I agree with this poster and so does Dave Ramsey. sm
Posted By: MT and worn out on 2008-07-04
In Reply to: You have several issues here sm - Reality check
Get your hands on anything of his and follow the recommendations. He has helped me greatly. As Reality Check says, and I agree, our economy is in dire straits and not having any financial worries will be worth the effort to get there.
Good luck to you and your wife.
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I am currently on Dave Ramsey's
program and just paid off my 1st bill yesterday. Everything he says makes complete sense. It took a while to build up my 1st emergency fund, but it really is not as hard as you think if you put your mind to it and stick to the plan.
Try Dave Ramsey
After you tell him (and you HAVE to tell him!) check out Dave Ramsey. He has a show on TV every night at 8 p.m. (central) on the Fox Business channel if you have cable, or check out his book from the library, The Total Money Makeover. He teaches you how to plan a budget and work TOGETHER with the finances, one of his most important techniques, and living within your income. In this economy we are all struggling--your biggest mistake was trying to keep it from him.
You must be an follower of Dave Ramsey. That guy is the best!!!
nm.
According to Dave Ramsey, my hero...sm
He says if you have cards you have paid off or no longer use, you need to call and write the credit card company and let them know that you want the account closed. And that you need to keep checking with those institutions to make sure they have actually done what you asked them to do. IMO, I would do the same thing..cancel them completely and then cut them up to boot. Hope this helps.
RE: Has anyone every heard of Dave Ramsey - See message
He has a program called Total Money Makeover. Has anyone ever tried it?? Thanks!
I've seen Dave Ramsey on Fox News
but never got a chance to try to find his web site. I will though, hopefully sooner than later.
We had our dream car a couple years ago. My favorite color (blue) with blue interior and a very large luxurious car that got unbelievable 30 mpg. It was the first time we spent more than $1000 on a car except when I had a brand new Horizon back in the ྌs. We loved that car, only 50,000 miles on it, thought it would last us forever, but little did we know it was in a flood. We started smelling a musty smell coming from the trunk when summer rolled around and 3 years later, it was trash, all rotted out underneath, nothing electrical worked on it. Even though it had all those things wrong with it, I still loved it, but it had to go to the graveyard. Broke my heart. (They don't make that car anymore).
That same year, a friend gave us a calendar that had daily numbers on it. If the number came up on a certain day, you would win those $$ for that day. December 29, our number came up and we won $100. The same day, DH bought a car with a blown engine for $100 without knowing he had won the $100 from the calendar. So, in reality, we had a free car. We pulled the engine from my blue baby and put it in the $100 car and it lasted 4 years until the windshield and transmission started to go.
We are still going to save the engine from my blue baby because it still has a way to go to hit 100K just in case this other car has engine problems. Then, if not, we will probably sell the engine later on to get a few extra dollars needed.
I've been working on a budget since last year that I downloaded from MS and was surprised to see that we rarely have any $$ in most of the columns, but insurance and taxes are eating us alive. No way to get out from under all the myriad taxes (federal, state, local, property, school, township, breathing, emergency, sales, etc.) and insurances (health, home, car, disability, vision, life, etc.).
Have to agree with this poster
I'm no Bible thumping holy roller but I do know that if you TRULY understand what it means to be a Christian, you don't go in for the evil aspect of Halloween. I don't think what the pastor said and did is appropriate though. He sounds a little over the top to me.
I have to agree with the poster above
Your sister and BIL did not borrow the quad, simply agreed to bring it to their home because your husband was too tired to unload it. Sounds like the BIL was trying to be nice. Hubby was too tired to unload it, but expected BIL to do it himself at his house???
I agree 100% with the poster below - also...
You do not want to be his second choice. Either he is free from this other woman and available to date you in a proper manner or he is not. Him saying *things are not working out* is SO typical for someone who wants to play the field and still have the security of someone else. He has been with her 7 years, is not happy, and has not moved on??? You deserve so much better and do not need someone like him. Let sleeping dogs lie!!! 
I agree with first poster
At least this is a decision she is making herself. You can't change the circumstances, but you can help her find the best facility possible in her circumstances.
I lived 500 miles away from my mother, and when she got sick with non-Hodgkin's, it was very hard because I couldn't be down there to help her as much as I wanted. My son was 12 at the time and I had to be here with him, although I could and did go down and stay with her a couple of weeks at a time (my son too when he was out of school). And I was with her for the last three weeks of her life.
