It sounds like you might have depression.
Posted By: Kiki on 2009-03-02
In Reply to: Midlife crisis - think i'm having one
Maybe you could see a doctor? Talk therapy could help, especially if you work at home and don't get a chance to talk to *adults* much.
If you can't/don't want to see a doc (and you think it could be depression), you could try a supplement called SAMe (can get it at Target). Do some research about it on Google. It has helped some people. It's not too expensive and supposedly it starts working fast so you'd know if it were going to work for you before you spent too much.
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- Midlife crisis - think i'm having one
- It sounds like you might have depression. - Kiki
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IMO definitely depression
I think people get freaked when you say depression because they think of Grapes of Wrath or what our grandparents talk about what they went through. They say "Oh that'll never happen here" - "Gas at $3.00 your nuts, that'll never happen to us". I think that as long as they don't cancel American Idol people don't care. I talk to siblings they have no idea of what's going on in the economy but they know the statistics of all American Idols or Survivors. It's sad. I definitely see a depression coming. First, gas prices are soaring. People can't afford it. If they can't afford it they can't get themselves to work, or they work OT just to pay for gas to get to work (when OT is available). Food prices rising. Reports of food shortages in areas, jobs being shipped overseas. Then the wierd weather patterns I also believe somehow affect the economy. To me I see a major depression hitting us. Also I do read a lot of websites (the kind that my family thinks I'm into conspiracies - that is until they start hearing the same news I'm telling them about, they just hear about it months later and pretend I never told them anything).
depression?
Okay so they say, finally, that we are in a recession. I am thinking that we may be going into another Great Depression. Call me doom and gloom but come on now, look at life. So, my question is to those of you who stock up on stuff. What do you stock up on and how do u do it? I mean, do you go out one day when you grocery shop and just spend a fortune on extra stuff or do you spread it out. Also, those of you that mentioned being stocked up, obvious it limits grocery trips and probably saves some money here and there but if we face a depression, do you think that there will be a huge shortage of food in our grocery stores?
depression
Ladies, help me out. What physical conditions can cause depression or mood swings? For the past few months I have been experiencing bouts of depression that seem to come out of nowhere and hit me like a ton of bricks. Within the span of 5 minutes I go from feeling normal and content to feeling like life is completely meaningless and hopeless. This is completely out character for me. I have always had a positive outlook, very even-tempered, and don't even get emotional around my period. The year 2008 was one of the most stressful years of my life and there is still a lot of stress going on so I realize it could indeed be that I have reached my emotional limit, but if there could be a physical cause, I am willing to entertain that as well. Thanks for any insight.
Do you think he could be going through depression maybe? sm
Depression is an illness and it can definitely make you lose motivation or desire for anything. Just a thought.
I wonder if he has depression & if
depression meds would help pull him out of his funk so he could be at least motivated enough to get out & work? I fight depression & don't feel like working, but of course I do it because I have to support myself, but maybe he has a greater degree of depression?
On the other hand, I had a relative like this, and as long as anyone would hand him money, he wouldn't do anything to help himself. When people would cut him off, he'd work a while... My husband & I decided after a while of that that we would feed him when he came over to eat because we always have leftovers anyway, that we would quit handing him money but would never let him go hungry & he was welcome to eat with us anytime he wanted, but that would be the extent of it.
If he already owns a dump truck, he should be able to at least do a job here & there & get by though. I know men who would love to own their own dump truck!
There's no easy answer & I feel for you.
Depression after surgery
My Daddy went through the same thing after he had heart surgery. He would not go to a psychiatrist or counselor. We spoke with his primary care physician who put him on Paxil which helped tremendously. Ask your PCP or cardiologist if it would be possible to start him on an antidepressant to see if that may make a diffence.
Good luck and take care.
I don't think the depression meds --sm
should be taken in conjunction with pot. Anger and anxiety issues were already present prior to father's death. He may be grieving on some level, as his own psyche will allow, but sounds more like an excuse to me. I have lived with these types in the past. His lack of ambition is probably due to the pot, as well. Thinking of the child, I feel that separation from the source of this frustration would be the best thing for the boy. Counseling rarely works for the spouse, but it would probably benefit you. Go with your gut reaction on this as to what is best. You live with the man, and you know more about him than what you can post here. Trust your instincts. Good luck to you.
Could you be suffering from a depression?
Maybe go to your doctor and ask for an exam regarding your symptoms of being tired and wanting to always eat. Those are signs of depression. Are you on an antidepressant? They certainly have helped me.
