Hey trose - I have A child...one...by choice...LOL
Posted By: sm on 2007-11-15
In Reply to: Do you have children? LOL! sm - trose
 Hi trose!
I knew I'd do GREAT with one and felt I'd be inundated with 2, especially since the husband was the 2nd child......in age and maturity...*lol*...I felt like I had TWO kids for 10 years.....I divorced him, got the kid, and she's TERRIFIC and close to both parents...
Came out nice and well adjusted, considering..........*ROFL* had I had a better marriage, I'd have had a gaggle of kids...*lol* But one quality child is better than 3-4 ones that can and might (will) run ya ragged. And mine is not all that spoiled, CERTAINLY NOT FINANCIALLY that's a given...*rofl* (on her own now for a long long time but around the corner...*whew*)
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It's not a choice, It's a child. NM
xx
Child-free by choice, age 50 now. sm
I knew when I was in my teens that I didn't particularly want kids but kept an open mind through my 30s because people said, "Oh you'll change your mind; your clock will be ticking", etc. I never had the urge to raise kids and don't particularly care for them.
Hubby and I have no regrets. Don't feel guilty. I think if you don't have a strong urge to have kids, you really shouldn't.
Good luck and enjoy your freedom.
Not by choice earlier in life, but now no kids by choice
When I was young we desperately wanted kids. We tried for years. (I never took birth control ever, and we even took fertility drugs and planned for multiple kids, just never worked out). Then went through a period of years where husband didn't want them but I did, then years where husband wanted them but I didn't, then about 15 years ago we both decided we didn't want them. We didn't even know what we wanted in life for ourselves and we figured if we couldn't figure out what we wanted why in the world would we bring kids into the world. Now I'm thankful we never did have kids and hope that we never do (I'm 52 with only one ovary - had ectopic pregnancy a few years back), but chances are I do not think we will ever have kids. Now I just cannot tolerate the kids. The little ones are very cute and we love hearing them play in our neighborhood. Some of the things they say are the funniest, but once they get to a certain age it seems like something in them transforms. When they lose the innocence of youth and start becoming little bullies talking back to their parents with their snotty attitudes we just always say, if he was my kid he'd never see the light of day again. Nothing drives me more insane to see the way some of these kids talk to their parents.
But now a days with all the bad going on in the country (around the world) and the country heading for disaster, and if the Mayan calendar is correct and in 2012 we see some major earth changes and the possibilities of civilizations being wiped out, who would want to put their kids through that.
So, I just say - I'm free of kids and loving it!
above msg for trose..nm
*
For Trose... (btw, this is my day off :)
If you want to know what you're going to be like in Heaven, what your Heavenly body is going to be like, it's going to be like you are now, only much more Heavenly, eternal, beautiful, wonderful, thrilling & glorious! (Phi.3:21)
When the Lord created the cycles of butterflies & moths, He was illustrating resurrection. They hatch from eggs into little worm-like caterpillars. Then they wrap themselves up in a cocoon called a chrysalis, almost like a coffin, & it SEEMS they die!
BUT THEN: Spring comes & suddenly the coffin splits open & out comes a beautiful butterfly or moth! Once it was just a little crawling worm, the most despised of all creatures, & all of a sudden it breaks out into a beautiful butterfly that flies in the heavens! -- One of the prettiest creatures!
Like the difference between the grain of wheat & the full-grown, full-blown stock & head that comes from one grain, or the flower that comes from one tiny seed, that's how much better your new Heavenly body is going to be!
It will be so much more wonderful, it will be like the difference between the seed & the flower! (1Cor.15:35-38, 42-58)
You're going to be like the Angels of God! (Lk.20:36)
I DO get that, trose...and thanks :)
thanks for what you said....it's better late than never...I had a huge problem with my mother for 10 years and then 9 years....a total of 19-20 years......but in that case, SHE lost out.....SHE missed the entire journey (and was physically there but not emotionally....very bad if you're like that...to have kids anyway). I'm fine today but took mucho years of therapy from like 8-28.....
And as a result of all that badness, I've been a better parent because of it...
out of every bad thing that happens to one in life, something good and positive comes out from that........
To trose
No....I was only thanking others for responses.....
to trose
yes, I think Obama actually addressed this saying people were sending out these e-mails and they weren't true -we have to be careful what we read on the internet - everything is not true and you kind of have to do your own research - on another note, I tried the pinapple cheese recipe you posted a few days ago - YUMMY!
LOL trose !
