I am invited to a Birthday party for a friend of mine, whom
Posted By: Need some help on this one on 2007-09-13
In Reply to:
I have known for many years. Her mother and my mother were friends. Her mother died a few years ago.
The problem is that I am a nonsmoker and my family all 100% nonsmokers. I maintain a smoke free environment at all costs. My friend smokes heavily as well as about 95% of her family. They will all be there. I have some health issues, not respiratory, and I do not want the second-hand smoke exposure. In addition, my eyes burn, my hair and clothes reek of smoke, etc. What do I do? This is a special birthday for her marking a milestone. If I don't go it won't look good. . . if I do go I will be very heavily exposed to the smoking for the duration of the party, I am sure. What do do? Thanks for any advice you can give.
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Update on birthday party I attended for friend SM
A few days ago I posted about being invited to a birthday party for a friend and was afraid of being exposed to cigarette smoke. I was hoping this was in a smoke free environment, and just as I thought I was not there 15 minutes before her daughter (who is battling cancer at the age of 39 and has been for 5 1/2 years) lit the first cigarette. Her cancer has now returned for the fourth time, this time in the mandible and breast. Immediately three other people started smoking and from there it went haywire. The guest of honor had now even arrived before I wanted to leave.My eyes were burning like fire. I stayed 2 hours, ate very little, as all the food and cake were sitting out in this environment. I left before they even served the cake andI made a lame excuse about having to do some shopping at the mall. One thing was true . . I could not wait to get to the mall, went into the restoom and washed my hands and arms and splashed water in my eyes.
I made my mind up today that never, ever again do I compromise on this issue. The first question I ask is whether or not it is a smoke free environment. If not, count me out. I spent those two hours in a room that could not even be considered a large room with 85% of the people smoking heavily, even while we ate. To top it off, went outside and had a parking ticket on my car!
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My daughter's b-day is in September and I'd appreciate any suggestions for a party. She's at the age where I don't want it to be too babyish, yet don't want it too mature. Want to have it at our home too. We have a pool but don't want to plan anything around that in case the weather is not cooperating. Thanks!
Daughter wants to attend birthday party
My daughter is 10 and her friend will be 11. Her friend has been to our house numerous times and she is a SWEET girl. HOWEVER, her parents and their home is incredibly dirty. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a neat freak myself but their home is filfthy, as are they. Took their daughter home one day and they came outside, along with one of their younger sons who was in his underwear that looked soiled/brown/gray. Her mother seems nice enough but I get the feeling there is some sort of mental illness going on. Every time I've been around her I can tell she has major hygiene issues, built up plaque on her teeth and dirt under her nails, dirty clothes, etc. I'm not trying to be judgmental; I just don't want to allow my daughter to go to their house. Her friend is more than welcome here. I'm concerned this is going to possibly cause friction with the girls. I've talked with the mother of another friend in the group and she understands where I'm coming from, as she feels the same way. Wondering if any of you may have any suggestions for me. I know the girls are getting older and I'm sure my daughter's friend is realizing that her friends aren't allowed to her house, yet she can visit them. I really feel for her and I wonder how many girls will actually show for her party, yet I don't want to run the risk of my daughter coming home with lice or something.
Anyone have any ideas on games to play at a luau birthday party? sm
My daughter is going to be 10 at the end of September and wants a luau themed party. I have decorations, a pinata, party favors and cake, but need something for games. I was thinking about pin the coconut on the palm tree! But not so sure I can draw a decent enough tree and coconuts!! LOL.
Any ideas for games?? Thanks. Also, cant be anything to wild as the party is being held in a party room at Pizza Hut.
