It's my daughter's name too! I love the name!
Posted By: Poster you responded to. nm on 2007-06-19
In Reply to: Kristen is my fav too, that is my daughter's name. nm - trose
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If you love your daughter and she loves
you, this will be solved. But, I would not change the way I am. I would try to talk it over with her. Are there specific problems that cause this estrangement?
I mean, your daughter is no teenager anymore that her behaviour could be excused.
There are children who will always see in the mother first of all 'the mother' and not 'the friend'. And sometimes this is caused because the mother always acts as a mother toward her children.
I think your daughter should mellow down and respect you as her mother and show her love for you, same with you. There has to be a way to achieve this, communicate and compromise.....
Tough Love advice. My 19-year-old daughter is making me nuts..
I don't even know where to start with this one but I'll just to give a short summary. My 19-year-old daughter has been troubled since I can remember. For example, her terrible twos went beyond that..if you didn't peel her orange right, she didn't want it and would throw it across the room. I think her diagnosis is best described as ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder) and bipolar. She has a quick temper and at age 5 blackened her 12-year-old brother's eyes with a book because he got in her face. She has annoyed everyone she has come into contact with. She is very immature. We have tried everything to get her help because once she became a teenager it just got worse. She is self-destructive and I became the enabler and now it is out of control. She would not go to school so she does not have an education. We had to call the cops numerous times because of her violent outbursts. We had her arrested when she stole our credit cards so she could learn a lesson but the courts did nothing. She was supposed to be court ordered to have a job and attend school, of which she did nothing and there was no punishment. She has never suffered any consequences no matter how hard we tried. She was charged with 10 felonies for the credit card theft but got nothing. She just batted her big blue eyes at the judge and it all went away. I have paid her rent for a year or two, bought her a car and paid for it. All of these of course when she had a job but right after I did all of this she stopped going. She got into meth..You would not believe my heartbreaking nightmare. Some days I just don't think I can take another minute of it. At this point, she is now homeless because I just cannot keep paying her bills. She just totaled the car so she has no car and no job and still wants me to pay her way and she has lost her license due to DUI and driving again without privileges. It never stops. How far do I take this? She calls me for money that she says is to eat but if I keep giving her money then what is her motivation to go to work. I kept thinking if she hit bottom she could only come up..but she likes the bottom and just hovers there. She adapts to any environment. So when does she wake up and do you think tough love would work on a child with mental issues. I paid all of her doctor bills so she could get help and on medication but just found out she hasnt been taking them. I know I have so many questions but I have no idea how to "fix her" anymore. I know she needs to help herself but how much is she actually capable of being on drugs and mental health issues. This is devastating to our family and when I don't help her she becomes suicidal and I want to just hang up because I know she is manipulating but what if this is the time she really does something. I tried to take her into the hospital because of her meth addiction because she finally asked for help and was told there really wasn't any programs for her because she didn't have insurance so I left just thinking.."well, I guess you'll have to do it on your own, there is no help." Now, that is heartwrenching. At some point, I know she just has to grownup, but I don't know if I can survive this. I'm stressed 24/7 and sadly whenever she calls I get such bad anxiety. I can hardly be around her because she is so manipulative and I feel guilty that I try to avoid her. I always thought it'd be different if I just loved her more, spend more time with her and so as a mom, I blame myself because she is so messed up. Guilt just fuels the enabling.. Help.. any suggestions, advice??
My precious daughter, Becca, gave me a kitchen wash cloth and two lollipops. I love it! She was ab
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Daughter's phone is daughter's responsibility. Valuable lesson learned.
It should be between the daughter and the friend if the friend is going to pay any of the fees. They are teenagers, not preschoolers.
I LOVE love love shallots! I use them in everything that calls for an onion and/or garlic. Mmmmmm. n
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American Idol - Love, love, love Adam!!!
I think he'll make it til the end! At least I hope so!
I agree - a mother is a mother and a daughter is a daughter for life sm
despite the problems they had, which i truly believe stem for anna's drug problems. obviously her mom wasn't too bad or she would not have raised daniel for a while. i think the mother wants her buried in Texas so the grave will be close enough that she can go visit it without having to come up with expenses of going to the bahamas to get there. although i contradict that too in poor anna needs to be buried with her son.
My niece had a Yorkie, the love of her life! We all loved her so. Lots of love in store for you.
