I see lots of posts from marrieds with separate accounts.
Posted By: How interesting on 2009-03-19
In Reply to: Agreed to let hubby have all the refund on the income tax and drat! - Shaking my head at myself!
Are my husband and I the last of the money-poolers? We have no separate accounts, and we don't keep track of who paid in more or less to anything. He makes more than I do, but it all goes into the family pot. I do have it easy at tax time, though. Hubby is a CPA. I haven't prepared a tax return since 1983. Haven't balanced the checkbook, either. I just peak over his shoulder. He's self-employed, which is no cake-walk. We pay estimated taxes quarterly and we NEVER get a refund. Even when DH was an employee, we never got refunds. It's a CPA thing. He has a long speech about not wanting to give money to the government interest-free. I don't care. He handles it, and that makes me happy.
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Same here. We have separate accounts and
he has his bills and I have mine. I do know what he makes though and our accounts are linked to the same access so I can at least see what he spends and vice versa.
Yes, and we have separate bank accounts ;)
x
I think once disgust happens, lots of therapy is needed to feel love again. Lots
s
Banking accounts
Husband and I have been married for few years now and we definitely do not share our accts. We are on each others accts (as is my older daughter in case of our demise at the same time) but we pay separate bills (he pays house, vehicles), I pay for the smaller and then we split insurance and tax costs on home, vehicles and the like. There is NEVER a problem like this. I spend as I wish, he spends as he wishes and no question in my mind about his acct and he says nothing about mine. We decided this wsy before marriage and it works out great for us.
Eye witness accounts.
fdv
Seperate accounts for about 6 months now - and (sm)
previously seperate accounts. We were on the same account for a couple of years but it caused too many arguments.
How can he check bank accounts
I have my own accounts, that is right, mine, not his. He is not allowed to see my accounts. I have more than him and I do what I please with MY money. I made, received,and had before our marriage so literally it is mine.
Got question about banking accounts
I have my main account in the state where I live, direct deposit from my company and also have another account at the same bank where I get another check each month. My husband has a banking acct in another state (I am also signed onto that acct). I can transfer funds back and forth between my accounts at my bank but I was wondering if there would be any way to transfer a large amount to the out of state account. I know I could go into my bank close by and have the money wire transferred but gosh I would love to be able to do it over the internet, would save me time. Thanks.
at my kids' schools they give out envelopes when their accounts get low...
If they don't give me the envelope, then it's their fault. However, they have never gone without a hot meal at school - they just can't get any extras if their account is in the hole - which is an incentive for them to remember to give me the envelope.
It does bother me that I have two kids and two accounts. If one is in the hole, the other most likely isn't. I don't know why they can't offset each other. My checks are made out to the same thing no matter which school.
Religious posts and political posts go to appropriate boards. NM
Goldbird
That's why there are separate bedrooms - sm
quite a lifesaver in my book, even with that though I can hear him through the wall sometimes. I don't think he has sleep apnea, always associate that with being overweight (he is not at 5 feet 11 inches, 163 pounds); so I presume deviated septum. Of course he won't get it checked out. Unless it was a condition of work he just will not go to a doctor, hopefully I will not become a widow because of his stubborness and fear.
I don't see why you would have to open a separate--sm
account just to deposit that check. Once the bank cashes the check, you get the money. If there are not sufficient funds, that will go against HIM, not YOU. He will have to pay the extra fees, etc. to have the check clear. You get your money, either way. They cannot take it away from you if there is not enough money in HIS account.
Yes, you need 2 separate gifts - sm
I have not been to one of these in so long I do not remember. I generally went with something more personal with a bridal shower gift but we are talking about best friends, and then something for the 2 of them with a wedding gift. You can always give money for both though. Surprised though they are doing a shower, they should have everything they both need by this time in their life. Maybe some nice kitchen towels or knives or something of that nature if you do not want to go personal; for the wedding gift maybe a gift certificate to a local restuarant (something useful you know they will use). If you do not attend though, you do not have to send a gift though a card would be the nice thing to do.
