I strongly believe that time and place we die is predestined...
Posted By: () on 2009-06-14
In Reply to: This really is sad but if it is to be, then it will - Firm believer
I came twice into situations where I escaped death.
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I am in the same place but my time is worth as
x
A funeral is not the time or place for your friend to take a stance over something done 10 yrs ago.
I don't mean to sound harsh, but for your friend to even "think" about saying anything right now would be selfish and inconsiderate. He has had 10 years to deal with this issue. Why now??
I really tried to look at this issue from all angles and to be honest, just really don't "get it." I can't understand why anyone would feel the need to change a name they have had for at least 18 years. If my daughter changed her name, I would be absolutely devastated. Unless she was in the Witness Protection Program, I would continue to call her by the name she was given after 26 hours of labor and delivery. I'm not sure I could call her by another name even if I wanted to. It may not sound like much, but your friend is really asking a lot from people. Old habits DO die hard and this is so much more than just a habit.
If a friend of mine did this and it meant THAT much to her, I suppose I would try to make her happy. Without knowing all of the details, it's hard say for sure. One thing I do know is that if your friend is going to address this, he needs to wait for the appropriate opportunity. The timing he chooses could have a significant impact on the outcome.
Do you mind me asking why your friend did something this drastic?
I strongly disagree!.
I think everybody remembers the 'first time'.
It is said that no woman forgets her first lover and even if they might part, she will always have a special place in her heart for him. (Well, not everyone, it depends on him, too)
I believe strongly in gender rolls...
I know that this statement will be contraversial, but I think that the best way to keep a marriage healthy is to subscribe to traditional gender rolls. While I believe that marriages can last when other agreements are made, I think that straying from traditional gender rolls is a big cause of the increase in divorce. Yes, my husband does clean some and, obviously, I work, but for the most part, I take care of the house and the babies and he brings home the money. We are very happy this way. I am not saying that it cannot work another way, I think that it is a lot to ask of a husband to do both and a lot of women do.
For a young cat with no playmates, I would strongly recommend - (sm)
that you have your catsitter come daily. When I went on a trip and for cheapness reasons had my sitter come every other day, he was oh, so lonely and depressed. Having the radio on did help - that was her idea. But daily visits are better, then kitty has something to look forward to. Hopefully MIL will play with her too!
Another hint: My CA suddenly got very ill with kidney failure a number of years later, while I was also away on a trip. THANK GOODNESS my sitter came every day, or she would have found a dead kitty. She took him to an emergency vet that saved his life.
Now I always leave ALL necessary info. for the sitter: Vet's number & how to get there, as well as emergency vet. I also leave a blank check made out to EACH vet (regular & emerg.), because the sitter had to cough up a $500 deposit out of her own pocket the first time.
Other ideas: I leave a couple extra bowls of water around the house, especially in the summertime.
If kitty likes treats, sometimes it's fun to hide some around the house so that she has to "hunt" for them.
I unplug things she is capable of turning on - such as the paper shredder and both computer printers, since mine is so fond of turning them on.
For young cats especially, the toilet bowl lid should be down, to prevent accidental drowning.
Also, it's wise in any case to have kitty microchipped... provides a little peace of mind, should the unthinkable happen and she gets out and gets lost.
Providing a brand-new and very interesting toy just as you leave gives them something new to think about. Or else hiding an old favorite for a few days before you leave, and then presenting it again just before you leave.
I live in an apt., so I have a little sign in the door that says "In case of fire, please save me" (along with a photo of my cat.)
I really see and feel strongly about both points of view here. sm
I will say I am a Catholic, and a divorced one. I am not practicing at this point, but I am not an unbeliever...exactly. I consider myself a gnostic Catholic, and that is a story for another day.
The so-called Christian morals we have in this country are SELF-IMPOSED. They are with all religions. I consider myself a Christian, so I don't believe in sin because well, Christ died on the cross for the forgiveness of sin...even BEFORE we think about sinning. So, some of this I don't buy into.
If anyone thinks they have the slightest idea of what God wants them to do, they need therapy! WHY would any of us think we know the mind of the Divine??? I don't care how religious you are, YOU DO NOT KNOW THE MIND OF GOD.
