I would not force him to stay if he hates it - sm
Posted By: on 2008-07-08
In Reply to: In your opinion, is there a benefit to forcing children to - stay in Boy Scouts if they hate it? sm
that much. That said, I am a GS co-leader of a Brownie and Junior Troop. Both my daughters are in GS, 1 loves it, the other wants out. Since I would have to take her to the meetings anyway, I am making her stay in. The only part she does not like is the meetings, which is twice a month for us. She loves the activities we do which are not too much 4 booth sales a year (cookies and nuts), a campout a year in cabins at a GS camp, and usually 1 or 2 other fun activities with other troops, skating, baseball game, that sort of stuff. Despite my 1 daughter's protests I know she will still have a good time, especially this year as our Brownie troop went from 14 to 8, and our Junior troop from 14 to 4. I don't know how much longer mine will want to do it but I will stop when they really don't want to or don't have the time anymore due to other activities. We don't plan on having a Cadette troop (the next step after Junior)as our leader doesn't want that responsibility, so we have I think 2 more years at least. Once my oldest is "done" with it I will pull them both out, or is she wants to continue I will just find another troop for her that has a Cadette group. ---These boy scout leaders need a bit more compassion, and need to allow the boys to call home once a day if they want to. No you don't want some kid calling home every five minutes. We had a girl like that in our troop, a real pain in the butt. She was a bully, constanting hurting others or bullying them, and all the other girls could not stand her, but we had to deal with her and teach the girls to nice to her, etc. in hopes that this girl would get better. Never happened. I am happy to know she is not coming back next year. She made every event a drama about her, calling mom constantly on campouts, changing her mind about leaving every 5 minutes about having her mom pick her up early, crying, fussing, generally just being a pain if she did not get her way. (She has emotional problems at 11, on drugs for depression, anger mgmt--parents were finally forced to get her help after she tried to choke someone 2 x at school--private school, and they pay handsomely to keep her there by donating stuff all the time to the school, the girl will never get kicked out though she should have been expelled years ago for her violence)--- but that is me off on another tangent. ---But the men leaders have that caveman thinking, that the boys have to tough it out to become men, and all that garbage. They definitely need to clean out their campsite, rake it out, build a nice fire during the day....we never have unattended fires at night....even when I tent camped for my training. In theory the BS leaders should have their training, both BS and GS require training, though BS has a lot more stuff going on the GS, but the GS has lots more red tape and paperwork we have to submit before doing anything---took me an hour to fill out all my forms this year, for the 2 girls and myself as a leader. ---but I do believe scouting is good for kids, but if they really, really hate it, don't make them, it just makes everyone miserable there.
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My MIL hates men
Don't know why. She beat up her first husband on several occasions (she was drunk a lot), and she also picked up her 2nd husband and threw him through a wall, down some stairs and beat him up a couple times (she is a stocky woman). All while claiming the victim role. She really hates men (unless they were her high school sweethearts) then she is always showing us her pictures with her old boyfriends while pointing out how beautiful she was. She was a pretty girl then but now she looks 20 years older than she really is. It's those times that I am always tempted to say "beauty is on the inside", but know what she did to her two husbands I stay clear and keep my mouth shut. Sometimes I used to feel bad for her until I was alone one time while my DH went out to the store and she decided to tell me how much she does not like me and that I should leave my husband and go back home to "where I belong". Anyway...nobody can understand why she hates men so much, but her hatred for her first husband goes further - into her kids. She blames her kids for her not being successful. If she didn't have all those kids (7 of them), she would have "really gone places because I was smart and beautiful". I try and not be around when those kind of conversations come up.
A DIL who hates my guts - enough said!
....
I know. Here I am all excited, and what if Sasha hates her!
If Sasha says no, we'd be nuts to get her because Sasha needs somebody to play with.