They are 2 separate boards.
You'll find the Christianity board listed right about in the middle of the list of boards to the left. See Gab Board, then Conservatives, then Liberals, then Christianity.
I separate mine from his - see why
My husband is completely financially irresponsible and has no idea how to budget.
After spending two years trying to sort out his last horrible mess, his is his and mine is mine now and will be forever more.
Could be a reason why they separate theirs too.
take dog home with you; put cat in separate room for now.
nm
Going on 10 years, separate monies and
we have absolutely no problem with things. We half up big money items such as house taxes, vehicle insurance, the big bills but then he pays for the home, his truck, my BMW he bought me. I pay the smaller bills such as utilies because I have the smaller amount made. Works great for us. No problems ever.
can you separate the flavor from salt?
no, no more than you can separate the Christianity from the Christian. why should he have to HIDE his Bible in a drawer -- because the mere sight of it offends you non-believers? now THAT is silly. and calling the word of God propaganda is very offensive. Ah, but no so much to me as to HIM. and you will one day be before that 'big guy in the sky' and wishing you hadn't been so foolish.
Lots and lots of SKATING ! - sm
Mostly inline street skating, up & down hills, too. Some roller skating and roller-disco. I was doing ice-skating, but can't afford it anymore, plus I prefer to skate outdoors. It works all muscles, is low-impact, fairly quick to learn compared to other sports, like skiing, is a cheap sport, and excellent for keeping balance & reflexes sharp. Most of the people I skate with look & act 10-20 years younger than their chronological ages.
I MAKE the time to skate. I eat my lunch at my desk, but take a break in the late afternoon before it gets dark, to exercise. This can also include a walk or jog around the neighborhood, bike ride into town to go to the market (cheaper than driving), a fast inline skate around town, or dance practice on a local tennis court. Then I work into the evening for as long as it takes to finish up.
I filed separate from my spouse at the time--sm
against an old (over 10 years) student loan that I had. That was the only thing I filed against and it was way before my spouse and I had even married. Even though I filed in my name only, it affected his credit too, just because we were married. It continued to affect his credit even after we divorced 10 years later. Better think twice. It is not always a good idea to file bankruptcy as a way out of debt. Cut up those cards and start paying cash for things you want/need. The interest on most of those cards will keep you in debt forever. Been there! but not any more! good luck to you!
Has anyone filed bankruptcy separate from their spouse?
My husband and I have all bills and checking accounts separate except for the cars and we split the household bills. I have a ton of credit card debt and with MT pay being less all the time, was thinking this may be the only way out. I know the spouse doesn't have to file if their name isn't on the account, but is this very hard to do? Thanks for any info.
Some married people have separate accts just like
my husband and I. I don’t know what he has, what he makes each week- the only time we know really is when we do our taxes. He and I have our own banking accts but we are signed on just in case the need arises. It might work for her- does for me.
Separate bathrooms would definitely be great, or 1 huge one. Nix to the double
s
Child support is a separate issue from visitation. nm
x
I'd be totally ticked! Time for a compromise or separate
s
Feed in separate rooms, leave in with food for 1/2hr.
x
Keeping that part of my life separate sounds best -
I have been asked on dates but just have not been interested. I feel stuck just wishing we could all be a normal family again (the 4 of us). I even think ahead to when I'm a grandma down the road and still can't picture me with a new man! I don't know, maybe I'm just destined to remain alone unless I met the guy who was a perfect fit with my kids.
Thank you! From a Mom who had 2 daughters, serving 3 separate tours in Iraq - twice over Christmas.
.
why do you make your lasagne one day, separate it into meal size portions, freeze it, and eat it for
;
By trial and error. Lots and LOTS of error!!! -nm
.
The same with lots of ice....
Cranberry juice and vodka over lots of ice is always my drink of choice...CHEERS!!!
Me, too. I need lots of help.
I've got 1 room that turned into a storage room and every week I tell myself I have to get in there and straighten it out. I open the door, look around and close the door, and find something else to do.