I just called my friend and sang happy birthday on her lunch hour...sm
Juliet is a kindergarten teacher in NYC...She said, "We just had our Valentine's day cupcakes and pudding, then they went to lunch"...All I could say was "They're not going to gym next, are they?" She said, "Well yeah, that's their next class". I said, "Get ready for a barforama!"....If I hadn't already lived through it I could'nt have said it...Poor Juliet Cat
:-) Birthday Girl - Mine is not an Ipod - LOL!!! sm
Sorry...just giggling over here. Maybe when I take this one back I should get an Ipod instead ;-)
A friend of mine has this
and she has accupuncture monthly which says helps her tremendously. She also changed her diet around a lot but I don't know the details of that. I'm sure you could Google it tho'.
A friend of mine had the same
problems as you did. I'm sorry you spent so much money for such a lousy vacation. A friend wanted to come home early because of the same things you mentioned.
I experienced the same thing in Puerto Rico. I found the people to be very rude. The hotel was nice but unfortunately not the people. I would never set foot there again.
I just returned from Aruba and absolutely loved it. We stayed at the Riu Palace and it was so beautiful. The people were exceptionally nice and went out of their way to make you feel welcomed. The food was excellent. The beach and water were beautiful. I plan on returning next year.
A friend of mine only had a
viewing/wake for immediate family & close friends only & didn't have a formal funeral. Sometimes I think that's the way to go. It always seems insensitive to me how everyone treats a funeral like a party, laughing and having a good time while the family is so torn up. It doesn't seem very respectful.
A friend of mine got her
accounting degree from Phoenix University, and she has an accounting job now.
Just ran into a friend of mine tonight who see msg
is doing a lot of research and warned me about the harmful effects of microwaves on food. Studies show that cholesterol levels in many studies is actually elevated in foods when heated in a microwave. There are other effects as well.
Also, I used to take the warnings about aspartame rather lightly, hearing both good and bad. Last year on the Today Show they reported that a study from Duke University claimed it was safe. I think after tonight and after doing a search on it I will try to avoid it altogether. I think I am safer with sugar or Stevia.
Just wanted to pass this along. I know this information is probably not new, just somewhat shocking and worrisome to me.
I've never had one but a friend of mine
did. She was 15 at the time and after a lot of pressure from her parents and her boyfriend's parents, she had one. She still feels guilty to this day.
Personally, I am pro-choice. There are just too many variables to make it 1-sided. Fortunately, I've never been in the situation of having an unwanted pregnancy. I have always used birth control (2 forms before I got married and then just the pill after marriage). I've had 3 pregnancies, each of them planned. We've decided that we do not need anymore children, so I've had a tubal. If that ever fails, I would carry the pregnancy, unless it posed a significant health risk to me. I'm not thinking of myself in this case, but my 3 children who need a mom.
I do think that abortion has become a method of birth control for so many. There need to be limitations and guidelines to its use, but please don't take it away completely. I also believe that pregnancy has become a way for many young, unwed, uneducated mothers to get a free check every month. I think those children should be adopted out, also. But these are just my opinions.
A friend of mine was treated much
worse than that right after surgery. For one thing they wouldn't even fix the broken A/C even though her room was about 90 degrees! The plastic surgeon botched her surgery, so she had huge open wounds he couldn't close. She was allergic to tape, and could only tolerate one kind, but even as she'd tell nurses this, they'd stick Band-Aids on her! So it wasn't even just ONE bad nurse - the whole bunch was careless at best all the way up to sadistic. She should have sued.
Sounds like friend of mine
A friend once told me that when she goes to a restaurant she and her husband get down on their knees and pray at their table. I asked why they do that. Her response was "We are setting a good example for everyone to see"
A pilot friend of mine
who flies in and out all the time said he wouldn't take his family there OR let his children ever go there for spring break or anything else. It's too dangerous. There's a lot the tourist are lucky they didn't run into. Kidnappings are taking place more and more as the drug business is booming and people being held for ransom to make MORE money. Innocent tourists have been killed in crossfire in drug related shoot outs. I just say better safe than sorry; there are lots more places to vacation than this.
