Hang in there girlfriend. If you feel the trust
Posted By: trose on 2008-02-09
In Reply to: just an update.....sm - Update to help me please posted in December
is there, then believe in it. Truely hope it works out for you. I have seen amazing turn-arounds in marriages. It can work.
Complete Discussion Below:  marks the location of current message within thread
- just an update.....sm - Update to help me please posted in December
- Hang in there girlfriend. If you feel the trust - trose
The messages you are viewing
are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select
the boards given in left menu
Other related messages found in our database
The one where the guy's girlfriend is in his best
Too funny. Always cracks me up. Secret Luuuuverrrr.... (kam)
You go girlfriend!! nm
nm
Or Chandler's ex-girlfriend! GAG! Definitely a new gig
s
My son and his girlfriend got their Chihuahua sm
that way. Her cousin moved to California and she asked her to keep Chewy and another cousin to keep Lea. Well, Chewy was apparently the more difficult poochie of the two with absolutely no discipline in the past and probably a little abuse as well since he was hand shy, but now is just the most lovable little stinker around. Let me tell you, he could show his teeth and growl and was not afraid of anything. I had no doubt at all he could and would bite. All he needed was just a little discipline and now he is great. Well, the cousin called Saturday and she said she was pregnant and could only take one dog back and she really didn't want Chewy so now he is a member of my son's house. He's quite comfortable here with my dogs too and his post is in front of the full view door where he can stretch in the sun and look outside. Begs like the big boys too! 
Nip Tuck - CT's girlfriend
Feel free to email me. I'm a huge fan. Love, love, love the show and especially Julian McMahon. Pretty graphic but great stories. I'm sure you'll love the first two seasons. I just started watching last year, but I've been watching a lot of the first two seasons on You Tube and a few other sites.
Our local target had the first three seasons for $14.99 so I got myself an early Christmas present.
Your father might have a girlfriend but
he is a lonely man and probably missing your mother and his family. Annoyed? That would all have to do with how much I loved my father, I guess.
Your dad having a girlfriend means nothing really
Your dad is in love with your mom. I don't know who initiated the divorce, but it seems very obvious your dad is still in love with your mom. Having a girlfriend is just to keep him from feeling so alone, but she obviously doesn't fill that void he has, which is his family and wanting that life he had. YOU are his family, you and your mom were the life he had; divorce doesn't make those feelings go away. I'm sure he does come by to see what your mom is doing or if she is at home but no doubt he just misses that closeness with you as well.
He wants to still know he has a family..... his girlfriend certainly isn't filling that void.
Ex's new girlfriend calling my home
My ex-husband has a new girlfriend. She was introduced to my kids a few months ago, and they have only met her twice.
Yesterday was my son's birthday, and she called my home to wish him a happy birthday. This is, by the way, the 4th girlfriend he has introduced to the kids in the last 2 years. She doesn't even live in the same state as my ex.
Also, not one single member of ex's family acknowledged my son's birthday in any way, and my ex was only concerned about my son talking with his new girlfriend.
Am I wrong to be upset about this? I don't really care if he introduces people to the kids on his own time with them, but I feel like his girlfriends should not be calling MY home. I also feel like he should be encouraging people that my son actually knows and loves (like my ex's parents) to call him on his birthday.
Am I wrong to be upset about this or should I just keep my mouth shut about it? I feel like my personal space has been entered, and I really want to call her and tell her not to call my home.
What do you think?
Why doesn't he break up with his girlfriend?
??
I wonder that as well. Recently gave my son's ex-girlfriend
a very expensive baby gift for her new little one (b/4 she was even born). I mean it cost several hundred dollars. Never heard a word, not even a phone call. Then she sent me an invite to her wedding soon after...i respectfully declined. Guess she had a stamp for that, but not for a thank you note.
My girlfriend went to school here in Atlanta
with Gladys Knight at Archer High.
This reminds me of a girlfriend of mine
who had some young age, gained some weight and really dressed always like her granny. One day picking the kids up from school someone remarked about why cute grandchildren she had! People without thinking can say some pretty stinging remarks sometimes, such as asking overweight lady when is she due!! I always when seeing a pretty baby go for the generic so I don't guess wrong and say pretty girl when it's a boy, just say what a cute little baby. The parent usually tells me girl or male or at least gives me a hint so I will know.
girlfriend named Shirley. What's not to like?
x
Darn nice guy! Unless it was his girlfriend, then a jerk:) Good for you! nm
,,
bull, he was not too drunk he has a girlfriend. See the writing on the wall. nm
,
Me too hang in. sm
I have terrible anxiety too. Being an MT, I am sure you know that anxiety/depression go hand in hand. Here is how it goes with me: I worry myself into an exhausted state of depression, one in which I could sleep around the clock. I am on Zoloft. I don't like being on medication either, but it is better than what I call going into darkness. I will be starting yoga very soon, as I think that will help me.