I don't have any closets in my house and it drives me nuts. No place to hang coats, etc. when coming in from outside. They get slung over the chair that nobody sits in by the door.
We have 2 sheds and a 1 car 'tent' garage. Hubby keeps half his stuff in the tent garage and shed, I keep some of my stuff in the shed and mom's stuff is in the other shed. The first shed was built when we were moving from the old house, needed some place to go with it until we got in the new place, but it's still there!!!! I can't get to it because of hubby's snow blower and other quipment. I probably have some antiques in there by now. 
Mom died 7 years ago and I still haven't looked to see what's in her shed. I just don't have time.
I love to be organized, but when I organized my home the last time, I couldn't find anything!!!
This is nothing new. Lots cannot get
an apartment because of bad credit, same for jobs as has been discussed before on this board. If you cannot handle credit, people think you cannot handle a job. You might have to go back a few years to see who the bozo person is because just did not happen lately.
I have lots more to worry about as well - sm
I have a 6-y/o daughter that is only 1 year out from her chemo for kidney cancer and has been having some worrying symptoms lately, I have bills, I have lots of home strife to deal with , I have a DH who acts younger than my kids half of the time and cannot deal with any major problems and has undiagnosed depression and possibly bi-polar. I carry a heavy load here so you are not the only one in this world with problems. OH, I am in the USA too, so what does that have to do with anything? The coat just angered me beyond belief, maybe it is the straw that broke my back, my way of venting, who knows, but it something I can at least try to take some action on and maybe get it back. I cannot control my daughter's cancer recovery, all I can do is watch and wait and see if we make it to 5 years recovery without any recurrence, for the bills I am trying to work harder and make more money, for my DH I just deal with him the best I can and do pretty well but not all the time. So I have trival things and big things to worry about and deal with, along with millions of others. Sorry if my kid's coat loss/theft was such a mundane topic to post about but I am/was T'eed off about it and needed to vent and get opinions if I could on this. Yours is duly noted.
Lots of recipes at
foodtv.com Everything you ever wanted.
lots of days like that!
if I can I make a quick run to the coffee shop for a latte or take a 5 minute walk. its amazing what a lift a cappuccino or a latte will bring to my day.
Lots of questions
1. How old is the first house? The one with the sewing room and the carpet coming up?
2. How many sq ft is the second house - the newer one?
3. Have the rest of the houses in your neighborhood appreciated 66% in the last five years? (from $75,000 to $125,000)
Your husband has a good idea about putting the money in savings for six months to make sure you can afford to pay a mortgage that is twice what you are paying now. And after six months, you will have $1800 more to put down on the house.
This is strictly personal experience - but last summer we moved from a 25-year-old house to a brand new one. We lived in the 25yo house for 12 years, and the money we spent remodeling and updating (+ original price) it would have bought us a brand new house of the same size. So I would say go for the newer house if it comes to a choice. Older houses can be a LOT of work.
OTOH, you say your husband likes woodworking. If you're willing to live in a house that is in a perpetual state of remodeling...go for it!
Transcribed lots of them, never had one sm
They usually use lidocaine, but it still sounds pretty painful. However, if your mom's doctor thinks she needs one, then I would strongly encourage her to have it done. She could take Tylenol or ibuprofen before the procedure, and if she has Xanax or Valium, she could take one (or her doctor could prescribe one for her). There are several diagnostic imaging tests that they encourage patients to take pain relievers and/or tranquilizers ahead of time. It can really help.
