Ex-spouse on health insurance?
Posted By: Lucy on 2007-11-09
In Reply to:
My daughter just told me about a proposal her ex has suggested. He is close to a thousand dollars in arrears for back child support. Now he wants to negotiate a deal where my daughter will accept about half of what he owes in exchange for his adding her to his job health insurance. She is self-employed and has not had health insurance coverage since their divorce.
I don't think he can do that, can he? Since he has lied about so many things I don't think she will do that unless he can prove she can be covered. Even if he could add her, what would keep him from dropping her for spite if there are problems down the road? Any thoughts? Thank you.
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Health Insurance
Does anyone know where I can get family coverage? I live in NY and I am taking an IC position. Thanks
Health insurance, so not sure.
My copay is the normal amount though, so it may not be too expensive. Our more expensive drugs will have a higher copay. You might see if your doctor has samples, just to see if it will work for you.
This is w/o health insurance either - sm
though ours is cheap (but very, very good). We only pay $140 a month for 4 of us. Of course just about every few months (if not every) something unexpected crops up too, car repair, etc.
Health Insurance
I pay $240 a month for mom's (49yo) health insurance. This is for medical insurance plus a dental & vision discount program. She doesn't go to the doctor alot but when she does go there is always a remaining balance anywhere from $40-$80. Hospitalization through the insurance is set at $5,000 deductible. I am just wondering does this sound reasonable or is there anything else cheaper with good coverage or same coverage???? I checked into BCBS but they are SO expensive. Any input on this is greatly appreciated.
Do not cancel your health insurance. You never know when you will need it. sm
I had no health insurance for 3 years and that is the ONLY reason I went back in-house. I figured I had pushed the envelope far enough and was due for major problems.
Most hospitals have payment plans and will work with you. The hospital I work for has a Care Management department that will come to the hospital to work with you on payment plans or help you find whatever help may be out there and that you can access.
If you keep anything, keep your insurance. Go for high deductible. Find a clinic that has a sliding scale, but keep it if you can.
What have they done?? I heard no health insurance for employees, but what else?
nm
Wal-Mart does offer health insurance to their workers. Wal-Mart pays part and the employee SM
pays part of the premium. Just like other companies do.
Ex-spouse
They are divorced. Get independent and stay independent of him unless she really loves torture.
Maybe Joe's spouse does not like the sm
idea either. It would of been nice if he said lets hang out with Joe's family to see if it everyone was compatible.
Do any of you have a spouse
who can't say no to other people? How do you work it out? Are you just stuck always being the "bad guy?"
Unfortunately, the entire United States is having a difficult financial time. It is obviously not just our household. We have cut back everywhere we can, and I mean everywhere. Our families are having difficult problems as well. We also have an ex-spouse and have had unexpected increases in child support, etc. recently along with unexpected additional expenses where this is concerned. Basically, the child "needs" new glasses, etc. even though the child really doesn't but according to the court we have to pay accordingly. It just seems like it is one thing after another and I know it is for everyone, although the circumstances may be slightly different.
My problem is that I have been telling my husband for months that this was coming, along with Christmas, birthday, etc. He hasn't wanted to accept it. Although we have cut back on many things, on my initiative, it just has not sunk in for him until now...when everything finalized and we dont' know how we are going to pay all of our bills. To top this off, he can't seem to say no to having his nephews stay the weekend, talking to his family about NOT exchanging gifts, etc. I'm the "bad guy" because he is ok with all of it although he admits he has no idea where the money is going to come from. I have been upfront with my family and when people ask me but is it too much to ask that he do the same? I dont' know if it is a man thing, hurting his pride or what but he is so depressed and upset about our financial state, yet can't say no even to the smallest thing. But of course he wants to constantly remind me (the cheap skate and tight-a$$) to cut back on groceries, etc. which I cannot possibly do any more than I have already. We have nothing left in savings. We have no Christmas fund.
I'm just frustrated this morning and don't know where to go from here. I don't want to say "I told you so" but I did tell him and he had no concerns until now...when we are seemingly headed towards financial trouble. I have been working OT but his OT has been cut indefinitely from his employer. I'll be darned if I'm getting a second job so he doesn't have to cut back. I must say he doesn't buy things for himself..its just the piddling away of $20 here and $20 there on top of our already mounting unexpected expenses.
if a spouse cheats...
I'm watching this little polling on Today show (just eating breakfast, i never watch this stuff!) and it says 63% of people would try to save their marriage if their spouse cheated and 73% of the reason was for companionship.