Jan
Even postpartum depression.
I had a friend who was not even the same person after she had her second child. She was afraid to go out in public and would field all her calls through her husband and had never done anything like that before. We tried to go out together one day and she made me turn around and take her back home.
It turned out she had postpartum depression and after some time, therapy, understanding friends and short-term medication, she was fine.
Of course, the added stress of the baby's physical problems could easily account for a reason for the depression.
People have told me that one of the best things they appreciate from a friend is a sincere card or letter expressing empathy and concern. They like being able to read the sentiments again whenever they are down. Just a word of caution, always re-read such a letter before sending it to make sure there is no hint of something that could be taken the wrong way.
Recession/depression
I think we are at a "stuck" point, where it could shoot up or fall down into a rescession. I hope to God, it shoots up. I heard gas isn't coming down til after the first of the year (2009)
recession/depression
I think Michigan is already in a recession. It is just sickening to see all the homes that have been foreclosed. Everytime you watch the news or read a paper it is just more people losing their jobs. I don't know how much more people here can take. Hopefully things pick up soon!
PPMD/depression
I have depression. Right before my time, I get terrible. I am taking sertraline (Zoloft) right now all the time. While I was asking my Dr. about this medication she mentioned to me that some woman only take it for PPMD and/or up the dose during that time. I am actually considering going back to her and asking about this because during my time I get irritable and sad still.  I hear ya!!
Best Description of a Depression
I really think the movie "Cinderella Man" gives a good and accurate portrayal of the Great Depression.
depression era music
jazz age
http://dismuke.org/radio/
With depression you lose either way -- sm
depression pretty much kills sex drive, but so do antidepressants. Still, I prefer to be on the meds.
Anxiety and depression are two different diagnoses
Sometimes they co-exist, sometimes they don't, sometimes long-term suffering of one will create the other. Some are situational, some are chemical. Family docs now spooning out SSRIs like candy have blurred them into a generic diagnosis with a generic fix, IMO.
While I totally agree re. depression...nm
to poster above who has done a fine job and counsels others on getting money into the bank, the stark reality is that no matter how much $$ one has in the bank, when depression hits - and it will - all that money isn't going to amount to a hill of beans that was covered by the floods in the upper states. The dollar bill has little value now, so when the depression hits none of it will be worth anything. Best stockpile on canned and paper goods (TP will be at a premium, I'm told by financiers) now with that $$ in the bank 'cause that's all you are going to have!
A few suggestions on beating depression.
In the same boat gave good suggestions for the medical care part. I strongly urge you to consider an anti-depressant and/or an anti-anxiety medication. They are not addictive, do not turn you into a zombie and will help you tremendously in every arena, especially work. You could try OTC St John's wort. This did not help my depression (it seems to run in my family and I think mine is hereditary) but I have friends who say it has helped them. It is possible your depression is being aggravated by SAD (seasonal affective disorder).
Make sure you are getting plenty of sleep. If you have trouble with insomnia, another really good natural remedy for that is melatonin. You find it in the vitamin section of the drug store. It is inexpensive and is not habit-forming. There is no set dosage. They come in 1 mg and 3 mg tablets that can be split. Start with the 1 mg and increase by 0.5 mg until you reach your ideal without hangover effect in the a.m. 3 mg is what I typically take, but have taken as much as 4.5. Again, insomnia runs in my family and it is likely your dosage would be less.
Exercise helps with depression A LOT. This does not have to be strenuous or extreme. A 20 to 45 minute walk 3 times a week or more will do WONDERS for you. Biking is great also and in the summer, swimming.
Here's something else I strongly suggest. I know it's a hard one, because I am a mom too. Stop trying to take care of everybody else for the time being and put focus on helping yourself. Find things you enjoy doing that do not cost money and then DO THEM. This can be difficult at first. Take baby steps at first. Make a modest plan for a day off, wake up and PRETEND you are not depressed, then put one foot in front of the other. Read books, watch favorite TV shows, surf the net, window shop, light candles and incense and soak in a hot water tub with soothing bath salts, listen to music, pot plants using cuttings, cook a delicious meal, change your hairstyle, experiment with make-up and new clothing styles (go to stores and try them on), start a journal or do a little research on a new hobby. Sometimes even housework can be therapeutic. Whatever you do, be very kind to yourself and do not beat yourself up if you don't get as much done as you would like. The road back takes time and practice.
