Just spent an entire week in FL with brother sm
Posted By: Me on 2007-08-19
In Reply to:
and his whole family - wife - 3 kids. To make a long story short, my sister in law does not like me. I'm about 7 years younger than she is. She is very jealous of my close relationship with my bro. Always. This trip she made it very clear how much she does not like me at all. I cried a lot this trip. My feelings have been so badly hurt. I've never done anything to her personally - she just hates me. My brother was very standoffish this trip and I know why. He has a very jealous wife. They would just get up and leave and not tell us where they were going or invite us. They NEVER used to do things like that. The whole time, if ever I had a suggestion for dinner or entertainment she would shoot it down with, "I don't want to do that!" I'm talking everything I came up with. What's even sadder is that they have 2 girls - my nieces - 13 and 15 - who used to love and adore me - their aunt - and this trip they were so ugly to me. I haven't seen them in over a year. We stayed in a 2 BR condo on the beach. Pretty small unit. They got the master BR. While walking to my room one evening the 3 of them (sister in law and 2 girls) were just berating me in gossip - talking about what I wore to the beach, the way I styled my hair, just stup*d things. Just gossiping so bad about me. I wanted to cry.
After I heard that about mid-way through the trip, I completely shut down emotionally. I only spoke when spoken to, didn't suggest anything at all to do, and was cordial, but not overly friendly like I usually am. Today when we left, she walked right by me in the hall and didn't say a word. Got into the car and they drove off. I had already said by to the kids and my bro. I cried when hugging my bro. He had his sunglasses on - he probably wanted to cry to. We lost our dad growing up and our mom pretty much abandoned us. We've stuck together until he moved out of state and started his family. I did too. He gets along GREAT with my husband and my kids.
What compels women to act like this? I don't understand it. Why would you want to live in your own prison of hate and bring everyone around you down? I can't stop crying! My brother lives about 2,000 miles away. I want to be close to him and his wife and kids. She won't allow it.
I know I have to just accept this is life and the way it will be. I am having a pity party. Can I say this eloquently without you taking offense? I am hating women right now. No matter how kind and nice I am, I always get slapped in the face. Always. I am a very kind and nice person. My mom always said I had wishbone but no backbone. I guess I just expect others to be kind, too, and when they aren't, I get hurt and I don't understand it. 
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My DH spent his check and we have no money for food this week. :(
the jerk
I have a great brother like that too! I love my Big Brother!
Enjoy the love!
I have an older brother and younger brother
and I was a terrible handful, especially during high school compared to my brothers.
I wish we could all go the week of the graduation but their graduations are always a week earlier th
ours. So actually all three of my kids are still in school this week while all of hers will already be out. My youngest is actually missing school to go but my two older kids have finals so they can't go at all that week.
Thank you. I guess I'm just trying to find a nice way to say it without causing friction and keeping the peace.
My DH is your typical male, just deal with it when the time comes whereas I want to take care of things right away without hurting anyone's feelings.
have had this my entire life........
I had always gone for yearly mammograms and sometimes with bilateral hand-held ultrasound (my opinion is that the latter is better because w/ultrasound they always show up and not so with every mammogram). I have never needed a breast biopsy either. I am older now, breasts much less *dense*- a word that the MD always used - and I do not go yearly but every other year. BTW, no family hx for me of breast cancer. Try not to worry.......you can Google this too if you'd like......
OMG you just described my entire marriage..
I am waiting for tax returns and I am OUT OF HERE!! We tried counseling, and for US, it just made it worse. We have 3 children..7, 8, and 10. They are sick of him too and have actually BEGGED me to get us out of this house. I know in my area there are a lot of "programs" to help in these situations and I am hunting them down!! Good luck to you and dont sacrifice your life to be unhappy.
Even if you can't pay the entire quarterly tax
owed, I would at least send in something. Are you employed with taxes being withheld? You can also have extra held out for your federal and state for that matter. Even if it is only $20 a check, it would make a big difference.
Thank you all so much. I spent about 6
hours last night researching this man and his family via Google and MySpace. I am horrified at what I found - its a troubled family for sure, but they look great on the outside - no what I mean? The house is perfect - the guy is OCD about working in the lawn, etc. Always the appropriate holiday decoration - yet underneath the exterior they are monsters. I found the teenage daughter's MySpace and read thru postings all over, on other friends' boards, etc., and this kid has threatened to do physical harm to many kids - she alludes to bombings, and her screen name has her name followed by Kills. She has lots of posts about bomb threats at her school and sounds bragging about it. Her town name she chose has comments on bombing. Wonder where the kids are getting it from? This is way sicker than I ever imagined. I am mounting my evidence, documenting all this stuff, and just praying that nothing happens to me or my family. I would love to move - just isn't a possibility right now. I am going to research the nursing tonight, but sure got side tracked on the MySpace stuff. The mother/wife even has her own sick site. Its unreal. And its unreal how easy it is to find people on that place. Oh well. Will keep you all posted.
