How is them staying together better for the children?
Posted By: sm on 2006-11-12
In Reply to: Well, what does 'til death do us part' mean anymore then? If you take the oath, sm - Me
It would have been best for the children if these too goofs had used effective birth control and not brought innocent people into the mix, but since they did the best thing for those kids is to get K-Fed out of their lives as much as possible and hopefully Britney has the sense to hire a good nanny because she's no prize either.
I say mandatory sterilization is a great idea for these two clueless, selfish, immature, irresponsible people who had no business reproducing.
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Okay, I was staying out of this until now
Philly Gal, people like you make me sick. You are working for the same reason the rest of us are, to make a living, regardless of what the money is used for. I've worked with women like you my whole life who act like they're working just to give themselves something to do. Face it "Honey," you have bills like the rest of us and if you didn't work, your perfect little life would not be nearly as wonderful.
My SO is staying here a while
before moving in permanently. The last time he was here, he always left his cell phone around - which I never checked and did not even think to do so. I heard him talking a minute or two while I was in the shower today. Then he went out for a walk but returned a short time later because it was too hot - he loves the hot weather. I have noticed that he carries that cell phone around as though it is attached to him - takes it to the shower, etc. Am I being paranoid? Any input would be appreciated!!
Then WHY are you staying? NM
b
My secret is staying out of the sun
and wearing a hat or slathering on a crapload of sunscreen! I got totally fried when I worked for a nursery (plants) back in the early 1990's and my ears burnt so bad they they actually got a tad deformed around the edges! I love outdoors time but I'll be darned if the sun is gonna be the cause of my demise!
Besides, I'm a superfreak when it comes to medical stuff. I love researching all sorts of medical crap and that nasty IUD just stuck in my head from my days in Anatomy and Physiology 101.
I also have a fetish for bugs too and someday, before I die, I'd love to play entomologist or something queer like that.
But- she is still questiong about staying?
What is the question? He was an older guy trying to molest children- what question does she have? None that I can see.
What's your trick for staying awake? (sm)
I don't sleep well at night, even with taking a pill, and during the day lately I'm finding it harder and harder to say awake. I've had 2 caffeinated beverages but that's not helping. Smacking my face isn't helping. It's killing my line count. Right now I have a clothes pin on my earlobe causing just enough pain to keep me momentarily alert, but I don't expect this to last. Any suggestions?
How about staying overnight at somebody's house
or even in a hotel, and not being able to figure out the shower controls. I don't know why a shower fixture designer would be so mean as to hide basic controls, but one design that has stumped me turned out to be a little ring that appeared to be a nonmoving part of the faucet, that had to be pulled upward. If you couldn't find it, you couldn't get the water to go from the lower faucet up to the showerhead. Furthermore, all the control it gave you was on or off, instead of being able to control water pressure.
Sheez, why the secret? It's not as if it is even an attractive design!
Trouble staying awake - what do you do?? (nm)
x
...staying when there's NO love and no respect for YOU. nm
s
That was my thought, too. And have her eat well, staying away from junk
s
you did the right thing staying by the child...sm
and addressing the parent...I did worse than that...took the child, brought him to the front of the store and called out "lost parent alert"...Boy, that man was upset!
It's a shame that there were so many "nm" people out there replying to your post.  Cat
Sometimes staying is worse for the kids
I was in a similar situation for a long time. Our home became almost never peaceful due to their father's irrationality. It was an emotionally unsafe place for our 2 daughters. I'm not saying divorce is easy or always the answer, but in our case, we have had a friendly one, we are both still totally committed to co-parenting our children and everyone gets along so much better with him under another roof. My kids were 12 and 10 at the time (13 and 15 now), and we have been able to talk freely about all the issues and no one, not even my ex at this point, is happier than we ever were when we were living together. My daughters are above-average to excellent students in school, excel in music and sports and have the best relationship with both me and their dad that they have ever had. Sometimes you just got to look at a bigger picture about what is truly best for them, and then work at making sure their adjustment is paramount whether you decide to stay or decide to go. But having said that, be sure you do what is ultimately best for you too, I stayed as long as I did only because I let others try to tell me all the pat things, divorce is wrong, divorce is harmful to them, yadayadayada. Bottom line, if you are constantly unhappy, so will your kids be. Part of the reason my kids are so cool with the divorce is that they can now see me (and their father) happy. He has found a new partner, I haven't, but my happiness is not dependent on that. I go out some, but don't bring men around them to try to make a new daddy for them or anything like that. You have to decide what is right for you and for them, no matter really what anyone says. Once you have completely made that decision for yourself, you can make the rest fall into place. Best wishes to you!
