Giving/lending should be a choice
Posted By: made by the owner of it on 2008-11-24
In Reply to: Giving - debjo
I prefer to make the decisions as to what, if any, possessions of mine should be loaned, and to whom. If I'm kept in the dark about it, it feels a lot like theft when I don't know where my stuff is. If I then discover its been spirited out of the house by a loved one, it feels like a betrayal.
The government already takes whatever it deems necessary out of my paycheck so I can be anonomously generous to whoever they deem needy.
It is very, very easy to be generous with other people's money and stuff. Example - next time someone wants to borrow something from me, we'll just come get it from your house. Obviously you won't mind, and I can feel sooo good about myself by helping someone else by handing them YOUR stuff. I'll try really hard to remember to tell you I decided to do that, so you can feel as great about it as I do.
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lending tree dot com
I am interested in buying a home. The banks here want at last 20% down. I am just wondering what other options I have.
Probably to him, it's more like lending out a hammer
I really doubt that he thought of that as much more than you lending out his hammer to a neighbor. I guess he would have felt stupid saying, "Uh, yeah, we have one but I better ask before I let you use it."
If it's ruined, ask him to get you another one of the same quality. Chances are though that it's fine and no worse for wear.
I used lending tree..good experience
you do have options. If you fill out their form online you will have literally half a dozen banks bugging you giving you loan deals. There are a ton of different options for you. I ended up getting a great deal, no money down, first-time home buyer. I did not take the first deal I was offered either and that would be my suggestion to you. Don't be afraid to tell one bank you've been offered a better rate somewhere else. They will try to beat the other rates if they can to get your business. You will get the best rates and loan for you that way. Good luck to you on your home purchase. I would recommend lending tree definately.
Not by choice earlier in life, but now no kids by choice
When I was young we desperately wanted kids. We tried for years. (I never took birth control ever, and we even took fertility drugs and planned for multiple kids, just never worked out). Then went through a period of years where husband didn't want them but I did, then years where husband wanted them but I didn't, then about 15 years ago we both decided we didn't want them. We didn't even know what we wanted in life for ourselves and we figured if we couldn't figure out what we wanted why in the world would we bring kids into the world. Now I'm thankful we never did have kids and hope that we never do (I'm 52 with only one ovary - had ectopic pregnancy a few years back), but chances are I do not think we will ever have kids. Now I just cannot tolerate the kids. The little ones are very cute and we love hearing them play in our neighborhood. Some of the things they say are the funniest, but once they get to a certain age it seems like something in them transforms. When they lose the innocence of youth and start becoming little bullies talking back to their parents with their snotty attitudes we just always say, if he was my kid he'd never see the light of day again. Nothing drives me more insane to see the way some of these kids talk to their parents.
But now a days with all the bad going on in the country (around the world) and the country heading for disaster, and if the Mayan calendar is correct and in 2012 we see some major earth changes and the possibilities of civilizations being wiped out, who would want to put their kids through that.
So, I just say - I'm free of kids and loving it!
Both! JK, actually considering giving up
coffee and wondering if Morning Thunder has caffeine or not. I love my coffee, though. Don't know if I can do it.
Giving
Two years working as a missionary overseas has taught me that material things are really not important. Do not hold onto things with such a tight fist. I guess after see children begging in the street for food daily kind of changes your perspective. Oh and then the women who washed her clothes on a rock made me vow to never complain about washing clothes in a machine.
Forgive your husband. His giving nature is more important that a rolling pin. A fire, like those in Califronia, or other natural disaster can cause you to lose all of these things. Things really do not matter anyway do they?
Have a nice Thanksgiving, and be thankful you can afford food to use a rolling a pin on. So many people in the world cannot.
giving up the
The older I got the more I got these symptoms from too many dairy products. Once I cut back the bloating went away. I think the sitting just makes it more noticeable because you cannot get away from the smell! (hope that is not too graphic:)
holiday giving
What you are doing is a wonderful thing and I understand your hurt feelings. Perhaps next year you could channel your energy into giving where it would DEFINITELY be appreciated. Regardless of whether or not you support the war in Iraq, there are many of our troops there who would love to receive a card or care package for the holidays. There are plenty of needy children here in our country who could use a card or gift for the holidays. Why not give where it is wanted and needed? Your church can give you the name of a needy family for you to help at the holidays. You have many options to chose from. Pick something that will make it feel good on both the recipient and the givers side??