I got LOTs of it, in different places! Only the
s
Don't be, there are lots of others who have it far worse- sm
than those of us here with husbands that basically are just spoiled brats who want it all their own way and don't want to have to do anything other than go to work (and most don't even want to do that) come home, eat, and put up their feet and watch TV. Mom is supposed to do it all, cook, clean, deal with the kids on every level, be ready to go when hubby wants sex and work herself, all with a big smile on her face. At least that is what my husband expects, though he does do the cooking though lately he has really cut back and I have had to pick up the slack or no one eats. He cooks for himself and I do the kids and I. I do everything else even cut the grass sometimes as he is "too tired". He has been whining about retiring for years now, he is only 48 but thinks he should be able to quit and I pay all the bills, don't think so as I make only about 20% of what he does. He says when the house is paid off he is quiting. I have told him no that is not an option until the kids are out of college (another 16 years), he is not too happy about that. Once he hits 55 I know it will really become a battle (or when his parents die as he is expecting at least 1M from them), but I will probably quit MT then and go out and get a job especially if he is homw all day then. My only consolation if I do stick it out is I will be a rich widow and he will probably develop cirrhosis in the next few years as he has been drinking 8-12 light beers a day for about 25 years at least, and he does not eat much as well; and hates doctors so by the time he gets any serious illness it will be too late most likely. A friend of mine in the healthcare field is convinced it will happen, just a question of when. Who knows, don't really much care. I keep my kids happy and they do love their daddy and he loves them to pieces too, but he is just a bit too unrealistic in his expectations of them, me and life in general. If push comes to shove I will probably demand he leave, he hates the house and has said on more than one occasion if he goes I can have the house (how generous of him), though I'd demand it be paid off first, so he'd have to raid the 401K for $50K but he would not owe me a penny; and on the side of stupidity I'd probably get a equity line and pay off all the cc debt we have just to shut him up and have less stress about that. That payment is a lot less than a mortgage and it would be worth it in my mind to do. We'd both be paying off debt and he could not whine that I stuck him with that too. Child support will make him whine enough as it is. He'd walk away with a truck, trailer, boat, big screen TV, his collectables/antiques (a lot of stuff), my mom's china (I don't like it and she wanted him to have it when she died and he loves it), a few tables, half the dishes and a 5 acre lot about 12 miles away on which he could build a house. Yes, I have thought this out quite a bit. Anyone in a bad situation, don't bury your head in the sand, think about your options and have a game plan if necessary. Good luck to us all!
LOTS of ideas
Probably way more than you need - but better too much than too little, right? (link below)
Lots of thought...sm
For a true answer - I would want to know how long my marriage will last.
Least likely to know - Would have to agree with other poster - would not want to know if anything terrible is going to happen to my kids.
It has lots of caffeine.
I think less than coffee but I can pull an all nighter with it.
Been to lots of places
My favorite all-time place for me has to be Salzburg Austria (birthplace of Mozart), if you want sunny beaches the best time my hsbnd & I ever had was Ibiza (one of the Balearic Islands located in the Mediterranean Sea). We had two weeks of peace and quiet in a little bungalow. Spent every day lying on the beach, drinking sangrias & munching on paella and fresh seafood. Hiked all over the place. Had to take a bus from the airport to the hotel which was a very interesting ride as I felt like I was in a Romancing the Stone movie (we rode with animals on the bus). Sounds horrid but it was actually fun. My other "beach" vacation spot is Greece. Was there for a week. Lots and lots and lots to do there. Beaches, sightseeing, shopping. Mind you these were the mid 1980s when Reagan was president (and our country was a little well more liked than now), so not sure about safety in other countries. Hands down though I say Ibiza has to be the best if you want a relaxing beach vacation.
Get her lots of bottled H2O. nm
x
There are lots of things
Chocolate, greens, and by the way, for fiber sprinkle flaxseed over food- no taste, mix in, you never know its there and I second the recommendation about prunes- cooked, dry, very good source.
I'm sure there are lots of stories
about angels, too. I have never "seen" angels, but I have often seen them at work. I thank the Lord for providing protection through them. Whenever I have a "near-miss" I thank the Lord.
My husband told me once when he was trying to change lanes, the steering wheel pulled itself right back so he couldn't. There was a car in his blind spot!
I remember once one of my kids running down the sidewalk and fell. From where I stood it looked like he cracked his head on the step in front of him. I cringed, but when I got to him he was fine. I just know an angel put his hand between the step and his precious head.
My mom was driving one day and didn't see that the intersection was icy. She tried to stop but started sliding. She slid into the path of an oncoming car. She closed her eyes and braced for impact but...nothing. She opened her eyes and the car was past her. She said there was no way he could have missed her.
