I am sort of agreeing with your theory, but also because if she had pneumonia
Posted By: KokoPoo on 2007-02-10
In Reply to: I could be way off but am wondering if she was - sm
and was taking Vicodin and/or high-dose cough syrup, which are both are known to compromise the respiratory system, if this alone did not play a factor into it.....and let's not forget the respiratry effects of methadone. I believe if she was taking these with the pneumonia she very well could have asphixiated herself.
Now, if any of those drugs were prescribed to anyone other than herself and they coontributed to her death, that person will be facing manslaughter charges. I do not see the conspiracy theory that Howrd was with her when her son died and when she died, because I sort of would see that as normal behavior if her was her friend and confidant. I would think it sort of normal that he would be there at the birth of her child (although I do not believe it is his) and with her when she was ill if he cared for her.
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Am agreeing with you about only hr each day
I had person coming every 2 weeks and they "told" me did not need to be told what to do, super cleaning woman. I put on extra $15.00 for staring of laundry and whatever not finished I would do during the day (she came on my off day). I paid her $65.00 for about 2+ hrs and the second time noticed dust on the bedroom furniture, shower door not cleaned (she cleaned the inside), my master closet never vacuumed either time here. I sent her email saying paying her more per hr than me and I expected more. Last time here for her. Do have another coming before long- she will do 1 bedroom only (have 4 but the others not used), other things you want and along with the wash $55.00- probably about same time 2+ hr. Don’t mind paying but expect work to be done.
Um...I was agreeing that I thought she
was not a bad role model.
Doesn't sound like it is agreeing with them.
xx
Then I did not miss the point if we are agreeing
You said doing what you want, I said do what you want so I think we are in synch.
any sepsis or pneumonia would have been--sm
found in the autopsy and it wasn't. Howard was not with her when she died. He was called by the nurse, before 911 call, and could not be reached. He was not even there...but his medications were.
I have walking pneumonia
I was diagnosed Thurs. and have laid around till today and I feel better with the z-pak the doctor gave me. I am on day 4 with meds. I got up and did small things yesterday and today but I am so used to be up and doing so much more. I like to run 2 miles with my dog daily and go to the local Y to lift weights 3 x a week. I am no string bean by any means I just wish I would feel more awake and alert. Has anyone ever went through this crud? I am 36 and am wondering when I will feel back to my active self again. I just got up from an hour nap and still feel sleepy. I heard it takes some up to 10 weeks. My mom told me it stays in my system for 5 YEARS. Gosh, she was no help. Just let me know if anyone of you have any advice please and thank you!
He had pneumonia, let's not jump to judgement here,,
Heard about the pneumonia, but autopsy in and "inconclusive".
Still just so sad for such a promising young actor, father and son. I feel so bad for his family to have to keep listening to all the speculation.
Evidently, she was just recovering from pneumonia and had been hospitalized, so that might explain w
d
There is a theory that
all the wonderfully strong antibitics we have can actually cause people to have a fungal infection start in their sinuses. But I don't think all MDs are on board with that idea yet.
I rarely have sinus trouble any more, and I was on an oral antifungal for a while, so maybe that's why. But I also quit drinking milk because of all the mucus production, and that helped me. Silk soy milk is great if you want to try it. I still use other products like yogurt and ice cream, just not milk.
My mom gets great relief with saline sprays, and I have used Afrin for a day or two to get things opened up and get pain relief.
Very sorry you are in pain.
Just my theory on that...
Most refrigerator egg trays are on the door, and the door is opened, closed, and maybe even left open for more than a few seconds at a time. I guess this could theoretically cause temp fluctuations, variations in humidty, or egg trauma, thus reducing shelf life.
I have no idea. I have acutal chickens who make actual eggs and I've stored them at room temperature for several days and in the fridge in the egg basket I collect them in, in cardboard egg containers like normal people do, or even in empty cool-whip containers! They're never around long enough to go bad--always get eaten or given away in pretty quick order.
Interesting question though and look forward to hearing what people find out!
What is your theory on
Maybe rumors isn't the right word, more like being told something by another person about your spouse, but all you have is what this person is saying, with no hard evidence to back it up? I hope this makes sense because I don't want to go into too much detail about this. If you can answer, I'd appreciate it!
theory
My opinion on *rumors* or *gossip* is that if there is no hard evidential proof, take it at face value, consider the source, etc. Since you did not get too specific about this, I can only assume that whatever this person said about your spouse was not good, so just consider that whoever told you is only trying to cause trouble, perhaps out of jealousy, or whatever. If you have doubts about what this person told you, ask for proof. In other words, put up or shut up.