I need help staying awake. I'm so sleepy. Any suggestions?
I go through spells like this where I just can't keep my eyes open and today is one of them. I find myself going to grab something to eat to help, but that really doesn't help with the weight any.
I desperately need to wake up. My workday is only half over. Any ideas?
Although I disagree with you staying, I admire your spirit :) nm
x
Dancing With the Stars. I wanted to see who else was staying, but they (SM)
kept fooling around and I would go from one channel to another watching something else, then back again. The commercials were over, and I dashed back into the room with the pan, sat down in my chair and without thinking laid the hot pan down beside me, realized what I had just done, but too late! They didn't even announce the next couple to stay then anyway! I watch the show from time to time, at least parts of it, but never got that into it, just wanted to know who would be eliminated last night. After the carpet deal I didn't care and still don't know!
Staying at home and sleeping it in. Have to be at work at
4:30 a.m. on New Year's Day. 
You know, it's kinda quiet on this side so would appreciate you staying with whatever
cat fight you might be in on the other pages.
Children having children not a new thing, where do you live?
My son, who is now in his early 40s, told me years ago when in high school about all the teenage mothers that were at his school and said they brought the babies to school, and he seemed to think it was like the girls having playdolls like when you were little. This is not new and apparently folks think alright to have their children sans marriage, be it preteens, teens or adults. I guess my years alone do not make me shocked at anything anymore. Others talk about this job being isolated and your post says some of this if you were shocked at what the son said.
they stated half was staying here in US/hafl to Africa (nm)
x
Yes!! I get extremely bored and have trouble staying focused on typing. sm
Some days I am so bored I dont know how I am going to get through the day!!
Getting there early and staying late, time spent on phoning
il
Staying at home and raising us kids worked for my mother
Hmm. It should be okay with me right? Oh, wait, that puts me in the welfare line which you think everyone takes advantage of.
You don't live in your mother's time. I wish you did, because the internet didn't exist then.
Oh Wow. Staying in downtown Atlanta in a historic hotel. This place is haunted. No one
told me this, I am a Christian and I feel this heavy spirit following me everywhere I go! How crazy is that? I believe there is something here at this place. It is a beautiful place, but definitely something spiritual going on here. This was the place where they had some Gone With The Wind ball many years ago. Very strange.
We are here visiting and going to the zoo, children's museum, and aqauarium this week. Wow. I have the chills right now! night night
Anyone have plans for the Superbowl? Staying home, going to friends, making food,
I should mention that I am 42, have 2 children and done with having children. nm
nm
You must a) not have children or b) your children are young
I don’t see them as being spoiled- I see lots of kids in the age group of one (30+) who are totally in the me scene, not just the 1 I have- she married and her husband same - a me type person. The other not spoiled but just got nasty when he did not get the money left to me and he thought he should. Just to think, this was my chosen 1 if I had to choose. Oh well, live and let live is the way I see things now.
she said *he definitely does not want more children*
but she said that HE definitely does not want anymore children...that's what the OP said so I responded based on that *fact*.... 
I am so sorry!! I have 4 children myself
30, 28, 24 and 17 - and can honestly say that we have gone through periods like this before - it is usally something really silly that gets all blown up - a misunderstanding, etc. Enjoy your birthday to its fullest - send a gift/card to your granddaughter as you normally would and go about your business with no bitterness - it will all work out - they will be back to you soon - really! :)
Yes, and then only if there are no children.
Sorry, but tobacco is a dastardly substance that people need protection from IMO.
Does she have children. If so, what are
xx
I have 2 children of my own,
starting with K. This is my sil who is having the baby and she has 3 children already and has run out of K names. So, I thought I would give her a hand. Thanks for your suggestions!! I am passing them on.