I spent over $64.00 on
green queen sized olives yesterday, eat them like candy.
So glad I did not have them their entire lives
because I had already raised my children and did not need to be raising stepgrandchildren and especially ones that had been left to fend for themselves and did not know how to cut up a piece of meat to eat it, no manners, nothing, took to Walt Disney World and they had never even heard of Snow White and 7 dwarfs but they sure knew about reefers, killings, rapings, etc. This is how they were growing up. I thank my lucky stars I am not in that situation anymore. I know personally of not only the neighbor who gets a check for her son being diagnosed as attention but also my cleaning lady, she also knows how to work the system, so she tells me and from what she has told me, I firmly believe it. Lots of people working the welfare systems yet.
I have watched this entire thing...sm
and yes, it does distress me and I feel so badly for those involved. But I guess I am one that wants to know why...about just about everything, I guess. It is not an *entertainment* thing, but an understanding thing. On the news last evening, they had a psychologist explain the difference between a psychotic person and a psychopathic person. Of course, he fit the latter, and according to this psychologist (a woman), this person was a psychopath by the time he was eight years old. That is truly hard to imagine! All of this is truly hard to imagine, but it is a part of life, as much as any good things that happen. The newscaster was defending their posting of this kids diatribe on the news by saying that if it elevates people to the point of correcting the wrongs that let this thing happen, then they felt it was worth it to air it. However, they did admit that perhaps airing it over and over again was not a good thing. Once would have been sufficient, and they also said that *copy cats* were reported after EVERY newsy story...i.e. there were some suicides recently, and suddenly a lot of copy cats showed up, etc. it is not just with this tragedy, but with all tragedies that are depicted on the news, internet, or other media sources. It just cannot be avoided. We cannot go back into the fifteenth century and not be aware. We HAVE to be aware, so we can learn how to cope in today's society. Hiding our heads in the sand is not going to stop it. There are other ways to prevent these things from happening and it is up to all of us to find those ways. Unfortunately it takes something like this to motivate others into creating change.
Would be nice if you read her entire
post. She was thinking it was now, not a couple of years ago. Gosh this is like passing on a story. The story just keeps getting twisted all the time and variations on the same story.
Have you watched the entire video of
Susan Boyle singing for the judges yet? The look on Simon's face and the other judges is priceless. I have watched it twice now and am just blown away. Her reaction to her own performance back stage was great!
In the early 70s, maybe 1972?, my entire
family got what was believed to be the swine flu. I was young and barely remember it, but my parents said they've never in their lives been that sick. I don't want it...
that is really sad - spent my honeymoon on
Padre Island - guess the beaches went the way of my marriage - down the tubes!
I was out before 8:30 and spent about an hour
shopping- I do not like to shop at all and mostly this morning bought things for me, like some flannel PJs and some sweaters at the outlet store. The crowd not bad at all- only 1 ahead of me in the checkout. I shop over the net quite a bit but had received flyer and things I wanted I got.
Some time spent with them would be
a gift only you could give.
Last month I spent $321 for 3 of us.
It's just DH, 18 year-old son, and I. We live in the Philadelphia area. We generally eat far less meat than most American families, but we aren't vegetarian. My son commutes to a nearby university and works there, as well. He provides his own lunches, and probably only eats breakfast at home half of the time.
Now, if you want to factor in what we pay for the meal plan for our son who lives away at college, well then... that's a whole other story! KA-CHING!
She extends her entire body and scratches every
door jam almost like she is marking everything as her very own. She is an older cat, so declawing is not an option. She is not an outside cat, but we have always felt that if we declawed her and she did happen to get outside that she would not be able to defend herself. She is a very good cat other than that like I said. She does claw the furniture a tad, but not as bad as the door jams. I can't even tell where she has clawed the furniture. She actually just leaves more dander on the furniture than actually clawing, so I guess we are lucky in that regard. She just really keeps me company, and I try to say "no" and scare her away from the door jams, but we have allowed one that she can scratch, which is in the entry to the area where her litter box is kept in the basement. We may be confusing her though. Thanks for all of your help. 
no, it was an entire roof (read threads *S*)..sm
power walking......see link here:
http://www.thewalkingsite.com/howtowalk.html
TIPS FOR WALKING FASTER1. Use good posture. Walk tall, look forward, (not at the ground) gazing about 20 feet ahead. Your chin should be level and your head up.
