I found a definition of what I feel - I'm very happy to know I wasn't imagining it (sm)
Posted By: OP on 2007-07-18
In Reply to: Anyone ever dealt with (especially married to) a true narcissist? (sm) - Just me
AMBIENT ABUSE
The fostering, propagation and enhancement of an atmosphere of fear, intimidation, instability, unpredictability and irritation. There are no acts of traceable explicit abuse, nor any manipulative settings of control.
Yet, the irksome feeling remains, a disagreeable foreboding, a premonition, a bad omen. This is sometimes called "gaslighting". In the long term, such an environment erodes one's sense of self-worth and self-esteem.
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I'm so happy it wasn't spider bite. Been concerned about you.
a
Feel better but not happy
My husband and I just started the TNT diet last week. For the first 4 weeks it's no carbs and they ain't kidding! No starchy vegetables like potatoes, no fruits. I am such a bread and butter junkie I swear I could live off of it so I'm a bit cranky even though I feel good. I lost 4 pounds in 5 days and then for some reason over the weekend, which I did not cheat except for 1 meal and not badly at that, I gained it back! But then again I think water weight gain may be the culprit.
Oh shoot that reminds me I need to go put my pot roast minus potatoes in the crockpot!
Happy to hear you feel better...One thing though..sm
When it comes to federal income tax withheld from your daughter, I know for a fact that if the local welfare office or whoever is responsible for making sure she pays or they pay, doesn't send in a "flag" with their SS#'s to the IRS every 3 months or so, the IRS will NOT withhold any income tax refund from your daughter or SIL. My mother went through this with my sister-in-law. Fast forward, 26 years later, she is still in arrears to a tune of 10,000K. The only way any refund was w/h from her was when I called the IRS myself and gave them her SS# repeatedly, because they were not getting the info from the local courts....IRS guy said the courts are suppose to send the info with SS# regularly but they rarely do, so refunds are not withheld. Even now, in order for my mom to get child support that is due to her, WE have to find the trash (she is on her 4th marriage and moves all the time), prove she lives there or works there, then get the local judge here to send the proper papers to where she lives, to that judge, and then he will decide how to make her pay. I hope your daughter and SIL stay up to date on payments, or you will have to fight your way through the system and still never see a penny.
Am I just imagining this, or ----- (sm)
have things gotten a little dull here? Seems like lots of the funnier, edgier posters are no longer here. No more arguments. No much venting. Not as much of anything that made this board so interesting in the past. Used to be, a single days' posts covered at least 2 pages... now it's just a third, maybe half a page. I've been away for a while. What's going on?
Wow, I got tears in my eyes imagining that (sm)
So glad you have been so blessed
Shouldn't I have a better self-definition by now?? sm
I am up early, not sure if this will interest anyone, but want to sort of wonder "out loud" on here for a moment. I am 40 years old, yet I still am ambivalent about my religious beliefs, my political beliefs, etc. I find myself not being steadfast either way...I don't know if that means I don't yet know who I am (though by now you would think I should!) or if that means that I am just always going to be a flexible thinker? I sometimes read posts on the liberal board and the conservative board and I can always see both points of view and find ways that I feel they are both right and sometimes both wrong so I never lean to far to either side. I grew up going to a Christian church and I believe in the general overall beliefs of Christians, but then I don't discredit other religions that others grew up with either. And I don't necessarily agree with everything that most mainstream Christians believe. Does all of this mean I am ignorant? Or is it ignorant to be too closed-minded to believe that others also have valid points of view, that I don't always have to be right, and that there is more than one way to be "right"? So sometimes I feel "undefined" and wonder how I can ever define myself...then other times I think I have defined myself exactly as I want to be. Does anyone else feel "undefined"? and is it a good thing or a bad thing?
Another definition of a sex offender
I read about this some time ago and really do not remember which state but a man got out of his car and relieved himself on the side of the road, arrested and charged with being a sex offender. Anyone with just an ounce of sense should really think before they pull such stunts.
Definition of a single man...
... I heard this and told it to my then-husband, who, oddly enough, did not find it funny. (Perhaps because the shoe fit all too well.)
Anyway... this lady said that many men basically had their d*ck in one hand and their umbilical cord in the other, and were looking for a place they could plug them both in....