I was in an extremely abusive marriage. He abused me, the kids, our minds, our bodies, our hearts, our souls. I was married in the Catholic church and I am still married in the church, having a divorce without an annulment. I made the commitment to keep only to this one man and that I have done. I live celibate for a number of reasons and my spoken commitment in the Catholic church is one of them.
Their respective marriages are over and not because of each other. They are free to be together if they choose to do so. Being arrogant enough to think he knows what God would want, yes he needs therapy! I think he is a bad bet for her because he will always come right back to what God would want, has no ability to exercise the Free Will God gave him, can't think for himself and would be pretty useless as a husband. This may, in fact, be what drove his wife to kick him out! Milquetoast!
I'm sorry. I know I keep posting replies but I feel strongly about this (sm)
my mother was molested by her stepfather, back in the late 40s/early 50s when no one did much about those kinds of things. He also molested her sister, who ran away and got married at age 13 to escape him. He then molested my sister (yes my mother took us to visit them!) and probably me, although I don't have any memory of it. Also most likely my young female cousins who lived there. My point is...a person who would do this type of thing will not just stop. He has probably done it to others too that you don't know about. Look how long it took your sisters to tell you. I am so sorry. But you have to do something. And if you end up in court during a divorce, your sisters have to speak up for you. You are all going to have to stand together. I can tell you really love him and you don't want to believe this. It looks like you are going to have to believe it. If he did this to children, there is something wrong with him. Something inside him is broken, not working right, and you can't fix it. You are going to have to gather all your courage and leave. I am currently in the process of seperating also, but with a different set of circumstances not involving anything like you are dealing with. If you want to email me and just have someone to vent to, please feel do. Again, I am so sorry. Please go get a free consultation or a paid consultation with an attorney. If you go to church, go speak to someone at your church. You have to do something, I'm sorry.
Strongly recommend crating when not home or able to supervise
We adopted a 1 yo Rottweiler who literally ate the couch after he totally destroyed the living room, tore curtains from the windows, spread trash from the kitchen throughout, shredded newspapers, had the stuffing out of the pillows . . . all in one day! I was at my wit's end and called the vet, who recommended a crate for when we weren't home or if he needed a "timeout." It worked great. We used it for about 1-1/2 years. He was having separation anxiety, so he was only in there when we both were gone. She may have to do it at night too, depending on when the dog is chewing things. Our dog started sleeping in there at other times with the door open. He loved it. It's not cruel if used correctly and not as a punishment. It saves a lot of stress for both the dog and the owner.
Strongly recommend crating when not home or able to supervise
We adopted a 1 yo Rottweiler who literally ate the couch after he totally destroyed the living room, tore curtains from the windows, spread trash from the kitchen throughout, shredded newspapers, had the stuffing out of the pillows . . . all in one day! I was at my wit's end and called the vet, who recommended a crate for when we weren't home or if he needed a "timeout." It worked great. We used it for about 1-1/2 years. He was having separation anxiety, so he was only in there when we both were gone. She may have to do it at night too, depending on when the dog is chewing things. Our dog started sleeping in there at other times with the door open. He loved it. It's not cruel if used correctly and not as a punishment. It saves a lot of stress for both the dog and the owner.
Sorry, don't believe in that place either!
Hmmm, that was a very christian-like post - NOT! lol
she's in a much better place now
and with her son. I wonder who raises the baby.
there's a place for everyone
:)
That's why this is no place for it
I can tell you right now a lot of people would not like that. I asked someone how they would like it if it was the satanic bible and they have yet to answer. Although they were mighty quick to come back accusing me of being a non-believer when they have no idea what my background is. People don't want the Koran or Tanakh or the Jehovan bible (if they have one), the Wiccan Book of Days, or better yet, how about the Satanic bible. No, they wouldn't like that. To them its the bible or nothing else. People need to keep their religious beliefs to themselves.
I think I might have already gotten something to take the place
My husband the other day told me we needed some new towels, others worn. I thought well just let him get those as I seem to always be the one to buy things needed in the home. Yesterday UPS delivered a brand new 32 inch television to me, an early birthday gift for March from hubby. This morning I went out and bought him lots of new towels (and wash cloths also).
In the first place...sm
Sounds like he went to rehab for all the wrong reasons. Namely, for you, not for himself. The only way an alcoholic/addict has any chance for long-term recovery is to want sobriety more than he or she wants anything in the world. You work the program not for your family, not for your friends, not for your employer, but for yourself. Otherwise, he'll go right back out. Trust me on this.