Have you tried giving some fluids?
I have a shih tzu with diabetes. When is sick he will get close or under my knees. Listen to him he's trying to say I'm sick. Try feeding him some rice with a little chicken in it, something bland or even canned pumpkin, not the pie filling. Good source of fiber in both diarrhea and constipation for dogs and humans. When mine was sick the other day I got a syringe and would give him grape flavored ProPel water by gatorade, about 1 oz at a time every hour or so and then sooner as long as he kept it down. Just enough to keep from getting to dehydrated. Dogs can go down really fast when dehydrated yet some vets say they can go awhile without food/water. Not if already dehydrated though. I would recommend going on petpeoplesplace.com forum you can get some good advice with people with same breed or problems. They also make something called Rescue Remedy for anxious/nervous dogs you might check into.
I am glad everyone is giving their sm
opinion. I value that. I told in the past to work with us. If it is a specific thing, like a late movie, concert etc we can be very flexible, but to just hang out at someone's house or ride around town it is not necessry to be out past 1 a.m. Her 21 year-old sister agrees with me which is surprising. Her friends don't have curfews, but they also did not get into college either. I told her she can bring anyone home. She told me these are not the kind of people you bring home. Last night I caved in and told her 2 a.m. She did come at that time but I kept waking up untl then. I got up at 7 a.m and it is now 9 a.m and she is still sleeping. I have to admit at19 I did not have a curfew but I was always home by 1 am because I know my parents expected us to be respectful. THANKS AGAIN.
I never knew they had that! Thanks for giving
me JUST ONE MORE snack to try!!! LOL. 
What about just giving from the heart?
Why put such a price tag on something so trivial? Jesus is the reason for the season!
Received none, but instead of giving one (sm)
which I planned on doing, after seeing something on the news about them, I just decided to give cold, hard cash (no complaints, btw). Anyhow, the news story said that stores profit greatly from them since people lose or forget about them, or buy more than the value of the gift card. So, I decided to just buy 50 one-dollar bills for my son's GF for a better effect LOL.
And that is precisely why they are giving it to
They are trying to stimulate the economy. They WANT people to spend it. They don't want you to put in in the bank. That's why they are not giving it to people who have money.
Re handing out money to people who don't file... that is incorrect. They do file. They just fall below the income amount to pay taxes.
I would prefer to be in a tax bracket that gives me less of this handout than one that gives me more.
Anyone giving up anything for Lent??
I'm going to be brave and say no to candy for the next 40 days!
Gift Giving
I just got married in July 2008, bought a new home, and am now expecting my third child in April 2009 so we ourselves have had many blessings this year but our financial situation is also pretty tight. We will not be buying gifts for anyone but our children. Our family will receive homemade treats this year. We still like to do something nice for them because they have done so much for us this year and every year but we don't have a lot of money to play with.
In my case, we take care of our obligations (bills, our children, etc.) before we worry about "gifts". We feel that providing our children with things that need and the love that they deserve is more important than any material gift will ever be. Our family understands our situation and is very happy just to spend the holidays with us without the expectation of a gift because honestly the quality time with family is the biggest gift we could give each other.
In my opinion, you should just explain the situation to them and let them know that you will not be giving gifts this year. They may take it hard but they will get over it. You have to do what you have to do. Gifts aren't the real reason for the Christmas season anyhow.
Good luck to you!
Giving birth at 70?
A 70-year-old woman from India claims she has become the world's oldest new mother.
Rajo Devi and her husband Bala Ram had wanted a child in all their 50 years together.
She claims to have given birth to a baby girl at the end of November after having IVF treatment. Her husband is 72.
OK, I'm giving it a try again, except for the shoes.
I cleaned my sink last night and will keep that clean. Got up this a.m. and got dressed and ready for the day, which does indeed make a difference in my attitude. The only thing I won't do is wear my shoes in the house. This is something I've never done. It's not a cultural thing, it's must a me-thing. I'm always in socks in the house and keep my Crocs by the door for quick trips outside to mailbox or garden. The only time I wear shoes is when I'm out and about. This is something I've done all my life, and it just feels very weird for me to have shoes on in the house.