Trose, please do not take this
lightly. A few posters thought it was nothing to worry about. WHENEVER someone talksabout being unhappy and suicide....DO NOT TAKE IT LIGHTLY. Yes they may be trying for attention or doing one better than the other...you are doing the RIGHT THING..take him to a therapist or psychiatrist. He needs to express his feelings but unfortunately, not with his parents. Do not feel bad about that...it's hard to be honest with the folks as you know. Keep up with all that you have been doing and even if it turns out to be nothing - YOU ARE GREAT PARENTS....some kids just need attention and not from their parents. Hang in there...things will turn out!!! Good luck, hugs, and my thoughts are with you. You are doing the right thing - don't take this lightly...please.
trose....How's your son? Everything going well? nm
Should say the child found in Florida proved to be the Caylee child, homicide.
NM
Trose - Heaven
Trose, I love the creativity of this site.. go down the page for the beautiful animated graphic, and oh the words underneath are awesome.
http://www.angelfire.com/la2/OurAngel/Links.html
Trose I wouldn't let it go at that (sm)
I haven't chimed in until now, but I would go to the school and talk to the principal. My daughter is 7 and I can't even imagine someone doing that to her. Our kids are at the mercy of their teachers unless their parents stand up for them. They have no recourse against adults who treat them badly, unless we help them. It is not a matter of being overly sensitive. I wouldn't just hope that she gets reprimanded, I would see to it. I would request a meeting with her and the principal. I had to do this once when a teacher made my son clean feces off a bathroom wall - he reported it to her and she told him to clean it up. It wasn't his!! He would never have done something like that. So my son had to clean sh*t off a wall that wasn't his and be exposed to who knows what. I think it is good that you sent her an e-mail first, because that is documentation, which she knows, and that is why she did not respond to you in writing. You go mom! Keep your cool and remain calm but let them know it is unacceptable! I let too many things slide when my kids were even younger that I already regret. No more!
Trose -- I saw your post below
and just wondering how you are . . . hoping everything is okay. Please let us know when you can.
You sound like me, Trose
I'm 45 and my daughter is 14 and I've been taking her to concerts since she was 6. We just went to a Matchbox 20 concert and a few months ago we saw Daughtry. I think it's great when people don't necessarily act their age, within reason, of course. I think I also dress appropriately for my age. And yep, I wish I was the same weight 20 years ago. LOL. But whatever works for others is fine with me. My neighbor across the street is my age, but you'd never know it. She acts and dresses like she's 60, but she's still a friend. Long hair short hair, it doesn't matter as long as you like it.
(((((((((((hugs))))))))))) to you trose...sm
I'm so glad you took him in. That's a very scary situation, and I think you did the right thing having him talk to someone right away. I'm very proud of you...it must have been hard, even knowing that you had to.
About the eating disorder, keep an eye out for signs. I did want to say though that my hubby and all his buddies as well as my son and all his buddies say they're fat all the time. They rip on each other constantly too. They just walk up and say, *hey fat***, been going a little heavy on the cupcakes?* They all do it--no matter how skinny they are. My 12-year-old is 5 feet tall and weighs 90 pounds. Skinny as a rail, but he says all the time, *gotta feed the fat* or *fat guy in a little car*.
Now, I don't mean that you shouldn't take it seriously and watch for it (especially if his friends are concerned), but I thought you might like to hear that sometimes boys are just dumb. We (the wives) always say how mean they are and can you imagine if we did that? Oh, hey mt, (doing my best macho tone) still carrying the baby weight, huh? Can you imageine saying that to a friend?!? We'd all be in tears!
Please keep us updated, we'll be thinking about you.
One more thing--you might be able to take him into the dentist just for his check up. When they are making themselves throw up, one of the signs is the enamal on the inside of their teeth being damaged or gone.
Trose, I don't believe in heaven, but I would teach SM
heaven to small children, until they are older and can grasp death in the reality of truth. Hmm,did that make any sense? It's late.
Trose, I emailed you back...
This time with the right web address I hope. Let me know if the one I sent doesn't work...and I hope you enjoy the site!
Hi Trose - thanks for the great idea!
I think I'll start recording the games on the camcorder. That should keep me out of trouble. Then I can watch the game at home (alone) and yell all I want at the bad calls!!! Hahaha! Thanks.
Trose: Update on swimming class
Funny you should bring this up again. I sent the gym teacher an email the night of the 19th and she never responded until today, AFTER I sent her another email with a copy to the district office asking her why she had not responded.
She basically said that she didn't realize that her direct questioning and her "simple suggestion" was "too direct for someone who was apparently over-sensitive."
Offered no apology, nothing. Her reply was not copied to the district office so I replied to her with a copy to the district office so her response went to them also.
