I'm sorry for your friend, but you can't blame the dr.
Posted By: Happy MT Robin on 2009-03-01
In Reply to: Friend in kidney failure, on dialysis now, said she could not understand "them" (ESLs) - Very, very ticked off
My mother had the exact same ailments - diabetes that she did not control as well as she should that eventually led to kidney failure, liver failure and death. Mom was always concerned about what other people thought, yet she never failed to ask questions of her physicians. If she didn't get an answer that made sense to her, she continued to ask. She was very stoic so sometimes the drs wouldn't take her as seriously as they needed to take her and there were several instances where something went on waaay too long because Mom wasn't kicking and screaming about it.
Be that as it may, it is YOUR health. If you don't understand something, it is YOUR responsibility to ask questions until you do. It doesn't and shouldn't matter if the doctor is English speaking or not. If you don't understand something, ask. You are your own best advocate for your health.
She needs to take someone with her to every appointment from now on. I hope she gets the kidney she needs.
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a friend's b/friend died last year, drank, took vicodin...
I don't blame you (sm)
One bit for being mad. I would be too. It definitely doesn't seem fair. I mean, if this is common practice, you could spill coffee on your carpet and get all new. It really doesn't make sense.
By the way, I hope everything works out for you, and I'm very sorry about the trouble you are having. It sounds like a matter of insurance companies being bombarded with claims due to mass damage in your area, so they are getting stingy with their pay outs. Definitely not fair. Is the state isnurance commissioner doing anything to help?
Please don't blame yourself. (sm)
I do not know if this has anything to do with your situation, but I thought I would share.
My mother experienced a similar situation in regards to my oldest sister (5 other siblings). The counselor told my parents that my sister was attention-seeking. She was in her 30s and married with children when they sought counselling together. She is now in her late 60s. Our mother is still living and in her late 80s, and my sister still has her moments.
"Birth order effect" is very interesting:
1st born must cope with the loss of attention to 2nd born.
2nd born must constantly cope with the attention-seeking 1st born.
3rd born must cope with a perfectionist 2nd born, and it keeps going on.
Our 38-year-old daughter also has her moments, but overall we have a very good mother/daughter relationship.
My opinion only, but I think a daughter's personality can be affected by the relationship with their dad. My husband was diagnosed with a passive-aggressive personality, and I do think our daughter was affected by his personality. But, instead of arguing with her, which is a trait of a PA personality seeking attention, I try to avoid conflict and praise her often, as she can be kind and loving, and God has been blessed her with many talents.
May God bless you and your daughter to experience a more loving relationship is my prayer.
I don't blame you
I saw one of those in my flower bed one time and almost had a heart attack. 
I do not blame you.
Maybe couples should fill out questionnaires before getting married that include questions about vacations as well as the usual concerns.
Oh yeah, I guess they probably cover that if you use one of those on-line dating services like e-harmony.
I don't blame you....
With all of that happening...your daughter's safety is #1. Even though she got suspended. I would still have her carry something like the pepper spray again for her protection just in case, but tell her to be extremely discrete about it and not show or tell anyone about it, not even her friends. You can never be too protective when it comes to your children, in my opinion. I would ask the people you are meeting with if it was their daughter what would they do? If your daughter is attacked, she may be scarred emotionally/mentally for the rest of her life. I have 4 of my own, and I would do anything to protect them. Your a good parent; I would have done the same thing.
I don't blame the mom
13 years old is too young to have a boyfriend.
I don't blame you for being really sm
mad and I sure wouldn't have anything to do with her anymore, but not everybody has a work ethic like that. My hubby has been doing work for friends for probably close to 40 years and WOULD NEVER EVER do something like that. Actually he underbids himself alot and is happy to do it for people What goes around comes around and it has for us in many many instances when we were on the end needing help.
Don't let this color your faith in people. You just had a bad experience like we all have had at one time or another for one reason or another. If it hadn't been this it would have been something else with the same people. It just took 7 years but it would have happened!
I don't blame you~
How aggravating that must be.. I hate dealing with people over the phone like that.. It stresses me to no end & I can't even work some days with that kind of junk.. hoping you are having a better day by now..
please don't blame his heritage...this could have--sm
been anyone from anywhere. He was more american than he was korean and I really don't think his nationality had anything to do with his emotional state. I am not defending him or what he did, but please don't make more of it than what it is. There is going to be enough anger about all of this when the shock wears off and it just does not need to become a race thing, too. JMO
I don't blame you for feeling that way at all...but (sm)
I really think if you say anything it is just going to put a wedge between you and your dad and your new *relative*. It stinks though, I agree with you!