Personally.... I am not sure I have the capabilty of getting over something like that. I think forgiveness is a huge part of life and relationships... but maybe it's insecurity, maybe it's about pride... but I'm not sure I could work through something like that!! I just don't know what could possibly be an excuse! The ladies on are saying, it usually signifies something that needs to be worked on in a relationship, well OBVIOUSLY! And I am not one of those people that thinks if you cheat you dont love the person... but I certainly think it would be really hard to work through or accept, and knowing myself I'm not thinking I could get over it, so I guess I'd be in the percentage of NOT ever wanting to know...
I dunno, I do think it's human nature to be attracted to many different people (i am myself)... but is it human nature to want to physically be with other people? I guess cheating can be emotional as well...
just random thoughts before I get to work!
Have a great day
if a spouse cheats
I have to tell you from the other side of the coin that sometimes people grow apart for one reason or another and things happen. Most people do not cheat because they are looking for something physical. They are missing an emotional connection and find it elsewhere. On the other side of this is that sometimes, not always but sometimes, when the other spouse finds out and realizes why it happened they can work through it together to get back what was missing and what brought them together in the 1st place. I speak from the know on both sides and can tell you that you can get past it and actually end up in a much better place than you ever were before. .
Unemployed Spouse
Is it possible he might be doing something behind your back and acusing you to justify something he has done.
Have your spouse cut your hair
Guys, if you keep your hair short, buy hair clippers with a set of clips and hand over the clippers to your spouse. You may have a couple of cuts that result in a buzzed head, but unless she’s got horribly unsteady nerves, she’ll figure it out.
Dear Spouse:
Please find a girlfriend. I'm sick and tired of taking your crap.
Hugs,
JMHO
Cheating Spouse?
Have you ever caught your spouse cheating? If so, how did you catch him/her?
cheating spouse
I worked day shift and he worked 3-11 so for a few years we would hardly see each other at all. First, let me say that my husband is kind of messy. I would notice that when I came home from work, my home was in the same order that I left it in the morning. Even the curtains had not been opened yet. There were no dirty dishes. There was no sign anybody had been home all day. I would ask and he would always have an excuse..went to play golf before work, went to a ball game, had lunch with the guys, etc.
Then a woman started calling the house in the evening asking for my husband. I would say he was at work, ask if I could take a message and she would say no and hang up. She would call about 3 to 4 evenings a week. I asked my husband who she was and he would say he didn't know.
Then, HER husband called and left a message on our machine one day while we were out. He didn't say any names, just said stay away from my wife or I'm going to come over and beat your a$$. I asked who was that and my husband said he didn't know.
This all happened over about 4 months when he was offered a transfer with work out of state and we took it. He never admitted having an affair but I know he did. That was 16 years ago. We are still together and before everyone flames me, I will tell you that the man has paid dearly for that little fling. We've never discussed it because how can you discuss something he won't admit to? He didn't leave the house for years without taking 1 or all the kids with him, even to the grocery store or the post office. He never got to do anything he wanted to do, no more boys night out, no more golf weekends, etc. It got to the point where I was feeling sorry for him but he never said a word.
Now that we're in our 50s, I wish someone would take him so he'd leave me alone!
Being a military spouse, I think that...
she should qualify for unemployment, but not indefinitely. She paid in to California unemployment insurance and had to relocate because her spouse is serving our country. She should, in my opinion, be able to draw on unemployment from California for a reasonable period of time until she can get another job. However, that is one of the reasons I like this job. I take it with me whenever I move.
Marriage may be a vow, but if OPs spouse was unfaithful then she has
y
Here is why you DO NOT take an abuse spouse like this to counseling sm
BTDT a couple of times. He manipulated the whole thing to his "issues" with me.
He told counselor: She makes me angry. Counselor looks at me: Why do you feel the need to make him angry?
He told the counselor: I don't like her looks. Counselor asks me: I have you considered getting some help with your weight and looks (umm 140 at 5Ə"??? Where was the problem?)
He told the counselor: She makes this marriage about the kids instead of making it about me...I make all the money...I do all the work (never housework)...and she sits on the couch and eats bonbons all day (what is a bonbon?). THIS MARRIAGE NEEDS TO BE ABOUT ME and what I want, NOT about the kids. Counselor: Why do love your kids so much and why can't you put him first?
LOUSY counselor. I went to another one on my own who said: You may not have bruises, but you are being abused. I know the situation you are in and he forbids you to work and it isn't like you actually have the time. It may take you some time to choose to get out. So, lets focus on ways for you to be stronger until you can walk out the door. HE didn't get any better HE got worse as I started to develop a backbone.