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Love movie "A Christmas Story" when dogs eat the turkey and they go out for Chinese. We love d
nm
She's sweet. I think she's gorgeous. Love her hair. Love her sm
smile. I wish I looked that great! I don't even come close, so who am I do judge? I admire beauty greatly in other women...I envy them!
sweet....love the heart charm, he's got love.
nm
God bless you on your path, all love begins with self-love, so you are really on your way.....sm
We should have less time putting needless labels on things, paying attention to dividing lines, and pratice more love, understanding, and humiility....we will all have things to answer for, no one is perfect, but I believe we are all precious and loved by the Lord, who knows all hearts, and has infinitely more compassion and mercy than ANY of us can comprehend. Be happy and take care of yourself, sexuality is such a small part of who we are in this world, but you have to be happy and at peace.
I love the animal channel, really love it and
my sweetie and I both watch but I absolutely, even if I know nature and the balance of, want to see small animals being killed and eaten and so forth. I know it happens but I either change the station or pick up the paper and read or find another way so I don’t watch. Also watch Discovery, love animals and love those shows!
I love you! hahaha I love your response! You can come over here sm
and kick my butt the next time I "allow" my husband to make me feel crap for whatever reason - which there seems to be many - he wouldn't complain if I made more money than him because his lazy behind wants to stay home and do nothing all day except to play golf. He tells me all the time, "when are you going to own your MT business so I can golf all day."
But, he is very mean, also. He hurts my feelings constantly and doesn't even care. He makes me drive around in his truck with bald tires and I don't like doing that for fear of a blow out and he'll just tell me, "well, don't go anywhere then." We have the money in the bank to get new tires, but he won't get them.
I love your comment, though!
And for all of you who will say, "well, leave the jerk!" It isn't that easy. We have 3 boys and I would be homeless. I only make 300 every 2 weeks MTing. We have a lovely home with a lot of space and besides him living here, the kids and I LOVE it and love each other so much.
Well, I LOVE a challenge too, Would love to debate this one day with you! sm
haha
Seriously, I was a staunch atheist for 20+ years. It's funny, though. I, too, believe that we are all electrical energies and that energy doesn't "die" and so, theoretically, where does your "electricity" go when you die, i.e., your spirit? I believe that "energy" within us is our spirit life - and that must go somewhere, right? It doesn't just go into the groun - which is what I thought for so long.
Anyways, when I learned about our "energy" and how it must go somewhere, I was really testing the waters of Christianity up to that point. After hearing about that, I was convinced that there must be an afterlife. I believe we go either of 2 places.
Anyways, I love ALL people of all religions, regardless of what I "think" or "believe." I don't think any less of you because of your beliefs! If I were to believe in a God who forgave me and loved me in my mut and mire, who am I to judge and criticize those who think differently of me?
I've always liked you no matter what your philosophy on life was....
Love people who love dogs.
nm
I love the dressing and I love lemon pie..sm
My mom's lemon pie that is. I also love this dessert called Texas Delight or some people call it different things but is is layers of chocolate pudding and cream cheese and whipped cream. The food is my favorite part besides the watching my son open presents on x-mas.
Young love/older love
I think it has a lot to do with your age and his. I married hubby at age 59 and he was 49. Best thing I ever did but say if you are 30 and he is 20, hmmm in that case might not be so workable. What are the ages here?
Give her love, love, love and if she...
doesn't want medicine - don't force it. Does she like to be stroked or does she like her belly rubbed? You better than anyone else know how to make her feel loved. Give her that. If her times comes before Monday, all the better for you and her. She'll die peacefully in her loving home. But, if not, be prepared to give her the last loving gesture you can - if it's time to, than let her go.
I had to put my 13 year old Lab down two months ago. It is one of the hardest things to do. But, you'll know when it's time. My dog, Shadow, told me he was done, tired, beat. He sent me the message quite clearly. But, still I waited, not for him but for me! Finally I "heard: him and did what needed to be done. I sobbed for hours and then just suddenly stopped, I realized I was crying for me - not for him! He had had a wonderful loving home with "mom and dad and brother". He was old and tired and wanted to rest. He deserved that rest! So, it's done. Yeah, I'm still sad. But I know that it was the right thing to do. And, yeah, call me nuts if you want - I know that when it's my time that Shadow will come running, knock me over, sit down on my chest and lick me silly!
Now, I'll go and give my cat lots of love and remember the fun I had with Shadow. My thoughts are with you - make the best of the time you have with your loved one's, be them human or furry! My thoughts are with you.
