Hanging out at your house is a good thing
Posted By: Llls on 2008-11-26
In Reply to: Question Re: Teenagers - Frazzledmom
as long as you are there. My house became the hang out house, and it was hard, especially when I was trying to get my work done. But I knew where they were and could step in and keep things under control when necessary. I don't have any daughters, and from what I can tell, it seems that I got the easier job in raising boys rather than girls. I had a "rule of 16" which meant my sons could not date until they were 16 years old. Boys don't really seem to fight this so much. My oldest didn't have a steady girlfriend until he was 18. My youngest was 17 when he first started dating. I also had problems with some of their friends being just plain rude. They'd swear, never say please or thank you, and just generally act like snotty brats at times. That wasn't a problem for me. I corrected them and taught them manners. I used humor, which again boys seem to respond to. Usually, when we had girls over who acted that way, the boys were quick to correct them, and I didn't have to step in myself.
As far as going out, my boys did go out to hang at the local pizza parlor in mixed groups when they were 13. I never had a problem, but they were held to time limits.
I think it's nice that the boys are having lunch at your house with your daughter. It costs a little more to feed your daughter's friends, but you have them there in the house. Be friendly and relaxed, but insist on polite behavior in your home. Surprisingly, most kids will actually gravitate to the house with that sort of atmosphere. Your daughter may give you some grief about not being allowed to do what everyone else is doing, but that's ok. Your job isn't to have her agree with all of your decisions. Your job is to do what is best for her. I think having the boys over while you are at home was a very good compromise. If it happens again, you can always say, "You know, I'm pretty hungry, too. How 'bout I have some pizza delivered. I can order extra and you can invite some other friends over, too." Good luck!
Complete Discussion Below:  marks the location of current message within thread
The messages you are viewing
are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select
the boards given in left menu
Other related messages found in our database
Hanging around your house (as long as
you are home) I do not see as a problem. My daughter is 14 and really the only place I let her go with a gruop is on church outings where I know they are supervised. She does have a male friend that hangs out here (same age) at times, but I am always around.
As for hanging out at a pizza place, there are probably older kids there and I would be a little leery of that.
Same thing in my house
We just have to look at the good side of this. At least we know who our kids are hanging out with and what they are doing. They have even got me hooked on Dance Dance Revolution. Sigh, maybe I will lose some weight.
I need to do the same thing, my house is - sm
a wreak. Granted a lot of it is clutter which does not help the situation. I went as far as to try to start, first step was a clean kitchen sink for a few days, that is as far as I got, and sad to say I did not keep up. Maybe I will try again, would love to have a cleaner house than presently. It is not a sty but certainly can use some work.
Another thing about the house I sold,
I had moved, rented it out and like I said above, got an interest only loan on it, had borrowed some money and that loan looked really good until the payment started creeping up and up and up and I was sweating it trying to unload (after I decided not to rent anymore) that I probably would have taken less. I am really, really glad I sold when I did. I could have had new house, old house note with the old house steadily climbing and been in as bad shape as some I read about in foreclosure.
My sis says buy the smallest house in a good neighborhood. n/m
.
Am glad someone is good with around the house projects
I can, hmmmm, transcribe? After that, pretty much downhill but I am really spoiled by him and only wish I had just a 4th of his talents. We are some lucky women!
I would never say it was a good thing...
but I can't believe how much attention this whole thing is getting. The poor woman's life was a train wreck, which, unfortunately, is what made her famous. But at least this has overshadowed the whole astronaut in a diaper story.
not, it's not a bit much; it's a good thing...
nm
Good - that's the right thing.
These guys need to be reported before they potentially hurt someone else. At least mall security will be on the lookout for them. You may have well saved someone else's life, too. I think that was God's plan for you. The angels he sent into your life are the ones you will help save.
God bless you for doing the right thing.
good thing u were there!
Thats awesome that you saved him! good thing you were right there, its like instinct kicked in.
good thing u were there!
Thats awesome that you saved him! good thing you were right there, its like instinct kicked in.
It is good news......but the only thing is
from what I have heard he is still getting paid (or already has been paid) for doing the book. I only hope that the families can collect what they won in the civil suits from what he is being paid.
