Even a big man is not home 24/7. Leave while he is gone
Posted By: or asleep. nm on 2007-06-02
In Reply to: need advice - Tina
d
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- need advice - Tina
- Even a big man is not home 24/7. Leave while he is gone - or asleep. nm
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No One Can Ask You To Leave Your Own Home
It does not matter whose name the house is in. Do you live in a community property state? Most of them are. The house is community/marital property even if it is in his name. Let him try to sell it without you signing to do that. He can not do that and he can not tell you to leave, no matter how much notice he gives you. HE SAYS he spoke with a lawyer who gave him that bit of advice?? Oh really??? Then tell him to have that lawyer speak to you and tell you that you have to leave YOUR home. That's right - YOUR home. You are married, right? He cannot make you leave.
Since it has come to this, though, I would start getting my ducks in a row financially and otherwise because it sounds like the beginning of the end, no matter how long that takes. To thine own self be true!! Start socking away your possessions and money without his knowledge as previously advised. Hopefully YOU will decide when it is time to go and you will be prepared. People always think they will patch things up and not have to worry about it. Not true. Eventually this WILL play out. Be ready. My heart goes out to you. Please take care of YOURSELF.
I think he is trying to tell me I am making him mad when I leave him home...nm
;;
Note to self: Never again leave home without a back-up outfit!
.
Leave some open boxes of baking soda inside and maybe search for carbon filters to leave in there,
s
Buy a home of my own - not a palace, but more of a smallish home on a large piece of land. (nm)
.
Anyone move from a single family home to mobile home? sm
I own and live in a house in a midwest city in a bad neighborhood (wasn't that bad 11 years ago). I spent the day waiting for the plumber to come and jackhammer the foundation (slab house, no basement) to find a leaky pipe that is flooding my DD's bedroom. Last week, it was the electrician with quotes for costly repairs.
In the meantime, I've really been thinking about selling out and moving into a mobile home. Has anyone done this before? Is a mobile home in a decent park less of a hassle than a regular house? I'm so tired of cutting the grass and spending $$ to fix things and tired of old flooring and cabinets, etc., that are just too costly to replace. I'm single with no man to do these things for me and I can't afford a mortgage on a newer house in a good neighborhood. Some of the pictures I've seen of the mobile homes look really nice and modern on the inside.
Any advice and comments appreciated. Thanks!
Well I figure I can make my own hours & be home when the kids are home (sm)
I worked PT in an office for a while but spent most of my money on childcare in the summer. Full-time in an office was just a nightmare and I felt like I missed a whole year of my children's lives. I want to be in control of my schedule so that's why I'm looking into the cleaning thing. Never thought I would want to do that but live and learn! Some of the most intelligent people alive work as carpenters and similar things because they have learned what's really important in life. Whew....off my soapbox now :-) Good luck to you!
Daniel had a home, a very good home...
with someone in my family at one point.
She met her late husband at a club down the freeway from me. It's not a fancy place, like you say.
She does have a real brother though. That was the connection on our part.
I agree, though. It is sad that all this is coming out the way it is. I believe she was a good person...she just had a lot of problems, mainly drugs. What is really sad is that all of this is going to be seen by her daughter one day when she grows up.
Home Alone 1, A Christmas Story, Home for the Holidays, Chevy Chase's Christmas, sm
There "The Gift of the Magi," He sells his gold watch to buy her a comb for her hair and she sells her beautiful long hair to buy him a chain for his gold watch. It used to be on "Short Stories by O'Henry" but that's long gone, long ago. Good moral to the story. I can't stand "It's a Wonderful Life" -- too depressing, especially with banks closing, too intimidating right now!!!
Home sweet home.
x
Home, Home, On The Range SM
where the beer and the cantaloupe play . . . where seldom is heard . . . .
What happens at home stays at home. (nm)
:op
She is home, by that I mean she is 1 mile from her home.
I am the one that moved away. My brother lives there, but she requires 24-hour nursing care right now, and he is unable to provide that for her. My son is graduating high school this year and I plan to move back to take care of her, but I just can't until then. I did tell the adminstrator that they have 24 hours to figure this out, and then we will bring in the police. I have also threatened to go to the media, and this facility has a very excellent reputation and is run by the Brethren Church, so I would think they might not want bad publicity. It is a pretty small town and this is one of only a couple of care homes in the area.