What's his theory?
What's his theory?
My theory on Locke's dad
We all know Sawyer was on a hunt for the man who conned his mother, ultimately resulting in the murder/suicide of his parents. He then mistakenly killed Jack's dad, thinking he was the man he was hunting.
Then there is Locke, didn't know who his father was then his long lost mother suddenly appears with that information, leading him to his father. His father sucks him in to a false relationship and then betrays him, basically conning him out of a kidney, then dumping him and running. Later to reappear as the man prepares to wed a wealthy woman. Her son ends up dead and he (Locke)rightfully accuses his father of murdering the woman's son. His father, in return, shoves him out a window, resulting in Locke's paralysis.
I think Locke's father is the man Sawyer was hunting and Sawyer's newly found sense of good will toward his other survivors will be tested when the Others reveal this to him and give him some kind of ultimatum... ooooooooooooooo
Just my wild imagination.
Is this the new Republican theory?
xx
I agree in theory
However, the Obamas are not the same as the Trumps or any other conspicuous consumer. As the democratically elected leader of the country, there should be a degree of empathy with the people who put him in office. While I don't expect the Obamas to "reduce" themselves to buying Walmart tennies, I find it hard to believe that there was not some alternative to a $500 pair of shoes, to a charitable event for the less fortunate, no less.
As they say, If you've got it, flaunt it. As the face of America in their position as first family, maybe they should strive to find a middle ground between the Madoffs and those with tissue boxes on their feet.
Well, there goes that theory, LOL. That's good,
though -- that's how we are with my parents too, very close.
Oh no....another conspiracy theory
Is this like Elvis really isn't dead, and JFK is not dead either. Ha Ha Ha
I saw these photo's you are talking about and it looks like him. His skin does not look that much darker than it should be. His face was so scarred from the surgeries and busted up so bad that he wore heavy duty makeup when going out into the public, so when he was alive and went into public his makeup made him whiter than he was without makeup, however, to me and DH it did not appear any darker than it should have been. Also, after you die your skin turns a bluish color which would give the illusion of why you think he looked darker.
As for the medical stuff/time frames not adding up, nothing has been confirmed yet. Doctors need time to go through everything before they make any statements, but anyone who talks to the media about this without knowledge will all have a different stories. Just have to wait for the coroner to tell us what the exact cause and time of death were.
As for his body "bouncing", I have seen plenty of dead bodies on gurney's before and they do move when the gurney is dropped.
Yes I too will miss his music. He was a wonderful performer, but his body is human, and human body is very frail, especially his - he seemed more frail than most.
This conspiracy type thinking also came out after Elvis had died. So many loved him so much they didn't want to believe he was dead and for years and years people kept saying they saw him. I think some tabloid even had a picture of Elvis pushing JFK in a wheelchair and claimed they were on some island somewhere.
I think people should just live with the memory of his wonderful music and performances not not try to start theories that he really is not dead and this whole thing was "staged" so he could go off somewhere to be alone or something (although I am expecting to see that in the tabloids soon).
Meanwhile I wish the media would stop their nonstop coverage of him. There is much more going on in the world that affects us news wise. Michael Jackson has died. Also Farah Fawcett died too but do they give her equal attention?
I've heard that theory before
I think it is very sad when a woman gives and gives all year long, tries to be thoughtful and generous for Christmas and probably every other gift-giving occasion, and gets no thanks at all. Maybe her DH put a lot of thought into the robe, but I doubt it.
It is about giving and not receiving and I agree with the poster below about how this holiday is really messed up. I think life is about giving, not just one holiday, but if there is such a holiday, then one should at least use that time to show his spouse that he appreciates her.
Just a little trinket from each kid that they picked out. For whatever the robe cost, he probably could have found something more personal... he does live with the woman.
I don't think the OP's post was about receiving. It was about giving. That's all she does.
Big Bang Theory, How I met Your Mother,
The New Adventures of Old Christine, CSI Miami, Bones, AI. I'd like The Biggest Loser better if they could fit it into 1 hour instead of 2. When I had DVR, I could speed through it in about 45 minutes. That was great.
who defends the theory that alcoholism
can be inherited from relatives and renders an alcoholic innocent and helpless? I mean that it is already in 'one's genes', a predisposition. I disagree with that.