I think it depends on your definition of quality...sm
Iams, Eukanuba Science Diet, Purina Pro Plan, Nutro, etc. (found at Petsmart, Petco) are considered 'premium' foods, and they *are* better quality than, say, Purina Pedigree, Walmart's Ol' Roy (~shudder~), Kibbles N Bits, and other such brands that can be found in your local grocery store.
Just look at the ingredients. The cheaper, grocery store brands have grains as the very *first* ingredient (rice, corn, whatever) - not meat, or even meat meal. Dogs are carnivores. They need very little in the way of grains (carbs) - they need meat, but of course grains are cheaper than meat.
I guess it just depends on what you can afford to feed, and how important you think diet is. There have been lean times, long ago, when we've had to feed Pedigree to our dogs. (Not for long, thank goodness.) As we've been able, we've 'upgraded' so to speak. We went from Pedigree to Authority (which is a Petsmart brand) to Iams, to Eukanuba, to now, Innova (except my senior is on prescription Science Diet L/D for his elevated liver enzymes - though that may change as I've never been a fan of Science Diet & it doesn't seem to be helping anyway...)
But, if you can afford to feed better food, the premium brands are a step up from the 'grocery store' brands. Even better are the 'super premium' foods that can't be found in Petsmart or Petco. You usually have to find a small local distributor for these brands (Innova - what we currently feed, Flint River, Canidae, Solid Gold, etc. are considered super premium).
A step above the 'super premium' dry food is super premium canned food (because it has even more meat), and then a step above that is preparing the food yourself, with fresh ingredients (there are some good books out there for this, but I'm not that ambitious yet!)
I wish I had a good website to direct people to for all this. Most of this stuff I learned from the Siberian Husky listserv group I used to belong to. It's interesting stuff.
I agree with the person who said vets aren't experts on pet food. They aren't, because they aren't nutritionists. And from what I've heard, many vets are heavily influenced by Science Diet, (and other companies) starting from the time they're in vet school. As I said, Science Diet has never impressed me.
What I'm not quite understanding in all of this is why some people seem to be blaming individual pet food brands, when the problem came from a tainted ingredient that went to so many *different* brands.
The thing is, there are a lot of pet food companies, but there aren't a lot of pet food ingredient *manufacturers* here in our country. So I wouldn't hold this current tainted pet food problem against any certain brands, because I don't think we can really trust any brand where any of their ingredients come from outside our country, which *I think* means most brands other than maybe some of the super premiums. (Don't quote me on that though, I'm still investigating!)
If one wanted an accurate definition
of maturity, one would not be referred to your posts. We have harmed no one. Look in the mirror and say the same thing. . dare ya.
clarification of a definition of a word
Using sex as a weapon:
Definition: Not having sex with your husband to punish him.
And it is not using sex as a weapon or as a reward to boink his brains out to make him remember why he loves you so much and has been married to you for so long.
I googled it....Definition of Hypnagogic hallucination
Hypnagogic hallucination:
A vivid dreamlike hallucination that occurs as one is falling asleep. The opposite of an hypnopompic hallucination which is a vivid dreamlike hallucination that occurs as one is waking up.
As yuo see it is exaclty as I explained it in my 1st post.
You should thank me instead of calling me 'Dr.Jan', unless you really mean it.
It seems that you are already now addicted to Xanax, as you defend it so fiercely.
Good luck!
Doesn't offend me to hear Happy Holidays, Happy Hannuka...sm
or any way someone wants to greet me. As a basic rule, people use the greeting most comfortable to the speaker. What does burn my butt is when someone tries to tell me that my comfortable greeting of "Merry Christmas" is not appropriate. To those who are not concerned with my comfort, I have no concern for theirs.
Merry Christmas to all.
Birthday wish to justme2....Happy B-day to you, happy B-day to you. now make your wish...
I wanted to wish you a very Happy B-Day...I am aging so tomorrw I may forget or at least remember at midnight...LOL...to all you celebrating B-Days this month, Congrats
Happy Bikrthday to me, happy birthday
Unbelievable, I have reached the age of 65- where did the years go?? I would retire but gosh, darn just love this work so much, want to keep on working. Hubs had me a delicious huge chocolate cake this morning and daughter coming over for pizza tonight, oh forgot working today also but like I said, hard to give this terrific life up, that is a life in between my working!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. Hope it is a good one. nm
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I wish I wasn't right actually.....my mom was....sm
We/they all referred to my mother as *Mommie Dearest* - she was Joan Crawford's CLONE and her mom (my maternal grandmother) was Bette Davis' CLONE. Too much pressure put on little kids to be totally organized by the age of 10.....IT'S IMPOSSIBLE and not fair to the children - because this results in stifling your children's CREATIVE ABILITIES.