Normal or not? Son saying he hates h is sister (sm)
He is 10, she is 3 years younger. She is usually nice to him and loves him. I could understand if he blurted out "I hate you" when they were arguing, but tonight I told him that she won't be home tomorrow afternoon and he and I could go see a movie or something together and he said "she won't be here - good - I hate her." And he said it so mean. I told him he is not allowed to talk about her like that, that she wouldn't talk that way about him and if she did, she would be in trouble. He said, "I don't know why, she's just so annoying and I hate her." I asked him what he thought "hate" meant and he said that it was wishing someone would just "poof, disappear." She tends to be more outgonig than him. She learned to waterski this weekend, while he refused to even try. So I don't know if he is just jealous or what, but it scares me that something so mean can come out of my own child's mouth.
Might I add that FOX news, who hates Moore..nm
When Sicko came out in Cannes France over a month ago, it was FOX NEWS (who really dislike Moore since Fahrenheit 911 movie) who FIRST commended Moore's SICKO film........FOX NEWS!!!!!!
No, but I swear my sister hates me sm
since I refused to loan her $3000.00 two years ago to get her and her family out of a "temporary" bind. She hasn't spoken to me or emailed me since. I call her and she doesn't call back. I email her and no reply. We spoke all the time before that. Guess she didn't like the fact that my son's college tuition bill was more important. For some odd reason, she thinks we are loaded since we haven't filed bankruptcy yet and all my other siblings did.
Yes! Can you see 3 of them? And they are expensive, too. DH HATES it! haha nm
.
That does not mean it was by force and
it also does not mean that is happening currently. There are many teenage girls married in this country. That is not something new. We should wait and see what the investigation uncovers, if anything.
My DH also works for post office, but hates Netflix (sm)
His job is to keep all those post office machines running, and he says those Netflix envelopes jam them up!
yes to both..but by choice, not by force.sm
some docs get caught up on their dictations while on holiday. I am alone and have nothing better to do anyway, so why not make some extra cash. but that's just me. good luck in your search.
I'm working, not by force sm
I always work Thanksgiving and Christmas (if there is work). I also work the 3rd shift which makes it easier for me to do. I love the holiday pay!
The point is -- you don't have the right to force everyone
Yes, many people have severe pet danger allergies.
We don't all worship the ground FiFi walks on! LOL
Some of us have a life!!!
they should force feed the
troll....If you or I, we would spend more than 3 days there.
Air Force question...
OK, my son has decided to join the AF...he's been through MEPS, all that, and is due to sign his contract today...however, last night we find out that the job he wants (security forces) gets deployed...not to war zones...all the time. They are on deployment an average of 180 days a year, so we have been told.
I'm asking y'all if anyone here has had any firsthand experience with this and if so, is this what my son can expect? I've googled it, of course, but come up with conflicting information. I need firsthand info, if it's out there...I'd appreciate so much anyone sharing anything they know about this!!! 
He didn't force it down her throat..
She obviously just wasn't smart enough to say no.
Maybe not physical force but they did not have a choice. Besides that, they are not sm
legally married in most cases so that would constitute statutory rape. How many teenage girls do you know who want to be married to stinky old men?
... force myself to be nice to people I
No, what comes next? Force feeding meds?
Example:
If I am depressed it is MY choice to take antidepressants or not. If I do not feel comfortable with them, no matter what the doctor says, I can stop it.
Antidepressants have a LOT of bad side effect and there are alternatives!
You can't force someone to learn so that they leave the system
io
Aqua-Teen Hunger Force's Ignot and Err.
I could never explain the cartoon...it's something you have to see to believe and have an incredibly warped sense of humor to enjoy.
Normally, this would be something I would try to stay out of, but (sm)
I would think if you called CPS and explained things just the way you did here, they might be able to do something to keep the aunt away, and parenting classes for the parents wouldn't hurt either. I agree with the other poster who said if parents (or you) act first, anything the aunt did at a later time would be considered retaliation. Handicapped parents many times can be the best parents, but it sounds like they do need some help with setting boundaries.