Clearly to blame for what? In your mind. nm
.
well i always blame work!
so they can't find out a lied because i work at home !! :)
I do get what you are saying, but if they are my friends I ESPECIALLY wouldn't want to tell them i dont feel like hanging out! Maybe that's part of my immaturity and im on the road to working on that :)
Really can't blame the govt on this one - sm
We all take responsibility for ourselves.
Let's talk about the decisions we make and advertising.
Some people see an ad for some kind of "miracle" weight loss drug. We know it isn't going to work the way the ad says it will but... still, some people buy it, the company makes big money.
Same thing with some of these shady lenders. They may be sitting on a lot of foreclosures at a time but they will STILL make a lot of money off of the rest of the people.
Now lets talk credit cards.
Same thing here. I have a Discover card that I had paid off about 2 years ago. I still had a sizable balance on another card but my plan was to close the Discover and keep the other and pay it off too.
When I called Discover to close my account after I had paid it off, they wanted to keep me of course so they offered me a fixed rate of 3.99% for three years on any balance transfers, no transfer fees, etc.
Okay. I kept the Discover, transferred the balance and closed the other card. I am now 2 months from having it paid off again but....... even though I have requested numerous times that they NOT raise my available credit, they keep doing it. My available credit is now up to $14,000.00.
Excuse me but I am NOT that stupid as to charge that much on a credit card, no matter what the interest rate is but..... Some people do it and end up in big trouble.
The trick of it is that people need to be smarter than that. It's OUR money, OUR risk. Card companies don't give a rip if they over extend credit to people. They will find a way to squeeze the money out of them.
I don't blame the stores at all
Its a vicious circle for everyone, and everyone is loosing money. The stores because people won't buy what they used to and the consumer because they have to pay so much more for what they do get!!!
I don't blame you, you did the right thing.
If you're taking care of them, they're fine at their own house. The owners should understand that. If they can afford to take all of these trips, they can afford to board them. It's not your responsibility to provide them with dogsitting service whenever they want to go somewhere. My sister has two very big, very obnoxious German Shepherds. They are bullies and their behavior isawful, one even flunked out of obedience school. She has asked if they could come to my house when she has went on a trip and I've had to say no. I have 2 Rottweilers, but they are quiet and calm in the house. I also have a cat who co-exists with my dogs just fine. My sister had the nerve to say "but they don't like cats, so you'd probably have to lock him up somwhere while they were here!" WHAT??? I don't feel bad about saying no and you shouldn't either.
If it were me, I'd totally blame my husband.
You mention in your post your BIL had a trailer stolen and a vehicle broken into at his house so that should have been reason enough to get a little energy up to take them off the trailer. A tough lesson learned, yes, but it's only 1700 dollars. Did you happen to see the other post above where a woman is in danger of losing her house?
I don't blame you. Have you checked zillow.com
or had an appraisal lately? Not that it matters - but would be something to shove at them if they get pushy - unless of course it comes in lower than you want. If you don't NEED to sell - hang on to it if at all possible. We sold our land 5 years ago and wish we would have held onto it - it almost never depreciates!! Best of luck to ya
blame to person who put it out there and didn't keep an eye on it. can't sm
blame the lady for buying it at the price the daughter stated whether she knew what it was or didn't know what it was. fancy cars mean nothing these days. i pay more for a nonfancy car than most pay for a fancy car because i don't have good credit so it cost me twice as much. why are you saying the person who bought it is a rotten person? she gave the price that was asked for it. why lay the blame on her? would you not have done the same thing. garage salers and buyers are out for deals period. why would she not high tail it out of the neighborhood to fly to more garage sales if that was what she was out shopping for that day? what would you had done had you caught up with her? asked her to give it back? that would be rotten in itself. she got a deal. get over it. geez! it isn't the poor lady's fault and doesn't make her rotten.
I am asking in all honesty to not blame the stores
My family is in the grocery business, and like jss said, everything is going up. I don't believe the stores are trying to make a profit off of the bad economy, but groceries have to be trucked in (paying the drivers, the gas, the workers that package the items, etc.). Outrageous prices are eveywhere. My father refused to order red peppers due to the cost and the fact that he knew his customers would not pay for them. It works both ways.
Honestly I don't blame you for macing
the dog if it's owner isn't going to be responsible enough to keep the dog on his/her property. Have you contacted the owner of the dog and complained? My husband is a K9 officer and he gets these calls ALOT and it ain't all pitbull calls, it is just dogs in general roaming around in other people's yard and not on their own property. The mace won't kill a dog, but it sure does hurt really bad and makes the dog think twice about approaching you.
I would not blame granny. She tried to get daughter
NM
I don't blame you for not wanting a woman
I am a massage therapist (not practicing right now), and I know how it can affect guys (when doing normal professional work ... nothing funky). - I doubt your hubby would be too keen on a male working on him though. : )
Maybe you could do a bit of a strip tease for him or even just whisper in his ear about how hot he is.