So to all those who say go to counseling, stay in it, learn to be stronger, don't let his words hurt you...YOU ARE FULL OF IT. You all may like being treated the way that DONE is, but I don't. I am a person too, as is DONE. Anyone I might ever be with needs to think I am so wonderful, special, lovely, kind... you name it, they could not stand NOT to be with me. DONE'S husband is telling her, essentially...you okay I guess, but not that great. Plus which, you can't do anything the way I think it should be done. You don't have feelings because you are average looking and this marriage is all about me. Toro poo poo.
Some of you are not very bright, I am sorry to say, but there it is.
Cheating spouse/boyfriend, etc.
Many years ago I was married to a cheating spouse. I was pregnant with our second child when he took it upon himself to cheat with an underage girl in the back of our brand new station wagon. Well, I learned about this when a paternity suit came up with his name on it. Apparently he was so dumb that he did not know the girl had a boyfriend and being the sucker that he was he did not know that they would pin the paternity on him, and get money from him. Too bad it wasn't in this day and time because he would have been in jail because she was only 17, and he was in his 30s. This was only 1 in a string of women that I found out after the fact, and even contracted an STD when I was pregnant!! I also suffered spousal abuse, and have the scars to prove it. After 5 years of this I got out,and the only reason I stayed was for the children, but that was a huge mistake on my part. Now, whenever, I hear or see this on a program it makes me furious that these men think this behavior is okay. It is never okay and leaves many people, including children, to suffer much heartache.
Likening a spouse to a dog or horse...
imagine if a male doc suggested treating a wife like that; the outrage would be heard round the world. Maybe acting like adults and having a conversation like a married couple would help. How demeaning to treat a husband that way. Where do you women find these men that you have to "train"? Gesh, I always thought my DH was fabulous...now I am CERTAIN he is!
No muss, no fuss, no spouse -
.
Do you yell at your kids/spouse?
I grew up in a family of non-yellers. Even when he was drunk, my dad didn't yell. I've raised my voice to DH twice in our entire 34 years together, and one of those times was excused because I was pregnant, hot and miserable. I've never raised my voice to my kids.
Several of my friends are big-time yellers. It makes me cringe when I hear it. I guess cause I'm not used to it.
Buying a house with someone who is not legally your spouse, is
I filed separate from my spouse at the time--sm
against an old (over 10 years) student loan that I had. That was the only thing I filed against and it was way before my spouse and I had even married. Even though I filed in my name only, it affected his credit too, just because we were married. It continued to affect his credit even after we divorced 10 years later. Better think twice. It is not always a good idea to file bankruptcy as a way out of debt. Cut up those cards and start paying cash for things you want/need. The interest on most of those cards will keep you in debt forever. Been there! but not any more! good luck to you!
Has anyone filed bankruptcy separate from their spouse?
My husband and I have all bills and checking accounts separate except for the cars and we split the household bills. I have a ton of credit card debt and with MT pay being less all the time, was thinking this may be the only way out. I know the spouse doesn't have to file if their name isn't on the account, but is this very hard to do? Thanks for any info.
does every woman experience being hit by her spouse at some point? sm
I have had such a hard time getting over my husband hitting me (pulled my hair, banged my head into a carport pole, bruised my arms.) It has been four years. Yes, I have posted on here before. We are now in the process of separating. He never hit me since that time four years ago. But he believes I never forgave him. I feel that I did forgive him, but it changed the way I felt about him. that plus many other problems we have had over the years. Now we are separating because we have been together 20 years, 5 dating and 15 married, and we seem to have argued the entire time. We have never seen eye to eye. But we still care about each other and it is very, very sad. I feel heartbroken on one hand that my marriage is ending, and hopeful on the other hand that maybe my life will get better in some ways. I know monetarily it will not get better. I am hoping that it will be happier though. But what a huge failure. I am wondering if everyone experiences some type of abuse like that at some point in their marriage and I am just being a baby for not just forgetting about it.
My rant: I agree cheating on one's spouse is never SM
acceptable. The one thing that REALLY bothers me, is that men claim that they have to cheat, since sex with their wives is no longer exciting and that their wife won't do what paid companions will and my thought is always the same "Did you ASK her?". If they ask nicely, I'm sure loving wives would be more than willing to comply. Within reason, of course.
For those of you happily married, where did you meet your spouse? sm
Just a curious question. I am single and I am thinking if I stay in church, that might be the best place to meet a good man these days when one finally comes around. It really gets me that some people meet their spouses in a bar and then wonder how they married an alcoholic, lol! 
