I just think this younger generation just needs to be taught! sm
Posted By: Kim on 2007-09-28
In Reply to: Is this really a thank you? - please say thank you
I am a woman in my 30s. Got married almost 10 years ago. I lived up north for a long time and married a man from the "true" south. Okay. Here I go - and I may get flamed for this, but here I go...When I lived in NY, I NEVER saw a thank-you note or even saw anyone in my family write one. Never. So, I was never "taught" that you write thank-you notes due to my upbringing.
I think it is a cultural thing. Maybe it's even a socioeconmic thing. Yes, we were very poor growing up in NY. Both my parents made around 26,000 combined with 3 children.
Fast-forward. I move down here, meet this amazing guy with a large family - most have money - lots of it - we have a huge wedding - I receive more gifts than I could even count - met people at my wedding I've never seen before in my life - the southern generosity has been overwhelming, and still is. We go on our long honeymoon and when I get home, my MIL calls and says to me, "Mrs. so and so (from the wedding shower), still hasn't received your thank-you note. Maybe you just forgot to send hers out. In any case, just thought I'd let you know! EMBARASSING! So, I pulled out my thank-you cards that came with my wedding invites and began writing thank you notes. That is where the LOVE of writing thank-you notes and just-writing-to-say-hello notes began. I LOVE doing it now. Love it. My family up north and around the country are amazed.
Here again, I was TAUGHT by my new mother-in-law, so to speak, and she did it in a very tactful manner.
Writing notes is just an amazing ministry and I love to do it. I get them printed off and personalized now with either my initial or my full name. You can get them on ebay, they will print 20 of them for you with corresponding envelopes for around 10 bucks.
Anyways, this was my experience.
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I'm not the younger generation and I don't sew either
I'm 46 and with the exception of a button here or there, I don't sew either. I also don't iron. My mother did all of those things, it just never trickled over to me. Now, my daughter can sew a few things and her best friend has her own sewing machine and sews quite well.
the younger generation will be the heros
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yBUKRAE2O9c
Maybe you will be wise elder, but you won't be the hero, the kids will be.
i think it MUST be a generation thing
if my husband used body butter from B&BW, i would have to ask him what the *** he was doing. i stick by my story - it sounds weird to me.
my husband has dry skin and uses Lubriderm lotion which is not frilly, just gets the job done.
in the shower he uses a body wash and a bar soap. but he doesnt spend time in there, just washes and gets out. he would not think of taking a bubble bath.
I think nearly a half generation did that too *lol*
Don't forget the next generation
will be at it sooner than you'd think, LOL.
lately? these stories have been around before this generation.
nm
I probably would; I know too many people in this generation
that had the virus and now have infertility issues and can't have kids. May be a gift in disguise.
meant *my* generation......
x
unbridled generation--sm
It is not the school's responsibility to discipline the children...it is the parent's responsibility. The school is supposed to be there to *educate* our children, not discipline them. Parents these days all have to work and therefore are not so involved in their children's lives and upbringing, but that does not mean that it should be put onto the school to take over, or the government, for that matter. This child's parents probably had no knowledge of her even having a blog on MySpace or what she said, for that matter. I will admit what the child said was inappropriate and that her *parents* should teach her about respect, but suspending a child will only hurt the child and not help her, and probably make her even more resentful of others, particularly teachers, in the future. We are giving too much control to the schools and the government concerning the raising of children these days. IMHO
what a snobby generation...
My dryer went on the blink..my reprman says that my new one is delayed abit in transit...okay..so I wash and now I say to my men here in the house..I want a clothesline...my son almost fell out of his chair and says to me...Mom! you can't be serious!!!...you might as well put in the front yard!!!...yuck!! Excuse meee?!!
Since when is a nice looking clothes line such a taboo?...I mean its just for emergencies...you can make one pretty and descreet...
How many here still have use of a clothesline on occasion?...jeesh I'm going to get a dryer...
I can see where city and town ordinances might frown upon them...but heck...my house is nice and neat...no neighbors...granted won't be hanging up underwear....lol...