A good friend of mine had a lap band
However there are a lot of hoops to jump through testing wise before you can have those procedures done including a psychiatrist. Also if you do not follow the directions you can become sick, which means you cannot over eat and must exercise. She is doing fine with it, but did it mainly because her back bothered her so much. Come to find out her back is still an issue and she needs surgery to correct that. So, if it is a last resort, I'd say it is worth a try, but I would not do it with all of the complications and risk of infections unless it is a serious must.
Friend of mine got the same note from her kid, but she was only 23 at the time.
s
I love them too...a friend of mine got me hooked..
I am now on 9...Stephanie Plum is a great character. I love the East Coast references because I grew up in Philly, so TastyKakes have a special place in my heart!
I'm a "healthy gal" as a friend of mine likes to say
Just a bit over 200 pounds now, which I never thought would happen to me. I was always able to hover around 150 until I hit my mid 30s and then I just packed it on like a bear going into hybernation. I started WW in April and lost most of those 11 pounds right away. Then vacation came along and I just got out of the habit. I KNOW the program works. My grandmother did it in the 1970s and was lifetime member until the day she died. You just have to make up your mind it's time to get serious. I'm convinced no diet or lifestyle change will stick unless you're ready to commit 100%. I'm back on track again and hope to be in Onderland (below 200, as it is called on the WW chat boards) very quickly.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do. Like I said, it isn't easy.
A friend of mine did some prostitution for awhile
It was before I knew her. She was very young and homeless and trying to survive. While her case isn't what we're talking about here, as she would have been underage anyway, I still can't imagine putting someone in jail and calling them a criminal because they're trying to survive the only way they know how. And of course, once you have that criminal record, it makes it even more difficult to change your life circumstances. It breaks my heart to think of her as young girl and everything she went through. Today you'd never know she lived that kind of life unless you really knew her and could see the emotional scares she carries (most of which aren't from the prostitution but from the abuse and incest she survived). She's an amazing person, with a huge heart, who spends most of her time fighting against poverty for those who can't speak for themselves.
While I don't know the mind of a prostitute, I'd imagine that most fall into the profession because they have few options available to them. Some don't have options, family support, education.
I think by leglizing and regulating it, you'd have less disease and less drug abuse.
A friend of mine stayed in a very nice chalet when she went. SM
I can't remember the name of the place, but very quaint A-frame chalets. They didn't have indoor pools or anything like that, but there was a pool on the complex. The location was awesome from the pictures I saw. They seemed to be in the woods surrounded by trees and a stream right next to the cabin. I'll see if I can find out the name of the place. She was pretty friendly with the lady who ran the place and has stayed there several times.
A friend of mine told me about these cute blankets
She's making them for her nieces, and her daughters (11 and 8) actually want to give their cousins these blankets. She also bought the fabric from a local craft store and plans to attach a book. Gift done with love! Love homemade gifts!!
A very good friend of mine had ablation and no regrets.
She has no more periods. This is just a little over a year, and she was having very serious problems, had to have transfusion twice due to the heavy bleeds prior. She was willing to try this before hysterectomy, and it worked for her.
A friend of mine is a chemist (Ph.D.) and specializes in solvents.
She knows exactly how various detergents work, and she says Tide is the best. I can afford to use Tide, because I use so little detergent. We have a front-loading washing machine and it uses much less detergent that top loaders. Rather than use detergents made specifically for front-loaders, I just use a very tiny bit (about the size of a quarter) of liquid Tide. I get a small bottle with coupons, and it lasts me months doing laundry for 3 people.
This happened to a friend of mine from high school........sm
He had mono after we graduated from high school and was off work for about 5 weeks. He went back to work too early and, while driving home from work one day, his spleen just burst and he crashed into an oncoming log truck, killing him instantly. It was really a double tragedy because the first people on the scene to find him were his mom and dad, who had a bad heart anyway. His dad suffered a major MI on the spot and had to be taken to the ER. His poor mom lost her son that day and almost lost her husband.