A spouse can collect widow benefits at age 60, but the benefit is reduced 21% because you took it ea
So, if his benefit is $1000, you would get $790. If you take you retirement at 62, you can keep the widow benefit, or your benefit, whichever is larger. It's worth taking it early because $790 x 24 months (the difference between age 60 and 62) is almost $19,000. My tax lawyer says always take it early.
My dad's health...sm
He has stage IV cancer and has been told his current chemo regimen is his last shot.
Why did you get a dog when you cannot pay for health care
plo
Then you ARE able to pay for health care for her. You are not
o
Age 56, good health; 5' 8" 137-140 lbs.
nm
for my health into a drs. hands without being
x
I understand that but did he say anything health
x
Yes, I saw the her on one of the Health Channels also nm
x
health food :)
i've made this exact same recipe for years -- husband calls it "health food" cuz of the oats. (i just call em no-bakes). I boil mine gently however for 2 minutes, not a second more for soft cookie consistency.
The only thing i do different now is use the DARK Hershey's cocoa -- everyone loves them!!
How's hubby's health?
Has he had a physical or been to the doctor recently? Repeating stories like that and an attitude change such as what you are describing can sometimes mean the onset of Alzheimer's or another form of dementia. I don't want to be a debbie downer, but I think it's something that probably should be looked into.
Good luck.
Would you cancel health ins....sm
if you couldn't really afford it? Or would you scrape by to pay for it? I have contemplated canceling to get ahead on my bills for a while. What if I or my husband or son gets really sick, say our gallbladder or appendix? What would they do? Let us suffer? Will they treat you and let you make payments? I am afraid to let it go because I am scared we may really need it. I don't know what to do.
New Health Tonic??!
I found this very well-referenced, scientific article to be quite amazing and enlightening indeed: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seminophagia -- Knowing these things, some people holding old taboos, attitudes or inhibitions may need to reconsider them!
She qualifies for an IEP under "other health SM
impaired" due to her ADD. You need to make a request in writing for them to perform official testing and to set up an IEP to ensure that your daughter gets the best help available. (Preferential seating--in front of class near teacher, extra time on written assignments, less homework if necessary--i.e., 2 math problems versus 10, non-verbal reminders that your daughter will understand to mean "pay attention, sweety, it's time to do our classwork," etc., etc.) Also, if she is behind academically, they should offer her extra help in that area--although in my experience they may not offer it to someone so young because they learn so quickly at that age and she may be caught up before you know it.
Good luck to you and your daughter!
Chickadee
Requiring a woman to do anything with her health
just treads on nasty ground in my opinion. Where would it end? I think this would be a heck of a step backwards for us all.
You pay for health care. This isnt what I mean. I mean ppl who
hj
Does anyone know about Swanson Health Products?
I received a catalog of their products today (herbs, vitamins, minerals, etc.) and their prices seem really good. I was wondering how good their product is. Do they put a lot of "extra" ingredients in their herbs or do they offer the "real" thing? I know that there are some companies out there that their herb/vitamin supplements are not worth taking because there is so little of the real thing in their capsules. How do you rate Swanson?
Health care is important, but..
ITA, I'm in that situation now, he has health ins, gives me his paycheck sm
every month to pay the bills. Money from MT is extra for movies, clothes, etc. I tried talking to him, said I wasn't happy. He said nothing is wrong. So will stay unless something major happens - and I did consult a lawyer but because we've been married 4 years, the lawyer even said it didn't really benefit me to leave. At least my husband works out of town every now and then and I get a break.
I agree. The health department
needs to go in and take over. The poor little girl is probably dealing with an alcoholic or drugged-up mother or maybe she's mentally ill. The little girl shouldn't be living with such an irresponsible mother. At the very least the health dept needs to go in and fumigate and clean them up and monitor the house and family members. Better that than having 30 families trying to contend with this problem.
You have to confront him. Your health and well being are most important.
I believe people know they are gay from a young age. Some might be confused about it, but, by adulthood, they know they are gay. I cannot imagine a straight guy watching gay porn or, worse yet, seeking gay escorts. He's gay.
Health Maintenance Resources
You can order on line -shipped to your door, no commitment - it was developed for morbidly obese people pre gastric bypass - to get some pounds off before they could have surgery or to determine if they for sure could not lose weight. Food is really good and filling. Check different sites - prices vary. Best site I have found is in Texas. I was really appalled at the taste of Nutrisystem - absolutely had to throw things away.
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