I probably could have spent my time, money, everything
Posted By: Sara on 2007-06-14
In Reply to: but do you honestly regret... - sm
on me because I gave them so much and now it came down to money. One is a me type person and the other, if all they care about is the $$$ and would talk nasty to me, I can wipe my hands of anyone and I mean that, who does not respect me after all I did for them. Most of the posts you read here are mothers who have younger children and most are ok when babies, toddlers but the real life comes as they get up and supposedly have some sense. I did my job and thought I did a good job. Now time for me, me, me.
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Money spent and nothing to show for it
I paid a little over $600.00 for a dinette suite the first of April. They had to order and I called time and time again and finally told the store in August I wanted my money back. No reply. I took out a small claims against the company and the guy did not even show (although he got the complaint because he called me at home and said "I had fallen thru the crack." Yeh- right ! Anyway, by this time had bought another set and asked for just the return. No response to the file and now have gotten a judgement just for his not showing up. I am given a list of several things to collect my money, i.e. file Fi. Fa. which places lien against losing party and any property they own, 2) file garnishment against his paycheck, 3) file garnishment on his bank acct, 4) levy against real and person property (this I would have to contact lawyer for) and lastly turn judgement over to attorney or collection agency for collection. Please, anyone have any ideas on what steps I should take? I would like to not have to spend a lot of money if possible. Thanks
Save your money, other ways better spent
NM
My DH spent his check and we have no money for food this week. :(
the jerk
Some time spent with them would be
a gift only you could give.
I have a MIL who was jealous of any time I spent - sm
with my family. It caused a lot of hurt feelings on her side, and just made me angry for the most part. You don't sound anything like my MIL though but it sounds like you did not push the issue and fight for the right to see your grandchildren. In my situation, I married 1 of 2 sons. The other has never married or had any children. We have the only grandchildren for my MIL. She was manic that we have kids though she was vastly disappointed when we had girls and has remarked on this several times in the past. It is true we trusted my mom over her in terms of childcare, etc. though my mom rarely watched the kids as she lived 4 hours away. I did visit my mom at least 4-6 x a year, but I would drop in and visit my MIL and my FIL almost every time as I literally drove right by their house on the way up to my parents. My DH rarely calls his parents, I usually call his mom once a week and chat for a while. She used to never call but lately has taken to calling every 2 weeks or so. We also used to see his parents at least once a month for at least 5 years (now it is every 6-8 weeks), day visits, while my parents only saw the kids 4-6 x a year, though I would stay anywhere from 2-5 nights when I visited. This where the jealously came into play. I was/am very close to my parents and my brothers, much like your DIL I suspect. But I was exceptionally close to my mom, when she died almost 3 years ago my world fell apart. But my MIL was always jealous of my relationship with my mom, it drove her nuts I think. My DH tried to explain to her how close were were but she just could not understand and it caused her (and me) many problems. I would catch such grief from his family when I told them I was going to see my parents/friends, it was as if they wished I did not have a family. Holidays were horrible though we did do an alternating schedule though she would argue with me about that. Things a lot different now as she now gets to be the only grandma, which I am sure she loves. My stepmother is actually better with the kids though and has a great time with them, though I will never be close to her either. My in-laws get just about all the holidays now since my mom is gone and my stepmom wants to be with her kids not her husbands, so I don't get so see my family much anymore, maybe 2 x a year. Much more complicated these days, though we still don't let them (my in-laws) have the kids as they lack in common sense bigtime when it comes to what is safe and smart for my kids. I am not saying that is the case with you as I don't know your particulars of course. But it sounds like you just gave up. I would not try buying your son's love as it sounds like you did try. I know my in-laws tried though we were up front with them with one money gift they gave us that enabled us to pay off our truck in 1 year instead of 4, that it would not buy them weekends with the kids, etc. We told them that if there were strings we did not want the money. Money does not buy love as the Beatles said, very true. I would write back your granddaughter and say you would like to have a new beginning with her and the past is over and done with , and if she ever does want to know the real story, tell her. As for your son, have you even called him and invited him to your new home, it does not sound like it. Sounds like you expect a lot and are upset because they don't do the same for you as they do for the daughter's parents. The daughter controls the kids for the most part (as do most women) so it is to be expected that her family gets their "favor" more. You need to step up and be assertive. My in-laws do do most of the visitings here (we have actually never invited them here, they just call us and say that they are coming down on such and such a day, kind of aggravating), we rarely go up there as my DH just hates going there and really does not like his parents due to a bad upbringing. They really did a number on him. Does your son have any anamosity towards you? Did something bad happen in the past? You are long overdue for a long talk with him though. But I work hard to keep the lines open with them as much as I don't like doing it, I do it. My kids love them and I would never deprive them of that. I hope you take the first step and write to your granddaughter again, and call you son. You have absolutely nothing to lose at this point. Good luck.