Those under 30 are the gimme now, I want it now generation....
they are the ones who will suffer because of their instant gratification needs. They spend too much, charge too much, have to compete with each other and think the free ride will last forever. We over 30 (more like 45) have houses that are almost paid for, no debt at all, money saved in the bank, don't worry about having the newest car, latest technology, biggest house, etc. In our case we have very nice electronics, clothing, vehicles, all paid for and buy what we want when we want with cash. I think we are headed to a depression, my own personal opinion, and the younger generation will not be able to deal with being told no, you can't have everything you want just because you think you deserve it.
I'm a child of the greatest generation.
That's what we now call the generation that came through WWII. My dad had been a medic with the 82nd Airborne. He never talked about it much, but by studying history I knew what horrible fighting the 82nd endured. To see the pictures of those poor guys on last night's episode broke my heart. I even looked for my dad and cried a bit.
I grew up in a small town, a very close-knit community. All of the men my father's age had been in the war, my uncle, my dad, my friends' fathers. They were an amazing bunch of men. The others who were left at home told about life here in the US, the rationing, the stars hanging in windows, the terror of seeing the Western Union delivery man on his bike riding through town with the notices that loved ones were dead. Later, when I was in high school and college and studied the war, I'd ask my neighbors and family about what they knew back then, what did they know while it was actually going on. They never felt any animosity toward the government for withholding information. In their day, they didn't say the government lied to them.
You have to remember the context. This was a global war, people were sure that spies were everywhere, and in those days information was not immediate, as it is today. Why did the government not tell the American people how badly its fleet was damaged at Pearl Harbor? Because the Japanese were listening to the broadcasts, too. So by concentrating on the fact that carriers were not hit and were out to see at the time of the attack, the government was hoping more to mislead the Axis countries than our own, and to bolster the faith of the American people that we could win the war. Remember, the U.S. was not perceived to be a world power at that time. And, the war had been going on for several years before we were involved. We held a strong isolationist position while Hitler marched through Europe well before Pearl Harbor was attacked by the Japanese.
Certainly, government secrecy would not be tolerated by the public today. That changed with Vietnam. News still traveled slowly in those days. It took two weeks for film to travel back to the U.S., be developed and broadcast. We received news very slowly in those days, and that gave the government more time to slant information. And today, the average person on the ground has access to mass communication. We can read blogs from Baghdad, listen to podcasts from around the world, and see news broadcasts from other countries via satellite.
Satellites, internet, cable technology have made the world smaller, and in a way, we can all "see" what's happening. The secrecy during WWII was meant to preserve the integrity of military intelligence. It was meant to keep up the morale of the American public, it was meant to mislead our enemies who were listening, just as we listened in on their broadcasts. It was definitely a different world in those days. And of course, I think the public was more forgiving of this secrecy, because in the end, we won the war. The lying that went on about Vietnam was such a different matter. The war went on for so long, and we weren't told how badly things were going. And with a mushy objective, eventually we were all fed up. The lies of the government were revealed. And of course there was Watergate. There's nothing like finding out that your President was in on a deal to break into the offices of his political opponents to shake your trust in politicians in general. Especially when such a thing had never happened before, to our knowledge, at least. From then on, the public attitude shifted toward a government versus the people perspective. It's definitely a different world now.
He was trying to instill in the next generation that women
The guy sounds like a real JERK.
dying tradition would refer to the new generation
x
consider the source - this generation of 20-something advertizine geeks.nm
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I was always taught the same sm
It is the thought that counts but I just could not justify that last Christmas.
My MIL (who I get along with great) collects a particular item (she has well over 100) and gives me and my SIL one every Christmas. At Thanksgiving I politely told her I just didn't have the room for anymore. I also told my SIL that if given the chance please tell her mother I don't want another one. She just laughed and said I don't think that is what she is going to get you. Even SIL agrees her mother's collection is way out of hand.
When I opened my gift from her it was of course this particular item I did not want. Her exact words were "I know you said you didn't want or need another one but I thought this one would be useful." I did thank her but I assure you it was not the most sincere thank you.
I think this year for Christmas I will give her a bottle of wine and say "I know you don't drink, but I do and this way when I visit I can have a glass." LOL!
I was taught
I was taught that a woman can be assertive, but it is rude to be aggressive. Guess shoes have different rules LOL
That's what we were always taught
We were told growing up that the use of foul language just showed how limited someone's vocabulary was. And I will say that most of the people I know well do NOT use the F word on a casual basis. For that matter, most of the people I know do not curse at all on the average day.