I'm just doing a simple, sweet card and a $5.00 scratch-off lottery ticket with a big heart on it ... and probably a bit of hanky-panky. Not to promote drinking, but if you are a bit inhibited, you could drink just a bit to take the edge off (a shot or so). We seem to have extra fun when I do that.
easier to blame you than look in the mirror!
.
the doctors overdosed him can't blame him if he
now refuses to take it!
I don't blame you for being upset.. afterall..
a vacation is to "get away" from it all, even if does mean your family.. but I am not the best person to give this kind of advice, I absolutely hate to be put in a position where I'm gonna have to "feel mean or bad" about telling them NO~ or I can't do something, etc.. will pray it all works out for you..
Many people do this in this situation and I cannot blame them.............nm
nm
I did NOT blame his culture-reading problem?
I gave the freshest stats at the time this a.m. - that he was a 23 y/o Korean boy....
only thing i stated about Korea and their culture was that in the schools they teach antiamericanism and I'm not blaming the culture, I'M STATING A FACT.
Geesh........
Even if the poster is dead wrong and clearly to blame? nm
trudat
I blame the parents. Children are not getting the love and attention
xx
No, he is not..I have a friend...
coming to feed the cats (live in the country, have 8 outside cats!) and 3 inside cats. I feel bad making her come and mix food for him...we live 25 miles from town. A vet told me that he will either eat or just drink water and would be okay...but I will worry about him! I have been cooking extra chicken, turkey, etc. for him..my husband says he is spoiled!
I had a friend who had those and
apparently they just observe them. Maybe you should get a second opinion if you are having pain. Hope you feel better.
too bad- my best friend
has 'the gift.' That is about the only way I know to put it. She cleans my house for me and she can do in an hour and a half what it would take me all day if not two days to do. And it just looks so clean and bright and shiny when she is done!! LOL I mean, there is clean and then there is CLEAN!! And when she folds my laundry I don't even need to iron it later! We have the best deal worked out- she has one of my vehicles on a sort of 'permanent loan' and I pay the insurance on it and I also try to pay her a little extra here and there, and she comes over and helps me keep my house clean and helps me stay on top of my bills. I have a pretty bad case of ADD.
If you were in this area I would maybe lend her to you for a while, LOL. I know she would like to find just one or two 'regulars' that she could clean for to make a little extra money on the side.
Friend
If she is really a good friend, stick with her. REAL friends love you warts and all. If her behavior is causing you true anguish and she is an acquaintance... go your separate ways. Money comes and goes -- true friends don't.
Lilly
My friend's SON. not MOM!
Sorry for the typo. I am a BAT brain today!
Friend? Some friend! sm
Yes you should be mad, but only at yourself. Giving $$ once I can see. Maybe twice. You have been used by this 'friend'. Doesn't matter how nice you think she is, you have found out otherwise. You are out $$ which you generously gave in thinking it was being used to help her out, yet she has taken advantage of you and therefore, that speaks reams about her character, or lack thereof. I would be disappointed in her and mad at myself for falling for her sob story. I'd tell her exactly how I felt from the heart and would end the friendship since it was based on lies. She has the characteristics of a con woman. Time to cut the losses and move on...and learn!
friend
If it is something that is opening her up to being hurt in anyway most defintely i would tell them. It is their choice then to decide what to do. You know how some parents really shouldn't be parents and others are great parents!
friend?
I actually had to call a parent before. My daughter had asked ex-friend to stop writing things about her in her online diary which she did for a while. When it happened again, with a statement to the effect of you asked me to stop writing about you, too bad!, I called the mother and had a little chat. Never happened again. In this case, she actually used my daughter's name so I brought up the fact that it was libel. Print out the bulletin to show parents if you have to.
Friend
I would want to know if it were my daughter. It might get complicated when you first tell them and could cause problems but in the long run you may very well be saving her life. Please don't hesitate to tell the parents.
been where you are, my friend -
I am so sorry. I know this is hard, but here is an idea to try. Have your vet get you some Buprenex to administer at home. It is a very small amount of liquid you give via syringe inserted between her cheek and her teeth. You shoot it into the mouth. Takes less than a second and is painless. It is absorbed nearly instantly. It also causes far fewer side effects than most pain killers. This has worked like a charm when my cats had to have teeth pulled, for one that had all its teeth pulled due to severe stomatitis, and one who had oral cancer in his jaw. Try baby food (the meat types) and AD canned mixed with Pedialite to get food in her and keep her hydrated. You will know when it *is time* to let her go, but please give these things a try and let us know how it goes! My best to you.