I know this is very hard for you. Just be with her as often as you can, talk to her on the phone as often as you can, and help her find a good facility that will take care of her needs. She sounds like a very independent, sensible lady. She understands that you love her and want the best for her. Cherish the time that you have with her. 
I agree with the other poster, (sm)
probably something "dressier" than "regular" business but not black tie, somewhere in between. Other poster is probably correct about them saying that to hopefully avoid too much sparkle and low cut or short skirts with the women. LOL.
then I would agree with another poster..
you should probably find someone to talk to about it..with your husband.
Have to agree with the above poster
While my mom is only in her 60's right now, my dad has already passed and I have NO doubt that when the time comes to take care of my mom, I will get little to no help from my 4 siblings. I think often the burden falls to one child and it would be in your best interest to get power of attorney and just do what you need to do.
It's not worth fighting with your sister when she clearly doesn't want to contribute much. It will just cause you more stress and as a result, more stress on your dad.
When all is said and done, you will sleep well at night knowing you did all you could for your dad. Your sister will be the one who has to live with herself knowing that she didn't care enough to be there for him.
I agree with above poster....
This is being blown way out of proportion. This is normal dog behavior. Maybe you should keep your child in your own yard. It would be different if this dog went into your yard and then attacked her!
I agree with this poster. nm
h
I agree with the poster below
Just because he is your future son-in-law doesn't mean he owes you anything. It sounds to me like you want to cause problems between him and your daughter because of this when you say you think she should have talked to him. This is between you and him. You asked for help, he told you what he could offer, take it or leave it.
It sounds to me like he made the comment about not having things placed or set up because he expects that you would want that. I certainly don't know your relationship with him or your daughter and do believe there are always 2 sides to every story and feel like we didn't get the second side to this story.
I don't say any of this to make you feel bad in any way. Your situation reminds me of my own mother. Except that she will do whatever she can to get things resolved before asking either of her son-in-law's to help and they are more than willing to do anything for her...she just knows that they work full-time, have a family, and life is hectic. When she does ask something she asks them directly (not through the daughter) and asks for bare minimum - she usually gets much more than that on the son-in-law's own accord not because he is obligated.
I agree with the other poster.
Unless its a kid that you know has been in trouble before, I wouldn't assume anything. My son is not a teenager yet but he says things that he just says because he thinks someone else will think its funny or cool...not because he is doing it or agrees. I also have 3 older nephews, in and just beyond teenage years, and they do the same thing. Two are great kids, they say things but clearly do not participate. Being the aunt they tell a lot more with honesty than they do to the parents. The other...well is just irresponsible. I think he says a lot to keep up with people too but wouldn't put anything past him if peer pressure is involved. Just his personality and demeanor says a lot.
If you sit down with a teenager and talk to them as if they are "adult" you would be surprised some times at the things they will tell you in honesty.
Agree with this poster, you cannot let
this slide. Also, if he is posting pictures on the Internet, in certain parts of the country schools monitor this and they can and have taken action against the student. You need to be firm on this and definitely discuss it with his father. So what if your son is devastated by his father's reaction, in the long run it is the best for him.
Agree with poster below that
you need to get out of that situation, especially after reading what you son said. He is being damaged, and I have seen firsthand what that damage can do to you as an adult. Dysfunctional doesn't begin to describe it. Take action ASAP. I wish you the best of luck, I know it isn't easy.
I agree with another poster. . .
You are trying to solve a problem by yourself. But the problem involves two people. Your husband has to participate in the solution.
My husband and I have similarly hectic schedules. We're lucky if we eat 1 or 2 meals together in any given weak. He's a horrible cook, but he can heat things up, pour cereal in a bowl, and make sandwiches. I love to cook. I prepare meals ahead and freeze.
Your husband may want to continue his breakfast social time. That's fun, and everyone needs a little socializing outside of the house. But for other meals, both of you will have to communicate and coordinate. He needs to call home, and if you are going to be the main cook, you'll need to start planning and preparing for quick meals.
It takes a bit of practice and a lot of communication. But you BOTH need to agree to a plan.
I agree with the above poster
I would get some Omeprazole and start taking that also. I find Miralax works great. Lots of water also!
Definitely agree with above poster, too sm
NO PURSE.