I always think it's bizarre that movies use so much gratuitous cursing, considering that is not how most people talk. At least that's what I thought.
And you were not taught manners
growing up - so rude.....Your post sounds like the wedding gift receipt I got which was also rude - the couple already had a thank you printed out- I took the time to get them 1 - they should have the decency to write a quick note- to have printed was not the way I was brought up.
So sorry I was taught as a child if given something
I should say thank you and accept, but then my mother taught me manners. If you do not like a gift you receive you can a) return or b) pass it on to someone who will. I give what I want to and if you don’t like, then do 1 of the above. Mind your manners. When I give something, I do not ask a person what they want and my gift comes because I want to give, not have to.
I was taught to be gracious
Regardless of the gift, you must always be gracious. They didn't need to give you anything at all and I was taught it was the thought that counts. What you do with it afterwards is up to you, but I have a few hideous gifts hanging around yet that I don't part with because of who gave them to me. A particularly creepy clown music box given to my kids comes to mind. It was given to them by an old lady who lived next door to us and I guess she thought it was nice. My kids are grown now but they said that thing always gave them the willies! LOL!
That's how I taught my kids.
Why would you call them anything different? I raised my children as to be intelligent human beings and never, ever used "baby talk" with them.
If you call them the right name from the beginning, the kids don't develop that "embarrassment" about using the right terms later on.
some parents need to be taught to....
nm
My grandpappy from Arkansas taught
me to make cornbread, not sweet, heat cast iron skillet with grease (to which corn meal has been sprinkled) til it smokes then pour in the batter, let the oil ooze up on top. It turns out crunchy crust. So good!! He used to eat it cold crumbled into a glass of buttermilk!
Spanking just taught my child it was okay to hit.
We never spanked our kid until he was around 2.5. Then dad got fed up with his behavior one day and spanked him. We also tried swatting him on the hand when he did something bad. Now my son has decided that hitting is what we do when we are mad and now hits me whenever he is upset. He never did this until he started receiving spankings. I really don't think spanking/switching is the answer and just sends the wrong message to the kids. But that is just my opinion and I realize everyone is entitled to raise their kids as they see fit.
I've been taught 'Herb' is the name, and
Jesus himself taught us not to judge others - let he who is without sin (sm)
cast the first stone. None of us has any right to say anything about how anyone else is living. We need to take care of the log in our own eye.... remember?
As an MT you have to be flexible and inventive, that's was I was taught!..nm
nm
I was taught to "always ignore the ignorant."
Unfortunately, I've run into people like that before, and I just ignore the comment, make nice chit-chat for a few minutes and "see you later alligator." At least, I demonstrated what my values are and did not degrade myself to their level. The main word here is "ignorant." There are so many people out there that are ignorant of their own manners, ignorant of other people's feelings, just tactless mules.
Grandpa from Tennessee taught me to cook it
x
Also, abstinence is taught regularly - kids'
We were always taught abstinence when I was in school. It was practically shoved down our throats, and I would estimate that only about 10% of the student population actually abstained. That is great for them, and they should be proud, but you can't leave the other 90% in the dark about safe sex, because they will be having it, and isn't better if they know all about the possible consequences of their actions and how to be as safe as possible? That's just my view of it. Safety first!
No outside contact & children and women taught
nm
Of course I would want to be equally valued. Why can't that be taught at home? nm
x
I find it very offensive that is how you taught your daughter to vote
if my other post is deleted, just thought id add some more.
Not only is it ridiculous that you told your daughter to vote that way, it is ignorant and racist and REALLY SAD
but you just admitted what this election came down to RACE
NOT POLICIES, NOT WHO IS THE BEST FOR THE JOB.
RACE. Exactly what President Elect didn't want it to be about.
how sad are you telling your mixed baby to vote more black than white, when Obama himself is black and white.
sickening and you should be ashamed, how can you live with yourself knowing that you didn't back your vote on intelligence but skin color instead? you just took us back 40 years and admitted it.
there are PLENTY of black republicans, Condeelza Rice, JC Watts, Michael Steele ETC ETC
and this guy my favorite
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wV1mRvxAyHM
AND
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxhYampIl7A&feature=related
Emeril Legasse taught me about hard-boiled eggs
Emeril says to put the eggs in the pot with the cold water, and wait for it to boil, when it's a rolling boil, shut off the stove, and cover the pot for 13 minutes - and voila!! Perfect hard-boiled eggs!!