Meanwhile, get yourself to Al-Anon STAT! The Al-Anon program shows you how to detach and take care of yourself and have your own life. It shows you how to make healthy decisions for yourself and not to enable to alcoholic/addict.
Best of luck to YOU.
No! That sounds too desperate. TIME. Just give it TIME. If it is real, then sm
something will definitely evolve. If you like him, flirt back! Don't act desperate because if he DOES like you, then the suspense will just make him want to get to know you more. Trust me on this.
I worked in the medical records department of a hospital when I was single and dated a few co-workers in my early 30s. It was fun. Nothing serious came about any of the relationships.
This sounds like fun - the beginning of maybe something to come....Keep us informed.
What happened in the first place??
x
I'd have a BIG problem with it. Not her place. (nm)
x
Yes I would - it's not the teacher's place to do this....sm
shouldn't they be spending time teaching anyway instead of being worried about what kids do and don't believe in outside of the classroom?
Teachers are being allowed to do whatever they want this day in time. My high schooler listens to her biology teacher rant and rave each day about the "evils" of eating meat and she's sick of hearing it every day and is anxious for the end of the semester next week to get rid of this obsessive teacher.
Maybe look for a bed and breakfast place in that...
area. Chamber of Commerce might be able to help you.
Congratulations to her and to you!!! You should place the right arm
far over the left shoulder and give yourself a pat on the back. What a wonderful support you have been in helping her achieve her goals and you should be very proud of yourself, too. I know she is so appreciative for all of you that made her dream come true!
It's OUR place to tell our government that
Don't forget, the government is supposed to be owned by us, US citizens. They have gotten so giddy with power, they have forgotten that. Why else do they write their own paychecks, given themselves raises, and can continue to draw HUGE incomes after they leave office for the rest of their lives, including HUGE incomes for their wives long after they are dead, free healthcare, all the perks. These are public officials. Once they are out of office, they're on their own. We have let them take control of OUR government. It's up to us to take it back. You have a phone, e-mail, petitions.......you get the message across to them. Don't wait for others to do it for you.
I will take more than I bought in the first place
if they don’t cough up the $700 plus Tuesday morning and according to what (if that is the way it goes) it brings in on the court house steps, then I get % and the courts take % but not as much as mine. I can hardly wait until Show-Down at the OK Corral Tuesday morning. I just get ticked off thinking about their nerve.
NO WAY. It is not your place to tell them, let their parents tell them when they
think the time is right!!!!!
"No other place...."
NO OTHER PLACE
By Sondra Stallman ( poetry from II Cor. 5:8)
I turn and walk down a corridor.
Even though it is a strange and different place, I am not afraid to walk it.
There is a deep quiet here, like a hush and a soft sound of singing.
Everything has gone white. I am in a Most Awesome Presence.
There is no time nor space.
The Presence is all encompassing.
There is no “air” as I know it, yet I care not.
I am still. I feel no need at all.
No hunger. No thirst. I’m not tired.
The greatest change within me is the total lack of desire to utter a single word.
My thoughts seem to have stopped. It is like I am floating.
I have always been very conscious of my “self”….my “body”….my “thoughts”,
my perception of things around me! In this place, I am utterly emptied of “self.”
My awareness is keen, however, of the Presence that is everywhere.
It is a Peace so deep it sustains all things that come near.
I feel as if I’ve been shot into the very center of a hot and burning star.
I can feel the energy that is creating and re creating every milli second.
There is a distant sound of song, as if miles away.
Voices that sound like velvet feels
are floating past me.I linger before the songs.
I reach out.
I can touch them with my finger.
I can TOUCH the SONGS!
Suddenly,it seems that the SONGS are INSIDE ME!
The light is bright and deep and all wrapped up in the songs.
I see no one.
I feel only Ecstasy.I know of no other place.
I know nothing but the Love
And The Light.
I Will never Leave.
II Cor. 5:8…”to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord.”
Looking for best place to raise a kid
I like where I live...but after a week from H E double toothpicks last week, I really feel that a bit of distance between myself and any family members would be better. Long story short, you think your family will be there to help when you need it, but instead all you get is beaten down and end up feeling bad and having to deal with your crises by yourself anyway (it's the ONLY reason I moved back to this area a couple of years ago).
