Four marriage counsellors so far over a period of about 8 years (nm) :(
Posted By: Carolina MT on 2008-03-24
In Reply to: Do not do anything else until you attend marriage counseling - sm - melee
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We've been to several marriage counsellors -done with that (nm)
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If a person hasn't had a period in 13 years, doesn't that
My money is riding on the tumor theory posted below.
no - 17 years of marriage
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Congratulations on so many years of marriage
It's my parent's 48th this year. Have fun at the concert. I'm actually leaving in a few minutes to go to a Matchbox 20 concert with my daughter. It was her 14th birthday (10th) present from my husband and I. I wish we were going in a limo. The weather her is supposed to turn really nasty in a few hours.
After 13 years of marriage and 2 children I swore
the next time I moved would be in a pine box (although I plan on being cremataed and srpinkled). We made the mistake of having a 2 story house with no way to put a bedroom on the first floor. I still hope to never move, but some day it may be a must. I have terrible knees and am not sure if I can do the steps 20 years from now.
Oh, I would have dropped everything! Celebrating 15 years of marriage in June!
Yep - Four different counsellors! (nm)
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Probably got her period or something just as --
silly. She was ordered back to court this morning though and I bet will end up back in jail as the sheriff messed up big time. This "medical" condition has never reared its ugly head before so why now.
No, I mean no alcohol period. nm
No wonder I got my period early!!
:)
I wouldn't have it. Period. sm
Let's Review: Because this man has no decency for manners and boundaries, his father is no better, so you should sit there and squirm?
Get your "@$&s* back, girl! I wouldn't spend one more afternoon like this.
But I would never have let it gotten this far. But that doesn't mean that you can't turn this thing around. He is an adult, as are you. Too bad someone will have to stand up and be the real one. Yes, I'm on your side. Totally!
Keep us posted.
My Friday is Sunday, end of the pay period.
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Most teachers have at least one planning period when they
can grade papers. If their job requires work-related hours away from school, they are given comp time.
But you know how long a normal period
should last, so therefore you take matters into your own hands and be more assertive before you drop over.
"did it SOUND like I used a period?""
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(Actually Harry S Truman. No period after the S.
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I wouldn't talk about it again with him, period.
I doubt you will ever get it unless he grows up and accepts responsibility for himself.
I wouldn't waste my breath and energy being upset over it any longer. If he came over or called me talking about it, blaming me, I'd hang up or tell him to leave and push him out the door.
The day he can speak to me with decent respect and take his own accountability like a man is the day I would open that door or stay on the phone with him.
Ridiculous.
I just 'knew' long before my period was even
late. I also knew I was having a girl even though everyone kept telling me it would be a boy. Strange how the mind/body works! My breasts were also horribly tender at about 1-1/2 to 2 months along. My money is on you deserving some congratulations... :)
I agree, a 2-1/2 year old is gross, period.
But a blanket over the toddler? The kid would probably start playing peek-a-boo and winking and laughing. How about that for a visual. Ick! lol
Gosh - I'm dressed when working, period. LOL
nm
Period pain after LEEP procedure
 I had LEEP for cervical cancer a few years back. Cancer is gone now, but I have horrible periods. Am I alone? Does anyone else suffer since LEEP surgery? I also have fibromyalgia which only adds to the discomfort.
Get an excuse, for a normal period that most all girls have?
You seem to be jumping to higher ups before anyone talks with the teacher. I would ask for a conference with that particular teacher to see what is said about the incident. Can you just image giving every female off for having a period? Does that seem like you should have an excuse for something that is so normal? I say introduce the daughter to tampons, welcome to the adult world!
Hubby's friend is a jerk - period!
..
Cold/sinus infection with beginning of period?
Okay, here's the deal. The day before my period, for the last year or so, I get a horrendously bad cold/sinus infection/flu-type process. It usually goes away about a day or two after my period. I have never ever had this happen before and its really bad this month. I have all the symptoms... stuffiness, red runny eyes, runny stuffy nose, pounding headache, throat like daggers, etc. It started as postnasal drip yesterday and I thought ohhh great... here we go. Needless to say I was up most of last night in complete tears because of the pain of it all and not being able to swallow at all. I have tried researching on the internet about this happening, but can't find any information. Has anyone heard of this or had this happen? I just want to stop it. truly, I would take the worst god awful cramps over this torture. I have had this both on and off the pill and I am only 31. Any information would be appreciated as I know what a wealth of information our community could be. Unfortunately, I am in Europe and so I can't go to my GP easily. The doctors here don’t do anything about anything unless its major either and I know they will brush it off as some silly sinus infection, but it happens every month and goes away in 3 days on its own, so it can't be a run of the mill thing. Any advice is welcome. I go home to the US in 6 months and I can wait if I have to, but maybe some angel out there knows something to help. I have tried tons of medications and herbal things/natropathic and nothing works except my period being established.