Perhaps if mother Spears spent more time
parenting and less time pimping her kids all over Hollywood, this might not have happened.
Do you mean the actual hours of school. or also time spent
ol
Getting there early and staying late, time spent on phoning
il
Money says to me "don't really have time"
I wouldn't give money or gift certificate. That is not the purpose of why you think she's special. Your son needs to be part of the gift for sure whether it be a picture he draws or something recorded is a great idea. Money isn't everything.
can't talk now, time is money. nm
x
You mean like bond money for 1st-time homeowners?
nm
she works part-time so has money. nm
nm
How much money rasied for Katrina, how much money for the diasters due to the tidal waves and what?
Every single one of them have had some smoke around it with the money not getting to where it was supposed to go. I did not contribute, I hardly watched, was not caught up again as I have seen things like this before. They should give a all you can give benefit for Darfur where people are being massacared each and every day. Genocide going on there each and every day. I have not seen any benefits to help them out yet.
Thank you all so much. I spent about 6
hours last night researching this man and his family via Google and MySpace. I am horrified at what I found - its a troubled family for sure, but they look great on the outside - no what I mean? The house is perfect - the guy is OCD about working in the lawn, etc. Always the appropriate holiday decoration - yet underneath the exterior they are monsters. I found the teenage daughter's MySpace and read thru postings all over, on other friends' boards, etc., and this kid has threatened to do physical harm to many kids - she alludes to bombings, and her screen name has her name followed by Kills. She has lots of posts about bomb threats at her school and sounds bragging about it. Her town name she chose has comments on bombing. Wonder where the kids are getting it from? This is way sicker than I ever imagined. I am mounting my evidence, documenting all this stuff, and just praying that nothing happens to me or my family. I would love to move - just isn't a possibility right now. I am going to research the nursing tonight, but sure got side tracked on the MySpace stuff. The mother/wife even has her own sick site. Its unreal. And its unreal how easy it is to find people on that place. Oh well. Will keep you all posted.
I spent over $64.00 on
green queen sized olives yesterday, eat them like candy.
that is really sad - spent my honeymoon on
Padre Island - guess the beaches went the way of my marriage - down the tubes!
I was out before 8:30 and spent about an hour
shopping- I do not like to shop at all and mostly this morning bought things for me, like some flannel PJs and some sweaters at the outlet store. The crowd not bad at all- only 1 ahead of me in the checkout. I shop over the net quite a bit but had received flyer and things I wanted I got.
Last month I spent $321 for 3 of us.
It's just DH, 18 year-old son, and I. We live in the Philadelphia area. We generally eat far less meat than most American families, but we aren't vegetarian. My son commutes to a nearby university and works there, as well. He provides his own lunches, and probably only eats breakfast at home half of the time.
Now, if you want to factor in what we pay for the meal plan for our son who lives away at college, well then... that's a whole other story! KA-CHING!
how I spent my Monday morning...sm
Just wanted to say how much I missed this community while I was away...take a look at the picture I've linked...that's my neighborhood during our mandatory evacuation from the Marek Fire in California... Didn't know if I should post this here or on the mental health or prayer request boards LOL! Grateful to have my home...and my home office...next time you dread Monday morning...keep this as a reminder to renew your perspective! javascript:editor_insertHTML('text','');
We paid cash, spent about
$1000 total for grandkids and gifts for each other. We are debt free except our house. There is nothing like being able to sleep well at night and not be afraid to answer the phone should it ring. We have lived this way for many years, have learned to save money, pay cash for what we want. This has been to our benefit as we haven't had our CC companies drop our limits or increase our percentage rates at all; in fact, our limits keep rising even though we only use them once or twice a year. The thought of having to pay for something many months and years later is baffling to me.