Good points, and that is the thing. It is not
a fix-all. Without making lifestyle changes, everyone will regain their weight back. My step-mom had the surgery and is over the 100-pound mark for the weight she has lost. She has cut out all breads from her diet, desserts, etc. She has made huge diet changes since, and that is why she is losing the weight and keeping it off. She also consumes a lot of protein. She has done fantastic with it though. My friend's sister had it and is having a lot of complications, but she has not followed the recommendations for after surgery either. Her son had it and has done great and is keeping the weight off.
Good. and weight is not the only thing--sm
that causes the conditions mentioned. I have a big kitty too, and he really does not eat that much, but a mixture of one small 4 oz can of wet and perhaps about 1/2 c of dry per day. he is just a big cat, weighing 14 pounds at last visit. He is very timid and does not do much for play or exercise. Sometimes kitties are just big, like humans, and it is not always diet that makes them that way. I, too, would be very apprehensive in changing pet food right now. I love my kitties too and so far, am thankful that their food has not been one that has been recalled. Changing vets is easier than changing doctors, but if you are not happy, then move on. Personally, if one tried to give an attitude of forcefulness with me, vet or doctor, I would be gone in a heart beat. You may find a much nicer one down the road. Give your kitty a pet and mommy knows best. lol.
good one. I was thinking the same thing! sm
I would either put up with it or try exercise before I would resort to any type of surgical procedure for vanity sake. I have seen on TV programs concerning this, just how the doctors treat their patients when they are under anesthesia. NO THANKS!
Employers ought to know a good thing when they have one
I have poured over Craigslist today and the spelling is something else. I had several days to go through as I have been on holiday. What is happening with the English now? This is what I found: Bambu table, bronz bed, bump beds (can you believe that?), sley bed, camping cott, talbe (that was spelled 4 times that way in the description), marlbe table, Asain (that, too, was spelled that way several times in the description), bed ajusts to queen, mohogoney desk, matress and I think this was the best yet - sowing machine (sewing). Unbelievable but these were actual spellings. Bless their hearts!
Decided the same thing at age 40 - good for you!
Of course, people did not like the abrupt change I made and it made many angry, but you know what? I do not care. I am a good wife, daughter, sister, and friend, but I refuse to be a doormat to anyone. Life is too short!
Well then I guess it is a good thing that ...sm
close minded people like you don't run our country then. Go do some research before you make comments. A pit bull is a dog like any other. They are steretyped as being vicious because some people fight them. I do not agree with fighting any breed of dog including pit bulls. Those fighting pits are TRAINED to do that. They are not born that way. Some won't even fight after being trained to. I used to have a Yorkie that was a little fellow but he was 10 times meaner than my pit. Actually I will tell you how nice the pit was. With his size he could have easily killed the yorkie. Well the yorkie was constantly growling and biting the pit and one day just reached up and bit him square on the balls. The pit turned around and just looked at him. He could have torn the little fellow apart but he didn't. Now would a unstable mean dog be that calm? You need to rethink your comments. You are way off the mark.
Good luck to you. I think you are doing the right thing. NM
x
Nope, but probably would be a good thing!
Just kidding but I love my dentist- he is so funny he makes me laugh all the time while I am having a root canal done! I love his office help also. I only wish I could find a PCP that I really enjoyed as much then all would be good in my world. I do not dread going to the dentist like I once did. He is a trip!!
Started being alone at an early age, good thing now with this job but
probably my favorite thing was going over to a small creek to catch frogs, tadpoles (tried to grow those to make frogs), caught salamanders, found dead snake and put it in alcohol in a jar, caught beetles and gave them as a present for my mother (she came in from work to discover all her lipsticks out on the counter and when she opened her little box, there was my present). She like to have killed me on that one! I loved to catch June bugs and fly them around. I have wonderful, wonderful memories of these things and sorta found lots to do just with me and me alone- good thing I did now with the work I do, right? I could still hibernate in my home for a week and not be bothered at all- love my own company.