Money and license in FRONT pants pocket. You very well may find yourself in such a crowd/push of people that a stranger could be right up against your back, so put nothing in your back pocket.
Staying with a group is very good advice.
Oh, and don't pet the police horses, they're working!
I agree with this poster, however - sm
the G-spot is quite elusive I think....though it does exist. I have only had that experience 3 x in 23 years, quite amazing actually and totally different from a regular manually stimulated orgasm. I remember on my 18th birthday friends gave me the books the Hite report, which is a sex survey basically from the male and female perspective. It was quite enlightening to me as I had only been sexually active for about 3 months at that point and new nothing about the clitoris or masturbation, etc. and had never had an orgasm at that point as the 2 guys I had been with were not very knowlegdgeable or didn't care that I didn't have an orgasm (or assumed I did). I did not even know what one was then. But definitely get educated about your body and what turns you on in the genitalia basically. Sorry to be so graphic but that is how your body works.
Agree with above poster.
In addition to hydration, your puppy is probably being given antibiotics and anti-emetics. They are probably also monitoring blood tests and body temperature. If you vet feels your dog needs to stay, I would listen. Ask them to explain their reasoning if it is not clear to you. I treated many parvo dogs and the ones that left early always came back in worse shape and ended up having longer hospital stays in the end (unfortunaly some of them didn't make it at all). Parvo is a very serious disease for a pup, and I would think twice before bringing the puppy back home.
Sounds like your puppy is doing well though if she is eating and holding it down. That is a very good sign. Hope she continues to do well.
and I agree with both poster's responses....s/m
Sorry this is happening to you and esp this time of year with all the multi-religious holiday festivities going on in this country all this month....truly hope it ALL gets resolved soon for you!
Please...how ridiculous...I agree with the other poster!
I am so sick of this crap, everyone screaming RACIST if you even mention a race other than WHITE in ANY context. Perhaps it's you that is racist if you feel that way :)
Totally agree with this poster - sm
If he is maintaining his grades, not getting into trouble, give the kid a little slack. Let him grow up.
However, on the same note, I would also make it clear that when he does decide to take these trips to see the girlfriend, he is responsible for anything that could go wrong with the car. All a part of growing up too.
Hang in there mom. Take a deep breath and give him a little space.
I agree with this poster. For your own sake.
NM
Agree with poster above. DO NOT take $ out of 401K...sm
>> My H wants to take 15k out of his 401k and be done with it. He says we are still young and we can still make it up. >>
I was watching Suze Orman's show recently, and she had someone who wanted to do this. The woman was in her early 30s and wanted to take money out of her 401K to pay off $22,000 in cc debt, just to be rid of it.
Suze said NO, and here's why - taking money out of a 401K now, instead of at retirement, means you'll have to pay penalties (state and federal) plus taxes which will equal about 35%. So in order to end up with $22,000 (to pay off her cc debt), she would actually need to take out about $35,000 from the 401K! So it would cost her $13,000 to pay off that $22,000. Not worth it.
And if that isn't bad enough, look at what you lose by not having that $35,000 in your 401K for the next 30-40 years, earning money for you like it should be. At at average rate of return, that $35,000 would turn into around $353,000! So that's what it's *really* costing you. Tell your husband that and see if he still wants to do it. ;o)
Suze said we need to stop looking at our 401Ks like their our piggy banks/savings accounts. They're for us to live on in *retirement.*
I agree with this poster's mother - it is difficult
Things have changed a lot and obviously it is easier now than it was when I did it (dated someone from a different race)- but there are sometimes huge cultural differences, not only in different races but in same race from very different parts of the country. A lot of traditions that you find important - someone very culturally different (same for religion for that matter) may not. You have to be thick skinned and very committed. A good partner is hard to find.
I agree with the poster. Didn't care for it (sm)
My 6yo was bored with it too, and it just seemed too preachy. I get and appreciate the message they were sending, but the way they did it in parts seemed to be over kids' heads. It seemed more like a grown-up movie to me, and my daughter has not asked to watch it again.
I agree. From the poster below with opinion different than Wannie.
uio
I agree with poster below - maybe check thyroid. sm
A little over a year ago I had what I thought was a *severe* sore throat. Over the course of about a week, I also had a low-grade temp., body aches, headache, chills (but only off and off) then came night sweats, heart palpitations and tachycardia (142 bpm).