Get proactive about your job. Look for work at home with a company with insurance. Make up your mind that you are going to kick this depression, not the other way around.
Only if you've never suffered from depression and
Walk a mile or two in my shoes before you go judging me, or anyone else who's been helped by antidepressants.
Can you get him to the PCP? They can handle this type of depression most times -nm
:-)
Our stories are very, very similar. Due to my severe depression sm
something horrible happened which I cannot speak of here. It is the main reason I found God, so you and I are alike in that matter.
As for God rescuing you like that - that is amazing. I guess we can just agree to disagree on this one. He saved you by showing you meds and saying it's okay to take them, and He healed me from my ailment without meds. Who is to say one is better than the other? That is why the saying goes that God works in mysterious ways!
I am happy for you! Continue to do what you are doing. I am not judging you. I only spoke to NCMT through my own experiences. We all have our own experiences.
either postpartum depression or embarrassed/guilt
I have known people to withdraw due to feeling like people are going to make fun of their child, blaming themselves or postpartum depression. Is this their first child? Could be that she is just simply overwhelmed. What does her mother-in-law/mother think? Is she also pulling away from them?
Just let her know that you are there for her even if that means sending her a card.
POLL: Are we headed for a recession/depression?
Do you think we are headed there or already there. Some people have told me they think it is going to get really bad like during the great depression. opinions?
If your mom and dad just divorced this year, have you ever thought of depression? sm
Maybe your dad is going through a real hard adjustment to his new life and could use a little help or boost from you instead of a cold shoulder. Sounds to me like he might just be in some major depression as his life has had a drastic change. Reach out to him and help him in his time of need. Sure he is an adult, but everyone can walk on hard times with major traumatic events going on in their life and he may just lack desire to care due to his depression.
Depression/Menopause/Decreased Sex Drive
I was wondering if any has any suggestions for increasing a woman's sex drive. I have been on Wellbutrin and trazodone for years and now I am going through menopause on hormone replacement. (I am 47 and had an ovary removed last year which caused me to go into menopause.) The last few years my sex drive has decreased to almost nil. Any suggestions/information would be much appreciated.
Anybody's hubby went through Open Heart Surgery and can't get out of depression?
I seem to be having a big problem with mine. He wasn't too bad after surgery, but since then, there have been a lot of house problems. i.e., water , septic system problems, roof leaking, my car not passing inspection so down to 1 vehicle, etc., etc.
He feels he cannot handle it anymore. He'll sit in our garage for hours on end doing nothing, but knowing he should be doing something. Yet, everything he does lately, does not solve a problem and he winds up doing something else for the same problem. It never bothered him before except ot get him mad he didn't do it right the first time (does anybody understand what I'm saying here?). He's feeling very "old" and incompetent but nothing I do or say is getting him out of this depression.
I'm afraid for him but don't tell me to make an appointment with a psychologist or psychiatrist...he would never go. He's losing interest in eating, too, and even fixing his favorite foods depresses him because he thinks it's not made the same.
Anybody have any suggestions? I don't know what else to do lately. Thanks fo the help.
Haven't you heard? We're in a recession and/or depression?
so, why would there be a raise in benefits if there is no inflation?
The risk of suicide is greater in people with depression anyway sm
I personally have suffered from depression for most of my life, and the only time I feel "normal" is when I am on some kind of antidepressant. It takes time and a patient understanding doctor to work with you until you are on the right one at the right dosage, but I strongly feel that it is irresponsible and dangerous to tell someone not to take an antidepressant if they need it. You don't go telling diabetics that they shouldn't take insulin because people taking it are more likely to have high blood sugar do you? Makes about as much sense to me
Regular exercise helps, too, but watch for depression if you're
s
Many meds for depression and mental retardation make people very SM
heavy. My friend has gained probably 75 pounds or more since being on some of the meds. Don't know quite why they contribute to weight loss, but one commercial some years ago said that it does something to the part of the brain that senses when you are full. . . . .
..:) Depression glass, cut crystal, candle sticks, figurines. Strings of twinkie lights
s
You may be, from the sounds of your posts, sounds like an *illegal*
and that in itself is a crime. Nobody else would take 65.00 for an entire day slaving/laundry, heavy cleaning, etc. LOL. Nah, I don't think so. I'm just saying, what it sounds like to me. : )
He sounds wonderful...sounds like you two have a relationship (sm)
based on love and nothing superficial at all. I'm glad you appreciate him and are so grateful for him. Best wishes & continued happiness to you both :-)
Sounds like you are doing everything right...
