only Wednesday!!
how to baby proof a house
First off, I am not being sarcastic....
Follow her around, fix everything, she touches and when she leaves the house will be baby proofed! :)
My 2-year-old son and I visited "great grandma" who had her pills by her TV all laid out. When no one was looking he ate them and we did not find out until she wanted to know where they were. He took one and a bite out of another, so we knew it was him. We were in the ER the rest of the afternoon. Luckily, it was just a mega dose of Lasix, so he just peed like a race horse for 24 hours. Those diapers weighed about 4 pounds a piece. She never did put the medicine away, and we had to train ourselves to watch him better at her house.
I am sure you have done an excellent job of getting ready. Have fun with your company!
You show proof of past income if you need to (sm)
and that should be enough - especially if you have excellent credit. I actually had a mortgage person tell me that self-employed people are basically stuck and can never make more money - needless to say I moved on to another company.
Proof positive that time-outs are nothing but
Maybe, but you are living proof that in today's world, -sm
you just never know. 'Once bitten, twice shy', and all that.
The scenario you describe may have been legit, but to me it sounds just TOOOOOO risky! Especially when there are more than one of them.
In these hard times, there are more robberies, muggings, carjackings, etc. than ever. Always be aware of your surroundings. Follow your gut instincts if you think something is not right as you walk to your car, and go back inside the store to ask for an escort. When you get in your car, don't dilly-dally - close the door and LOCK all your doors before you even put the key in the ignition.
They were old enough to know that women shouldn't give rides to strangers - period. They could have approached a man and asked him, or better yet, asked for bus fare money.
Women are best off only giving rides to people they know.
by the way "band" was husband" sorry, so upset over this I did not proof read.
nm
disgusting shows are proof of lack of intelligence of producers.
nm
I'd say yes they really did abuse
the 'emergency' but rather than contacting an attorney I would just try to recall where you might have given her contact information - call them and change ASAP and I would not even fill in that spot in the future citing your experience in these two situations and the problems it caused and if they fuss - give them a phoney name and addy and let it go. I think it is there for your safety really, secondly for them to collect should you not pay a bill - I have only been called once in my 55 years as my son got behind on his credit union car payment and they traced me down through 3 counties - so think you definitely had an unusual experience.
Abuse
Call your local shelter and they will advise you on ways to leave safely. NEVER take abuse - physically, verbally, or mentally from anyone. Forget the church kid, learn to love yourself, and lead by example for your children. If you act like a doormat, do not be suprised when you get stepped on!
You need a long time on your own before you are ready to think about entering another relationship. You are not out of your present relationship yet, but you can be if that is your decision. Best wishes to you.
Lilly
I think it is abuse.
Take the poor doggy into your house. Your cat may hide, but my guess is the dog will ignore the cat. I got my Sheltie when I had 2 cats and they all got along just fine. Please don't leave this poor thing outside, especially if it hot in your area. If you cannot bring it in, call the authorities. It is kinder than leaving her out to suffer.
It is ABUSE!
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This IS animal abuse. Thankfully, in most states animal cruelty is becoming a felony. In my state (NY) it can be punishable up to $5000. Animal abandonment is also a felony with one year in jail and up to $1000 fine. Failure to provide proper nutrients is another law that seems to have been broken.
Our animals needs protection from the elements, proper food and water (and not just a bowl to catch rain water,either) They also need love and companionship, and by this I mean not regulated to the backyard to vegetate.
Animals can think....how do explain service dogs, search and rescue, and guide dogs? Have you ever seen a dog given a task to do and watch him/her go through the paces to get it done?
As I stated before, contact an area dog club to see if they have members willing to help, or if they know of a Sheltie rescue who can help. Contact your area vets for such phone numbers. Or, you can contact me and I'll see if I can locate a Sheltie rescue that can help.
Abuse
Your post makes me very sad. Your husband is abusive. Husbands and boyfriends come and go in our lives; however, family is ALWAYS family. Please seek counseling for yourself. You cannot change him. After you become stronger through counseling, you will see the situation clearly for what it is - abusive.
Call your sister and invite her for a visit. Better yet, get a plane ticket and go see her. Don't ask, just do it.
Best wishes.
Lilly
Abuse
Every county has a program for abused woman and children. You do not have to be physically abused for them to help you. Find out the name of the program near you, Domestic violence, Reach, etc. You can call them and they will allow you to take your children and live in a house, the whereabouts is not known to anyone on the outside. It is free and they are very caring. You can start there and they will help see that you and your children are safe away from this maniac. Good luck.
There's always abuse
of the system. Making it illegal doesn't stop that. There are a lot of drugs out there that are, in my opinion, worse than marijuana as far as addictive qualities and doctor's prescribe those drugs routinely and easily for things such as back pain which is not life threatening but can be debilitating. I think it would be much easier to hold standards to legal medical use marijuana than it would to criminalize alcohol and the numerous other prescription drugs that are out there and abused.
it's abuse duh
x
Child abuse
That's your opinion - and pedofilia - obviously you did not BF or have a good bond with your children. Do you also consider it child abuse that I did not use disposable diapers? What about the fact that I worked as a wet nurse? Some things are just natural - You should read the book, The Family Bed - BF may be looked upon differently in the US - but that is only cultural - and I do not bend to cultural issues - I did as I pleased - and no one else cared or ever even discouraged me from BF my son as long as I did. Unless you've been there - you do not understand - sorry for you.