Thanks in advance and sorry for the icky topic. ;)
Still entitled to my opinion: Shocking animals is cruel, period.
NM
Yes, sore breasts and missed period are definitely good indicators...
take a test already and let us know--lol
My husband is 7.5 years younger. Been together almost 20 happy years...nm
nm
My feelings; people shacking up together for years and years
and then all of a sudden deciding to get married don't need a thing, obviously. A shower should not even be given. I lived with my now husband a while (nowadays who doesn't!) before we married and I also had been married before years ago but he was not....so of course HIS mom wanted a shower. I told her absolutely not unless it was just the immediate family, his mom, sisters, etc, more like a celebration/get together. And so that's what we did. Showers are tacky, period. Unless it's a couple of young kids getting married straight out of the house and that doesn't happen much anymore.
That would definitely not be enough for me to consider it a marriage. sm
why do you all think you need some obviously lame guy to complete you? Is it just youth and hormones?
marriage
You are so fortunate. In this day and age, everyone is all about "me". My husband has no CLUE what it means to "work as a team." He simply cannot grasp it at all. He does what he wants to, when he wants to and how he wants to, whenever he wants to. If I ask too many questions he gets angry at me. I am now figuring out 15 years later that I made a pretty big mistake by marrying him. However, we have three beautiful children, and the one thing we do agree on is that they need both parents to raise them. My husband would argue the color of the sky if he was in the mood. He is contrary simply to be contrary. I give up. He gives me the information he thinks I need to have. I don't ask him for anything anymore because he absolutely will not do it (help with getting everything done, i.e., housework, paying bills, makign phone calls, etc.). All of the concerns I had before we got married (which I did bring up to him) have come true. I should have known it. People just DO NOT know how to work together anymore.
marriage
I think we are raising our sons to be "mama's boys" and not be the proper leaders they need to be. Plus, in this day and age of no boundaries, children have no guidance and absolutely no direction. My husband does not have a plan from one minute to the next. It is absolutely crazy. he cannot set a goal and reach it if his life depended on it. We just wait to see what he is going to do next. I honestly never know what he is going to come up with. He absolutely adores his children, and they feel the same. I have seen what divorce does to the children, I will not do that to mine. But sometimes, I just want to scream. Thanks for allowing me to vent. I have asked him to go to counseling, but he doesn't see a need (he has everything he needs). I will teach my children what to look for in a mate and the warning signs. Hopefully they won't have the trouble that I have had.
Marriage
Marriage is a relationship that you have to take care of each other first and always. He should always think about what makes you happy and you the same. You both should be covered at all times. There needs to be ongoing communication so you both can determine what makes things work for you. Most marriages fail because people don't want to talk and would rather "mind read" or assume. You know what they say about assume. You should always treat your spouse like he/or she is the most important person in the world and is first in your life. If you have someone that takes advantage of that and does not appreciate it, then that is not the one for you. Ignorance and immaturity takes kindness for weakness. A mature man or woman knows that that is how they should be treated and how they should treat their mate.
Second marriage
I'm planning to get married for the second time. My last marriage was 17 years ago and I've been on my own with my 14 y.o. son for almost 10 years. For my last wedding I dotted all the I's and crossed all the T's but I was so exhausted I didn't even enjoy the wedding. I think I have a mental block for wedding planning now because I never really thought I'd be doing it again. However, I have zero doubt that I want to be with this man. We both just want to be together and can't decide whether to just go on a trip and get married or have something small with our families and a few close friends. We think it would be nice to have our immediate families help us start our marriage off but I can't seem to make myself think about planning things and picking things out. Mainly I'd just like to wear a pretty dress (not necessarily even a wedding dress and definitely not an elaborate one). It seems if you start planning to have one thing it calls for another. I've looked at some of the wedding checklists and it makes my head hurt to think about picking out cakes, etc. I don't want anything tacky but I don't want to spend a lot of time on details. Any ideas? Also, what are your thoughts on giving your future husband a wedding gift. A do or not? Thanks so much for any advice you have to offer. I don't think we are going to wait long at all so I won't have much time to plan a lot anyway, which suits me just fine.
Second marriage
I live in Eastern North Carolina. There seems to be a lot of placed in Tennessee that look pretty romantic too. I'm browsing through those now.
Second marriage
Lots of great ideas. Thanks so much. I really like the iPod idea.
I think she needs to get out of the marriage - NOW!! (sm)
That could end up being a dangerous situation as well. I have had female friends from this type of cultural background who had to go into hiding from their own brothers to keep from being beaten to death for the crime of dating a white man. She really needs to get out now before they have children.
What is there to think about? Marriage...
is taking a vow.
vow
verb [T]
to make a determined decision or promise to do something, which includes not sleeping with other women and no cheating WHATSOEVER. He broke the Vow.
Marriage is a vow.
Of course I understand that marriage is a vow. Marriage is also a commitment. Problems that seem insurmountable sometimes are not, given time.
Before your marriage, did you or did you not....