DH's choice
This is the dog my DH says we can have! He is 5 years old. He has been a show dog, but he finds it too boring, so we get to adopt him .... if Sasha approves of him. Do you think he's pretty?
http://www.synama-wintersweet.com/trey.asp
I am told this is an excellent line for show Siberians. You can tell who the champions are (to see their other dogs, click "Our Siberians" tab at the top) by the CH before their names. 
don't have a choice....
have to get the kids off to school, but most of the time still in my pjs
My choice . . .
Denzel Washington, Paul Newman, Robert Redford.
Again, you do not know whether they had a choice
or not. This is simply your opinion that they did not have a choice. Yes, teenage girls, or boys, for that matter, can be married with the consent of their parents. Again, we do not know the facts in this case. You have even gone as far as saying the men are "old and stinky." How exactly do you know this? You do not... That is simply your opinion. I have lived in St. George, Utah, which is very close to an area where these people live, and I have seen many young (20s-30s), what I would consider attractive men, married to these women. It is best not to stereotype people, especially when all of the facts are not available.
It is not your choice...
As I stated above, it really is NOT your choice! She could REQUEST leave, or a reassignment, but nothing is saying that it will be approved! Especially in the Marines! There aren't always, "ways to get around that."
choice-
gay is a choice sort of like being male or female is a choice, sort of like having brown eyes is a choice, sort of like being tall is a choice. Whatever. One does not choose to be gay nor does one decide to be gay.
Of course I do! I'm an MT- I have no choice!
If I want new clothes, you can't beat Walmnart's prices, plus they usually have some of the cutest clothes.
The rest of the time, I go to Goodwill and Thrift Stores. Just found great new one in the East Bay Area (CA) called Thrift Town, and got a perfect-fitting pair of Levi's for $3.50, and two lightweight hoodie workout-type jackets for $1.00 each. Can't beat that!
I would think 15 is good if you're giving her something else with it.
However, $90 for cut and color is inexpensive? I live in a pretty expensive area and basic color generally runs around $35 to $40 and cuts are not always $50+. I'd say she is expensive but if she is good probably worth it.
Respect or giving up your free will.
If she wants to go to church, and have that church a major part of her life, why should she give that up. He shouldn't have to go if he doesn't want to either. Sometimes divorce isn't a sad/bad thing.
what are you giving your child's teacher
I was thinking some sort of gift card...I'm sure she is overloaded with trinkets and Christmas ornaments, etc. Any creative suggestions? 
MERRY CHRISTMAS...
Fox still has not announced if they are giving any money....sm
to the cause. Notice that they keep wanting people to donate, mentioned corporate sponsors but not once have mentioned any contributions they will make. They also have no mention of this on their website.
Good for you for giving it your best shot.
 You obviously found something that attracted you to the man since you are with him. Any and all relationships require work. We are each different individuals, and in order to live together, need to find the balance that makes each happy.
Stealing then giving to charity?
Used the stolen money to make donations to churches?!? Who does she think she is - Robin Hood? Or was she thinking on judgement day she could say "Yeah, I did some stealing, but I gave some of it to God, so its all good"?!
Is giving grandparents a scrapbook
I think it would be, but decided to get opinions. Thank you in advance.
I'm giving mine COAL. LOL. nm
nm
Well, I'm guilty of giving neighbors' dog
he does come over our fence, literally climbs over, and comes into our yard and then our house. He goes straight to the kitchen, waits for a treat and then goes out the front door and to his yard. He gets ignored a lot so I feel sorry for him. He's so cute.
See my post above about gift giving sm
Take care of yourself first! I am glad you give so much of yourself, but take it from the source, stop killing yourself, you will know what I mean some day. Take care of you and the rest will follow. I am so tired.....stop burning the candle at both ends, charity begins at home. Then when done at home, go bowling!!
I'm giving up negative comments
I'm going to let only positive comments pass my lips, otherwise I will stay quiet. Believe me, the Lord knows what a sacrifice this will be for me.
If you had read further, instead of giving ok to steal,
then you would find out other things missing. I do not understand why you would basically condone stealing because it was "meaningless things?" I work for what I have. I am certainly in no ways ashamed and neither should I be. Stealing is just that, stealing and I think it is part of thou shalt not .......
Too small for me... love my SUV and not giving it up...
and will be getting another one. Prius and the like okay for in town driving but I live rurally, shop once a week, load up the SUV and it's done. My gas mileage is 20 -24 mpg and I can afford the gas.
I can see why some folks are giving up their pets
I just took Spot and Nerys to the vet for routine senior kitty blood checks. I also got Nerys a refill on her prednisalone. It cost $325.