It is not abuse, but it is neglect
If you cannot take the dog in, I would definitely call the authorities. It is completely unfair and wrong for the dog to be left alone outside for that long with no shelter and no place to go. Who knows, maybe your cat and they dog will get along. I have 3 cats and a 128-pound German shepherd, and they call get along just fine together! But, if you cannot do this, just call the authorities for help/advice. I'm sure the dog would want you to do this so that it can get out of this situation!
Abuse causing this?
I had a son (I hear boys are worse than girls) who wet the bed until probably early teens. My aunt was a nurse, said NOT to belittle, get after, etc., etc. He definitely was NOT abused. Think children just do sometimes. I was told he would grow out of it and he did.
Sibling abuse
I picked up my 6-YO grandson today to bring him to my house for the weekend. When I got there I could tell he'd been crying and had a puffy bottom lip. He showed me where he had a missing tooth and said his 8 1/2-YO half brother (not my grandson) knocked it out. His mom sits on the couch and says nothing to dispute it, so I'm sure it's true. This brother is also his babysitter after school until mom and step-dad get home.
Not too long ago DHS was involved and step-dad was charged with abusing my grandson. Of course they always try counseling first before thinking about removing a child from the home.
I constantly worry about the environment he is in as I've seen the way older brother treats him, but never anything quite like this. At what point is it considered sibling abuse as opposed to normal fighting that brothers might do. Is this something I should report to DHS?
p.s. His mom is just beginning to speak to me again. She blames me for the last DHS thing even though I wasn't the one who reported it (only because I didn't know about it). Once I heard about it, I did go make a report about neglect that I'd observed. Then they were conveniently busy for the next 5 weekends so I couldn't see my grandson. It's a long story, but there is nothing in writing about visitation. I have pretty much had visitation with him every other weekend for the last six years.
What to do.
Sibling abuse
They're home alone 2 to 3 hours before parents get home. Parents are trying to save money, which is the only important thing to them. I agree entirely that he is too young.
The thing is, parents were home today when this happened. They were probably just getting up. They do not get out of bed before 10 on the weekend, even though kids are up at 6 or 7. I pick my grandson up at 10, and he has not had breakfast yet. This is the norm.
Child abuse, hardly
My child was circumcised years ago, did fine. Years later my 2 male grandchildren were not circumcised and as they were aging were running into lots of trouble, could not retract the foreskin because as they grew, so did the foreskin, could not keep the penis clean and finally at an older age (when more painful for them) had to get circumcised. Well known fact, smegma collects there and causes infection and could lead to worst things than just infection, has been linked to penile cancer.
no, not child abuse. what will they think of next? SM
How about - combing the tangles out of your daughter's hair (ouch)?
or ripping off a band aide?
or making them eat their vegies?
Please correct my catch a shoe to catch a show - didn't proof first
x
Or maybe it's all that substance abuse she admitted to
I know I don't look like that and I'm close to that age. :P
THIS IS CALLED ELDERLY ABUSE
And the courts see it as this. You can have abuse other than striking a person. Taking advantage, which this is, of a person her age is something that needs to be nipped in the bud not tomorrow but immediately. A person can have an excellent mind, no dementia but are flattered when they think someone is smitten with them. Family and children services know about things like this. She is in a position for the right person to take plenty of advantage of whether it is her money or otherwise.
blatant emotional abuse
You say he is out and about all the time with work or just doing fun stuff.
Talk to an attorney then, when he leaves the next time, have the separation papers filed and put his rear end out. He has probably already talked to an attorney if he is trying to talk YOU into taking the kids and leaving.
A judge is going to be more favorable toward keeping the kids in their home.
His abusive behavior toward you touches on the kids emotional health too.
Give him the boot girl!
What constitues animal abuse
I would like to know what you all think about this situation. Our neighbor next door has been gone almost 12 days. We just moved here so do not know them. The day they left there was a little sheltie dog that found its way to our yard and all weekend long laid under their truck and on their front lawn and ours. We gave it food and water, but it had no collar. Couldn't bring ourselves to call authorities as the life span is not long for strays. 3 days later it was gone, we assumed its owner found her or she found her way home. A few days ago we heard a dog crying and found her in the back yard of our neighbors who have been gone a long time but she is being given food and water. She has just been alone for almost two weeks and crying from only what we can assume is loneliness. Don't know our neighbors enough that when they return to say anything to them but I sure feel like giving them a piece of my mind. If we didn't have a cat we would have taken her in. It is so heartbreaking to think people don't think of their pets as anything more than a piece of property like an old shawl they don't know what to do with anymore. Just want to know what people think about this. I about cried myself to sleep last night thinking of how she must feel.