Hang in there. It sounds to like you are doing everything right. I totally agree that kids are under too much pressure these days and that they certainly need to be given more time to just be kids. Being a single mom I try make sure that my children grow up to be responsible adults with good morals and values, but I also make sure that they have their space so they have a chance to make their own choices (when possible) and see the consequences of those choices. Being a parent is certainly not easy and doing it in today's society is stressful to say the least.
As for your neighbor, I think she could take some lessons from you. Good luck and keep your chin up!!!
Sounds to me like . . .
she has the attention she wanted, it's almost like you took her bait. She sent you nasty Emails and now you are begging her to forgive you. You know the the saying "Don't cast pearls before swine". Sounds like she can more easily respond to the negative rather than the positive. Anyway, what would you do if she forgave you? Be her friend again? Until she changes her heart, you're better off, keep your distance. She sees your goodness as weakness. It's probably fun for her to make you uncomfortable. Maybe deep down she is jealous of you. Don't hate her, be sad for her. Don't fall into her games.
sounds like a CC I used to have, which did--sm
pretty much the same thing. They said it was their *annual fee* and, like you, I just paid it to keep the peace and close the account. Personally I think it is a scam just to get a few more dollars out of you, but how do you prove it and who do you complain to??? I don't have credit cards any longer either. Learned my lesson too. what a rip!
Sounds like (sm)
your FIL has two abled bodies to care for him already. Why should you go back? It would probably be nice if you checked in once in a while and took your 2-year-old to visit, but moving back sounds like it would put a strain on things. Your husband may be feeling guilty and feels the need to "help". Explain to him that helping is taking some groceries once in a while or offering to pick-up meds, etc. You, your husband, and child would be probably a breath of fresh air once in a while if you were to just visit on occasion. Moving back seems a little like overkill, but it is tough because when it is family you want to give it your all! Also, there is one in every family that "freeloads". Let them figure it out for now. Hope your FIL is feeling better soon and hope you can find your way to be helpful without having to sacrifice your new home.... Take care and good luck...
sounds mean . . .sm
but when my daughter and husband were pulling that on me I told my daughter it was not safe that she could die very easily in the front seat or get hurt very badly. She quit asking, daddy quit doing it. Now she is 12-1/2 and no problem there, she is 5Ƌ" and weighs about 130 pounds. But I used to get SO FRUSTRATED!!! Daddy's little girl . . . .
Don't know that one, but it sounds sm
like a good time. if you are in for an evening away from the parks. I have friends who own Sleuth's dinner theater. Three theaters, dinner included, plus one is only for kids, I think. You enjoy a great dinner, and a murder mystery play, where you take part in solving the mystery. It is right on Universal Drive and I think the website is sleuths.com
sounds like your going to anyway.
but i would urge you to proceed with caution, go very very slowly. When it seems too perfect, too good to be true, it may be wrong. One of my first thoughts is that if he is the spiritual man you think, ie, Christian, he might not have had 2 divorces -- not always the case, but often times. you both need to know what your own faults are and be careful to not make the same mistakes. More than anything (outside of knowing each other very well, nonintimately) is have real committment on both sides, the determination to stay with the marriage. i married a man with 2 divorces too -- 25 yr later we're still married. But it was sheer determination to make it work on my part, lots of prayer and such. I did endure what one should not have to, to get to this point. Once i was into it, i certainly understood how come he had been divorced twice. Wishing you the best.
Sounds like now as of this a.m.
Apparently the so-called lawyer owns a business called Hot Lips Smoochy or something like that and has never tried any cases at all. He is apparently the executor of her estate. Now isn't that convenient? He tells the photographer Daddy that she lost the baby, but she winds up having a baby anyway 9 months later. The photographer breaks it off with her because she is drinking while pregnant. Oh my, the gossip. She looks like she's all drugged-up on any interviews I've seen, and I saw one last night from 3 days before her death. She is wearing dark glasses for the first part (inside), and they go outside, and she takes the glasses off. Makes no sense. I don't know, but what does Granny want with the baby now? That poor baby! So many Daddies?????? I have never seen men trying to prove they ARE the father in all of my life? Twists and turns this story has, which I'm sure has the producers in Hollywood salivating. There will be books and there will be moves. Life happens, I guess.