A friend of mine has a husband with myasthenia gravis
and it affects his eyelids. He can't hold them open and had special glasses made witih a wire that he puts under both eyelids for support. I hope it's not that, and certainly may be something else, but I think an ophthalmology exam is in order and then maybe referral to a neurologist. Good luck. Keep us posted.
Sounds likea control freak and a doormat. Friend of mine just divorced after 23 yrs of being the
s
Not being invited...
I know the feelings of not being invited places by husband. But when the other wife is going that is just a slap in the face. I mean how rude can he be? That is wrong. It sounds like he just don't want you to go because something going on he knows you wouldn't approve of. I myself got dumped on this evening. Everyone and their wives and children were going to a superbowl party at a friends and my brother-in-law and sister-in-law and everybody going but he got dressed spur of the moment and said he was going and took my son with him but didn's say get dressed or are you going or nothing. I didn't know he was leaving until he went to walk out the door. So obviously he didn't want me to go. I know they couldn't be doing anytning wrong with kids there but it hurts my feelings that I wasnt included. So I know how you feel.
or just maybe you were invited
because she'd like to share the joy with all her family. but with your attitude, you may as well stay home. Personally, i would bet she'd rather you would just show up dressed anywhichway and nevermind the gift. Maybe it would be an opportunity to re-connect with the mother, aunts, etc. On the other hand, I am sure not everyone that RSVPs shows up.
Really? People are invited to a shower over the phone?
If I were invited to a shower via a telephone call, I might think that my inclusion in the party was an afterthought. It's far nicer, and manners dictate, that a written invitation be sent for a party, especially when the party includes gift-giving.
There is no way to defend asking guests to address their own envelopes for thank you cards. I stand by the opinion that it is tacky. If you know someone well enough to ask them to a shower and expect a gift from them, then you should make the effort to get their address and send them a written invitation.
Bud was married 27 yrs & his mother never invited her to call her Mom
s
Your parents sort of invited themselves to spend -
the night at your place instead of their usual Christmas day routine. You were kind enough to offer to let them come with you to your husband's Christmas Eve party, but for whatever reason, they don't want to. I would just go on ahead to the party and have fun! You never know, maybe your parents would ENJOY just a quiet evening at your house after the long drive.
They still have THREE choices: Stay at your place by themselves, go along with you, or go back and do it the original way, coming to see you just on Christmas Day. The ball's in their court. And think how disappointed your husband's folks, plus all the cousins, etc. would be if you two didn't go.
I suppose the fourth option is for him to go alone and you to stay home lone with your folks, but that doesn't sound very fun. So I'd do the party, and you'll get to see BOTH sets of parents, and they'll both get to see you.
The first turkey I made and I invited my poor dad over . . sm
I cooked the poor bird with the green bag of giblets inside!!!! I will NEVER forget the look on my dad's face when it appeared from nowhere! I was 25 then. Many years and good meals ago. . . LOL. Sorry, you asked!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. Hope it is a good one. nm
nm
a friend's b/friend died last year, drank, took vicodin...
Happy Birthday to you, then you can wish me a happy birthday on Friday! sm
Aquarians Rule!!!!! LOL
Boy's 7th B-day party
I am trying to think of a birthday party idea for 7-year-old boys at home. We usually do bowling or Chuck E Cheese-type party, but this year we are trying to not spend as much on the party because we are going on a big vacation 2 weeks after that. I am thinking scavenger hunt in the back yard, but any ideas would be great. Thanks!
B-day party
I think it was my daughter's 13th birthday that we rented a karaoke machine. There were kids ranging from 3-18 at that party and they had the time of their lives!
party
how about manicures and pedicures
party
Kerstin...What a lovely name! Do you have a pool nearby (recreation center)?...We used to....and it was free if you lived in the township....That'll be good recreation and exercise for kids and adults. Just make sure all the kids can swim...and don't rely on a lifeguard (I jumped in once after a kid before the teen lifeguard who was chatting up a young lady could be bothered to even look up).