Happy for you that you are facing all that you are facing to not repeat (negative) history!! Have a GREAT, GREAT weekend!!!
I wasn't trying to jab you. Something's not
you claim to have ruined credit, working 3 jobs to pay bills.
Something isn't what you're making it out to be.
In my experience, people with bad credit earned it and usually have no interest in owning up to it.
you know i saw those but I wasn't sure about them
I thought they were a knock off of Yankees...but now I will definitely give them a try!
No, I wasn't--
The post about "stole my son, you brazen hussy" brings back memories. My mother-in-law actually kicked me following the rehearsal dinner and said, "Well, you finally got him!" I checked later and my stocking was torn and there was blood on my ankle. She had made this seem like a joke, but she meant it; I knew there was a friend's daughter she had wanted to introduce her son to after he left the military--I spoiled those plans. Left my home (small town) to live in his hometown (Atlanta) and never felt accepted by his mother or any of his friends, who treated me like a backwoods hick.
It's no wonder we divorced about 10 years later. My daughter is lucky that her in-laws were so accepting of her.
Wasn't in the least bit mean.
It was a simple question. You don't sound like you REALLY want any of them and I personally don't think that splitting siblings up like that is a good idea. If there is a home out there for all of them together, I hope they get it.
Never said he wasn't a pig...
he is one too. Water seeks its own level...jealous, no, just truthful. The woman is as much to blame as the man in this situation. She is a prostitute, he is a john. There is much more to life than using one's attributes to get ahead. If you had a daughter who was beautiful would you encourage her to use her "talents" and become an "escort"?
So maybe it wasn't
LOL Glad I asked. Something about putting dandruff shampoo on the face didn't seem right.
I am almost 30 and have had it since about 14. I took accutane and had great skin for about 10 years, now its slowly creeping. I'm preggers so not sure if its the hormones contributing or not but I don't want to take accutane again. I have tried proactive and just about everything out there and nothing helped except the accutane. I'll give this a shot. I have seen the Apricot Scrub in wal-mart but have never tried it.
Oh, if you have one or two problem spots that you want to get rid of quickly, Clean and Clear Persa Gel works great. If I know I have a special event coming up I will use that daily for the week or 2 prior and it helps a lot. It clears up any problem within 2 days but within the first day the redness is completely gone.
No, it's okay! I wasn't upset or anything,
just was confused when I couldn't find it. I wanted to post all that so hopefully anyone having these problems could maybe try the same thing.
Firefox is letting me into every site I use though, so crossing my fingers it continues.
Thanks for the tip about the degfrag. I haven't done it and will. :)
Can't believe he wasn't even in the bottom three! nm
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Joy said she wasn't doing much, so he made up for it
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Well if it wasn't for this grandmother
There would be no wedding. Grandmothers are the "chiefs" of our tribes so to speak. I hope the best for this young couple, but it sounds like they're being childish. Let the grandmother invite some people, unless their felons. 
ok, said I wasn't posting again, but...
 BRAVO...excellent post...I was practically jumping outta my seat reading your post...THANK YOU..and thank your daughter personally from me for giving so much of herself and caring so much for the otherwise unfortunate children out there. Her students are blessed beyond measure and she will surely be richly rewarded for her hard work and dedication to these children...again........... to you and your daughter (you are undoubtedly an AWESOME mother!)
That wasn't very specific.
You didn't say if it was noise, trash in yard, wild kids, or what.
you know, i wasn't even going to justify this --
but, ah c'mon... i do have to work. it was not a steak knife stuck in him. the incident happened while he was less than 10 feet away. like i said, i wasn't even going to justify your "concern" with a response, but your statement is absurd. you're concerned that i was typing and not watching my child ?!? do you have kids? do you HAVE to work? do you have a spouse? i am all alone in this venture called life, raising this wonderous gift of a cherished child. there's no one but me to pay the mortgage, school tuition, the car note, and on and on and on. i have no help from anyone. i could keep my eyes glued to him if i was on state assistance. get real, it was just a slight bump in the road of life.
Mom wasn't kidding - it IS all gone!
What a cute picture.
I wasn't trying to be smart, I was
actually confused.