Definitely not a good thing to use that tape, in my opinion. But! sm
You can do a lot of other fun things! I hung a few witches, a scarecrow, a black cat, pumpkins on the brick outside and will go and get hay, etc. in a few days to decorate with.
Green in the wallet is a good thing
I don't like the color green at all so I have no green clothes whatsoever.
I know one thing - a BLUE screen is NOT good
nm
You make it sound like it's a good thing --
Are you just being sarcastic? I hope so. I love kids, but seriously, this country can't afford to have women having more children than they can afford. Look at the mess we're in now with welfare, not to mention the abuse and neglect these children suffer. I live in a very rural, low income area. I have seen so many children whose parents don't care for them, yet they continue to "pop out" more babies to get more welfare benefits.
If this becomes a new trend, the govt will end up removing the welfare caps in order to support these children. I know it's not the children's fault, but it isn't my fault either. I'm tired of paying for the welfare system as it is.
I'm hanging
Getting a little drowsy though. If I gets too bad, will have to let my supervisor know I'm going down for a nap.
I can't believe the poor poster above only got Advil. I was taking Advil like candy over the weekend and it got to the point that it wasn't doing anything.
hanging out with other
Over the course of a long marriage socializing with other couples comes and goes depending on how much spare time you have to socialize.
If you are with someone who really does not like to socialize "at this moment" I would suggest a night on the town just the two of you. Then you get to go out, and he gets to reconnect with you and you may find him more interesting if you are not distracted by the other people and just have fun together.
Oh, good one! I despise that store! And the funny thing is..
most kids around here who want to be noticed, or whose parents have a ton of money or who are just plain brats ALL wear A&F. My kids could really care less. Talk about the store that caters to cliques and that is IT. But it caters to them in such a bad way......PS: Good for your friends and your daughter!
Also, I wish people, parents especially, that you don't have to wear a particular brand name to be noticed or to be cool. That is just so ridiculous to me! Why do people do it? Now, I will buy clothes from expensive stores IF the quality is what I am looking for, so I'm no K-Mart mom by all means, but I think these days parents are taking this "look at the brand-name-my-kids-are-wearing" way too far!
Tough love can be a good thing - I agree w/you
You did the right thing. He needs to learn otherwise you are going to have a yo-yo on your hands.
I wish I had stuck to my guns the first time my son did that. It took me a few years to learn. Moving away from home is NOT something small. It is a BIG thing and you son needs to realize that. I WISH I had listened to someone besides my mothers advice and maybe my son would be better off.
IMHO--- People should get real - You took YOUR key back You did NOT kick him out you were giving him what he wanted. You did NOT put him out into the streets.
Stick to your guns mom and I think that one day he will be a better man for it.
Repeat after me ... Crate training is a GOOD thing!
Invest in a good crate and use it.
The crate will cost you less than the destruction in the long run. It takes a while for the dogs to get use to it but once they are they are much happier for it.
My Rotts each have their own crates and when we have company or if they just want their own space they will go to their crate and chew on their KONG or a pigear.
Whenever I am going to be gone for any length of time I put up my Rotts and when people come to visit and ESPECIALLY when I have other folks children in my house. Mine dont see it as punishment at all and have gotten to where at night they sleep in their crates with the doors open. Although I do have to say they prefer to have Animal planet showing on their TV in their room when I am gone for any length of time.
Good Luck!!!
Thanks. I figure the one good thing is that their lab is inhouse so won't have to wait
for another company bogged down with labs from 10 other facilities.
ok sk8girl, the window is wonderful and a really good thing
for your eyes. If you focus near and then you can focus out a window, you will save your eyes and type for about 20 more years than you would without a window. I lost my window and my eyes followed close behind. I love that you all have the same stacks of books I do, same bowl of almost food, required coffee mug and the fact that it looks like we all spend our lives right in that chair. ha ha.
ROFL, that was good, Robin, I was thinking the same thing but.....sm
you have articulated it so much more colorfully than I ever could,what a hoot, even though it is such a sickening story. Man, did this woman EVER have any self-respect, self-esteem, to say nothing of self-discipline and brains? Total sociopath, puts the "ICK!" in SICK!!