2. Keep your chest raised, and shoulders relaxed (shoulders down, back and relaxed).
3. Bend your arms in slightly less than a 90 degree angle. Cup your hands gently. Swing arms front to back (not side to side - arms should not cross your body.) Do not swing elbows higher than your sternum (breast bone). Swing your arms faster and your feet will follow.
4. Tighten your abs and buttocks.. Flatten your back and tilt your pelvis slightly forward.
5. Pretend you are walking along a straight line. Resist the urge to elongate your steps. To go faster -- take smaller, faster steps.
6. Push off with your toes. Concentrate on landing on your heel, rolling through the step and pushing off with your toes. Use the natural spring of your calf muscles to propel you forward.
7. Breathe naturally. As you walk, take deep, rhythmic breaths, to get the maximum amount of oxygen through your system. Walk fast enough that your breathing is increased yet you are not out of breath.
WALKING DON'TSCommon mistakes made by walkers... 1. Do not over stride
2. Do not use too vigorous arm movements
3. Do not look at the ground
4. Do not hunch your shoulders
5. Do not carry hand weights or place weights on your ankles
What is the difference in power walking, fitness walking, and racewalking?
Fitness walking is called by many different names - power walking, fitness walking, health walking. Power walking is commonly used to represent an exaggerated walking style. This style of overstriding and exaggerated arm movements is often linked with injuries. Because of this I don't generally use the term power walking. A better term for a healthful energetic walking pace is "fitness walking".
Fitness walking is much more than a stroll or nature walk. When fitness walking you incorporate the muscles of the upper body making it a GREAT aerobic activity. It burns approximately the same calories as running, yet it is much easier on the body. Because more muscles are used it burns calories much quicker than less aggressive walking. It also tones muscles in the buttocks, thighs, hips, shoulders, upper back and abs. Most fitness walkers average about 12 to 15 minutes per mile.
Unlike racewalking; there is no official definition. There are no rules. If you walk at a purposeful fitness walking pace using good technique you are a fitness walker. Use tips above to insure good walking form and to increase your pace.
never touched Kook Aid in my entire life....
.
Not using the entire bottle of something and just opening full ones! SM
I have quite a collection of shampoo bottles with about 3/4 inch in the bottom!! Makes me mad at myself!
mine's been going through menopause his entire life nm
wal-mart...polaroid dvr...ebay...okay dokay
Money spent and nothing to show for it
I paid a little over $600.00 for a dinette suite the first of April. They had to order and I called time and time again and finally told the store in August I wanted my money back. No reply. I took out a small claims against the company and the guy did not even show (although he got the complaint because he called me at home and said "I had fallen thru the crack." Yeh- right ! Anyway, by this time had bought another set and asked for just the return. No response to the file and now have gotten a judgement just for his not showing up. I am given a list of several things to collect my money, i.e. file Fi. Fa. which places lien against losing party and any property they own, 2) file garnishment against his paycheck, 3) file garnishment on his bank acct, 4) levy against real and person property (this I would have to contact lawyer for) and lastly turn judgement over to attorney or collection agency for collection. Please, anyone have any ideas on what steps I should take? I would like to not have to spend a lot of money if possible. Thanks
I probably could have spent my time, money, everything
on me because I gave them so much and now it came down to money. One is a me type person and the other, if all they care about is the $$$ and would talk nasty to me, I can wipe my hands of anyone and I mean that, who does not respect me after all I did for them. Most of the posts you read here are mothers who have younger children and most are ok when babies, toddlers but the real life comes as they get up and supposedly have some sense. I did my job and thought I did a good job. Now time for me, me, me.