It sounds to me like you are not even willing --sm
to compromise on this and want everything YOUR way. What arrangement does HE want? Do you even know? You never said what HE would like. It is just my opinion, but it does not sound like you are even ready to get married, if you cannot find a way to compromise on even this small detail. Good luck to you.
Sounds to me like you were just being
very thoughtful, and I bet he appreciates you as much as you seem to appreciate him. What a wonderful thing!
She sounds like quite a gal . . .
especially the part about being a practicing Buddhist. She probably marched to the beat of a different drummer. The doctors might have saved her but who knows what quality of life she might have. My mom, dad, aunts all were healthy until their 80s. They end up in a nursing home. My aunt is 90, she's really been dying for a year, they keep on prolonging it. I think death at some point may be a blessing. You're going through a mourning process. Your tears are for you, you'll miss her, she'll be in a better place. You are going to have to brace up and take comfort in your faith.
Actually should be It sounds.....nm
nm
sounds like my SIL
We had a chow years ago. We raised him from a pup and he was very protective of all of us but especially the kids. ANY kids for that matter.
The kids in the yard, someone comes up the driveway, he was there. Would not let anyone get between him and those kids. Didn't matter if they were our kids or their friends. He never bit anyone but he wasn't going to let anyone take "his" kids either.
Never did that to the parents of the kids either, just total strangers that he didn't know. For Chow's, he had an exceptional personality and never saw him so much as growl at anyone. He would bark but would back away as he was barking.
My SIL's chow is a rescue so who knows how he was raised.
She just sounds like someone who has --sm
to pick and pick until she starts an arguement. Try to ignore her. If you don't give her what she wants, she will go away. just my opinion.
sounds like it to me . . .
I've seen two physicians recently, one who specializes in anxiety, and they think the crude policy under my current company of having to "make up" any time I take off is burning me out, promotes physical and mental self-neglect and is fueling an anxiety disorder. "That's sick," is actually what one said, and put me on a mild anxiolytic temporarily and told me to find a way out. The company says "everyone else does it" like I'm some kind of freak or bad MT, but in talking to other MTs there I'm finding the majority saying no they're not or they are frying themselves out doing it and have also complained about it. Having to always "make up" a day off is not a day off and does not promote rest. I'm having to learn to take the doctors' advice I'm typing for, letting go and taking care of myself. :-) The consequences of not doing so are much more dire. It kills me they have an EAP program. Seems to me investing in just letting people have a life would be more efficient. Recently bought out, the new company acted like it was a plus to keep this crappy policy. Yeah, right.
I'm really, really close to singing "Take this job and shove it . . . " Shame, because it's an otherwise decent company, um, unless you want a life.
Watching all my family enjoy this weekend as a 3-day weekend while I type. Sometimes I wake up and cry before starting work because I feel like I can't get a break from this job without consequences.
WORDS OF WISDOM: When applying for an MT job, ASK CAREFULLY about the EXACT way "time off" is calculated and quiz their MTs, not the administrative people who have never done MT. What looks good on paper . . .
Sounds like they don’t have a pot to
pi..s… in. These sound like grown folks and I do not consider myself a bank, therefore do not loan money out even to my grown KIDS. Only could a child move in with me if they were sick and unable to take care of their own self. Sounds like they have no responsibility about financial business. Sorry they would just have to do things on their own. Loaning money (or giving it away, whatever the case is) only makes relationships strained. I do not sign as collateral for anyone, do not take stray folks in, do not run a banking business.
sounds
That sounds very pretty. You can also do just a border around the top of the wall with the sponge paint effect. That way it keeps it from being too much green!
Sounds to me like
although getting paid, maybe not the right 1 to be trying to watch the kids. I am a grandmother myself. This sounds like she is irritated by their actions and maybe they did kick her more than you OR maybe with her older legs it just hurts her more. My legs now are a lot different from when I had children as far as the aches and pains, even bruises and sometimes cuts just show up without your knowing where they exactly came from. Yes, she is offended they said something about her legs (even though on the 7 year old I would know probably too young to really understand what the veins were) but she is getting back at them now and trying to get her point across - even if they arent understanding she is trying to make them understand. I don’t see this as a really workable situation. It has been 2 weeks and already everyone at everyone else. Not a good situation. Pretty soon grandmom and kids just doing tit for TAT at each other. Maybe a good sit down and talk it over or else grandmom goes back home and you get someone who is a little younger and able to corral the kids better?
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