Important addition to MIL problem directly below this posting
Posted By: Sue on 2006-11-18
In Reply to:
Oh, by the way, 3 weeks ago my DH told my MIL that I was upset with her and why. She made light of it, explaining that she was just "joking" and "being funny" and of course she didn't mean anything by it.
If it were my son telling me that I had offended my DIL in some way I would call her immediately and talk it through. However, my phone has not rung yet, and I'm pretty sure it's not going to.
I can see her sitting over there coiled like a king cobra expecting me on Thanksgiving and I'm so uncomfortable just thinking about it.
My husband said that she was just joking and to suck it up (again), and just go over. I'm really stressed out about this. Any suggestions would be great.
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Important to check source before posting/forwarding these types of emails and misinformation
Please, actually GO to www.snopes.com and read what they have to say about this negative e-email that has been circulating for months now. Right there at snopes, they debunk/clarify all of these mean-spirited accusations.
Specifically about it being factual and verified by snopes, it is NOT verified by them. Below I copied one paragraph from snopes.com but please go there read it in full so that you can hopefully choose not to pass on this Internet e-mail full of misinformation.
FROM snopes.com -
Variations: One version of the e-mail in circulation claims "We were told this was checked out on 'snopes.com'. It is factual. Check for yourself." and includes a link to this web site. It's our guess that whoever included that bit was counting on folks to not check, as our article says the opposite: that the polemic is not factual but rather is false.
Me again - Even if you do not care for Barack Obama, surely you do not wish to pass on lies or misinformation and engage in or extend the negative campaigning we all hope to NOT see much of... at least, I hope this is true, especially of people who talk about being Christian.
At least open your mind enough to read what Obama has to say about all of this misinformation. Between snopes.com and his own website, then make a decision whether or not to engage in actively passing on misinformation. Snopes is a great place to verify information that comes to all of us in these emails.
http://www.barackobama.com/factcheck/2007/11/12/obama_has_never_been_a_muslim_1.php
http://www.barackobama.com/factcheck/2007/11/12/obama_is_a_patriot.php
I sure hope all the good hearted folks on here won't flame me for encouraging us all to check things out before we post them or hit that FORWARD button.
Peace to ALL.
We are emailing each other directly
now and I sent a CD of a song to her that I wrote from Westminster! This is great. I wrote it for family, friends, etc. and never, never thought it would go the places it has gone. I guess for the week plus we connected on this board I never knew a gab board restricted to gabbing bach and forth. Who knew? Also, what was the harm of getting to know one another a little before we exchanged personal email? Thanks.
There is an autoimmune board - see directly above your post. nm
x
In our county, they summon people directly from
the registered voters pool. I'd always heard that from friends who worked at the county clerk's office, but didn't really give it much thought. I get summoned a couple of times a year & my husband never did, then when I talked him into registering to vote, now he gets summoned all the time too...
Mine is the prominent bone directly down from the little finger. nm
:
In addition,
I have found relief with limited use of a tanning bed. Obviously, this is contraversial and has its own drawbacks and possible it may dry skin more, but my problem stems from seborrhea and UV therapy helps. I go about once a week.
New addition
Meet Boo!
Dempsey finally has a sister. She is a bit of a scaredy cat but she will come around with time.
One addition here
I know where you are going with your post. I know people think you are crazy but you aren't.
Don't people know how to make anything from scratch anymore? Geez.
In addition...
In addition to the point that all those women are somebody's mom, sister, daughter...
If the BF is involved in anything involving underage people, keep in mind that you shouldn't do anything on his computers, and it would probably also be wise to keep your finances completely separate (separate banks even, not just separate accounts).
Why?
Because in the case of anything involving children, EVERY PHOTO OR VIDEO IS ALSO EVIDENCE LEFT BEHIND FROM A CRIME SCENE! Any money he spends on the habit could be traced back to you if you share accounts.
From your most recent post, it seems like the BF doesn't know that you know. That's an interesting place in life. I never had the courage, bravery, stability, or self-esteem to not completely turn into a blubbering pathetic mess every time I stumbled on recent evidence. Mine always knew when I found stuff because I just couldn't handle it quietly. I never found any evidence of child-related stuff, though. I always told myself I could have found the courage to set the trap silently if I did. Thankfully I never needed to.
Sheila has it right and in addition...sm
You can encourage her to look at her bills and see what she can cut back on. For instance if she pays her own rent then she can do things like be sure to cut off lights, have the A/C set at 78 instead of colder, consolidate trips in the car to save on gas to help free up money for other things.