Let your DH see you in your wedding gown?
Marriage Help
Am hoping to hear advise from other in my shoes. Been married 18 years and completely and totally unhappy. Husband doesn't beat me, is a good provider, just not in love any longer. Kids involved under age 14. Do I stay or do I go? Trying to stay until kids leave house but very hard - hard to even look at him. He has told me i am average but he love me, has corrected all my mistakes throughout the years, because only he and God are perfect oh but he loves me more than anything! A year ago he wrote me a letter that pointed out all my flaws and could not understand why I wanted him to leave. Please advise. I am so terribly sad and miserable and don't know what to do. State I live in very expensive and would never want to move my kids elsewhere. Hints on staying in an unhappy marriage would be great.
Bad marriage
Hi Done:
I left last September after 30 years. I am happy being on my own even though it means I must work long hours to support myself. My husband and I are separated, not divorced and I took no money from him.
The marriage was not so terribly bad - no physical abuse, very little verbal, but the interesting thing is that my children were way more aware of the underlying unhappiness than I would have imagined. I thought we never really argued - they thought the atmosphere was tense all the time.
I will say that I feel lucky that my youngest child is 17. On the other hand, she chose to stay with her dad (as well as my 21 year old son) and that was/is heartbreaking. But I did not have the right to choose for her. I moved into an apartment across the busy street from where I lived. My children can visit whenever they want.
It seems that my children are actually happier now too. Can you arrange a trial separation? The thing is, nothing has really changed in the situation between my husband and I, and it doesn't seem like it will. We both have an incentive not to make things final with divorce - mine is to keep his good insurance coverage, his is to avoid needing to give me any money.
I feel I had a lot of issues in the marriage due to the incest I suffered as a child and he had issues too. We just were not able to make any progress on this stuff in marriage therapy and neither of us has made any inquiries to each other about the possibility of trying again. And do you really think people can change? I just don't know. I think you have to really want to change. And someone who thinks they are perfect and points our your flaws all the time and tells you that you are "average" is probably not looking to change.
You deserve better for yourself. Just do it on your time and at your convenience. It is possible to stay for a while longer until your children are older. I thought I would wait until my youngest was out of school, but there was one of those "last straw" kinds of episodes last year and that was it.
I wish you the best. But just know that your children are aware of what is going on and do you want them to use your marriage as a model for themselves?
If it's you second marriage and the first one
Didn't workout - then don't spend ANY money on the second one. Save it for the divorce - LMAO 
Before & After Marriage..
Before marriage.....
He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
She: Do you want me to leave?
He: No! Don't even think about it.
She: Do you love me?
He: Of course! Over and over!
She: Have you ever cheated on me?
He: No! Why are you even asking?
She: Will you kiss me?
He: Every chance I get.
She: Will you hit me?
He: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person!
She: Can I trust you?
He: Yes.
She: Darling!
After marriage....
Simply read from bottom to top.
marriage
Once 39 years and we did not live together before either.
Marriage
I know what you mean about smothering. DH has several guys he works with whose wives won't do anything without their husbands. DH and I have always said we have very little in common except how we feel about each other. He doesn't ask me to get out of our warm bed at 5 a.m. in 20 degree weather to go deer hunting and I don't make him go to the beach with me in the summer and get sand in his shorts. It works perfectly for us. Our 24th anniversary is next month and we have 3 awesome kids. Definitely had our ups and downs but it's all been worth it.
Marriage
Well said. I was just thinking that. My husband just told me I have until the kids get out of school next week to get out. This all started over a milkshake of all things! Why are most men jerks? Looking back I have lost over 20 years of my life for a lot of similar reasons. Friends tell me the same info about God ect. But does God want us to be so unhappy???? That doesn't make sense to me at all!
Marriage
Living with someone is hard work, married or not. My parents have been married 45 years. My sister's marriage lasted just under 3 years. I've never been married but have lived with my SO for 3 years. We would get married if the marriage would be recognized everywhere as a valid marriage.
Sounds like your marriage is over
NM
Not sure what posts are below re marriage
but you sound so very well grounded and truly in love and love your husband and obviously he reciprocates. You are blessed but you also sound like a wonderful person who knows how to compromise when necessary and probably pick your battles - if you even have any!! I am also close to your age and going on 25 years of marriage and watch little things in the marriages of my children and I realize how much I have grown and how truly unimportant some stuff is - but sometimes you just don't see it when you are younger... wisdom definitely come with age!! You are blessed! :))
No, he has a son from a previous marriage, but they have none together. nm
m
OMG you just described my entire marriage..
I am waiting for tax returns and I am OUT OF HERE!! We tried counseling, and for US, it just made it worse. We have 3 children..7, 8, and 10. They are sick of him too and have actually BEGGED me to get us out of this house. I know in my area there are a lot of "programs" to help in these situations and I am hunting them down!! Good luck to you and dont sacrifice your life to be unhappy.
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