Those furballs had better appreciate it tonight when I shove pills down their throats.
I think you're giving them too much leeway
by thinking they might have done it out of habit. When you know someone doesn't do something, whatever it might be, you don't do that thing. They know she doesn't do the texting thing and they did it anyway. I think they were being snots.
RE: Giving dogs bones
I was just wondering if any dog owners out there give their pups bones. I know to avoid chicken bones and such but what about marrow bones from the butcher, are they safe to give?
Gift giving is HARD
So much pressure!!! Am I right??? I feel this every time I give a gift. This kid sounds like he is going to get a lot of gifts anyways. All I got, way back in 2002 when I graduated, was a cake and a dinner with my family. I would give the kid at the most $25. He just graduated High School, which is what kids are suppose to do. Now if it was college and he graduated then of course I would give more. He should be lucky that you care enough to think about him and give him something even though you seem to be struggeling with it, which is not your fault.
Giving freely but never getting back
So how many years should one spend $100-$250 on someone's birthday or Christmas while receiving nada in return all year long, not even thanks? It sure doesn't make a person feel loved or appreciated - and its hard to have the "joy of giving" when you're giving into an endless void and know there will be no presents for YOU. I want to be seen as a person with needs and feelings too - not just a perpetual gift machine, or permanent Santa. I'd rather give to charity than my kids when I have to force them to acknowledge they even GOT a gift, much less twist their arm until they choke out a thanks - and they act like I must be an alien with 2 heads to think THEY should give anything to anyone.
Actual conversation between me and 30-something kid
me - Hi, how you been, etc. (five minutes into conversation with no mention of present) Say, did you get a package in the mail from company X?
kid - yeah, that was a surprise.
me - well, did you LIKE it?
kid - oh, yeah. It was really nice, made my day! Showed my friends and they were like, wow!
me - well, I wasn't sure if you even GOT it, or if the company had even sent it to you. So I thought I'd check and see.
kid - Uh, yeah I got it. Um, thanks.
me - my holiday was pretty lonely, nobody called, and I didn't get any presents.
kid - mine too. You're the only one who ever gets me anything, everyone else just ignores me.
me - well, if you were lonely you could've called me.
kid - yeah, I know, but I was too depressed because everyone was ignoring me.
I BANG MY HEAD ON THE WALL!!!!
I was only giving you back your RUDENESS
you posting the whole evening against a woman who is in distress! Do you understand? You talk about rudness and hypocrisy? Now rudeness struck you, feels nice?
I hope you changed your attitude.
yes to both..but by choice, not by force.sm
some docs get caught up on their dictations while on holiday. I am alone and have nothing better to do anyway, so why not make some extra cash. but that's just me. good luck in your search.
ok-it's about choice-don't be intimate....sm
don't forget in the USA (outside of Alaska) there are 10 women for each man.......40 years ago it was 8 men for each women but we know how those numbers changed.....15 minutes out of 24 hours or 2x's a week being intimate for an hour in a 168-hour week - is too much to ask for? *curious*
Sounds like they don't have a choice, it's where YOU want them to be.
x
Being overweight sure is a choice, just like sm
smoking cigarettes or doing drugs is a choice. If you are making the right food choices, exercising, drinking water, or even following a Weight Watcher's plan, you will lose weight, unless you have a problem with one of your organs where you retain "water weight". I, quite frankly, am tired of people sitting around asking "how do I lose weight" when they are not making good food choices and not staying active? If you have trouble with arthritis, then you can do aqua therapy (get in a pool even if it is heated). Anything that gets your heart rate up is exercise. The "government" is not at the grocery store holding your hand or at that fast food restaurant making you buy those burgers. I'm sorry, but that is JMO. 
That is a great choice.....by the way,
lots of people talking about her and I wondered if anyone else noticed her wrist is constantly bandaged or sometimes has loads of bracelets. I can make a good guess on that but will not state here. Just a thought.
We do have a choice. We can choose to keep our
undies on and not engage in sex or we can choose some form of birth control (albeit it fails from time to time).
That was her choice, not mine
it was her first marriage and she paid for it. I paid for the rehearsal dinner. She is the kind that does not want outside assistance, not from me and so I never BUTT in. It is probably nice for daughters who want their mother involved, mine happens to just want to be the 1 who does it by herself. Very independent and always like that. She never asked me to pay for anything - I volunteered for the dinner.
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