All children are different
it seems to me you keep comparing your 19-year-old to your 21-year-old. Since they are two separate people, they should be treated as such. Times are a changing. I'm sure it does worry you, but if she's off to college, she is probably staying out late there too.
both my children do just that and they are
both well-rounded, well-behaved, straight A students. Children have to live in this world and we as parents have to love and teach them. I know I am not the exception.
Whether having children or not is, without SM
question,your own choice, but you come across as very cynical. Perhaps you are watching too much TV or listening to talk radio. Things are not that bad. Oh sure, there is too much media attention given to Britney Spears, but most young girls, with the proper guidance, don't want to be her. There is a challange to motherhood, but most of us meet it very well.
Children & TV
How many hours a day/week do you let your children watch TV? Do they have TV's in their room? If so how do you monitor (or do you monitor) what they watch?
Have you ever banned certain shows from your house? What do you think about all those "sassy" shows on Nickelodean and Cartoon Network, like "Zach and Cody," or "Drake and Josh" or "Hannah Montana?"
I'm thinking of changing the TV rules and want to know what you all do with your kids.
Is this only to children that you know and
the parents know who the treat is from. We used to give out special home-made treats but always with a note saying who it was from. Now our neighborhood has grown so much we have a lot of children that don't live in the area. I don't want to give out something to someone and then their parents not let them eat it.
23 and 25 and like your children
my of my kids friends have older parents. All the kids like to hang out at our house because we "seem so much cooler" than their parents. Believe me, nothing goes on in this house that shouldn't. We just always have lots of junk food in the freezer, don't mind the music up loud, and love to just sit and chat with the kids. Last night one of my son's friends was picking him up to go to youth and she was early so we talked while he got ready. When it was time to go she said she didn't want to leave. It was really sweet.
Do you have children? LOL! sm
Meant that becasue I have a friend that says she has "brain damage cuz she has kids". I have a book that is titled "If questions for the soul". Not all questions are religious but most are. I had another one that was the same but not religious ? and loaned it to a friend. We often have these books in the car on family road trips. Really gets the family talking.
My children, now 26 and 25, are right there with yours. My
son works in retail (grocery store) and buys his jeans to wear to work at the thrift store. None of us mind wearing thrift store clothes. We tend to shop clearance racks and sales. They are not particular about the brand of clothing they wear (I never was either) so long as they fit and are comfortable. I'm really glad mine don't feel the need to compete with everybody else and spend everything they make trying to keep up with others.
Since I do not know you or your children, sm
I can not tell you the effects it will have on them--but, do not think for a minute they do not know about and cannot feel the stress and fear you are dealing with.
For me, it was best for me and my children to have a peaceful, happy home than to live one more day like we had been. This is a personal choice and for us, I made the right one. Good luck to you.
you know your children and how
they are prone to react (ie, 'you turned out okay'). I never lied to my kids, but only shared my experiences when I thought it would add to their education about a subject, and of course was age appropriate. For example, about drugs, they know what i think about pot/weed, but they don't know anything else i may have tried. Sometimes personal experience gives validity to the discussion, but i sure wouldn't make it a confessional.
You ask if she has children, will tell you what she has
She has a man who is likely bisexual but then sounds like a closeted gay to me, marrying for his own reasons, a person who is refusing her sexually, probably getting his kicks elsewhere (as in the gay sex line and possibly meeting other guys and having affairs on her.) I would not care if I had 20 kids, there is not that much "love" in the world for me to stay and hope to have a relationship? Not this woman. I do not want to risk my life. I heard the saying for years- where there's smoke, there's fire- so much smoke around this guy he could set his own bonfire.
I don't have children - but
Let me start by saying I do not have children (but do have neices and nephews). Second...my language itself is well lets just say I shocked my mom quite a few times. Bad language just happens to be part of our everyday conversation (IN THE HOUSE)- mostly as we scream at the TV watching the news about politics. :-) We don't talk like that outside and certainly not around children. I think its disgusting. Our neighbors across the street talk to their children exactly like what you wrote above. Except their words were "get your f'n a** in the house" and "you give me that sh*t again and I'll beat your a**" So they aren't swearing as if they were talking about other people, they are swearing at their kids. They are just a couple of pigs! Just sounds very very low class. My husband and I said if you talk to your children like that how are they going to be respectful as they grow (mind you we have no experience whatsoever raising kids, but we would never talk like that to our kids if we had any).