Just spent an entire week in FL with brother sm
and his whole family - wife - 3 kids. To make a long story short, my sister in law does not like me. I'm about 7 years younger than she is. She is very jealous of my close relationship with my bro. Always. This trip she made it very clear how much she does not like me at all. I cried a lot this trip. My feelings have been so badly hurt. I've never done anything to her personally - she just hates me. My brother was very standoffish this trip and I know why. He has a very jealous wife. They would just get up and leave and not tell us where they were going or invite us. They NEVER used to do things like that. The whole time, if ever I had a suggestion for dinner or entertainment she would shoot it down with, "I don't want to do that!" I'm talking everything I came up with. What's even sadder is that they have 2 girls - my nieces - 13 and 15 - who used to love and adore me - their aunt - and this trip they were so ugly to me. I haven't seen them in over a year. We stayed in a 2 BR condo on the beach. Pretty small unit. They got the master BR. While walking to my room one evening the 3 of them (sister in law and 2 girls) were just berating me in gossip - talking about what I wore to the beach, the way I styled my hair, just stup*d things. Just gossiping so bad about me. I wanted to cry.
After I heard that about mid-way through the trip, I completely shut down emotionally. I only spoke when spoken to, didn't suggest anything at all to do, and was cordial, but not overly friendly like I usually am. Today when we left, she walked right by me in the hall and didn't say a word. Got into the car and they drove off. I had already said by to the kids and my bro. I cried when hugging my bro. He had his sunglasses on - he probably wanted to cry to. We lost our dad growing up and our mom pretty much abandoned us. We've stuck together until he moved out of state and started his family. I did too. He gets along GREAT with my husband and my kids.
What compels women to act like this? I don't understand it. Why would you want to live in your own prison of hate and bring everyone around you down? I can't stop crying! My brother lives about 2,000 miles away. I want to be close to him and his wife and kids. She won't allow it.
I know I have to just accept this is life and the way it will be. I am having a pity party. Can I say this eloquently without you taking offense? I am hating women right now. No matter how kind and nice I am, I always get slapped in the face. Always. I am a very kind and nice person. My mom always said I had wishbone but no backbone. I guess I just expect others to be kind, too, and when they aren't, I get hurt and I don't understand it. 
spent NYE playing Rock Band for PS2
a lot of fun though discovered I'm never going to be a drummer (or a singer) :) So I guess I won't quit my day job.
But her money is her money to spend as she pleases -
I don't understand how you can think it is wrong for her to spend whatever she wants to on whatever she buys. It is their personal money they spend. It is not like they are saying give me those shoes and add it to the taxpayer's bill.
And in all actuality, they are saying spend, spend, spend to get the economy going.
I am sorry, I am jealous that some people still have plenty of money to spend and I don't, but I don't expect those people to quit spending just because I had to.
wrong...he spent 4 years in korean schools
Spent 2 hours with my kids playing that today - fun! nm
x
If father thought child support was not being spent
x
No! That sounds too desperate. TIME. Just give it TIME. If it is real, then sm
something will definitely evolve. If you like him, flirt back! Don't act desperate because if he DOES like you, then the suspense will just make him want to get to know you more. Trust me on this.
I worked in the medical records department of a hospital when I was single and dated a few co-workers in my early 30s. It was fun. Nothing serious came about any of the relationships.
This sounds like fun - the beginning of maybe something to come....Keep us informed.