Light snacks after swim....Knorr Swiss spinach dip with bread and taco chips, have a mild salsa available too, barbequed pork shoulder/pulled pork, barbequed chicken of just plain old hot dogs on the grill, buns, fresh sliced tomatoes and fresh fruit salad with seedless watermelon, canteloupe, strawberries, green grapes, pineapple chunks (Cool whip adds a nice touch) for desert. All these things you can do the night before (except the hot dogs) so you can relax and enjoy the moment. Just microwave the meat. Juicy Juice Berry always works....you could add a little ginger ale to make it more effervescent.
Considering there may be so many adults, you could ask them what their tastes are and if they'd be willing to bring a covered dish or help with prep.
All that matters is that Kerstin has a wonderful time. Peace and Joy to you Kerstin and all ya'll have a happy life together.
Cat
party
That was a brilliant idea....I've gotta write that one down for when I have grandchildren....
pinata party? .............nm
Scrapbook party
I did a scrapbook party for 4th grade. The girls had to bring two pictures of themselves. They would decorate two 5x7 pages, one they got to keep and the other with a special happy birthday message for my daughter to keep in a scrapbook. She still loves having that and she is in 10th grade.
Party idea
My daughter turned 10 this spring. We had a birthday breakfast kidnap. The girls received a bogus invitation (their parents and I had chatted ahead of time). Instead of the party time on the invite, we showed up at houses between 7 and 7:30am on a Sunday morning, woke them up, and took them to a diner for breakfast in their pjs! It was the quietest birthday meal ever! They loved it! At each house ALL the girls would go wake up their friend. Poor kids!
After breakfast we came home and made lip gloss, decorated flip flops, and wrapped tshirts in tie dye shirts (I dyed them later and ironed on a transfer with the party date on it...).
The goody bags were from the Dollar Store and were vinyl shower totes with a toothbrush, really cool looking hairbrush, and a picture frame which I filled w/a picture from the restaurant.
I had made a tshirt shaped cake which DD decorated with gel to look tie dyed.
HTH
Looks like you are ready to party.
I'll be right over. LOL Have a nice weekend. Plan on having a couple of cocktails myself. It has been a long week.
Yes, let daughter go to the party.
nm
adoption party
Congratulations! It'll be a grand celebration! Not many folks out there like you. Give me some particulars...
What is her name...her favorite color...favorite snack...is she allergic to chocolate...is she a princess or a tomboy?...Does she like art, music or dance....maybe baseball, or basketball, hockey?...So many factors to consider. School's already in by you...How many kids and adults will be in attendance?
Cat
adoption party
I have a 7-year-old daughter and she is into Hannah Montana and tea parties. We had a tea party this year on her actual birthday (we had a "big" party at the movie theater, thus the lack of funds! I made chocolate edible tea cups (Google it, it's easier than it sounds) day before. Have thinly-sliced ham and cheese croissants (or just cut the crust off of white bread) top them with a toothpick and grape. Slice strawberries and fan them around carefully placed mandaring oranges and pineapples(out of the can). Serve the tea cups about 10 minutes after they leave the table. Invite some girls that you know she will be going to school with, this will help her become familiar with them. Have dress up items or barbies out. Board games have been popular for us, or swing sets and outdoor play. Ask the other mothers for guidance here. You can find lots of other simple ideas at birthdaypartyideas.com. Love the site and use it all the time. Good luck. It sounds like you are already on the right track.
Adoption Party
If it is hot still where you live, why not have an ice cream sundae party. We have done this for the kids a couple of ways. Once we got parfait cups from the DQ- they were happy to donate some, and bought ice cream and different toppings and sprinkles along with some fruit. Another time, with a group of boys after school we used a piece of gutter (new) about 6 feet long and let the boys make a huge banana split with all the fixings and Reddi Whip in the can. They loved making the huge dessert and it was a lot of fun for all. Just an idea.
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