I think I would stay put if I were you. He knows where the
door is and can use it if he chooses. Your first concern has to be your children and you should not have to find a place to live if he is the one who has the problem with you. If there is no adultery involved here, don't rush into divorce. Divorce is painful and can get nasty. Sometimes just being away from each other can "calm the waters" and allow you to make a more objective decision. I speak from experience. My husband and I divorced very hastily when we were very young after less than 2 years of marriage and then remarried, had 2 children, divorced very hastily again and then remarried again. Had I just been a little less in a hurry I could have saved myself a hiney-load of money and a lot of heartache by just being away for a while and then making an objective decision. Instead, I rushed into divorce and paid dearly. 
Stay away from CC....
If you have been having problems meeting the minimum payment on any CC, by all means don't go opening another credit card. Your credit report will be an absolute mess. I know it's 0% interest for one year, but read the fine print - there is usually a fee of some type, plus, can you pay it off in one year before the interest starts up? You never know what will happen in life and you may not be able to make the payments, the rate goes up, and you are in deep doo-doo.
Sallie Mae is high interest, your 401K is better. With 401K you are paying yourself back with interest. It's a no-brainer. No one gets your money but you. Is it possible to borrow again from a 401K if you already have a loan out? Having the money deducted automatically from your paycheck and put back into your 401K is the safest and smartest bet...as long as you have a job.
If you ABSOLUTELY have to have this other loan for $7,000 then the 401K should be your only choice. Can you do without the $7,000 and get back on track before getting deeper into debt - or at least until you pay off the existing credit card?
Why would you want to stay...
with someone who is, as you say, mean? If you are not happy, LEAVE! When you stay you are condoning his behavior. Some women want to be martyrs, others want to live a great life. There are great men out there; wallowing in self-pity does not get you one though.
Well, obviously we don't want to stay
somewhere where there's still a lot of damage. That's why I'm asking for personal experiences, and hopefully recently. We don't want to book a beach house and when we get there find out it's in the middle of a big mess.
stay vs go
First, I am so sorry for your situation...that being said, the kids will definitely pick up on the negative vibes between you and your husband. As far as your question goes, I think only you and your husband can know the answer to that one. Just be very aware of your kids and behavior changes, emotional lability, etc. Trust me when I say, they are not dumb...they will pick up on what's going on, no matter how hard you try to hide it (yes, I'm speaking from experience...). Good luck!
You definitely need to stay on top of this...
The kids who you think are least likely to commit suicide are the ones that actually do...that is not meant to scare you by any means...most kids find it easier to write down their feelings than actually expressing them face to face so the fact that he wrote this means something is bothering him...I think you should both talk to your pastor..good luck...(((HUGS)))...
I think you should just stay out of it.
It is just humiliating for kids when their parents act up or cause a scene.
The name of the game is fun. Your going into the game wanting your son's team to beat the other team because of YOUR issues with another parent is very immature and selfish.
Trust me, we've watched parents like you've described yourself (and others, in fairness) acting out and it is so unsportsman-like and completely immature.
Embarrassing for everyone.
To Done: STAY !
No husband is perfect, we are all human. Your husband has a lot of good qualities. Think of your children! I think you are spoiled and unthankful. Maybe he is right and is better than you. He loves you, why don't you; I think you are just bored.
If I don't have anywhere to go, I stay
in my jammies. I usually get up and take the kids to school in jeans and my jammy shirt. Then come home and put the jammy pants back on. If I don't have anywhere to go, I don't get dressed until mid afternoon when I break for lunch. I usually put something in the oven and hop in the shower. Sometimes I just put clean jammies on, sometimes I get fully dressed. Either way, my contacts go in and my hair gets done. My husband likes me either way, as long as I'm clean. I find I wear my jammies more in the winter and am more likely to get dressed in the summer, probably because kids are always coming and going in the summer.
At any rate, I tend to be more productive when I'm dressed, so I should probably try to do that every morning, but I'm just not a morning person. Every year for Christmas, my mom gets me "work clothes" (jammies)!!!
Where we stay in NYC.
We stay at the Embassy Suites on North End Avenue right in the financial district. It is walking distance to to the Village, China Town, Mulberry Street, etc. It overlooks the Harbor and you can see the all the helicopters coming in and out. My husband always goes to Battery Park to watch the helicopters. It is not too inexpensive, but you do get free breakfast and there is a happy hour at 5:00 p.m. if you like to have a few drinks, which will really cost you in the city. There is also a fantastic deli 1 block away that we always hit for a late night snack. We go at least once per year, sometimes twice or 3 times. We love it.