But I believe that living in a certain environment can turn out many alcoholics, but it is in the end a self-inflicted misery.
Your approach works wonderfully in theory...
but in reality, this rarely works. I have been an RN for 13 years now, doing MT on the side. I do not look at this from a one-sided MT point of view, but rather from a mother's point of view.
As a nurse, you must know that even when you try to educate your patients as kindly and nonconfrontationally as possible, when you start to point out to them things they may be doing wrong (such as not taking meds consistently or correctly, continuing to smoke when they have emphysema or COPD, eat tons of salt on a low-salt diet, etc.), IMMEDIATELY a wall goes up and the mentality is "How dare you try to educate me on MY life and point out my shortcomings".
Public health nursing is even trickier. From experience, even being as kind and non judgmental as you can possibly be, 99% of the time, this mother does not want to be aware that other people know about her problem. Most of the time, they think "OK, if I just ignore it, it will go away eventually". If others come to them and say, "Look, I know you have a problem, let me help you with it", they only get more embarassed knowing that now everyone at their kids school knows that they are not getting rid of it, and she will likely tell you exactly where to go.
I agree with what you are saying, that we should try to help each other out more. I am not being judgmental, but I guess after 13 years of this, I see the way things are and not the way we wish them to be!
I don't know of any nurse that will make a home visit. In fact, our county is getting rid of school nurses starting next year. They will have 2 nurses rotating throughout 24 elementary schools in the county, none in high school or middle schools.
From experience, the Health Department is usually the only entity that can do anything about this. They can come in and give the mom some education, determine why the child can't get rid of them, etc. For some reason, most people will accept that kind of help from the Health Department before they would a concerned parent from their kids school. Maybe they feel like nobody knows if the Health Department comes, but everybody knows if another parent comes over?
You seem to have a very positive outlook on things. Good luck in your schooling.
Rules of Engagement, Big Bang Theory, House ...
The New Adventures of Old Christine, CSI Miami, Bones, Design Star, Biggest Loser.
Ooooooo! That's an awesome theory! I'm a total Lost freak too. SM
I can't believe I missed this thread!
Sort of. sm
I had root canals on my front teeth and could never get the money to have them capped. On a Sat night before I was to start a new job the following Monday, I bit into a BLT and a front tooth shattered into pieces. A dentist saw me on Sunday emergently and was able to built it back up - I certainly was not going to start a new job missing a front tooth. Good luck.
can anyone help me sort?
I have microsoft word, works, notepad and word pad. i'm wanting to sort a list in alphabetical order. in word, i find sort under tables, but it doesn't sort....?? any other way to do it, or suggestions on why its not sorting the list?
many thanks.
Sort of the same here.
Personally I would rather someone take back the gift than to waste my money by hanging onto something that they don't like or doesn't fit. It is the thought that counts and doesn't bother me.
I am a thrifty person, everyone knows this. My MIL buys me things that I consider frivolous and if I can return them and get something similar for substantially less $ and then use the extra money for something else we need or donate it or take the in-laws to dinner, I will. I know she doesn't like it because she will comment on the items such as "didn't that coffee pot have a timer, clock, and all the gadgets?" Yes, it did but we wouldn't use those features and it was an extra $50. Or a hot chocolate maker that just took up cabinet space and was used once, the day after christmas. I returned it for $45 and bought really nice meat thermometer, which I tell everyone my MIL bought for xmas.
The nice thing is she has always, and for everyone, included the receipts for most items. I would never, ever ask her for the receipt. I have returned things that were purchased with her credit card and had them credit her back. Whether she notices or not, I don't know. I don't say anything because I don't want her to feel odd about it but I just think it's the right thing to do and it's not about the money.
Besides, I tell them every year not to get me anything - I grew up with little at the holiday and family/friends were emphasized. Not the case at the in-laws. They shower everyone with gifts and then everyone departs for home.
I have an HP, but and I sort of have to press
out, but I've got it down now. I think I know what you are talking about, but it just sort of pops out, once you press down on it. Then you have to set the new one in there and click it in by pushing it towards the back. I hope this makes sense. Also, I try to say nice things to my printer, so it will act right. This always worked for faulty copiers and fax machines when I worked on-site. People think I'm weird, can you tell? 
Glad (sort of) to know we are not alone
I forgot that my vet also did the skin scrapings and came up negative.