I thought I was coming down with the flu, or maybe had strep throat. The weird thing is that the symptoms would come and go, and were always much worse at night. I'd feel horrible at night, then wake up feeling pretty much back to normal.
I finally got tired of it and went to urgent care, and when they saw how high my heart rate was, they did an EKG and told me to go immediately to the ER. At the ER, they gave me fluids, but my heart rate didn't come down. (They asked me if I was anxious. Nope. Calm as could be, and felt pretty good right then, actually.) They drew blood, gave me fluids, etc. and found I was hyperthyroid. I was in the hospital from Sun. afternoon until Tue. afternoon (mostly so they could monitor my heart to make sure it was okay, do more tests, and give me some pain relief for the throat pain).
What I had is called subacute granulomatous thyroiditis. (Maybe Google it and see if the symptoms sound like how you're feeling?) They *think* it's caused by a virus (it's not an immune system thyroid disorder). So basically it runs its course, they treat the symptoms, you're fine. (Though a small % of people may be left hypothyroid and need to go on thyroid replacement.)
I had follow up with an endocrinologist, and he said he was really surprised the docs in the ER diagnosed me so quickly. I guess most don't. If they hadn't thought to check my thyroid levels, I don't know what would have happened!
Now the runny nose symptom you have doesn't fit with this, so maybe it's not your thyroid, but it's easy enough for them to check your thyroid levels and see. They sent me home with Vicodin for the pain, and I needed it! Whatever it is, I hope you get relief for your throat pain soon. I'm sitting here remembering how much it hurt, so you have my sympathies. :o)
I read all the comments and I agree with the poster who wrote
'One has to teach people how to treat you' and one has to tell people what is imoportant to oneself.
It is inexcusable not to call or meet one's mother for mother's day and Christmas, etc.....
Oops, it's Ramsey...nm
/
I am "juvenile post" poster. "Looney" poster is some
x
Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares rocks!
I appreciate the format of that show--trying to better a restaurant in his "loving" way.
BBC America is just great in other shows. How Clean is Your House? and You Are What You Eat are the other great shows, IMO.
LOL, they have been looking for Dave at my house, too, he must move a lot! :-) nm
nm
Oops, above posts about wrong Ramsey show.
x
go see Meet Dave with Eddie Murphy.
The kids will love it - and so will you. He played it so well! Cracked me up...several times.
Dave is my Baby Daddy who owes $27K,
that's probably me calling....sorry.
"So Damm Lucky" Dave Matthews.
.
Dave Ramsy, The Total Money Makeover....
His message, "Live like no on else so later on you can live like no one else." Budget is not a bad word and saying no to the kids is not wrong and does not make you a bad parent.
not poster you responded to but that poster has
everyone with different opinions is allowed to post here and poster said they were making a contribution in the name of pro-peace....give that poster a break please....
What an awesome post! I agree, agree, agree completely with you.
 You are right on the money in my book! 
ya got that right! Poster DOES know or else she
She is 54 after all.............not a baby, not a young adult/teen who really needs guidance.
She knows this is DEAD wrong but appears to be *seeking* something from all of us, as she said she was posting *in a safe place*............meaning here on the forum.
We know right from wrong from FIVE YEARS OLD on..........she knows what she is doing is most wrong/incorrect.
I just think she is craving attention, personally.........
I will go along with the poster below who --sm
said she was *dressed*. Actually quite a personal question and no one else's business what I wear or when. I notice you didn't answer your own question, either.
If it is the same poster, she is only doing sm
400 lines in 8 hours. I guess anything is better than that. That isn't even minimum wage. If it is her, then she definitely needs a new career. 400 lines in 8 hours is ridiculous. I do 400 lines an hour. These career is only for the hardy ones.
this has nothing to do with what the poster is asking....
nm
The poster was right....
you can't change your dad, just stay happy. But, you could invite your parents to go to church with your family - if they say no, just tell them the invitation is open at any time. You could also just cheerfully mention to your Dad that you saw such and such a job in the newspaper and thought it was something he might be interested in looking into.
You're wise enough to know you can't change another person, but you can give him a little encouragement - plant a seed and see if it grows.
Happy Trails to you.
But you would have if you could have, and above poster did try (sm)
So why are you both saying parents don't owe their kids help with getting through college? Poster A tried to help hers and jlynn would have helped hers if she could.
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