Currently, I live in the deep south and my city has an excellent !!! school system, but I know there are other good school systems out there. So, here are some of what I would like in addition to a good school system.
Near water and mountains (could be lake or ocean, or state park), easy access to public transportation (in case my car breaks down), a good YMCA or city recreation center.
I've been looking at a borough just north of Philly, a couple of small cities in Virginia, a city north of Denver, some areas in North Carolina. I would like to avoid the west coast unless it's somewhere in Washington State or Oregon. I've considered the Reno area, but I've never been there and I don't know what the schools are like.
Any ideas? Thanks!
Another place to check...
My basement has a sump pump and water collection area behind a basement wall. The drainage pipe goes out to a pond down the street. It took a while to figure out that was how tree-frogs were getting into my house. Sorry about your snake problem--it's one of my few phobias (though I still will not kill them). BTW, I also saw one go through a crack in the sidewalk. Amazing critters aren't they?
There is no place in my house
where these would fit in. I am no where into the shabby chic thing, have had these in a cabinet and going thru all my stuff for the last day before the sale next weekend found these and hey, since I am not using, am gonna try to sell selling. I have some things of my hubby (who is a pack rat) and just hope he does not find what I have gotten of his. Ekk...I have everything but the kitchen sink, carpets, vintage jewelry, floor lamps, table and chairs, etc. I can hardly wait.
What a beautiful place for all of you!!! nm
XX
He never was yours to let go in the first place. Make the
.
If OP wants to be messy, get own place. But then
x
Got cables all over the place, what to do?
As most of you know, these cable from the computer, fax, printer, etc. can be a mess. What systems do you use to help control these, any information would be helpful.
No - no place for a bible
I know this is going to infuriate a lot of people, but in my opinion the bible does not belong in the classroom. If someone brings one in but keeps it their desk drawer or backpack to read on their own time that is one thing, but to keep it out in plain site? There is a place for that - it is called church. In this day and age there is such a multitude of people of different religions. How would anyone like it if I was an instructor of your child and I kept the Satanic bible or books of other religion out in plain site - don't think you would like it.
Anyone know of a good place
to go on the web when lonely and/or bored (of course I come here, but we all need a variety). I sometimes surf single sites and read profiles (both sexes just for fun), but I am wondering if you know of something fun to do. ?
There is a special place for them
The worst crimes committed are abuse to children and to animals. In the bible it does state that hurting or maiming an innocent animal is one of the worst sins, the first being abuse to children. These are innocent creatures who are here to help us and give us comfort and love. They never ask for anything, are always there for us and never complain. It sickens me to my stomach to hear of abuse to animals. When I was younger I had a dalmatian pup. He was outside one day, fenced in, and got out through a small place in the fence. Someone in our neighborhood saw him, hit him with their car, and left him to die. I was heartbroken and it took me a long time to get over it. I would not like to be the person that will have to stand before God in judgment when it comes it comes to abusing these blessed animals. Only a coward and a bully would commit such an act.
Anyone know of a place I can send...sm
My father took our wedding pictures as he is good behind a camera and we wanted to save some money. But now (a year later..lol) I want to have some of them cropped and black and white and softened, etc. Anyone know of a reasonably priced place I can send a CD of pictures to and have them edit them and print them out for me so I can finally create my wedding album? Thanks in advance.
Your birth place
Have you moved or been back to the place (town) you were born? Has is changed drastically or is it pretty much the same?
I was just looking a pictures online of mine and it hasn't changed all that much.
Wow, the place sure has changed!
My hubby and I went there on our honeymoon in 1985. It was very quiet, and we went all over the place on scooters, taxis, and even rented a jeep and drove up the peninsula some 100 miles or so to see the ruins at Chichen Itza. At that time, the airport looked more like a bus station!
I would have had a great time, but it was January, and I had the flu... REAL influenza; the sort of illness where you feel like you're going to die and you just don't care. I started feeling a little ill even before we left home. By our first night there, I felt horrible and was sick for the entire week. All these years later we laugh about our honeymoon and how I walked around Cancun like a zombie.