I hope someone will offer some help. I feel so bad for her and when it gets to the point that we are waking up at night...well, I just feel so bad for her.
I will let you know if we arrive at a solution.
I sort of know where you are coming from
with the prices of houses by me. Most people probably don't realize that 400,000 in some areas does not get you much and you probably can't find a 3 bedroom decent house for under 350,000. I think people are getting the wrong impression and thinking you want to live way beyond your means when in reality you just want a decent place to live. As I said, I'm in the same boat and it stinks. Just be careful; sounds like way too much debt to be comfortable with your current situation. Have you thought about moving somewhere cheaper? I am sure your wife can find a job as a nurse anywhere, maybe making even more money; also if she is an RN they can work just weekends and make a full time income. For you, you can always work at home doing MT full time and part time with 2 companies putting in 50 or so hrs a week for now. You'd save on any kind of childcare that way at least while the baby is an infant. But then you may have to put off school. Unfortunately this is what happens. We can't have it all as much as we'd all like to. Sounds like at least you do have a few options, though, the way I see it; so good luck whatever you choose to do.
There must be some sort of natural
repellent on the market that you can spray on the furniture so that when he jumps up there and sniffs around, whatever he does, he won't like it and will get down. I have heard of something similar with cayenne pepper or something in it that keeps them away...Will see if I can find what I am thinking and post it if I can.
I'm the odd one out, but I sort of agree
I do have a child in advanced math. He's in 8th grade taking Algebra and he'll be 14 at the end of the month.
My thing is if your daughter tested well enough to get into this Physics class, then she must be one smart cookie! However, if you encourage her to drop out when in fact she can probably do the work and just has to work a little harder, I think you all will regret it.
A GPA is wonderful to have at high levels; we all know that, but if that high GPA is being earned because the child is in "easy classes", then it doesn't mean much at that point.
I say keep her in the class. She'll get through it, and she may not get a 98%, but she may find it a nice challenge, if she's as smart as you say she is, which I believe she is to be accepted into a Physics class in 9th grade. Let's not kid here!
Good luck to you! I think she'll do great and she just has a little nervousness as maybe it's not coming so easy right now, but it will come! I hope this all makes sense! 
What sort of response did you get?
.
Maybe he could be sort of a general fix-it guy
Someone in my area actually has an ad in the paper that says 'Rent-a-Husband'. For household things like building shelves or cabinets, lighting a pilot light, trapping and removing a mouse in the bathroom, or a bat in the garage, things like that. Petsitting and dog-walking are good options for a rent-a-husband, too! Or for busy people, someone to take their car to the shop for a tuneup and oil change, so they don't have to. Back in the 1970's, during the gas 'shortage', when lines for gas were hours long, people made money by taking people's cars to the gas station and filling up for them.
Maybe he could build those cute wooden children's toys you see at the fancier toy stores. And either sell them or give them to organizations that give toys to needy children. If he's 'artsy-craftsy', maybe he can come up with really cute dog-collars & matching leashes, or cute wooden pet-beds that look like miniatures of the real thing. If he likes to write, and is smart, maybe he could start an advice column for soon-to-be-seniors. (Nowadays 61 isn't really a 'senior' - I think it's closer to 75-80!) Or, if he likes kids, maybe a 'rent-a-grandpa'! Or else maybe a small mail-order business, like on eBay.
Well, that's all for my ideas, I need to get to work, myself!
Hope he finds the PERFECT idea!
sort of still keep in contact, but
They didn't go to HS with me. One I've known since probably 1978 when I was 8 and she was 6 and we were visiting here on vacation, then my family moved here and she and I have been BF since 1985...only keep in touch by email and occasional phone calls.
My other one I've known since 1995 and we're in touch by email too.
Our lives are just too complicated and too far apart by distance to really see eachother, but we can catch up instantly with eachother even if it has been a while
To take any sort of antidepressants is
the worst advice one can give. Lexapro and all others are associated with risks of suicide.
Figure it has to be drugs of some sort.....
o
Defending Sanjaya, sort of...sm
Stopped watching during the first season because it was a popularity contest, not a talent contest ("ooh, he/she's HOT--voting to keep him/her"). I hear AI updates on the morning radio show and heard the opinions of Sanjaya, all of which may be true, however:
>>"For those of you who are wondering why Sanjaya - the equivalent of MT outsourcing to India - is still on American Idol..."<<
Ouch. He is a (I believe) 17-year-old kid who entered a contest and seems to be handling the critism a lot better than I could.