Boarding on abuse of the children
Ladies, you need to have a talk with these men. They are really abusing these children by running them down, waking them up from sleep? What gives with this? A child needs a lot of sleep anyway, more so than we do and why a person would harp on a child much less wake up from sleep to harp some more borders on nothing but abuse. The guys you are with need a wakeup call. Why are you letting them get away with this? They should find healthier outlets than what they have now.
It's only child abuse if you hit them hard enough
check with your CPS. There is a BIG difference between spanking and beating.
I don't automatically think spanking is abuse
said it was okay to give 'em the belt. That is abuse, plain and simple. If you feel a need to spank your child, then do it with your own hand, not another object. It's too easy to hit too hard with an object because you're not feeling the pain you're subjecting them to.
As for the gov't interfering, they have to because there are too many wackos in this world that do beat their kids to a pulp. If they all parented with a little more sense, like you obvioulsy do, then I would agree that the gov't shouldn't interefere, but unfortunately the wackos of this world don't care.
It sounds to me as if you're raising some wonderful children. You've definitely offered up some very good advice. I saw no where in your post where you said that you've used a belt, and I'm not saying that you did. I'm simply referring to the OP that started this thread that beating with a belt is abuse.
Here is why you DO NOT take an abuse spouse like this to counseling sm
BTDT a couple of times. He manipulated the whole thing to his "issues" with me.
He told counselor: She makes me angry. Counselor looks at me: Why do you feel the need to make him angry?
He told the counselor: I don't like her looks. Counselor asks me: I have you considered getting some help with your weight and looks (umm 140 at 5Ə"??? Where was the problem?)
He told the counselor: She makes this marriage about the kids instead of making it about me...I make all the money...I do all the work (never housework)...and she sits on the couch and eats bonbons all day (what is a bonbon?). THIS MARRIAGE NEEDS TO BE ABOUT ME and what I want, NOT about the kids. Counselor: Why do love your kids so much and why can't you put him first?
LOUSY counselor. I went to another one on my own who said: You may not have bruises, but you are being abused. I know the situation you are in and he forbids you to work and it isn't like you actually have the time. It may take you some time to choose to get out. So, lets focus on ways for you to be stronger until you can walk out the door. HE didn't get any better HE got worse as I started to develop a backbone.
So to all those who say go to counseling, stay in it, learn to be stronger, don't let his words hurt you...YOU ARE FULL OF IT. You all may like being treated the way that DONE is, but I don't. I am a person too, as is DONE. Anyone I might ever be with needs to think I am so wonderful, special, lovely, kind... you name it, they could not stand NOT to be with me. DONE'S husband is telling her, essentially...you okay I guess, but not that great. Plus which, you can't do anything the way I think it should be done. You don't have feelings because you are average looking and this marriage is all about me. Toro poo poo.
Some of you are not very bright, I am sorry to say, but there it is.
some advice about animal abuse
turn him in as soon as possible. People like that do not deserve animals. Someone ought kick him once in awhile.
Call the Animal Protection Society in your area immediately. I can't stand people who abuse animals and someone who knows this is being done and not doing anything about it is just as bad
You may have to report it but not as sibling abuse (sm)
Child abuse and neglect by the parents that BOTH children live with. The 8 year old doesn't need to be punished, they both need to be taken care of. The thing is, as you know DHS is not always going to fix the problem and if the mother finds out it was you, she will probably not let you see your GS again. That is a problem. I am not sure. Does your son have any type of rights to visitation, etc? Can he not go to court and say that his child is not being taken care of appropriately? Where is the older child's father?
Let me clearly state that this is abuse on many levels.
I'm another one who has BTDT...17 years ago, but when I read something like this, it seems like it was last week.
I remember exactly what my state of mind was when I finally was able to realize I had reached the end of my rope. That alone took me 10 years to figure out. I was overwhelmed with what lay beyond the escape I could not imagine being able to engineer. The fear was paralyzing. It would have been nice to have help and support, but I was so ashamed that I could not seek it or accept it. I ended up learning how to take my anger and turn it inside out. I transformed it into self-empowerment.
I am sure there are plenty of people who would like to help. You just may not know who they are or how to find them, but they're out there. Everybody's situation is different. It would be helpful to know where you live (town or city and state). I would be more than happy to help you gather some information, but need to know the geography.
Also, what kind of support system do you have beyond your household? How many kids? What about friends and family? Any possibility of staying with them, or would you feel safer being in a location your husband does not know about? If you are an MT, your job is portable....a huge help in this circumstance.
Share as much or as little as you feel comfortable with and see what we can help you come up with. This kind of thing probably has a better outcome if you have a plan (especially in view of your children and their schooling), but even without one, it can be done.
Let me be the first to assure you, life is really sweet once you get yourself and your kids to the other side.
I really feel that what she is doing is child abuse.
nm
your parenting style is really bordering on abuse
and what makes this so sad is the fact that your children are so young and cannot control what is happening to them. They are trapped in a world ruled by your iron fist.
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