It took awhile to find the right med for me. Good luck to you.
Hang in there!
Hey, you just need to hang in there. I've been thinking a lot about you today and the whole situation. The fact is, you'll never know what he is doing 24/7. Like I said before, you just have to hope that his upbringing is deep rooted in there somewhere and he'll have the sense to know right from wrong. He will make mistakes in his life journey and you have to let him make those mistakes so he can grow as a person. I'd still take the car away. That is how he will learn the consequences of what he has done and when you do give the car back, he'll be more appreciative of having it. If he was paying for the car himself it would be a different story, as one writer posted. I'd just hate to see him lose his scholarship. I mean, how many people get that opportunity. My son went to the army to get money for college because we could not do it ourselves financially and he did not want to have a bunch of school loans to pay back when he was done. But to get a scholarship like that is just such a gift, I hope he doesn't blow it. Maybe mention that to him, how hard it would be financially if he had not received the scholarship. A lot of kids don't get to go to college because of the cost and are stuck in dead-end jobs. It'll all work itself out, don't worry.
Hang in there!
How about just taking 1 day off as a "me" day. That would not dent the 40 hours much. You would be surprised how a day of rest and away from the computer and transcribing would free your spirit. Do whatever your heart desires. Or do nothing. A therapist once told me that if you don't fill yourself up from time to time, you will become all worn out. Filling up means doing something just for you. So do that something just for you. And if you get too worried about taking the PTO just call in sick and make the lines up later. But don't stress. You'd be surprised how 1 day off now will make a difference for the rest of this stressful holiday month.
Good luck. There are many of us like you who understand. We are worn out too!
just hang up
:)))
Hang on to it!! LOL! NM
xx
and you can also hang one
ol-timey style over an open fire (or in a fireplace)or on a wood (box) stove. We also have one of those double-sided screen things that you can put steaks (any meat/veg) in and cook over fire.
Why don't you just hang out with
your older sister that you enjoy being with? Simple as that. Nobody is forcing you to feed your sister's cats. You probably just want to get along with everybody which isn't always possible. Just don't answer The Witches of Eastwick's phone calls or have contact with them. You sound like a very nice person but maybe too nice to your sisters and they take advantage of you. Remember, nice guys finish last and start getting a little tougher. Don't feel guilty if you chose not to have contact with your sisters. It sounds like you worry too much about what your sisters think of you. Go a week without talking to them and see if your self-esteem improves. Your sisters sound very toxic.
Good-luck and let us all know how you are doing.
Hang in there...
Just as an aside -- a girlfriend of mine was in similar situation and had him removed after years. Her kids were grade school age. Couple days after he left, kids were doing their homework at the table and the daughter, 8, said it was so quiet in the house. The boy, about 10, said "yah, this is what peace sounds like." Blew me away to hear that. I truly hope your house finds peace and you are able to take a deep breath and know what your day is going to be like - peaceful without him. Best of luck and good thoughts.
You hang in there - been there myself
I quit on May 5th 1985 at the stroke of midnight. Just was tired of paying money to keep funding the habit. Plus everything I owned smelled like cigarette smell. I got through it by eating red licorice. I would hold it like a cigarette bite both ends of and pretend I was smoking. That helped, plus living with someone who didn't smoke. the cravings lasted a long time. I don't remember how long but I got over them. Every time I wanted a cigy I'd get my mind on other things.
So just hang in there and soon you will be over it enough for it to be bearable.
Good luck and congrats.
Hang in there!
I've been where you are. That's one of the hardest habits to break. You're doing great. Every time you think you want one, just picture yourself walking into a room full of new people and not smelling like cigarette smoke. Or imagine how good food is going to taste once it's all out of your system. Or imagine how good you'll sleep 2 weeks from now.
You can do it! We're rooting for you.
Hang in there!
First of all, he's reaching puberty and has all that to deal with. Second of all, while dad wasn't great to live with, it is probably still very hard on him to deal with such a big change. He could be having to really face the fact that dad isn't who he wants him to be, and that's so hard on kids. Even when divorce is wanted by all parties, it is still a very sad situation. Lost dreams of a "normal" life!
I have been separated/divorced from my ex-husband for 11 years now, and my 14-year-old daughter still has trouble dealing with the break. My ex rarely calls them, always lies to them, and constantly disappoints them, but she still worships the ground he walks on and treats me and my husband like total crap most of the time. My husband has been around for 10 years, since she was 4, and has tried so hard to be the father she wants/needs, but she won't let herself accept him as her father. She knows her father is a huge disappointment and not who she wants him to be, but she just can't accept it.