>>"...Sanjaya is in that group - he has ruined this show and its integrity."<<
It is the fault of Stern, the sites like you mentioned and clueless voters that have ruined the show. Again, the kid simply entered a contest. If he decides to quit, then he will be criticized for that, too. 
I kind of sort of can identify with what you said..sm
I am a mom of three wonderful boys, and grandmother of three beautiful granddaughters. This goes way back, but my own mother does not even know my sons birthdays, much less my granddaughter's birthdays. She knows my sister's kids birthdays though, and their kids birthdays. kind of hurts. My sister has always been her *favorite* so her kids mean more to her than mine do, but then she will *complain* that my kids don't even know her as a grandma. Well, gee, I wonder why? After 37 years of never acknowledging their birthdays, christmas, or any other special day, why would she expect them to consider her their grandmother? If she had taken an interest in them when they were younger, they would be taking an interest in her now. This breaks MY heart, as I know it should be different, but unfortunately the past cannot be changed. So, I know exactly what you are talking about.
that is sort of the way we started off with our neighbors...
but, then we started to see the real THEM!!!!!, time after time after time...thats why that saying that dr. Phil uses is so true "good fences make good neighbors". we should have never started associated with them in the beginning. up until then i had never even allowed my children to play in the front....I should have kept to me rules.
Sort of. Lost dad in 1983.
My dad died at the age of 61. I was 21 at the time. My mom and I have a very difficult relationship, and always have. My father was my buffer in that relationship, and not having him around has made things with my mother worse. Since 1983. That's a very long time. I miss my father, and not a day goes by that I don't think of him or remember the life lessons he taught me in just 21 years. He is with me always. The first several years after he passed were difficult, but so much time has gone by now that I realize how much a part of me he is. He is the reason that I have wonderful relationships with the men in my life -- my husband, my sons, my friends. So every day that I have is a gift that was at least partly shaped by him in the 21 years that I knew him here on earth. And that makes me VERY happy.
I would definitely feel some sort of obligation
I would have stopped and checked to make sure the dog was okay or I would have left a message unsigned due to the OP's situation and at least made sure someone knew about it. It's not the poor dogs fault that they have owners who don't take care of them. I have an indoor cat, but you can bet if he got loose and was hit by a car, I'd want to know about it, especially if he was left in the middle of the road and wasn't lucky enough to just get up and walk away. (I know that's a different situation since he doesn't usually roam free like this poor dog seemed to)Do you have any animals? It doesn't sound like it.
About posting - I'm sort of a newbie sm
When you talk about your family I've come to understand that DH is husband, DS is son, DD is daughter - what does that first D stand for? I haven't been able to pick up on it from the context. Thanx!
No clue but my DH does this sort of stuff too - sm
though he does not help with any school projects, I do all that stuff. But he will grill them relentlessly over something that is either really stoopid or totally irrelevant and get them crying, etc. generally shortly before bedtime, and unless I totally prove him wrong he does not apologize to them. I just tell him to back off and leave them alone, it does take a while for him to actually do this though. Though he has been improving lately, maybe because I keep drilling into him that he is going to lose what communication he has with the girls in a few years (they are 7 and 9) if he does not knock it off. You might want to stress that your girls will soon be tuning him out on a permanent basis if he does not stop and stop now. If he needs to schedule in time to help them with something then maybe keep an appt. calendar on the fridge and have them write down their project due dates (in big red letters) and have him write what day/time he can help them and then keep to it. This may help him with his own organization and if he weasles out of helping, make a note of it too on the calendar (and "reschedule" the appt as well) so later he can't say, well you never asked me for help, etc. He should not be waking them up, they need their rest and and he can wait until morning to make himself feel better. Why are men such total jerkks at times? Genetics?
The recipe is a secret - sort of!
It's funny. I can make the cole slaw, but there's not really a recipe. And the sour cream, mayo thing was not her usual. She was probably trying to stretch out the mayo. That's my cousin's house, and his mom never had enough mayo on hand! LOL The same with the wine vinegar. Grandmom made sort of a face over it. She used plain white vinegar at her house. The cabbage was always sliced paper thin, by hand. Then onion was grated on one of those plane graters, so that the onion turned pretty much into juice. Then added a splash of vinegar, salt and pepper and stirred it up. Then, in a coffee mug, she sprinkled a bit of sugar on the bottom of the cup, filled it about halfway with mayo, and then thinned that with whole milk or cream until it was the consistency of salad dressing. Then mixed it all together. And not wanting to waste a drop, she always took some of the cabbage, put it into the mug and tried to clean out every drop of the dressing. One coffee mug of this concoction was enough for half a head of cabbage. Her cole slaw leaned more to the sour side with vinegar. It wasn't a sweet cole slaw, at all. She added grated carrots on special occasions, like T-giving, which is when the video was taken.