You really have to stay on top of the cards
I do a lot of card flipping with balance transfers but also calling and trying to negotiate new deals. I just switched one with a balance transfer at 3.9 for the life of balance and then talked them down to a purchase rate of 8.9 (it had been up in the high teens). I also talked a card I've had a while into a 2.9 for the life of a balance transfer instead of the 12 month offer they were having because there was a delay in the electronic transfer to the other company causing me a bit of inconvenience. That transfer was actually for a loan I had at a pretty high interest rate, so some loans can be put on cards too which I never knew. I find websites that list ALL the latest offers for all or most card companies and I'm always checking. Sometimes I call my cards and tell them I am thinking about switching unless they can give me a similar/better rate or deal. Often they will so as not to lose the business. I have saved a ton of money doing this - it is sort of like consolidating on your own. I can post the site if anyone is interested, don't have it handy right now. Oh..I also have automatic electronic payment setup to pay a certain amount each month from my checking so the payment is NEVER late. You are so right about that, that's where they get you! I just thought maybe some of this info may help someone, I hope so. My credit is very good now but had been a mess in the past.
Remind me to stay
 away from that doctor!!!
Did he marry her so he could stay in the U.S.? nm
.
I go there frequently and would not stay in
the Flamingo. It is right downtown but a very old place, the smoke when you go into the casino is terrible, not as classy as I like. It might be cheap but then you get what you pay for. I love the Mirage, stayed at Treasure Island, very nice also, favorite though is the Bellagio, more expensive than most on the strip. Love the buffet at the Luxor. MGM might be alright and at the end of most of the strip but I would think ok as far as a place to stay.
To make it stay that way
If you want everything on your computer bigger: right mouse click on your desktop background. A little box should pop up. Click on 'properties'. Then click on the settings tab. There should be a little sliding scale with the screen resolution. Move it to less resolution (left). Then click 'apply'. Your screen may black out for a second, but when it comes back, everything should be bigger. Certainly saved my eyeballs!!
Also if you stay away you are letting him win(sm)
As that seems to be his goal -I would not let him keep me from seeing the rest of my family. However, I also would not want my children exposed to his mouth, so if you cannot stay in a hotel,I would go and visit without your children, which I do sometimes as well. I see my family about twice a year, usually once by myself and once with the kids, at which time we stay in a hotel.
Its wise to stay away
I had a C-section and had planned to stay at my mom's for a week or so to recuperate. As soon as I got there, I put the baby in the cradle in the living room and started to put some things away in the bedroom. I could hear my step-dad saying "get 'im, get 'im" to his dog....I went out there and he was actually encouraging his schnauzer to mess with the baby! I came real close to braining him with a can of tomatoes over it. I left and refused to bring the baby to their house as long as he was in it. My mom, too, chose the step-dad over her kids. Now he's dead and her relationship with her kids is rocky, and she regrets it.
Need help with a dog that will NOT stay off furniture (sm)
We have a black lab in the house - had him since he was a puppy. He was/is not allowed to be on the couch and other furniture but....he considers it a challenge. If I am in my office, he will get on the couch and jumps down as soon as he hears me walking into the family room. I don't know how to make him stay off. He is a very smart dog and we challenge him in other ways with training. One of my kids will be home for the holidays and has allergies. The dog hair on everything is getting to me real quick! He is 2 years old now. Forget the dog bed - he looks at it and laughs!! 
Can help you on this, we stay at the Bellagio
and hear that is higher up on the scale of rates.
Do NOT stay just because of the age of your kids.
Being unhappy does affect your kids, whether you are abused or not.
3 yrs and 3 months. Stay over every other
xx
I'd try to stay calm, but (sm)
One thing I told my now-husband years ago was that I had to have honesty enough to know if he needed something from me that I was not giving, that he was not to go looking elsewhere for something without asking for it at home.