Since this incident last Wednesday, I have learned that this is certainly not an isolated incident but the kids were basically too scared to say anything about it. They feared that if they complained, she would fail them and has apparently threatened to do so.
Basically, it is still unresolved. My daughter is back to swimming today so we will see if there are any further comments tonight when she gets home.
I hope the teacher is at least reprimanded by the school district and maybe given some training on how to handle delicate situations with young girls going through the beginnings of puberty.
Here it is, trose - Khalil Gibran on Love
On Love
When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep,
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.
For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you.
Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.
Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.
He threshes you to make you naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant;
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire,
that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast.
All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart,
and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life's heart.
But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing floor,
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.
When you love you should not say,
'God is in my heart,' but rather,
'I am in the heart of God.'
And think not you can direct the course of love,
for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night,
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.
http://www.maryourmother.net/Gibran.html
Look trose, there are limits to how weird the things can be!! LOL (nm)
x
Thank you Trose, so do I believe it will make a huge difference, NM
z
Trose - would love to hear what happened at your SS class.
nm
Hey trose, I've had many yard sales over the years and have
seem some pretty surprising stuff go on, only to watch people battle off and jump in their "fancy" cars. I've had people set a whole pile of stuff in front of me and throw a 5 at me and try to take off knowing that what they had cost more. I had one lady say "quarter?" over and over and over trying to buy two folding lawn chairs and I kept saying, "NO." She finally gave up and left. I've had people steal right out from under my nose and jump in their "fancy" cars and take off. I've had a whole "family" of Mexicans pile out of a very nice van and converge upon my yard sale with one person trying to keep my attention while their family members steal whatever they could from me. When I saw a one of the kids stick an X-Box game in his shirt, I told him he had to pay for it and he tried to walk away. When my husband came up on the boy, the father tried to start a fight with my husband. My neighbor called the police and when they arrived they had the adults and teens in cuffs and the children in the back of a unit. Turned out they were illegal and were arrested and hauled off and then a tow truck came and got the van.
I haven't had a yard sale in a long, long time.
DH's choice
This is the dog my DH says we can have! He is 5 years old. He has been a show dog, but he finds it too boring, so we get to adopt him .... if Sasha approves of him. Do you think he's pretty?
http://www.synama-wintersweet.com/trey.asp
I am told this is an excellent line for show Siberians. You can tell who the champions are (to see their other dogs, click "Our Siberians" tab at the top) by the CH before their names. 
don't have a choice....
have to get the kids off to school, but most of the time still in my pjs
My choice . . .
Denzel Washington, Paul Newman, Robert Redford.
Again, you do not know whether they had a choice
or not. This is simply your opinion that they did not have a choice. Yes, teenage girls, or boys, for that matter, can be married with the consent of their parents. Again, we do not know the facts in this case. You have even gone as far as saying the men are "old and stinky." How exactly do you know this? You do not... That is simply your opinion. I have lived in St. George, Utah, which is very close to an area where these people live, and I have seen many young (20s-30s), what I would consider attractive men, married to these women. It is best not to stereotype people, especially when all of the facts are not available.
It is not your choice...
As I stated above, it really is NOT your choice! She could REQUEST leave, or a reassignment, but nothing is saying that it will be approved! Especially in the Marines! There aren't always, "ways to get around that."
choice-
gay is a choice sort of like being male or female is a choice, sort of like having brown eyes is a choice, sort of like being tall is a choice. Whatever. One does not choose to be gay nor does one decide to be gay.
Of course I do! I'm an MT- I have no choice!
If I want new clothes, you can't beat Walmnart's prices, plus they usually have some of the cutest clothes.
The rest of the time, I go to Goodwill and Thrift Stores. Just found great new one in the East Bay Area (CA) called Thrift Town, and got a perfect-fitting pair of Levi's for $3.50, and two lightweight hoodie workout-type jackets for $1.00 each. Can't beat that!
yes to both..but by choice, not by force.sm
some docs get caught up on their dictations while on holiday. I am alone and have nothing better to do anyway, so why not make some extra cash. but that's just me. good luck in your search.
ok-it's about choice-don't be intimate....sm
don't forget in the USA (outside of Alaska) there are 10 women for each man.......40 years ago it was 8 men for each women but we know how those numbers changed.....15 minutes out of 24 hours or 2x's a week being intimate for an hour in a 168-hour week - is too much to ask for? *curious*
Sounds like they don't have a choice, it's where YOU want them to be.
x
Being overweight sure is a choice, just like sm
smoking cigarettes or doing drugs is a choice. If you are making the right food choices, exercising, drinking water, or even following a Weight Watcher's plan, you will lose weight, unless you have a problem with one of your organs where you retain "water weight". I, quite frankly, am tired of people sitting around asking "how do I lose weight" when they are not making good food choices and not staying active? If you have trouble with arthritis, then you can do aqua therapy (get in a pool even if it is heated). Anything that gets your heart rate up is exercise. The "government" is not at the grocery store holding your hand or at that fast food restaurant making you buy those burgers. I'm sorry, but that is JMO. 