We will all pray for him. Your love and God's love will keep him SM
strong until he is home! 
It is better to love and have lost than to not know love at all...
Who do you really love? This is not meant to sound rude, but to make you think...if you felt like ending your life and acted upon it because you loved someone so deep but they did not feel the same way, do you think that ending your life is really going to make them love you anymore? No...now you mentioned your mom and family, would they hurt more if something happened to you? I have entertained thses thoughts before and girl, he is not worth it. The main ingredient in Love is YOU...you have to love yourself first. My situation was different but you know, love is love. We can not make another being love us. We give them too much power. If he is gay, let that be him sinking in that ship alone. What I mean by that is to give someone yourself is one of the most precious gifts, but knowing that they are giving to Tom, Thomas and Timothy is very demeaning to you. No matter how much you want him to touch you, it is good that he isn't. DISEASES, don't discriminate, nor does death. Please my friend, listen to your inner feelings/thoughts and know that you will survive, but only if you believe.
Yay for your daughter!
Glad to hear it!
My daughter did twice...sm
and everything did turn out okay. She was very concerned and upset of course but her doc was very positive with her, explaining that there are a lot of false-positives for some reason or another. Good luck to you and try not to worry. I know that is easier said than done though!
Yes, with my first daughter. sm
The test results were actually quite bad. I worked at a doctors office at the time and had the blood drawn there. When the results came in from the lab the four family docs I worked for called my OB and all five had a sit down, serious talk with me. I was extremely frightened, but knew I wouldnt do anything drastic if it was truely Downs. My daughter turned out 100% fine. No Downs. Nothing. With my next two daughters I skipped the test all together. I knew I would never terminate due to Downs, so I left it in Gods hands and skipped that part of testing. All three of mine are fine. That test has too many false results.
My daughter is trying to get me to try
Of course, she is a little thing, but she teaches at a high-stress school, and at the end of the day, she loves to go there. She has gained a lot of muscle which she likes and upper body strength, which she definitely needs. I need to give that a try.
I just went through this w/my daughter...
and yes what is attached is definitely alive. You need to get the small comb that comes with the lice kits and VERY THOROUGHLY comb through all the hair to get the remaining eggs out. If you leave even one egg it will hatch and start the process all over again. My daughter has long hair and I combed it daily, at least an hour at a time. After 10 days, use the lice shampoo again to be sure.
Get the same from my daughter-in-law
all the time, just delete them, just pro-war for nothing and not me.
My 12 YO daughter
I just had to brag about my 12 YO daughter. She and I moved into a new apartment a few months ago. A mentally retarded man, in his 50s, lives down the road. Most 12-13 YO kids won't be associated, or seen, with a retarded man....my daughter is different.
My daughter and I were outside playing catch last night when this man stopped over. She asked him to join us. He played with us for a couple of hours. She was patient, kind, compassionate and understanding.
I truly have an angel for a daughter.
P.S. On a side note, I did tell her I didn't want her to be with him when I wasn't around, etc....for safety reasons.
If that were my daughter.......
I would have marched up in that house and knocked him for a loop!!! I have three daughters and although they are still young I can't imagine anyone ever mistreating them!! As a mother, I can only imagine the heartache you feel for your child!! Thank God she is able to get out now b/c he sounds like a potentially violent person. If I were her, I would never look back and I would make his parents aware of his abusive and neglectful treatment even if they don't want to hear it!!!
My daughter has 1 and I
know she does not have this behavior out of hers- she has had hers for say about 2-3 years and he does little crazy things like snap at the air (nothing there), very loving pet.
daughter
My daughter works at a daycare and they are having an outbreak of hand, foot and mouth disease. Pretty contagious from what I gather. I'm not sure what kind of treatment, if any, is necessary. Unless she seems really ill, I think you can probably wait until tomorrow and call your pediatrician.
The daughter is 7. nm
!
what my daughter does
is 1) wait until they show readiness, 2) try to anticipate, and encourage a run to the potty,giggling all the way, and 3) makes it fun with lots of praise, and then when they are successful, she gives them 1 M&M. I know some will scream this is wrong to reward with food, but i doubt this will create big problems. My husband used to let the kids run around the house with no britches on and they were much more inclined to want to go to the potty -- but that really depends on their environment too...and personally, i don't think 2 is too soon for some kids, but it certainly is for others.