We give the kids a bonus in our household. For each month the utilities bill come in under the budget amount they get to have 1/2 the savings for entertainment. It sure helps give them an incentive to cut off lights when not in rooms, not stay in the shower until every drop of hot water is drained, etc.
With the increasing cost of gas when we leave home we try to consolidate errands as much as possible. Now instead of going say to Target for odds and ends and then Publix for groceries we go to the Super Wal-Mart where we can get everything at one stop. These little things add up and I'm finding myself now going about 2 days further between fill-ups than I used to.
In addition to the swats or the ISS, I would take away sm
something at home, i.e., TV, cell phone, Ipod, a previous engagement to do something fun. Being late is rude, lazy, and says "hey, look at me, it's all about me" so nip it in the bud right now. Kids today need to be taught to be on time, be polite, and have table manners, etc. Mine do.
In addition to considering the maturity,
I would also consider whether or not there is someone next door (maybe the bus driver you mentioned) that would be willing to "keep an eye" on him and that he could go to in case of emergencies.
I was a latchkey kid at about the age of 11 or 12; however, my older brother was 14 or 15 at the time and my grandma lived across the street from us.
My oldest son is now in fifth grade, 11 years old, and I have only been allowing him some "home alone" time in the last year. I really wasn't comfortable with doing that until he was 10, but each child is different.
I would also caution you to write down some ground rules and maybe just start out by leaving him alone for 1/2 hour here and there to see how he does. If you're not comfortable with him being home alone, you won't get much work done during that last hour of the day anyway. Good luck!
In addition to the media, I would also
contact an attorney if the school does nothing. I've seen a few movies "based on fact" where the school is legally bound to protect your child during school hours. If the school does nothing and the police do nothing, I would contact an attorney immediately.
I am keeping the journal going and in addition...sm
I bought a ceramic cross yesterday with 1 Samuel 1:27 on it which says "For This Child I prayed". I wrote the baby's nickname that my husband & I called it, the EDC and "went to heaven" dates on the front of the cross and it's hanging in our living room next to our family photo.
Congratulations on your new family addition.
Take your dog to the door every 30 to 40 minutes or so and the dog will get the idea that the outside is the place to do its thing. Could MAYBE give a treat when the dog actually goes outside and does not have an accident in the house. But, try to be careful on the treats, they will get accustomed to that really quick. Good luck.
I am so glad i do not have to keep maiden in addition
to all these past names I have had, being on my 4th marriage now. Gosh, that would be 5 names in all, wouldn’t it?
I am personal trainer in addition to an MT
so I am at the gym working out almost every day, and when I am not at the gym, I am on my home treadmill. I like to keep in shape and always have. I find that working out always puts me in a good mood (the endorphin release). I was always active in sports as a kid and have always been very tone and fit. I am also only 25 (26 in September), so my metabolism is pretty fast anyway!
I'd say IN ADDITION to getting a generator as I mentioned above.
l
After reading your 2 posts below in addition to this one...
You need to get OUT! In time the kids will know what is going on either way, married or divorced. If you husband has been physically aggressive with you before, who is to say he's not going to have enough of your turning him down one day and come home aggressive again?! I'm worried and I don't even know you. Listen to stories on the news about the women who trusted their husbands implicitly and then one day something snapped in him - don't let that happen to you. Besides, do you want your kids thinking his behavior is a healthy one. Consciously or not, many children model their future marriage skills after their parents. I think you should seek individual counseling and advice from a lawyer. Commonly the first visit does not cost you anything and they will tell you what type of retainer fee they need so you can be working on that. Also, when (hopefully) everything starts to get in motion, get your kids in counseling too. Early is better. Don't wait for problems or issues. A lot of kids are very good at hiding their feelings from their parents. Finally, I must say, as controlling as your husband sounds the only reason he wants you to stay around is financial. Men talk about these things, my husband had told me. You will make out just fine. He'll be the one writing the check - oh, and you can request that it go through the court so you don't have to see/talk to him about the money every month. Good luck to you. Go with your gut. Be sure to let family know what's going on too so they can keep their eyes open and help if needed.
That other board (in addition to not being free) is also
nm
Here's an addition to your question about layout - sm
that was unbelievable. I was at a Walmart one day to buy jeans. In the unlikely event I find the 'perfect' pair, I usually buy 2 of the same size, 'cause who knows when you'll ever find a perfect pair again, right?
So I'm in the dressing room trying them on, find the perfect pair, and go out to grab another identical pair before heading to the register. Only......