Totally agree, get these from time to time since teens...sm
It's a neuro condition, it does not mean there is anything at all wrong with you, it is actually related to narcolepsy, hypnagogic (sp? I just got up!) hallucinations, etc. And I HATE when I get these, it is always freaky, my siblings get this too, at times. I can "go away" for years and years before you get another episodes, so don't worry! I heard that when you are under a lot of stress or are very busy with things that this happens more??? Take care!!
It's time to stop when you or the kid(s) feel it is time, and no sooner. sm
My grandmother (who passed away at the young age of 107 back in the mid 1990s) was STILL celebrating every little holiday for all of her many kids and grandkids, and she would STILL give me a chocolate bunny every Easter, as she had since I was a toddler and even though I was 40ish at the time (and I still delighted in biting its head off in front of her, as I had also done since I was a toddler, which always met with mock disapproval from her).
Don't let anyone dampen your joy in celebrating your traditions.
The very 1st time he talked about killing you, was the time
The guy sounds like a psycho.
Rachael Ray has a segment from time to time
on using the bottom of the bottle receipes (i.e. bar-be-q sauce, peanut butter, maple syrup) and I have used many of her ideas and been amazed at how far you can stretch a dollar that way. Go to her website, it will give you many ideas.
Oh Amy, surely there was a man who "kept" you from time to time..
or you were at least married and had access to money!
It was a great time - I just hate the time we are in now
I liked your post. Thanks for replying It's nice to know other people were raised like me. We seem to appreciate the things we have. Oh I should've also said we didn't have A/C growing up. My parents idea of A/C was having my sister and I wave a piece of cardboard in front of them. HA HA HA.
I just couldn't stand the 90s and 2000s are even worse. I hate all the politics going on today, the world events, the bleak future. The degenerates running around, listening to kids talk back to their parents, girls gone wild, etc, etc. I'm grateful my grandparents and mom are not alive anymore to have to go through this with us.
I love watching old movies and the music of the 40s/50s. If I was alive back then I would've been doing the jitterbug and all those other fun dances. Life seemed simpler and cleaner (even though I've got a mouth like a sailer - guess I got that from my Army days).
I wouldn't mind the turn of the century either. I love the clothing and the simple life. Those are the times when the husband took care of the wife. If I could be transported back to the 1800s I surely would in a second.
You are right on the money here...
What great advice!!! I too did a lot of what you have listed in your post. It worked!!! When rules/expectations are in black and white, it's pretty hard to argue about it...
My 2 teens do their own laundry, clean the kitchen after supper, clean their bathroom, and now that they both work, buy the majority of their "things."
The key, I believe, is responsibility. Kids thrive with responsibility. They may moan and groan about it, but in reality, they thrive with rules and responsibility. Good luck!!! 
She is right on the money about that - sm
As I said in my post above. The discipline at our former (private) school was a joke. Luckily the majority of the kids at this school are good kids, but there are a few bad apples that would never be allowed to get away with what is tolerated at this school. The nutcase (or strangler) in my daughter's former class at the private school would have been expelled by now from a public school. Amazing what they will put up with for $6K a year and an alumni mother. Oh, and of course they have no type of a counselor or psychiatrist at the private school, no nurse even. They had a real cow when Jenny was in chemo and dealing with that. But that is another story.
Money.
Money or a gift certificate to whatever craft store they shop at when they get supplies for the kids. You can also donate money to the teachers "account" at school and it's tax deductible.
Where to put my money
I am selling my house and moving overseas. I will have between 250,000 and 275,000 after agent fees and loan pay off. I want to take about 50,000 and put in a money market account attached to my checking and savings accounts for easy access for things as I need them and for unforeseen expenses.
I don't know how best to use the other approximately $200,000. I will not have a job. My only income right now will be about $1150 a month from my rental property. I would like to invest my other $200,000 and live on the interest combined with my rental income. What is the best return I am looking at?
Of course I know I need to talk to my accountant and maybe hire a financial adviser but I'd like to hear some thoughts and get some direction so I can research it a bit myself.
5% for a money market is okay but is there a better way to structure this? In a couple of years I may want to use this $200,000 to purchase a home or business so it can't be away for good but 3-5 years is okay.