When my daughter was 13
she had her first period in August as well. (The day before school started....aahhhggg!) She did exactly what your daughter has done, nothing in Sept. and then every month since. She is now 14. Just a hint that you probably don't need, I keep a calender on my desk and put a "K" on it each month when she starts so I never have to wonder. Trust me, we all know in this house when it happens for her each month LOL!
daughter having sex
I understand where you are coming from to some degree. Kids nowadays are more worred about and active in sex than we were; however as a parent of a teenager and understanding that this can be an emotional time for you, I have to ask. Are you really this freaked out about her sex life because she is having sex, or because of who it is with? Yes, you may not like this guy but how long do you want her to stay with him? This hissy fit of yours will only cement her with him. Keeping quiet about him and making sure that your daughter realizes that BCPs are not enough protection for what is out there would be a really good place to start. I have discovered with my own kids that sometimes just letting them see people as they really are ends relationships that I disapprove a lot faster than nagging. None of us wants to realize that our children are growing up and making their own choices but they do and are. We have to hold on to the hope and knowledge that we raised them correctly. I think we all can say that we did things that we regret and that they were/are only made worse by over-reacting parents. BTW, that age old saying about if they want to have sex they will, really does apply and do you really want to lose your daughter over some guy?
I do have to agree also with the comment about you and your hubby raising a child...WHAT are you thinking? If you don't want her to "give up her life" because of a baby and she is on the pill, then I suggest you make sure that she is well aware of the other options. You will not be teaching her anything by allowing her have a baby and then raising it yourself. I know that I sat my child down and explained things in that we have "been there/done that."as well as the fact that we will not be paying child support for a child (I have two boys).
Yes, realizing that your "baby" is growing up is hard, but come on get a grip. She is 17 not 12 and you had to know this was coming especially if you have an older child. She is having sex, not as protected as you would want, not with someone you think is good enough, BUT she is not dead/ dying nor has she run away, right? There are way worse things out there to worry about then the fact that your daughter made a bad chose in who she wanted to have sex with. Help her with the proper protection, make sure the lines of communication are open and pray for her safety and your sanity!
Again, what really (other than your daughter)
gives you the right to insist?? I do not see where you have a leg to stand on. You are upset but not thinking things through- you only have control over your own self- not your daughter, not anyone in your family and really not this guy. I read your post yesterday and I understood when you talked about what you would like for him to do but insisting? He would have to be a wuss to go along with that and being as he has this criminal history behind him, does not sound like he would be pushed into much of anything. Why don’t you get some advice from a lawyer before letting anyone else know about the information you have gotten. Probably a good idea.
daughter
Good luck to you! As a mother of 4 I totally understand why you did this as I would probably do the same. I in a way understand why they consider this a weapon because if she ever got in a fight and decided to use it etc. I am sure your daughter is smarter than that but you know how they think. Maybe somehow you can work it out with the school that she can drop the keychain off to them in the office in the a.m. and be able to pick it back up before she leaves. That way she still has protection when she gets off the bus. WISH YOU LUCK!
My daughter has had 2 out of the 3
And she didn't have to have a Pap.
How old is your daughter and how
many children does she have? Does she work?
My daughter has ADD
She is not hyperactive, but has an extremely hard time staying on task. She will daydream, watch the butterflies out the window, count the number of times the girl sitting across from her breathes a minute, etc.
She is in third grade and has been on medication for 2 years now. She struggled all through first and second grade and at the end of second grade we had her evaluated. she has a cognitive processing disorder and ADD. Basically, she can see it in her head but it is hard to get on paper. If she can hold it or actually do it, then she can learn it. It is hard for her to read a story and take a test on it, because she has not actually done what the story says, therefore she has not "learned" it.
We noticed a huge difference once going on the medication, but the school also made some accommodations in the classroom. She gets some extra time to take a test if she needs it, she can take her test away from the rest of the class if she needs to, her teachers have been wonderful about giving her extra one-on-one support and giving us materials to study at home.
I certainly do not endorse medicating every child who is just very active and talkative, and this was a huge struggle for my husband and I to commit to putting our daughter on medications. We said we would try it for a few months and if it worked, great. if it didn't, then we would take her off the medication. It was literally like night and day. She can sit still longer, she is able to finish a problem without getting distracted, she can think clearer, etc.
She calls them her magic pills. She tells us they have helped her to think better and it is easier to listen.
You didn't say how old your son was. Is he in elementary school?
Hey.....my daughter
is in that show!