For what it is worth, the last place your son...
wants to work is a bank if he is having credit problems. I worked at a bank when my husband left his job to start a new business. We started to struggle financially, and over the course of a couple months, my performance reviews suffered for nonsense reasons, my kids were not allowed to visit me at work which was a common practice in this small town, and I was repeatedly asked to switch doctor and dental appointments at the last minute even when made at my routinely scheduled lunch break. Basically nitpicky stuff making me want to quit, so I obliged.
I worked in the trust department never touching any money and never bounced a check the entire time I worked there, yet I was profiled and not in a good way. I feel your son is better off out of an atmosphere like that no matter now frustrated he is. It took me a long time to get past how unfair their treatment of me was.
On the up side for me, I was able to gloat when a couple years later they hired someone who embezzeled $25,000 and with absolutely no imagination. Just transferred that money from the town's charitable accounts - like the Lions Club - to her own using their system. No one ever even checked...LOL.
She had no place to tell other children that...
maybe other teachers, if you were switching classes, but not students...she could have just said please stop picking on him or something to that effect without going into detail...I would be extremely upset as well...what if he had HIV or something major like that, would she then go and blab that to the students as well...Hang in there
Doing lots of work around our place
stained two-story house, three buildings and two decks in the last two weeks. Just now getting around to the actual yard work/fall clean up chores today. There's always something to be done. My two-year old grandson and I spent the day picking the last of the garden, pruning back plants and me pulling him around on the wagon behind the mower... what fun he had. We are on 10 acres in So. Indiana, mostly wooded. DH just got a lawn sweeper to hopefully help out with the leaves that are starting to fall. The maples are really pretty right now. Expecting our first REALLY COLD spell on Thursday, but it has been just beautiful the last two days, 75 degrees and sunny. Hard to come back in and transcribe on days like that, especially when you know what is coming in a few months. Next project involves moving lots of rocks to re-do a man-made pond/stream, needs a new liner.. I feel my back aching already, but it has to be done. The ornamental pepper plant sounds interesting, I may look into that one too to see if it will grow where I live, sounds neat.
Cats in the work place
My cat is walking all over me today. He keeps parading across my keyboard tray, trying to sit on my lap. I think he's trying to tell me it's time to quit for the week. Maybe he knows it's Friday! At least he makes a much better co-worker than some of the ones I've had in the past!
It was never long in the first place. It was all fake! nm
,
First place to start is with berries.
My husband is in produce, and he says we should always buy organic berries because they tend to absorb pesticides more than say, apples, where the pesticides can be washed off pretty well. And he said it was true of any soft fruit, so I'm thinking maybe peaches, with that fuzzy skin. He also reports that an unofficial taste test he did on organic carrots was interesting. He made carrot juice from regular carrots and then from the organic carrots. He said the organic juice was much better, and everybody agreed. What we'd be smart to do is grow a lot of our own stuff, but I don't have any flat land in the sun, personally. I do grow herbs in pots, though. Wow are those good.
Why should you reward kids for doing what they should in the first place?
Like have some sense, not acting out in public, minding their parents and/or other elders in charge. I believe it you give allowance or do something for the children, it should not be a reward type situation. No wonder the kids are so rotten now days.
Saw Jubilee at Harrahs but that is another old place
like Sands was, Golden Nugget. I would stay at Caesars or Rio (except off the beaten track) but I want to stay in really nice place when I go, therefore the
Bellagio. Their buffet is great, little pricey but really good. Wish I were there now diving into the unending shrimp!
Yes, it will change. Hubby will have to take second place
and may not like it. Your needs will become second, or third. And, kids are a pain in the butt. They always want something, food, water, shelter, clothes, toys, dogs, cats, cars. Mine are 30 and 32 and still asking for stuff. Wouldn't trade them for anything though. Two wonderful women and it makes me cry sometimes to think that I had a part in this.
That was not me that posted but the same slime place
Can you believe this. I do not see how they stay in business. I will post any and everywhere I can to do discredit to them. I appreciate the information you have sent.
Final place, unless we win the lottery! (nm)
x
I have been known to jog/walk in place during a TV show.
I'm cheap. The kids stay out of exercise equipment that way too.
Jump ropes rock too.
Mine were also from unknown place
Well actually guy had the 2 of my magnificant furkids (now they are since getting a year or so on them) at the front of a store and my better half brought up for me. I think it is wonderful you got from rescue. Anytime I buy my kids their food I always spend time talking with the ones up for adoption. Good for you- I would do that with my next 1.
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