I have a MIL who was jealous of any time I spent - sm
with my family. It caused a lot of hurt feelings on her side, and just made me angry for the most part. You don't sound anything like my MIL though but it sounds like you did not push the issue and fight for the right to see your grandchildren. In my situation, I married 1 of 2 sons. The other has never married or had any children. We have the only grandchildren for my MIL. She was manic that we have kids though she was vastly disappointed when we had girls and has remarked on this several times in the past. It is true we trusted my mom over her in terms of childcare, etc. though my mom rarely watched the kids as she lived 4 hours away. I did visit my mom at least 4-6 x a year, but I would drop in and visit my MIL and my FIL almost every time as I literally drove right by their house on the way up to my parents. My DH rarely calls his parents, I usually call his mom once a week and chat for a while. She used to never call but lately has taken to calling every 2 weeks or so. We also used to see his parents at least once a month for at least 5 years (now it is every 6-8 weeks), day visits, while my parents only saw the kids 4-6 x a year, though I would stay anywhere from 2-5 nights when I visited. This where the jealously came into play. I was/am very close to my parents and my brothers, much like your DIL I suspect. But I was exceptionally close to my mom, when she died almost 3 years ago my world fell apart. But my MIL was always jealous of my relationship with my mom, it drove her nuts I think. My DH tried to explain to her how close were were but she just could not understand and it caused her (and me) many problems. I would catch such grief from his family when I told them I was going to see my parents/friends, it was as if they wished I did not have a family. Holidays were horrible though we did do an alternating schedule though she would argue with me about that. Things a lot different now as she now gets to be the only grandma, which I am sure she loves. My stepmother is actually better with the kids though and has a great time with them, though I will never be close to her either. My in-laws get just about all the holidays now since my mom is gone and my stepmom wants to be with her kids not her husbands, so I don't get so see my family much anymore, maybe 2 x a year. Much more complicated these days, though we still don't let them (my in-laws) have the kids as they lack in common sense bigtime when it comes to what is safe and smart for my kids. I am not saying that is the case with you as I don't know your particulars of course. But it sounds like you just gave up. I would not try buying your son's love as it sounds like you did try. I know my in-laws tried though we were up front with them with one money gift they gave us that enabled us to pay off our truck in 1 year instead of 4, that it would not buy them weekends with the kids, etc. We told them that if there were strings we did not want the money. Money does not buy love as the Beatles said, very true. I would write back your granddaughter and say you would like to have a new beginning with her and the past is over and done with , and if she ever does want to know the real story, tell her. As for your son, have you even called him and invited him to your new home, it does not sound like it. Sounds like you expect a lot and are upset because they don't do the same for you as they do for the daughter's parents. The daughter controls the kids for the most part (as do most women) so it is to be expected that her family gets their "favor" more. You need to step up and be assertive. My in-laws do do most of the visitings here (we have actually never invited them here, they just call us and say that they are coming down on such and such a day, kind of aggravating), we rarely go up there as my DH just hates going there and really does not like his parents due to a bad upbringing. They really did a number on him. Does your son have any anamosity towards you? Did something bad happen in the past? You are long overdue for a long talk with him though. But I work hard to keep the lines open with them as much as I don't like doing it, I do it. My kids love them and I would never deprive them of that. I hope you take the first step and write to your granddaughter again, and call you son. You have absolutely nothing to lose at this point. Good luck.
how I spent my Monday morning...sm
Just wanted to say how much I missed this community while I was away...take a look at the picture I've linked...that's my neighborhood during our mandatory evacuation from the Marek Fire in California... Didn't know if I should post this here or on the mental health or prayer request boards LOL! Grateful to have my home...and my home office...next time you dread Monday morning...keep this as a reminder to renew your perspective! javascript:editor_insertHTML('text','');
We paid cash, spent about
$1000 total for grandkids and gifts for each other. We are debt free except our house. There is nothing like being able to sleep well at night and not be afraid to answer the phone should it ring. We have lived this way for many years, have learned to save money, pay cash for what we want. This has been to our benefit as we haven't had our CC companies drop our limits or increase our percentage rates at all; in fact, our limits keep rising even though we only use them once or twice a year. The thought of having to pay for something many months and years later is baffling to me.
Howard's Vicodin. If your entire message won't display, then why
do they give you all that space??? STUPID!!!!!!!!!1
I found my entire family tree including
dates of birth and marriages, complete spouses names, etc., for me and my 3 siblings on someone's web site. Kind of scary that my DOB and full birth name, married name, spouse's name and our marriage date was on the 'net! (plus my parents, cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents, on and on). This site branched out into 6 different families and was traceable to the 1400s! So much for trying to hide from the stalker it took me 6 years to get away from!
Perhaps an entire cable channel devoted to multiples?
xx
Perhaps if mother Spears spent more time
parenting and less time pimping her kids all over Hollywood, this might not have happened.
Save your money, other ways better spent
NM
spent NYE playing Rock Band for PS2
a lot of fun though discovered I'm never going to be a drummer (or a singer) :) So I guess I won't quit my day job.
I'm avoiding the entire holiday shopping insanity this year. - sm
My family and I have all reached the point where it's nearly impossible to find anything that the other person would really like or can really use. The last years have been just the stupidity of us all trying to buy gifts on a limited income, which after all the shopping-mall challenges, wrapping challenges, and Post Office lines (as everyone is scattered all over the country), just to send each other things that end up being white elephants, we discussed it and said, 'Why are we doing this?' I had come to dread Christmas time like no other time of year. Even tax time was better!