I wasn't going to reply to this but
the more I thought about it the more it infuriates me. What child deserves to be hit? Should I hit someone just because they aren't behaving? What about when I'm out shopping and I encounter a rude person who is cutting in line/grabbing at things, etc, should I hit them? How about if someone cuts me off driving should I run them over and "switch" them? We are the adults here and children DO NOT deserve to be hit for any reason. There is always another way to deal with their behavoir. But then again, I guess as long as you don't leave welts its fine right....despicable
Too bad this wasn't your first comment
to her instead of the rudeness above.
it wasn't much mentioned or
talked about, but after Katrina, other countries DID send money and supplies and I remember right, a lot of money was given to the 911 fund. I wonder about the supplies turned away Burma a couple of weeks ago. I am afraid that instead of actually reporting news, we are dealt the canned versions and have to suffer through many of the same reports over and over.
no i wasn't offended :) sm
i feel like to each their own. my kids didn't sleep with me when they were babies. they slept in their own rooms and actually they fell asleep on their own very well. my second boy would sometimes spit up big time while sleeping, so i kept him close to me anytime he was sleeping, in his bassinet (gosh don't know how to spell that!!).
i see my hubby and his family and although they all love each other, there is no communication whatsoever in his family and they aren't near as close as i am with my mom and dad. i want my boys to grow up knowing they can talk to me about anything and that i'm always here for them. my hubby is the type that keeps EVERYTHING to himself. i'm not like that! i blame his family for not having open communication, and my hubby suffers from anxiety to a certain extent. his family situation is a whole nother chapter!
thanks for your input! 
She wasn't with him - had already taken her back to her mom - nm
x
Sorry...it was okay, but I wasn't blown away.
:(
perhaps I wasn't clear enough for you
My husband accompanied my son to practice. The then assistant coach was trying to make conversation with him. He asked my husband where he worked -- typical question, like how's the weather? My husband answered honestly and left it at that. This guy went on to tell his life story. My husband did not repeat this to anyone other than his supervisor when he realized it was a breach of ethics for him to be around him.
Again, my husband approached the head coach about the situation and without going into detail about the man's criminal history, asked for a transfer. The head coach referred him to the league president, who asked why he needed a transfer. He then told the league president, who does the background checks and would have found out anyway, why he needed the transfer. The league president then informed the head coach, who who told the assistant coach why he decided to remove him from his coaching staff. We certainly did not discuss this with any other parents on the team. We had also requested that the head coach not discuss with the assistant coach until and if it would be necessary. We were hoping to avoid the situation entirely by transferring our child, not the ex-convict's kid. Silly us to think we were doing the right thing?
The last thing we wanted was for any of this to come to light. We tried to handle it discretely. I'm guessing you're also one of those people who likes to make the people trying to do the right thing out to be the bad guy.
She wasn't saying don't talk about it, just
x
Good for them! Thank God it wasn't mandated that they be!
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That wasn't implied. One would think that with all the dictations you have
transcribed, you would KNOW that the majority of illnesses are cured by medications made by pharmaceutical companies, and not green-tea types of herbal remedies.
Fine. But that wasn't my point.
There's no need to jump all over someone who wants to help. I applaud the unselfishness.
I forgot to add that what you said wasn't an option...sm
This paper was due in her 1st period and the media center at school doesn't open up until then. She was going to take it on disk and swing by there just in case she could convince someone to open up early for her.
She wasn't going to do Easter for the girls, so they did. sm
It's ok. Every kid, even at that age, regarding you IMHO, deserves a great Easter basket. Get over it and stay out of it.
yes, i sure did andyou can't tell me he wasn't guilty. nm
;
This wasn't sweeps week.. That is in May
and I suppose you think they just kept all the money raised and bought themselves some new clothes, maybe a few new houses, and just sat there laughing and laughing about the big scam they just pulled. By the way, this telethon also raised money for children in America.
This season certainly wasn't as good as the first 2.
I'll watch in the fall, but the show has a long way to go to make up for undoing the first 2 seasons.
BTW, my first post wasn't in response to yours (sm)
I meant to respond to OP but had been reading your post and accidentally posted under yours. Not arguing your point at all.
No it wasn't, it was pulled off the table to be
reworked and submitted again in January. It won't stop the BYB, they will pay for the licence cause they are making money on all those poor dogs/cats they keep in those cages. That is disgusting and it is inhumane, but those kind of people are deceitful and rotten to begin with and they always find a way.
Maybe the garage was too cluttered, and there wasn't
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