While I was in the dressing room (maybe 10 minutes, tops?), they had completely reconfigured the entire jeans section, and the whole display that had the jeans I wanted was GONE! I spent another half-hour looking for them, and never did find them, even when I asked an employee, who was of course clueless.
So, I guess Walmart is kind of like the weather in the mountains. If you don't like what you see, wait 10 minutes and it'll change!
In addition to the black oil sunflower seeds,
cardinals also love safflower seeds. Extra bonus -- squirrels will not eat safflower seeds. Cardinals also require a platform type feeder as opposed to a perch feeder.
We have had very few cardinals this year, which is quite unusual. Two winters ago I counted 19 all at once. It was after a heavy snow and it was quite a sight.
Love them birds! 
Too many of these stories becoming familiar, in addition to inforcing the death penalty....sm
I have to ask myself why so much of society these days is behaving in this way, uncontrollable, ugly rage...is it the decay of family units, absentee fathers, is it the abundance of drugs, violence in media....I am old enough to remember a time when these atrocities seemed to be the RARE horror stories, why the abundance now? No God in their worlds?????
Addendum: In addition to have warp speed internet connection; just short of having my own server.
MOST IMPORTANT!!!!
x
It's not really as important to me as it is to you.
Why don't you take your misdirected anger and put it where it belongs instead of being mean and rude to people on the Internet who have done NOTHING to you!!! Now I remember why I stopped coming to MT Stars and that's because of rude people like YOU.
This is very important..
the cat should be an indoor cat ONLY!! It would never survive outside without any claws. I don't understand why people put their cats out anyway...they are just as happy as being indoors as long as there is stimulation and playtime. I let my cat out on my balcony (under supervision) to "blow the stink off him" but he prefers to be in the house looking out the window.
VERY IMPORTANT
It's very important that you teach your daughter that someone who treats her like this is not a true friend. I have taught my daughter to BE NICE TO EVERYBODY, but you DO NOT have to be everybody's best friend. I have told her what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior. Help her understand that it is disappointing, but the sooner she accepts that's the way this girl is, the happier she will be. Unfortunately my daughter had to learn the same lesson at that age and I have had to reiterate it to her this year in the 7th grade. It's OKAY to not be best friends with this girl, and that friends should not treat friends this way. It's all about boundaries.
Important
I think it is very important to try to get to the root of your son's problem. He may not have a real handle on what is bothering him (or what happens) either, but there should be someone qualified to help with that.
Another thought is to see if those nanny shows are on DVD. It seems they are very smart about handling a lot of the situations with children and families.
Well that is certainly more important
in the long run.
P.S. - very important
Another thing you don't say is how much you really know about this man. If he has bad credit, unpaid child support payments, a criminal record, etc. this could permanently scar your own situation.
If you don't truly know a great deal about this man, spend a few bucks and have a private investigation firm check him out.
I do not have anything more important
To think about than the one person on this board who posts every other blog, arguing back and forth with themselves, like you, pretending to be 100 people, Maybe you should think about that.
Some important questions
Are there people around who can look in on the grandparents and get back with you? If I were unable to get in touch with grandparents, aunts, siblings or the like and had always been able to, I would contact the police to get them to intervene. I would think they could check up just to ease your mind and make sure they are ok. Oh, by the way, you might text or leave message on cousins phones since you are unable to hear from them this is your plan-- It is surprising how putting this out there will get the attention you are wanting. I just recently got some wonderful results from a person not responding to my emails, realtor to be exact- told him what I planned on doing, no need for him to reply, 4th email and that afternoon a phone call and an email. Works wonders!
Why is the lifestyle more important?
He is a me type person. I have a grown daughter just like that. He is only thinking of himself and what he wants. This is the difference in my martial situation- if my husband wanted to move somewhere else I would go with him in a minute, no question. I love my home but I love him more. The statement about the other woman would probably make me feel a little uneasy because I feel if you are saying things like that, how do I know you are not acting on them? I have a cousin spent loads of time hunting, going to all kinds of meetings of things he was involved with, had 2 almost grown sons, left his wife of 30+ years, had met another woman and gave up a paid for 4 bedroom brick home to live with this woman in a trailer… It happens.
It's important to know these things
You'd know if you hadn't had a BM in 5 days or if you hadn't peed in an entire day. (I'm not suggesting people are writing these things down, I'm just sayin'...) Both might signal that something wasn't right. Periods that are not right in frequency definitely can signal things not right with the body. I think it's a great practice and will do so when my 3 start with their periods. I have PCOS, so I'm a little anal about it, but I so wished someone would have taken notice when I was a teen and showing many signs of it.