She was barely 5-feet tall, and shrunk to well under that as she got older. My mother was her firstborn child, and weighed nearly 10 pounds and breech, born at home. Amazing. My Grandmom was one strong lady!
yes because if there is some sort of misunderstanding/misprint you may be
you don't really want this hanging over your head, do you?
I have a cat with a sort of similar problem
only I adopted her as a 1-yr-old. She's a purebred that was surrendered to a vet to be PTS because she wouldn't use a litter box. I adopted her, thinking I could change her. Unfortunately, after trying EVERYTHING (reward, discipline, multiple litters, multiple boxes, multiple locations, vet examination, antibiotics, even PROZAC, I finally gave up. The rescue I adopted her from says you cannot give the cat away to anyone but THEM - ever. So after a year & a half of trying everything, I moved to a new place and she was going all over the kitchen floor. Every morning I woke up to having to mop the entire floor.
So I called the rescue, and a different (very RUDE) woman now runs most of it. She said the cat was 'unadoptable', and was trying to insinuate that it was somehow MY fault. (She forgets that SHE is the one who originally went to that vet and saved the cat's life, knowing full well that it had elimination issues). She told me I had only 2 choices: 'Live with the problem', or 'Have her put down'. If she were 17 years old and in questionable health, I'd consider it. But a 3-year-old, extraordinarily healthy, beautiful and playful purebred cat? No.
I did find a way to come to sort of a compromise with her. She will use the litter box (for pee only) if I'm nearby, as she knows if I see her use it, she'll immediately get a treat. Sometimes this means she'll go in there and squat and do nothing, but since it's t least a step in the right direction, she still gets the treats (though maybe fewer pieces).
I was able to gradually convince her to go just in one small area of the kitchen floor, just outside the litter boxes. I used a pet-gate to block off half of the kitchen. The part she has access to is where the food and litter boxes are, near the back-door.
If you clean up cat pee using a cleaner that has ammonia, it will continue to attract them, because pee also has ammonia in it. 'Nature's Miracle', on the other hand, has enzymes in it that break down & eat the ammonia crystals that are left, and truly does eliminate the odor that attracts the cat. It's made for carpets, but I've found it effective on linoleum, as well. So, after I clean up the pee puddle, I use Nature's Miracle on the spots where I don't want her to pee. Then, in the one spot where's she's allowed to do it, I use Windex. My problem was compounded by the fact that my house isn't level, and the floor slopes. The pee would run along the baseboards clear across the kitchen floor. I solved this by taking 3 paper towels and rolling them up into a tight cylinder, and placing them against the baseboards. This not only solved the problem of the 'travelling pee-puddles' by absorbing it 100%, I also found she actually learned to pee ON them. Whever I see a soiled one, I simply pick it up and place it in a plastic bag to be tossed out.
Anyway, it's not a 100% acceptable solution, but for me it enabled me to live with the problem by making the cleanup quick, easy, and efficient. Also, it's in a part of a very large kitchen than I just never use.
I had made the mistake of spanking my cat one time when I just couldn't take it anymore, and like you, she didn't like me for a few weeks. (She has the memory of an elephant!)
BUT! Once you get the problem resolved to where you're no longer P'd-off about it, the cat will sense it and will relax. My cat was never very sociable to begin with. Isn't a lap-cat, wouldn't sleep with me, preferred not to be petted, and when I had to comb her out (VERY thick-coated Persian), I had to trim her claws really short, so as not to need a blood transfusion afterward!
Once I was able to find a sort-of-acceptable place for her to pee, and my anger about it went away, we now have a good relationship. (Geez - sounds like marriage, doesn't it?) She gradually began to associate me with good things, like treats, playing with her favorite toy-on-a-string, petting, etc. The grooming problem gradually resolved as well, to the point where she now even purrs when I comb her (ever so carefully, so as not to pull her hair), and she has even been perfectly behaved about bathing. She now comes and sleeps next to me all night, and although still not a 'lap-cat', will let me hold her for a few moments of just petting.