These are angel stories.
Demons are fallen angels. They chose to worship Satan. They exist to torment and cause people anguish. Angels exist to praise God and they also provide divine intervention and protection for people.
Lots of flu in California
Flu vaccine only covered 40% of flu bugs so I hear.
Patience, Lots and Lots of Patience
First off, she is TOO CUTE! Oh how I miss those days. I have a 2.5 year old Basset boy. He is my third Basset. He was the easiest to potty train, I highly recommend a doggie door. My two prior Bassets weren't trained with a doggie door and I had accidents galore! Once I trained them on a doggie door, no more accidents (they were 4 and 5, so you can teach an old dog a new trick). Crate training is good too, it just takes patience. Basset Hounds are stubborn, but don't give in! I have loved these guys for a long time, they have the best personality.
I have a feeling there are lots of us out here - sm
I have to say I think I may have it better than most. I've been working home almost twenty years and now both kids, 17 and 19, are on the brink of leaving, probably next year. My husband started his own business working at home four years ago, and we're literally (almost) joined at the hip. We share a 10 x 10 office. Yet, we almost never talk. When we do it's business or kid related. Right now I'm making more money than he is, and his business hasn't grown as fast as he had hoped, and now with the economy . .
We started bickering about everything and about once a month have a big blow-up. I went to see a marriage counselor starting a year ago - he absolutely, positively will not go! So I'm going, mostly to find a way to survive another year or two until the kids are gone. I believe it will go one way or the other after that. I hope we stay together. We've both been divorced before and I wouldn't wish that on anybody. And I know the man I married is still in there somewhere. I'm going to do all I can to find him again so we can share the good stuff that we've worked so hard for - not to mention grandchildren when the time comes!
Good luck to you. I've got no advice for you, but you are definitely NOT alone!
I have lots of cats
You've got a number of issues. The biting and scratching is all part and parcel of being a 4-5 month old kitten. Get lots of toys - some of mine like small catnip toys, others like the small fur mice, and anything that rattles is usually good fun. I also have a small stuffed bear that my mom gave to one of my cats when he was a kitten - she rubbed catnip all over it - and he's over a year old now and he still snuggles with that bear and suckles on it. You might try something like that to give her some comfort.
As to the inappropriate urination, that could be a number of things. You need to take her back to the vet and make sure there are no urinary tract, bladder, kidney or thyroid issues. Many times that can make a cat go someplace other than the litter box. Make sure that the box is someplace she can get to really easily. You might also make sure that it's in a quiet corner. Sometimes cats don't like it if they feel like they're in a main traffic pattern. Clean the box every day, if you don't already. I sometimes get lax on mine and that's when my cats go someplace they shouldn't.
You might also try changing the litter. I use a scoopable and I tried to change to something that was biodegradeable and it was a disaster. The cats hated it and I had huge messes to clean up. There is one you can get at PetSmart called Dr. Elsey's Cat Attract Litter. They have a Kitten Attract formula. I've used it a little bit and the cats LOVE it. The first night I put it in some of the boxes, one of the cats jumped in and started digging like he was digging for gold. Then he just sat there in the box and wouldn't let any of the other cats in it. Fortunately I have a lot of other boxes. It's a little more expensive than the regular Tidy Cat scoopable litter that I use and I have a lot of boxes, so I can't use it all the time, but that would be worth a try.
Febreze works really well for getting out odors. One of the cats occasionally would urinate on my bed and it gets out all the smell. She did it to my new 6 month old Tempur-Pedic mattress too. I could have killed her. She hadn't done it in so long I thought I was safe getting a new mattress. Get a really heavy duty mattress cover, too - that will help in case she does it again so there's no seep through to the mattress.
You might also try Bitter Apple spray. You can get it at PetSmart as well. That should work to keep her away from places you don't want her to go. A former co-worker told me that she took cut lemons and rubbed the juice on plants and her kitten hated it. Cats don't like citrus smell at all.
Good luck!
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