I keep getting told about going offshore because I won't have to pay taxes on the interest and with internet banking it is easy to transfer funds and make payments.
Of course you can tell I am a novice but I would like to start researching my best options. Any advice?
Money - Should I be mad or not?
Suppose you had a friend who was very nice all the time, to everyone, can't stand to hear anyone say an unkind word about anyone. Suppose this friend had come crying to you several times over a period of a couple of months with financial difficulties, and rather than loan them the money (which would prolong the difficulty in my opinion), you just gave it to them to help them get caught up. It was a necessity and children involved, etc.. So you helped them....anyway...
What if after that, it became a regular monthly, and sometimes semi-monthly event, where there was some major issue of why this person needs money, you figured they must really be having a hard time, felt sorry for the children, and helped a couple more times.
It is my feeling that when you give someone something, it is theirs, so you shouldn't even ask what they did with it. But suppose now you find out that they have purchased something fairly expensive ($400) that is a completely unnecessary luxury item (game), that they had to have purchased during the timeframe you were helping them, and mentioned some other things they have been doing recently - things that you yourself can't even afford to do!! Would you feel you had a right to be upset or would you just say to yourself that they have a right to have a life and once they had money, to spend it how they want? This happened to me recently, and while I have decided not to give them any more money, I am not sure if I should be angry or not?
Boy, that's a lot of money. I think about that old man in WV? who won
xx
Well, let me see, about money
I have been given money beyond my wildest dreams, from money I got after being outsourced 6 years from a previous employer, over 100,000 (where did it come from?, got retirement when I left there to money given to me by family member and then after this person's death, sold property left to me by them, sold a property I had before this one- the main thing though and I have said this time and time again- I try my best to help others out, choose either animals or people, whatever touches my heart. This Christmas picked some people out from Craigs List and did things for them. I do not do to get because my heart is just like that but things are always coming to me. My mother told me as a child I was like this, giving and I really believe it just comes back- Karma.
Money...
First of all, I can't understand why you would give him money...secondly, he probably is getting it from another woman. Guess you should just deal with it, it's really not any of your business where the money's coming from...are you engaged or otherwise committed to one another?
Boy, do I need the money
I might not receive it as I made just under $3000.00. The rest of my income was around $11000.00 from SSD. I had two major surgeries last year, and being an IC, have no benefits.
Now, if people in my income level don't need the refund more than the upper limit that was set, I don't know who does! Why in the world they would need it is ridiculous. I can definitely use it for bills, or better yet....FOOD!!
The money came from
my father- I was his only next of kin- no siblings living on my side or father's side, his wife not living. My son and his family had already received close to $100,000 from my father earlier.
you had money for that
the possibility of being on welfare? seems to me welfare wouldn't even have been a possibility if you had money for her college tuition plus. probably could have dropped a job or two. ?
See when it comes to having money around
I usually don’t have, don’t keep as much as $5.00 in the house but when I take her home and pay her, usually stop at the bank to use ATM so no money could be taken from the house. I think if you needed items such as the ones I listed (hubs said also has been missing laundry powders and things like cleaning solutions- he notices these things much more than I do (1 time had told me he had missing herbs he had bought- did not have to worry about me using as I do not cook). I hate to think about losing the help but then again cannot stand the fact of her stealing- by the way, the panties so new might have still had tags on them??
Where is all the money going
money
Has anybody ever heard of a Transcriptionist winning the lotto? thought not...lol, and if you did, I bet she didn't keep on working! 
He kept his $10 and only used her money for gas.
x
We can get you MONEY
The injury lawyers always say that phrase and I hate it!
It's my money and I want it NOW!
x
Of course they are...where's the money in
finding a cure for ANY ailment or disease? Wouldn't you think with all of the fantastic doctors and scientists this country has, the numerous telethons, fund raisers, charitable contributions, endowments, etc, that one cure for one disease would be found? Healthcare is the one industry that will probably never face a downturn, let alone financial crisis. Baby boomers = ailments and disease, ailments and disease = money; any wonder drug dries all that money up. I sometimes type people who are on 10, 20, 30 medications...what a racket.
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