I wish I had better advice for you, but maybe it helps to know that it's not just you going through it. Just stand firm on your rules, compliment him on his good qualities, and show and tell him that you love him every day. That age is a hard time for children anyway and then adding divorce on top of that makes it even tougher. I doubt he even knows why he is acting the way he is --- he's just dealing with so many hormones and emotions that he isn't himself.
Just keep doing the best you can and hopefully things will get better soon!
Good luck and God bless!
I say trust your gut-
drownings can happen so easily, even with good supervision. If the other boy's father is going to be drinking who knows what could happen. Plus I have learned in my life that when my gut tells me something I really need to listen. Better that your son be unhappy with you for short while but alive and well.
I do not believe a trust
will jeopardize her other benefits. You should have an attorney who is well versed in this type of thing to go over all the ins and outs of the situation.
Trust
In this day and age.....I don't trust anyone....whether it is child, mother, sister, cousin.......You never know what frame of mind a person is in.......Sorry.....I should have never posted....just wanted to get some insight....not to get knocked down because of a decision I made....
When it comes down to it, you have to trust
your daughter, no matter how old the boyfriend may be.
I do trust her - sm
The problem is her dad. It took her, a counselor, and me to convince him to even get him to agree to let her see him in the mall. I agree with the other posters - I'd like to get him over here to dinner or something, maybe a BBQ now that it's getting warmer. Just have to figure out how to let Dad know they're communicating again.
Trust me ... at the end of the day s/m
no one will be looking at the state of your house. But definitely getting everyone in the household involved and sharing responsibility will give them all a satisfied feeling of being able to contribute. If you are doing all the cooking, lots of things can be done days in advance, a little at a time. It will get done -- try not to sweat it too much. Believe me, your guests will be so grateful that is wasn't them having to do it, they will look at you as the hero!
I don't trust them
They just don't seem to be accurate, and I don't like that they want you to give them information such as your address.
Trust yourself.
You already know the truth. Trust your own instincts. Face whatever you know to be the truth and deal with that.
When we begin asking others, we already have the knowledge but want others to confirm it for us.
You will make the right decision for yourself.
NEVER! Nor would I trust a US doc with a
Hang it up Beyonce
I think she needs to hang it up - with Jennifer doing such a great job - there is no competition there - Beyonce could not hold a candle to Jennifer's booming voice. I do believe that she is out and Jennifer is going to be the "next big thing". So long Beyonce - Jennifer is much classier, as well. Thanks for being yourself and showing up Beyonce - even with Jay-Z on her arm - Beyonce is a has been - and thankfully so - she is a poor role model for our young girls.
Scounces, how do you hang these?
I saw some really pretty ones on Craigs List but I have never had and wondered how they were hung? Thanks.
Hang it outside. If it's a little chilly out, sm
the cool air will freshen it right up and it will smell absolutely fabulous.
Good for you and hang in there!
 Love your own community service idea! Sounds like you've got a good head on your shoulders and are a strong anchor for your son. I hope things start to turn for the better for both of you. Take care of yourself!
Whoa...hang on a second
To say not to get married is a huge statement. I've been married for 20 years to an awesome man. All men are not controlling, manipulative, insecure jerks. I have my own mind and I use it, my husband does not tell me what to think, how to act, etc., just as I don't do that to him. We are one in marriage, but still our own person. Marriage is a wonderful, beautiful thing when done with the right person. I am grateful I'm not single from what I've heard of the dating world lately, not much good out there to choose from (all the good ones are taken...). Marriage is not about becoming someone's property; it's about uniting 2 people who are in love to become one in God's eyes, yet still maintaining your own identity and self. Married couples work together to make each other happy. It's a give and take situation, more than anything else in the world. And marriage is not easy, not by far, but you have to work together, not against each other. I'm sorry you ended up with a big, fat jerk...it happens to the best of us. There are, however, ways out! God frowns on divorce, period...but I also believe that God frowns on one person using and manipulating another, especially a husband and wife. I'll say it again, marriage is AWESOME......with the right person and thank God I found mine...he's the best!
Hang out your laundry if possible
Start hanging your wash out rather than using the dryer. It will save big, not those pennies they claim you'll save by unplugging your toaster. (By the way, my son, an electrical engineer, claims unplugging your toaster saves nothing. Unplugging a coffee maker if it has a clock does save a little.)
Hang in there and talk to others.