That is a great choice.....by the way,
lots of people talking about her and I wondered if anyone else noticed her wrist is constantly bandaged or sometimes has loads of bracelets. I can make a good guess on that but will not state here. Just a thought.
We do have a choice. We can choose to keep our
undies on and not engage in sex or we can choose some form of birth control (albeit it fails from time to time).
That was her choice, not mine
it was her first marriage and she paid for it. I paid for the rehearsal dinner. She is the kind that does not want outside assistance, not from me and so I never BUTT in. It is probably nice for daughters who want their mother involved, mine happens to just want to be the 1 who does it by herself. Very independent and always like that. She never asked me to pay for anything - I volunteered for the dinner.
Unfortunate choice by...
...his parents for a name, but he was born before Pol Pot came to power, which isn't even a true name, but the shortened version of Politique Potentielle. Maybe the similarity in names was part of the blame for the bullying Paul Potts endured while growing up.
Nevertheless, I didn't even think of the mass murderer when hearing this man's name. Maybe because I read the name before hearing it.
I thought with all the discord on some of the other threads, the unhappiness with jobs, offshore issues, and not to mention the garbage we all hear on the news every day, that this man's story would be a welcome change. It isn't often we hear of the good stuff that happens or the inspirational moments in people's lives. I wish I had left out his name in the original title of the thread!
A 14 -15 y.o. CANNOT make that choice and for a
fc
They have a choice to find another job, yes? nm
.
They usually have to discuss their choice with
xx
Your drink of choice?
Tonight I will be having club soda, cranberry juice and vodka with a twist of lime. Maybe two.....
I have a liquor cabinet filled, so what can I get ya?
hard choice
The choice to rent or buy is tough. I was a single mom up until a year ago. I had bought a home; however, I think I would have been better renting. When you buy, there is a lot to take care of on your own. It's hard with the unexpected things that come up. Then again, if you rent, a landlord could be tougher for a woman to deal with to get them to take care of things. In this economy, buying is scary, too.
I think it is her body, her choice, and
her business. In the same category with men donating sperm or couples going to a fertility clinic.
first trimester that is.
lol yeah, that was my first choice.
the store I went to last night didn't have them, so had to go out today, so too late for the crock pot. Thank you anyhow :-)
Childfree by choice?
Just wondering how many of you out there have made the decision to NEVER have kids. I'm 25, and have known for a long time that I never wanted kids. As time goes on, and I meet new co-workers with kids (and hear how unhappy a lot of them seem to be deep down), I feel even more relieved that I'm never having any.
One big reason why I know having kids isn't for me is because I have Asperger's Syndrome. Not only is it hard enough to just get through day to day life and take care of myself, but I simply wouldn't be able to handle the stress of parenting- I know my limits. Also, according to my Dr. (who is one of the most familiar with Asperger's in Baltimore), there would be a high likelihood of my child having a disorder somewhere along the autism spectrum. I know I couldn't handle a well-bahaved child (I just don't like being around kids in general), let alone raise a child with special needs.
Given that I have AS, I'm thankful that I have well above-average intelligence to at least partly compensate for other eccentricities. And I'm also fortunate enough to have a good, well paying, stable gov't job, where even if I'm not Mr. Popularity, I am still known to do a really good job (and on the bright side, even if I pi*s people off-which I have, it's not like they can fire me). So...since day to day living and working is hard enough for me, I want to have some time to have fun, and if I had kids I simply wouldn't have the capacity to raise them properly and have time to do things that are important to me.
The colors would not be my first choice, but...
I would move into it in a hot New York minute. It beats the baby-puke green house at the end of my cul-de-sac. I think it looks kind of funky and here where I live funky is a good thing. Of course it depends on what part of town you live in too. LOL.
No, unless of course the foster kids of choice
include the more difficult ones because a lot more money is paid monthly for them. I knew of a couple who took in only the more difficult kids, a bunch at a time and made a killing off these kids, now well off and retired and enjoying live and want nothing to do with any of them. Never did really. Sad.
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