My daughter uses that a lot
I can't stand it either.
Me too, even though it's actually my daughter's
We got it for our 9 y/o for Christmas and we've all had so much fun with it! We're all actually hurting today because we've been playing it every night! I whooped my DH at baseball, bowling and tennis last night - WOOHOO! It's great though that we can spend all this quality time together on a video game system and we haven't sat down and watched tv in days either. I can't wait to get the Fit one either. I saw it's out in Japan (I think) but not here yet. Definitely the best Christmas present that we can all enjoy.
Get this - my daughter
 is 38 (only child) and the older she gets the more "name brand" stuff she wants. Would you believe a Hermes twilley ($150!) and perfume that cost $100! Is she spoiled or what?? But I love doing it!
My daughter wet the bed until she was 11
As she as she hit her 11th birthday it stopped just like that. It was very frustrating. She was a very heavy sleeper and when I tried to wake her up she wouldn't budge, and then when I did get her up she was so disoriented that she would think she was in the bathroom and try to go to the bathroom in the floor in her room. I took her to a urologist and she did have a problem with her urethra that corrected itself as she got older. She was even on medication for a while. Of course, from what I read of your situation it's a lot more complicated than when my daughter went through. I would try to see if I could have him checked out by a urologist to see if there's a medical problem that can be taken care of with medication. My pediatrician told me not to worry about it because it was something that would be outgrown. She was very embarrassing for her. She wore Good Nights for a very long time and we had an incident at a sleepover at our house where all her friends found out, but they were very supportive. Just try to not make it seem like he's doing something wrong.
what about your daughter's
was he involved? were you married?
that would be her daughter, right?
pretty sure that was, ****** or ***...A-something-y.
Edited: Names
My son is now 17 and daughter is 15
and I promise you it is not all bad. Some of the things my kids come home and tell still shock me, even in this day and age, but I am fortunate that my kids are involved in many activities, have wonderful Christian friends, and we are a very close family. There was a girl (a senior) recently telling everyone she pregnant and was keeping the baby. She has a very prominent father. About a week later she said she made it all up. I do understand no matter what kind of family life she has (a good one) girls do unexpectedly find themselves pregnant, but I tend to wander if something was done about the pregnancy and she was told to tell everyone she made it up. I also can't imagne telling the whole school which is basically what she did. Okay, I know I have gotten totally off topic, sorry. I just feel like as parents my DH and I are trying to do everything right (DH is coaching DS high school tennis team even as I type this) and it is possible my kids still might make "major" mistakes. I know mistakes are going to happen, how else will they learn, but I can't help but wonder if I am fooling myself sometimes. Sorry so long. I still hope you call the school.
When my daughter was 9 she had
her one and only cavity. When her dad asked her about the shot before they filled it she said she didn't get a shot. We all got a good laugh over that one. This reminds me of the third time I took her in to get her teeth cleaned. She was about 6 and had never had any trouble in the past. She actucally kind of liked going to the dentist. On this particular visit I had to sit on her legs to keep her still. She screamed and cried. I expected them to tell me to never bring her back, but the dentist was just wonderful. After it was all over another dentist jokingly said "Would you like a valium?" I said "How about 10" I still don't knowwhat the problem was but she has had her teeth cleaned twice a year since (she is now 15) and we never had another problem. Go figure. LOL! Don't sweat it, it really isn't that bad at all.
How exactly is your daughter going
What does your child need money for? You say it's for her, but I bet if you ask her, she'll tell you she really just wants to get "back to normal". Dragging her through court will not help her overcome her fear of dogs. Instead, you should be concentrating your efforts on having the dog impounded. Soon you will be known as the neighbor "quick to sue". You'll find other parents will not want to invite your daughter to their houses, etc, because they'll be afraid if something happens to her while she's there, you'll sue. I'm not saying that you would, that's just how some people might perceive you.
I got the impression from your original post. You said very little about the emotional details of the situation. You primarily discussed the money aspect of it. If I've gotten the wrong impression, I'm sorry. I just didn't get much else from your post. You even mentioned you watch People's Court and other court shows. These shows put ideas into people's heads that they constantly have to sue.
My kids play baseball. They get hit with baseballs all the time when they're up to bat. Do I have the right to sue the parents of that child who hit them? How would that help them?
Daughter sm
We don't discuss this in front of our daughter. We have contacted animal control, but they have done nothing about this dog, absolutely nothing!
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