Don't jump on the bandwagon of calling anyone "alcoholic", I'm not saying he's not but he may be a problem drinker or have a drinking problem. I have been to ACOA meetings and went home crying every time, it was too painful because it brought back all the fighting and nightmarish things there, although it did help to talk to others. It's tough to do but helped. I would not confront him with that word as it is a diagnosis and a label. I might say, "Gee, Dad I wish you wouldn't drink in front of my kids, I hate to see that, we try not to." Confronting sometimes depresses them into drinking. I was fortunate, my dad went to some retreats and quit cold turkey and my kids never knew it, in fact, they hate me to ever mention it, as they idolize him. So he died in my arms at 81, told him he was a "good man" and I am not sorry. My bros. hated him and I feel sorry for them. I feel peace. He has to think about it but don't lecture him, just casually bring up that you hate drinking or you hate your kids to see people drinking. Tell him you care about him though.Perhaps if you believe in it, you could pray. It's a very lonely, hard place to be, I know. I will never be sorry I forgave my father. My mother would nag him enough about it until he finally "got it", I think it's more her place than yours. I do ache for you. People who don't walk that walk don't understand, I find they look down their nose on you and you don't need that on top of what you're going through. Have faith. If it gets bad, just pick up the kids and say, "Gee, gotta go, Dad, gotta get these kiddos home." Perhaps he'll get the message, I hope so! Only he can save himself, not you.
regaining trust
I understand your disappoinment...I'm sorry you had to catch him in a lie...that's the worst.
Stick to your initial plan and don't give in....He's gotta regain/earn your trust back at this point before you let him have the car. The end of the semester may seem like an eternity, but it's only about 8 or 9 weeks and then he'll be home for Christmas break. He'll live and perhaps thank you some day.
It appears the girlfriend's parents and you are on the same page. That's a big plus.
Did you ever get that cell phone back?  Cat
I do know a special needs trust will not
xx
trust your heart
Trust yourself and trust in God, as well as your doctors. They would not want anything bad to happen to your baby. By the way, if you ever have a chance to go see the Body World 3 exhibit you would love the embryo/fetus exhibit. It is absolutely amazing what a 4wk embryo looks like and how he/she develops by 16 weeks into an absolutely perfectly formed baby. I wish you the best of luck. Please keep us updated on your progress.
How sad not to trust anyone, even family nm!
NM
Not sure if I trust her judgement.....she
xx
Trust your instincts. nm
xx
Hang on, though. The rate could have changed...sm
If any payments were late (or missed), the rate could have gone up astronomically for the OP. They may well have gone up and up. It's probably in the fine print of the card agreement that that will happen automatically with late payments.
And I have heard financial experts say that it's not a good idea to call and cancel a card if you still have a balance on the card, because then you have no way to negotiate with them. Though it doesn't sound like any negotiating was able to happen in this case, you're supposed to keep asking for the person's supervisor (and their supervisor, if necessay), and be persistent, until you get to talk to someone who can help you with lowering the rate and maybe waiving some of the fees.
Then I would apply for another card with a lower rate (and make darn sure you don't make any payments late or miss any payments!) and transfer that WA MU balance over (and ask if they can wave the transfer fee when you apply for the new card).
BTW, I recently applied for a credit card with WA MU because the offer was for 0% interest for 15 months on balance transfers, and the person was definitely in India. Every time I interruped him to ask him a question, it was like he then had to start over reading his "script" but I could understand him.
I asked if he could wave the balance transfer fee, and he said he was unable to do that. I didn't persist or ask to speak to his supervisor, but I should have. According to the experts, the time to negotiate is before they have your business. After they have you as a customer, they aren't so interested!
golly, maybe we should hang her by her thumbs (sm)
OP said the child didn't get much sleep because of problems with her younger sibling.
It is quite possible the child is having some jealousy issues or other issues causing her to act out. Not to mention not having a good night sleep. I know my concentration is a little off if I haven't slept well. Probably a little harder for a 5-year-old.
I don't think it is prudent to jump to punish a child when it is out of character for that child to misbehave, especially if the child had already received punishment.
Yes, it will humble her. It could also demean her. I'm definitely no expert, except by experience. When this child has future emotional issues that she is not quite sure how to deal with, she defintely will be too humble to act out or to try to talk to her mom about them, because she has been taught not to. She'll just keep them locked inside or act out in a way she won't get caught.
A 5-year-old is not to young to be asked why she acted the way she did, or to discuss it. Why do parents have a knee-jerk response to just impose some kind of punishment without trying to understand first?
I'm not saying an apology is wrong, I just don't think it should be yet another punishment. If anything, mom should discuss it with her, like... "honey, I really think you owe your teacher an apology. What do you think?" Let it be the child's decision. It's good training to let a child make decisions like this.
The teacher punished the child. That's her job. It is our job as parents to try to understand our kids and open lines of communication and let them get used to making decisions.
Hang one of those unsightly fly strips.
The old timey ones they used to hang. They still sell them. Made by Catchmaster scented bug & fly catcher. They do work. Think I bought some at Wal-Mart. Comes rolled up about the size of a shotgun shell, you pull it out and it unravels and you tack it with the tack provided. They won't get off of that booger! Warning - Don't lean your head into it accidentally! Oh yes I did...
|