I don't know all of her background, but part of the reason I came to accept that 40-50% is as good as she's going to get about using the litter box, is that I think she's probably been hard-wired to go on linoleum. Possibly her breeder kept the kittens in the kitchen. Or else the original buyer got her too young, like 5-6 weeks instead of 8-10 weeks of age. But whatever, sometimes concessions can be made both on the part of the person, and the cat.
I assume you've probably already taken your cat to a vet. (That's the first step - make sure there's no bladder infection. She could be trying to tell you something by peeing on the bed. Or, if it hurts to pee, she may associate the box with pain, and thinks that going in a comforting place like a bed, will ease her pain.) The original owner of the rescue where I got my cat said that in some cases, they've had cats that peed on the floor, and the urine test showed no infection, but they put the cat on antibiotics for a couple weeks ANYWAY, and in most cases the cat stopped having problems. So that could be a possible thing to try.
Sometimes cats dont like certain litters, and love others. Many of them prefer the UNSCENTED kind, too. I had a problem with my cat liking only a certain unscented, finely-granulated, super-absorbing kind like Super Scoop or Arm & Hammer. Trouble was, it would never fail - no matter where I went that day for cat supplies, they'd be out of my brand! I solved that problem by creating a BLEND of 3 different kinds that the cats love, and where I'm bound to find at least ONE of them when I go to the store. My blend is roughly 1/3 of the expensive kind (Super Scoop or Arm & Hammer unscented), slightly less than 1/3 of the store brand of fine-grained, clumping cat litter, and about a cup of regular clay cat litter, either scented or unscented. I put just a dab of scented in on occasion, JUST IN CASE for some reason that's all I can find at the store. As a result, the cats are happy with any combination-ratio of those 3 litters, and in addition it saves me money because I use far less of the expensive kind.
I also scoop the boxes frequently (pretty much whever I walk by and see something in them), and about every other day add a tad more fresh litter, and once a week I dump the litter, scrub the box with soap & hot water, and refill with fresh litter.
If you're cat's using the litter pan at least some of the time, then that's good! You may be able to deter her from the bed by just throwing a big sheet of plastic over it during the daytime, and getting her a new little bed of her very own.
I learned a cool way to see if you have all the urine out of something, or to find other spots where the cat might be cheating - it's a BLACK LIGHT. You just turn off the house lights, and walk around holding the black light over the carpet, the bed, etc. Any urine spots will glow in the black light. If you truly have all the urine out, it won't glow.
Another thought about putting her outside. Does she LIKE to go outside? If so, you might inadvertently be getting 'trained' by her to put her out when she pees on the bed. Also, unless you can wash the spot she soiled with something like Nature's Miracle, even if you can't smell the pee, the cat still can. Like dogs, their sense of smell is hundreds of times greater than ours is. You could also try putting a pet gate across your bedroom door, or just keeping it closed and off-limits to her except when you're there.
One thing I learned about the rough-play thing: When you get a tiny kitten, it's really cute when they 'wrestle' with your hand, or 'attack' it. But once they weigh 10-12 pounds and are stronger, it's not so cute. (Same goes for puppies!) So try using your hands ONLY for good things, like petting and treats, and use a string or a cat-toy for playing. My cat likes to sit behind the shower curtain and bat at it when I poke it with a toothbrush. It's become her morning ritual, and it totally makes her day!
Anyway, I feel your pain. I consider myself lucky in a way, that my cat only pees on linoleum.
Good luck with your kitty!
I think it's beautiful! Has sort of a "modern
I'd rather have a brightly colored purple (or red or blue or orange or whatever) house in my neighborhood than a bunch of tan ones with faded paint.
Color is a GOOD thing.
Could it be some sort of abdominal migraine?
Sort of - I generlly buy some hamberger meat, and whatever - sm
is on sale and bring it home for 2 or 3 days worth of meals. My DH does 95% of the cooking. We generally buy what is on sale, whole chickens, thighs/breasts, pork chops, have tacos, I do pot roasts now and then. My mom used to make out a weekly list every Wednesday or so, and do the weekly shopping Thursday after work. We would drop about $100, this was in the late 80s/through 90s. My DH is actually better at shopping than I am and comes home with a lot for $50. Scan the food ads and plan around them, best way (and cheapest) way to do it.
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