Yes I have children
Apparently you did not read my whole post.
Even little children need to feel they have some control over their lives ... like letting them pick between two different outfits for school, rather than telling them what they are wearing.
A safe and fair compromise is not a bad thing. The daughter will have to choose if she wants to cooperate or not. If she will not, there there is only so much you can do and she will have to experience the consequences.
Just because she has started handling her desire for independence in a not-so-great way does not mean she cannot do things differently after receiving more information and some thought. You have to allow teens the room to make smarter decisions along the way ... people DO learn and grow. That's the plan anyway. :)
I think I have to ban my mom from seeing my children (sm)
She lives 500 miles from us and sees them about twice a year usually, but every single time, she says inappropriate things around them. I end up asking her to please not tell them things like that and she gets angry at me and barely says anything for the rest of her visit. Yet the next time she sees them, it is the same thing all over again. It is as if she doesn't have a filter that tells her what to say and what not to say, and she talks incessantly. She talks about people who made her mad 30 years ago and what they did and she says it in a mean, angry voice and goes on and on. She talks about sexual things in front of them. She talks about ghosts and demons and how she has seen them and how the world is about to end, and on and on. Scaring them and also telling them things they shouldn't know. She started talking yesterday about my teenage nephew being propositioned by one of his friends who had decided he was gay....saying the boy asked him to "take his clothes off and do something". My 8 year old daughter started crying and told my mom it made her "feel weird" to hear that kind of stuff and to please not tell her anything else like that. My daughter knows what gay is but she doesn't understand why someone would want someone else to take their clothes off and she doesn't need to right now! Anyway, my mom went home last night but the kids are still asking once again about demons and ghosts and everything else. I love my mother but I am thinking from now on, I will go visit her by myself and not have her come here at all, and not let her see my kids until they are much older. Is this bad?
Boy men are such children - sm
my DH is a j*e*r*k like that too sometimes. He refuses to stay at my dad's house because he re-married so quickly after my mom died. (he wants to stay in hotel--which is very expensive where they live--....though we have not done it yet because as yet he has refused to go, so I go w/o him and the kids and I have lots of fun--he did go once 2 years ago though he made us stay at a friends apartment, very silly). There is more to it than that but that is a big part of it, and he thinks my stepmom's family thinks he is a loser. He is hung up on what people think about him and imagines slights, looks, etc. all the time, very hard to live with. But he know I will leave him in the dust and do what I want as he is acting like a 2-year-old. I would just go and not worry about him acting like a baby. If you stay home with him you will be mad, resent him for making you miss out spending time with your mom (which you will regret if something happened to her any time soon), and probably have a boring day at home while he watched football all day and you cook or twiddle your thumbs. He will probably never be the bigger person and bite his tongue and go, though he should. Men really are babies though at times.
Yea me and him have no children but
he does have a child of his own from a previous relationship. But his son does not like me and has nothing to do with me so I don't consider him of my child. He doesn't speak to me. I won't even get started on those issues.
I have 2 children. The first, a boy,
natural birth, lasted 12 hours, was very painful for me, at the end I was so weak - when I started out with my pregnancy I was underweight - that they had to inject me something that made my final contractions stronger.
The second, a girl, epidural. By far easier, but took also 12 hours. Most important is to get a gynecologist who has lots of experience with epidural deliveries. After the delivery I had in some trouble, I really felt bad until my system got rid of the anesthetic.
If I had to do it a 3rd time, I would definitely choose the epidural.
She would not get the children, not next of kin
even if put in will. I saw a picture of her and she looks strange herself, doesn’t she?
Happy Children
You don't know me or my children so you can't have any idea if they are happy or not.
And they are, very happy. They don't complain, they do what is needed and they have their activities, work, school, etc. They have great social lives and live life very fully, but with the expectation that things are done a certain way and if they aren't,there are reperucussions.
See my post above in a new thread, if you expect little, you get litte. It's that simple.
I don't have "kids" I have children
My children are goats, please don't call them "kids". Also, I never "whipped out a tit" as was posted earlier, I breast fed. My children weaned around 3 years old. The child on the plane was 22 months - just a bit shy of 3. Again, if you keep your face out of my breasts, you won't be able to see them.
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