*S*
How do you feel about toddlers being taught to call their private parts
a v*gina and a peni$ ? Just wondering
younger men
My husband is 5 years younger, no problem with age here. My kids get a kick out of it and tell dad that Mom's the boss, because she's older!!
Younger Men
Age is only an indication of how long we have been on this earth. It does not determine our level of intellect, experience, class or style. As long as he is an adult and meets your standards and expectations, that is all that matters. I have seen older me that are a mess and younger ones that are a mess. It is a very individual thing. My husband is 8 years younger and we have a wonderful marriage.
when i was younger
had to move from our home because the owner wanted to remodel. we had been there 5 years.
I'm 7 yrs younger.
x
Wish I had read this when I was younger!
Everything you said was on the mark. Thanks for a great post!
Although I'm several years younger than you (47) I would
say that you are already working at your marriage. You keep the little spats from becoming big arguments, you have a good relationship with your husband, you trust each other, you enjoy his company and he enjoys yours. All of these things are what I consider working at marriage. Those who don't "work" on these things often end up divorced or miserable. Just thank God that you have a wonderful husband and a good marriage. I wouldn't worry too much about "working" on your marriage. Sounds like you're doing a good job of that already.
Why she might be interested in younger men . . .
It sounds like your mother was devastated when your father died. Wow! Nearly 50 years together! If they had a happy marriage, she probably misses that closeness and wants to experience that again. And, maybe she's looking for younger men, because someone much younger is not likely to die before her. That means, she wouldn't have to experience the pain of being widowed again.
My uncle died just recently. He had been married to his second wife for just two years. His first wife died of cancer five years ago. And his second wife was widowed seven years earlier. When I spoke to his wife after the funeral, she talked about how horrible it was to be widowed twice, and that she didn't want to go through that ever again. But, she also talked about how lucky she was to have experienced two wonderful marriages.
Maybe your mother is looking for the same.... she wants another wonderful love in her life, but she's afraid of being a widow again. That would be reasonable, I think. However, she definitely sounds gullible, and she's looking for love in the wrong place! Has she had any grief counseling? Maybe you can talk to her about what it is she's really looking for. People do things because they are trying to fulfill needs. They repeat behaviors because there's some sort of payoff for what they're doing. She's getting something like a "sugar rush" when she meets these men online. Briefly, her fantasy is fulfilled. But, when the truth is revealed, she's devastated again. I know I'm sounding like a Psych 101 graduate, but that's really what it sounds like to me. She keeps doing this, because she likes that sugar rush. There has to be a way to break that, and to really find a way for her to be comfortable with herself.
I'm so sorry for her pain. She must be so sad after having lost her husband.
yes, she did have talent when much younger.....
She had talent when she was still a good girl........when she still had morals and ethics before choosing her so-many-wrong-paths.
just my opinion.......
Yep - love those younger men *lol*
And I wouldn't have it any other way.....
I'm with man 4 yrs younger. Nothing wrong with it.
a
I love younger men
they seem happier and more spontaneous! I dated one 3 years younger (no big deal), I also dated one 5 years younger. Go for it, if that is why you are asking.
I am 50! You are younger than me. How is that for positive??? nm
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Younger smartmouth
My stepson is only 5 years old and he is so disrespectful about backtalking. But God forbid if I say anything about it because my husband will jump down my throat. He lets that child get away with murder. He never punishes him by time out or anything. I just feel like by the time he gets 11 years old, he will be horrible. So I am pretty sure that this kid's parents just do not do anything about his smart mouth just like my husband does nothing about his kid's smart mouth. I just dont' get it.
In my younger days
I did a lot of drugs.
When my kids were a bit younger
I would always walk up to school at the end of the day and walk them home. One of my daughter's friends would walk with us and nearly every day ask if she could come over to play after school. I would nearly always say, oh, I don't care. She thought that was so cool - her mom always cared and it was always NO! I say, it's their house too, they can have anyone over if we are going to be home. If they aren't embarassed at the mess, I'm not either.
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