Freedom first and most important
My husband has only danced with me ONCE during our entire (more than two-decade) marriage and that was under extreme pressure from his buddies (we were out with a group of friends, mostly couples).
I lost my identity for a long time but after YEARS of marriage I am starting to get it back. Baby steps, but little by little...
I am for them. They are an important reminder
Although they are considered a religious symbol, it should not offend atheists to see them on the side of the road. This is America, land of many religions, and how someone wants to honor a loved one that has passed is their business in my opinion. They are free to be atheists and should allow others their freedom as well.
I think it is important to realize that...
the world does not revolve around us. If there is not a huge amount of fighting or abuse of some sort, why should she deprive her children of their father. Often, I think children say what their parents want to hear about the other parent. My 33-year-old brother still does. There are worse things than waking up and going to bed with a person whom you do not love. And - I bet that if she tried, she could still find something she does love about him. I really think that society has made divorce to acceptable. There is just no incentive to stick it out through the tough times that everyone has.
One important question...sm
One of the things you don't mention is what each of you is bringing into the relationship materially. You say "he knows what he wants out of life", and that's disturbingly different from saying "he has achieved (whatever) in life". After all, what he wants out of life might be a cushy situation...or a mother...or lots of other things that really aren't healthy.
If this man is 40 and isn't bringing a substantial material contribution to the relationship in relation to your own contribution, this is a VERY big red flag.
What's he been doing? What has he accomplished? How stable have his jobs been? At 40, a man has accumulated a sufficient record to tell you exactly who he is beyond his words and protestations of love. You must be willing to LOOK at these things very objectively.
Aside from that, I'm afraid that 70-versus-50 will not be such a good fit, and 80-versus-60 will be even worse.
I'm sorry I can't be more optimistic about this, and I really debated whether to post my reservations because I'm not interested in raining on your parade, but there are simply too many examples of such extreme age differences where the older partner, especially when that is the female, has been victimized by shiftless opportunists who talk the game and say all the things the lonely female wants to hear.
Vitamin D is very important
A lack of vitamin D is the cause of ricketts. It doesn't happen that often in the US any more because of all of the fortified foods we get, but if you don't go outside much at all, it can be a real concern. There was a story about a hugely obese man - like 900 pounds obese - who had horrible pain and it turned out to be a lack of vitamin D. THe only way your body can metabolize vitamin D is by exposure to sunlight.
Doctors always want to make sure that women who are older or at risk for osteoporosis take Calcium and Vitamin D. The Vitamin D helps the body metabolize the calcium.
You should probably take a calcium supplement as well, if you aren't already.
Hope your rib pain goes away!
IMPORTANT. READ THIS!!!!
Right now we are in the first stage just like what happened to Mexico. We are in the mitigating phase for pandemic with level 5.
This flu has the Avian (bird), swine (pig), and the human flu; all three combined. This flu can last 160 days and will spike around 87 days. This flu bug is lay around dormant for a total of 30 days. This flu can have 2 stages. The first part of the flu is just like a flu bug that normally people get, but then it can mutate and go into a secondary phase. The host will try to find your lungs and settle in your lungs and cause pneumonia. Once you have pneumonia with this flu, there are no antibiotics to cure you or fight off infection because this is a new strain of flu.
Yes, lots of people die each year of the flu, but they are usually older people with immune system down or children under the age of 2. The reason why not many people die is because we had flu shots or it is an old type of flu and our body is immune to it.
PANDEMIC MEANS: No antibiotics to cure this flu and no vaccines for this new strain of flu hitting the world. Means imminent for the flu to be wide spread.
Right now you are seeing the spike (second stage)of Mexico which is about 87 days later from when the flu started in Mexico which I believe was around February.
In America, you are right now seeing the beginning of the flu. Around 70-90 days, we will spike just like Mexico, but, it COULD be worse. Mexico was the first wave and we will be the second and could be worse than Mexico. The germ bug is getting smarter and it likes to pick on hosts that are approximately ages 10-40 and VERY HEALTHY INDIVIDUALS, not so much the elderly.
Basically the people who have the flu now are lucky, because they ended up getting the milder case and just watch when it spikes. Also the reports you are seeing is CDC is going back days to weeks, meaning, CDC is going back some 14 days and finding individuals who might have had a case of the flu and then do a test and then report and state confirmation of the swine flu or should be known as H1N1 flu. We do not have confirmed cases as of today, but days or weeks ago from the CDC. This germ/bug is multiplying and multiplying just like a wild fire out of control which can produce more new fires.