You can also try hanging a bell...sm
On the doorknob of the door you let the dog out of if you don't want them to scratch the door. Then teach them to lift their paw to hit the bell as a way of them letting you know they need out (or they can touch it with their nose to make the noise if you'd rather they do that).
Just lift their paw up and do it for them at first, praising them and/or giving a tiny treat each time, then open the door and go out, and pretty soon they'll figure it out.
One of our dogs figured it out a little too well, and he was soon hitting the bell again and again, very loudly and impatiently every time he just wanted out just to play, so we didn't leave the bell up for long after he was housebroken! LOL
I also agree with the crate training advice you were given. Crates are wonderful tools as long as they're used responsibly. A crate for a dog is sort of like a crib for a baby, IMO.
You also might want to consider something called "clicker training." I'm not an expert on it, but I've done a litte bit and it's fun. (You can use it to train your cats too, BTW!)
Here's a really good article I found for you on housebreaking. It's for puppies and older dogs:
http://www.clickerlessons.com/housetraining.htm
Best of luck with the training. Enjoy your new addition to the family, and please give updates! 
Well don't leave us hanging - let's have it!!! nm
I'm glad she seems to be hanging in there.
I'm sure she was relieved to see you and it did bring her comfort. Maybe she will get used to the tech if she'll just stop poking her, poor baby.
Agree with hanging it outside....
My daughter works in a restaurant that is full of smokers and when she comes home, her coat smells like a french fry rolled in an ashtray - and she always hangs her coat right next to mine. Don't think so - it goes right outside overnight and by morning, the smell is almost gone.
I also LOVE to hang my sheets out when there is a chill in the air. They always smell so much better than when I hang them out in the summer. Have no idea why, but they do.
I sort of understand the question, but is it supposed to be a *good* thing????
Cause middle class sucks, these days. lol
I'm not working either; it's a good thing, since my thumb feels like it will soon fall off - n
:)
So, what happened ~ don't leave me hanging!
I think Logan was going to ask Loralei if he could marry Rory, but I'm more interested in what is going to happen with Luke and Loralei, even though he was such a jerk last season.
well I have the feeders hanging in a tree
but now that the leaves are gone, he has full view and can take his pick. He must realy like the finches, because he has been picking them off my finch sock and practically taking the sock and all (must get his toenails caught). I feel bad, because I feel I'm luring the birds out to the feeders and then they're actually becoming a meal themselves. Maybe I will look into planting some holly bushes or something thick that stays all winter and he can't get into. May not look too pretty in my front yard though. I don't know what else to do.
I totally agree and I am hanging onto
my 95 truck which has too much new stuff, too, but it is paid for. This stuff worked just fine before. wonder where you are? my sister is a pilot, but I think your husband is safe, she has a mechanic already!
And your point is what? I've been hanging out SM
with Sarah Palin and she has all kinds of tips. I hear moose if pretty plentiful and one or two should last you through the season. You might have to charter your own private plane, though.
Happy hunting!
Might try hanging garlic cloves from the branches, - sm
but then again, it might just keep the people away, too!
(On the bright side, at least your tree would be free of vampires.)
Yes more of a stomach bug. Just keeps hanging on. Pains and cramps and just not feeling well. nm
:
You can grow tomato plants upside down from hanging pots, too.
s
Need help with ideas for remodeling house and decorating. We bought a house
in fair condition about 10 years ago, got into some medical problems, and have just now paid off the mortgage. Hubby and I agreed we would do nothing to the house for remodeling because we wanted to pay it off first, then the medical bills. I need to know of some websites/magazines/books to start researching for how to go about this. These will be major repairs - roof, septic, basement, windows, pretty much everything except wiring. Where do we start? Maybe hire a general contractor just to do an evaluation and give us recommendations? Hubby is a handyman but cant seem to get a handle on where to begin. We would like to do as much of the work ourselves as possible - labor of love and all that...
Thanks for any and all kind suggestions!
Happiness is a heart thing; pleasure is a head thing.nm
Anyone have any good holiday dessert recipes? Looking for something good to take to a party. nm
x
What a good role model you are for good holiday spirit...wow nm
Awesome! Good service is good news.
nm
|