Thank you - about my friend (sm)
She was a Christian and throughout her illness she asked for prayers for God's will to be done, not for her healing (although many of us still prayed for her healing). Many of the people posting on here blowing the horn about what great Christians are, are not acting the way true Christians should. I will admit to everyone that I am confused. I can't answer the questions about the suffering that goes on. I am not going to say that those people suffering just didn't have enough faith. The fact is you are not going to get what you want just because you pray for it. You might and you might not. I still believe, but many things in the world still don't make sense to me. I think somewhere along the way, we have gotten the message confused. I posted a link above about some little children who I think have it right.
A friend of a friend has had it done - sm
She did it about a year ago and has lost over 100 pounds but recently starting having severe problems. They ended up having to take them out as she was unable to eat at all basically; nauseous, constant vomiting, etc. She feels much better now though. Not sure of the details but that is the basic gist of it for her.
I'd be mad...no one else is her friend, so why should you be? (sm)
No reason for you to put up with her any more than anyone else does. She's just a snob - maybe if everyone ignores her for a while she will get the hint!
Friend?
Ever hear of a toxic relationship? Sometimes they are terribly hard to break, but you will be much better off if you cool it with her for a while, just see her when you absolutely have to.
I have a friend that did this went from Bob to Rob - sm
I just had a hard time switching to the new name as I had known him for years as "Bob". To him it was more an acknowledgement of his coming out as gay I think. I could care less that he was gay (and had known for a long time before he "came out") but he got mad that I would not call him Rob and so cut off all contact (we are on opposite coasts now, and then, so it is not a big deal either way). Upsetting to lose a friend over something so stoopid, we were both wrong I'd say, I should have tried harder and he should have cut me some slack as I had been a good friend for years. ---This guy's family you mention probably has the same problem, they know him as "Michael"; he should cut them some slack as that is what they are used to. My brother is named Mike, and we all call him Mike, my SIL is the only one who calls him Michael (he has never asked us to call him Michael though). I think he should just learn to live with it and use his new name with new friends and leave his family alone.
I have a friend like that too, SM
She does have a chronic medical condition, but is doing very well. She exercises with a personal trainer several days a week, takes long walks every day, and recently helped her stepdaughter remodel her home! However, she has a handicapped sticker (she brags about never having to walk very far in the winter) and not only that, is on SS disability. She hasn't worked in several years. Oh -- and if her DH or one of her teenagers runs errands, they take her van so they can get the close spots too. :(
And yeah, maybe I'm being judgemental too, but I agree with you 100%.
friend...
You know I guess some people are different but if someone pays $1000 for something I AM NOT asking to borrow it. I don't like borrowing other people's things. If I break it I feel it is my responsibility to replace it. So I just don't. Some people have no problem with it.
Friend
My good friend had a baby 8 days ago. Beautiful baby boy! Well her husband took off work 2 weeks to spend time with the baby. Her mother also lives with them and helps her too. Her mom also took off a week. Well I am friends with her mom also. We talk on the phone too. I thought I would not call and bother my friend until her husband went back to work. She won't talk on the phone if her husband is home. I know, don't ask. They don't want to take away from time with each other from what I understand. I personally do talk on the phone when my husband is home. Different strokes for different folks I guess. Anyway me and my friend always talked on the phone before the baby was born almost every day. Unless her husband was off work. Well since she has had the baby and her husband went back to work, she just has withdrawn herself. Doesn't want to talk to anyone. Made the comment to her mom that she doesn't want any company. Her mom called yesterday and I knew my friends husband was working so I told her mom tell her to call me later when she gets a chance. The baby sleeps alot so I figured she would. But she didn't. I guess I am just confused. I never went through that. I wanted to talk to friends. After a few days of recooperating I wanted friends to see my baby and all. But I don't understand her. I know every one is different and I just have to respect her wishes but I as well as another friend of hers is confused. I should also mention her baby was born with clubbed feet. She has really been upset about this and asked me in the hospital not to tell anyone. How can this be hidden when the baby will wear casts for a while? I am wondering does this sound like postpartum depression?
friend...
That is why I haven't went. I am respecting wishes. I did not say I was going to go by unannounced. I am honoring her wishes so therefore I am being a real friend. I considered sending a card though.
No, I only had a best friend
back when I was about 12 or 13. I open up to people and think I can trust them and just when I do they turn on me. I don't trust people anymore, been hurt to many times. I see this all the time where I hear ladies talking and hanging out shopping and having a nice time and wish I had that with a friend.
best friend
I have not had a best girlfriend since college. . My fiance is my best friend now. . I like the idea of having a best friend but I think I am not trusting enough. . My daughter has had a best friend since she was 13 - she is 23 now - and I really think they will continue their friendship - I hope so. . I think it is a good thing, just doesn't seem like it is going to happen for me.
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