So instead, last year we said enough of this commercialism is enough. We just kicked back and enjoyed the season. Went to the ice rink in the city and looked at all the lights on the buildings. Wrote cards (with actual LETTERS in them, not just printed names & greetings, which in my mind are a waste of postage), donated toys/gifts to kids or families who really could use a Christmas gift, and maybe got a few small things for close friends. I cut my Christmas card list down to just a few close friends who live far away, family in other parts of the country or the world, and skipped all the ones on the list who haven't bothered to return a phone call, note, or email in the past 5 years.
I spent Christmas Day with my best friends, then decided to go climb the hundreds of steps up the steep hill to Coit Tower in the city, and marvel at the view of the bay on a clear winter evening.
It's amazing how stress-reducing it's been to give up the Holiday rat-race. A few years ago I 'went AWOL' from everyone and everything on Christmas Eve. Drove up to one of the smaller & less-crowded Sierra ski resorts, Dodge Ridge, which is kind of out in the middle of nowhere up in the mountains, at the end of a dead-end road well off any main highways. After a nice day of skiing, I timed my 2nd-to-last run so that I was the very last person to get on the chairlift before they closed it down. Once at the summit, with the sun starting to set (and my ears turning numb in the wind & snow), I took my time adjusting boots, poles, etc., so that I'd be the very last one down the mountain. And much to the consternation of the Ski-Patrol making their last day's sweep of the mountain to make sure everyone's gotten down okay, I took my sweet time doing that, as well, and was rewarded with an incredible sunset off in the distance in the West, even though it was still snowing lightly on the mountain. And it was incredible to be able to go swooping down the runs alone, without any other sounds or skiers.
On the drive back home, the clouds cleared and there was a huge full moon - (I believe someone said the last full moon on Christmas Eve for 30 years?) It lit up the snow in the canyons like it was almost daylight, and I pulled off the road a few times just to enjoy the view and the silence. (A TRUE 'Silent Night'!)
:)
wrong...he spent 4 years in korean schools
Do you mean the actual hours of school. or also time spent
ol
Spent 2 hours with my kids playing that today - fun! nm
x
If father thought child support was not being spent
x
This entire country is scary...surprised people still leave the house.
x
Getting there early and staying late, time spent on phoning
il
I have the best brother ever!
Tonight my brother called, said he loved me and he knew I was struggling to catch up after being laid off and would I accept his gift to help me catch back up. I love my family.  It isn't like he has money to spare really but he got a really nice bonus and wanted to share it with me.
My brother and I also won sm
a Halloween costume competition when we were little. He for my original costume (He was a hobo)and me for prettiest costume (me, what else, a princess)My mom was a whiz with the sewing machine. Funniest thing, We had the same last name as the anme of the department store that sponsered the competition. I assure you we were in no way related, but I bet no one else belived it.
Big Brother
Did anyone watch Big Brother last night? Did you think Julie Chen looked awfully skinny. I did not think she looked good at all.
Big Brother
Who out there watches Big Brother? What is wrong with everyone this season? They all seem so emotional. It is so funny to watch. No one gets along. Can't stand Jen.
Oh brother!
a
My brother's got one. They ALWAYS
Why not put $500.00 away in a bank account and then take long weekends or splurge on a huge trip? I don't see where you're saving money really, plus someone's padding their pocket somewhere. :(
My brother
was a wild one when he was 15, hung out with an older crowd and so on. But he straightened out in his early 20s when most guys his age were still barhopping. He ended up getting his GED and now he is a Fire Capt. I think some kids go through those wild years a little earlier than others. I would not be comfortable with him hanging out with a 23-year-old though. Makes you wonder what the older guy's motivation is hanging out with a young teenager. Good luck.
Big Brother
Is anyone out there as disgusted with the results of Big Brother this year? I cannot even watch the last one because it will make me physically sick to see either Daniele or Evel win. Daniele is the biggest baby I have ever seen and Evel is the meanest person I think I have ever seen.
Big Brother
Oh, I was disgusted with how it turned out last night. I bet there are a lot of people out there that feel the same way. I won't have to worry about missing the next show.
Big Brother
I love ED.. He is just being realistic. You do what you gotta do when you are in a game like that. It always amazes me why people get their feelings hurt.. They are there to win the money and that is simply all. Waste of time otherwise. I am glad he won.. of course, his daughter will get the money because of the hate people feel for him... The truth hurts sometimes.
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