In this day and age, with STDs being they are, there is no excuse for adultery. It's not just thoughtless and hurtful, it's irresponsible with someone's life.
As far as being calm, I'm just not sure temper or tears works in a situation like that. I think many men "turn you off" when you get in that situation and nothing gets heard or accomplished, and something needs to get resolved with you guys PDQ.
Stay together for the children - yes or no? (sm)
Husband and I have been on the verge of divorce for years, trying to stay for kids. But now we can't seem to stop arguing for more than a week at a time. He is including me in none of the decision making and acts as though we are already divorced. I am worried about the effects divorce would have on my children, emotionally, financially. But part of me is ready to just plunge into the unknown. I almost feel like I don't have a choice. Would appreciate opinions and viewpoints either way.
me either. I'll stay right where i am!
xx
Stay away from Effexor --- Run from it!!!
A little background history: I am married and had just had my third child 6 months before this. I was juggling 1 PT office job, 1 PT MT job at home, and 1 per diem job in a clinic 2-3 days a week. I felt overwhelmed dealing with my 3 jobs and my 3 kids, then ages 5, 2-1/2 and 6 months. I went to my doctor and told her about my stress and the mood swings especially during my period.
I was started on Effexor 5 years ago this month. At first, I was kind of afraid of it and didn't really notice any difference with it. After taking it a week or 2, I decided to stop. I just quit taking it cold turkey. About 24 hours after my last dose, the problems started. First the awful headache came and then the lightheadedness and vomiting. I immediately took one and lied down for the rest of the evening. I decided I would just stay on them until my next doctor's visit. Several months later, when I saw my doctor again, she asked how it was going and I said fine. I decided to stay on them, thinking I needed them.
After a couple of years of being on Effexor, I began to notice breakouts of acne on my face. I'm not talking a few pimples around my period; I mean serious almost bullous-like breakouts on my face continuously. Now I had never had acne in high school or after that until now. I also gained about 50 pounds, probably partly my fault, but a lot of blogs I read also noted this. But most concerning were the "brain tingles" I felt at odd times. At any rate, after 5 years of being on it, I was ready to stop. I began to realize that my problems couldn't be solved by a pill and that I needed to change myself and the way I dealt with stress (I'm not suggesting that's what you need to do).
Remembering the problem I had initially when I tried to stop the Effexor, I scheduled a visit with my doctor. She gave me a taper and I started it. At first, I was okay -- just taking it once a day every 2 days and then skipping a day. But when I was supposed to take it just every other day, I noticed the same problems - headaches, lightheadedness, nausea, vomiting. I called my doctor back and she suggested a slower taper again. We tried with no success. After much research on the internet, I asked my doctor to prescribe a single dose of Prozac to counteract the withdrawal effects. After a lot of discussion, she agreed to do so.
I took my last Effexor on December 18, 2007, and I will never, ever, ever take that medication again. I also will never take another medication without fully knowing the side effects as well as the withdrawal process of it. I strongly urge you to research any drug your doctor prescribes fully before beginning it. I wish I had. I only hope there are no long-term side effects of Effexor that have yet to be unveiled.
I can stay up as late as I want to - I go to bed between around 1:30 a.m.
I hated going to be early when I was little. Now 40 years later I'm rebelling.
Don't stay angry, instead get EVEN.
been there, done that. no need to be in a hurry, either. if you take months or even years to get even, you have just that much more time to come up with something truly memorable.
or, you can do something swift and simple, like blocking their emails on your pc as spam.
Just a Coke for me --- I stay away from the
I would tell her to stay if she had something good there
but apparently this "man" has put the move on 2 of her sisters. I have a wonderful marriage so definitely not against a man- I am against a woman putting up with a man like this who apparently does not respect his wife, her family and on and on.
Oh, stay with me Diana-
I'm so young and you're so old This, my darling I've been told I don't care just what they say 'Cause forever I will pray You and I will be as free As the birds up in the trees Oh, please, stay by me, Diana. Nah, never heard of any of them. I love, love, love Paul's songs. I know he tours up north and would love to see him in Vegas sometime. He has never come south as far as I know.
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