Basically, in the next few weeks, partically every state will have the flu. What makes me really nervous is that CDC and others felt this level 5 was going to be announced Friday and possibly Thursday, NOT TODAY!!! It must be pretty bad.
One important point..........
They know for a fact that the AIDS virus was spread for the most part to the heterosexual community by gay males who were married to females but were gay and engaging in homosexual behavior outside their marriage. Their wives contracted the disease, may have divorced, been in other relationships themselves, and not knowing they had the virus, passed it on.....
You're starting to get the point I suppose....
Two important things to keep in mind (sm)
First, he was the one who told you, not someone else. If he were trying to "get away with something" I seriously doubt he would even mention it to you.
Second, they were at a public place, and he said he told you "people were staring." You need to ask yourself if he would do something he wasn't supposed to when people were watching. Also, if people were staring it was probably because they were wondering where you were. None of their business.
I say trust DH on this one. Don't blow it out of proportion, and give him the benefit of the doubt. However, I would also keep an eye and an ear out for this woman. Sitting next to your husband one time at a game is one thing, but it shouldn't become a regular thing.
Best of luck to you! Hope this helps!
I know diet and exercise are important as
well as cutting out sugars, bread, etc. I'm doing that and have been for a while. Please keep your comments to yourself. I'm asking a simple question about a "certain named product"- is it that difficult to answer without stating your "opinions" or telling me what supplement you use? I don't remember asking for your recommendations?
Eyes are important. Why not make
an appointment? If the cause is just allergies and rubbing, maybe they will give you an Rx for allergy drops if eye itchiness is your main problem. Or you could try using an oral antihistamine and avoid rubbing your eyes and see if they improve. Get some Refresh Liquigel lubricant eye drops by Allergan.
Health care is important, but..
Not together I hope.. you could burn something important LOL
You have to confront him. Your health and well being are most important.
I believe people know they are gay from a young age. Some might be confused about it, but, by adulthood, they know they are gay. I cannot imagine a straight guy watching gay porn or, worse yet, seeking gay escorts. He's gay.
IMPORTANT ADDENDUM: Please read (sm)
The Xbox 360 console supports only the Xbox 360 Wireless Networking Adapter and Xbox Live Compatible wireless-to-Ethernet bridges, routers, and gateways bearing the Xbox Live Compatible logo.
If you can not get the Xbox live wireless adapter, You could buy a very long ethernet cord and just plug directly into the router without going wireless.......
You are such an important and beautiful person
It sounds like you have done a lot to try to keep this marriage together, but it seems obvious your husband is not interested in that. You need to take care of yourself. Forget about him. If he is not interested in having a relationship with you I would move on. I know it has to be heartbreaking when you love someone so much but they don't return the feelings. If it was me in your shoes I would start making preparation to move closer to family or friends and start a new life for myself. You sound so down on yourself and you need to realize you have done nothing to deserve this. Again, if it was me, I would take some classes that would help feel good about yourself like some cooking, dancing, art or whatever you like to do. I think your closest friends will be your best people to talk to. You said you just want to go home to your mom, dad and brother and be happy again and that is definitely what I would do. I think you know in your heart it will not work out and I am truly sorry you are going through this. I'd say pack up what is yours, and move on back home. Your family can be your greatest ally and strength. They will help you with whatever you are going through. Also remember, there are hundreds of men out there who would be happy to share a wonderful relationship with you. First though I would take care of yourself, learn about yourself, who you are as a person, what your needs and goals are in life and then go for it! You are a beautiful person and you deserve more happiness than what you are going through with him.
Whatever sale item is most important to you
start there...early. Sale ads from Wednesday night's or Thursday morning's newspapers should tell you the store hours and sale hours. Many end at 11am. My dd and I like to go about an hour after stores open, though it's still dark outside. The crowds that were waiting in line overnight for the big ticket items are gone by then, and most everyone else avoids the stores until the afternoon hours, thinking they will be less crowded. Wrong they are though. There are more employees on duty early rather than later, so things move more quickly in the morning hours. We've also found the earlier crowds to be friendlier. DD starts singing Christmas carols while standing in line and soon lots of others join in. She's a blast to shop with. Then we go to a late breakfast and go home before the unfriendly crowds show up. Hope your experience is an enjoyable one.
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