Leave Them In
My mom uses hers a lot and she leaves them in. I use hers more than I use mine and I leave mine in, too. I just got it out yesterday after a year of not using it and it still worked.
What about when they just leave their
carts in line, taking their packages and leaving for you to move out of the way. I say Excuse me, is this your cart? How rude.
get him help or leave him
nm
No, but I tell her where I'm going and bye-bye when I leave
s
I do want to leave, but (sm)
him being so agreeable scares me. I want to believe that he has been thinking the same thing and that me being the one to say it makes it easier for him not to be the "bad guy" but I am just scared that he is going to somehow try to cause me problems, I guess I just don't trust him.
Why leave is everything is okay? nm
nm
Take this from me. Leave her alone. Seriously. She will come to you sm
when she is good and ready. I was living in a snowed in town, my baby son was born in the middle of winter, my mom was 3,000 miles away, had my MIL with me, husband went back to work a week after son was born. I DIDN'T WANT ANY COMPANY. I didn't realize it at the time but I was suffering from severe PPD. And anything anyone said or did (sister in laws all acted like you did- confused, hurt, did not understand), all because they've never walked an inch in my shoes. I've been where you're friend now walks. Leave her alone. Let her mom know you are still there for her. Don't you dare give up on her, either, due to being offended. I lost a few so called friends because they couldn't handle the way I acted after my first son was born. My reaction: Good riddance. You were never my true friends anyway.
I could write a book on PPD. This is clearly what she is suffering from. And please don't tell me, "oh, just call me! I can help you! I just want to sit in the room with you!" Please. No. You don't understand. It is a severe mental condition. At this point you need meds, rest, and understanding.
Let me make a long story short. I had this one friend from college who INSISTED on seeing me. She came to the house 5 days after I got home. I LOCKED myself and the baby in the room, sat in the rocker and NEVER once left the room. I didn't want to see her. I, the social butterfly, couldn't understand it at the time, but I will tell you that I resented her "bugging" me like that. Of course, 6 months later, we were friends again. But that day was torture for me.
You don't know what she is going through, like I said. Just be there for her. Pray for her. She will come around. 8 days is too soon to bother with her if she is not ready. Having a baby is a truly precious and personal thing and all women have to deal with this event in their own way.
Women must understand this. Even friends.
Leave
Your last paragraph reveals a lot. You don't respect him and he doesn't respect you. You are not shallow. The two of you have grown apart and he is not the kind of man you want to spend your life with. Cut your losses and get out.
I leave it on
but no one eats it. It's kinda hard so I always thought it had a bone in it and probably would be difficult to take off. From now on I will probably remove it.
Leave now
It will be hard, but you can make it. I left after a nightmare of 10 years. I had 2 kids and not much money, but I got help from the state and survived by sheer will. The happiness of being free and the pride in becoming independent are well worth it. Good luck to you. Go get happy!
leave
You said you stayed with family out of state once before - can you take the kids and do that again? That might be the safest thing - then file for divorce, etc. You know him better than we do - so just trust your instincts and keep yourself and your kids safe - but you do need to get out of that marriage. . Take care and let us know how things are going.
She needs to leave well enough alone. He
might seem like her knight in shining army, but she has built a life with someone else. Obviously, she is not too unhappy to have stayed in her marriage for 25 years. Every once in a while I see my ex-fiance and my heart still gives a little extra thump. Then I stop and look at what I have. I have a wonderful husband of 30 years, 2 beautiful children, 1 adorable grandson. What more could I want. Yeah, the first guy was what some would call the love of my life. That doesn't lessen the love that I feel for my husband. The other man is now into his second marriage and, from all accounts, cheated his way through the first and they divorced after 20 years of marriage. As for my marriage, it's had its ups and downs just like any marriage, but, all in all, it has been very, very good and I wouldn't trade what I have for all the "thumps" in my heart. I could have married him and ended up being the one cheated on and divorced after 20 years. Thank God (quite literally) that I was spared that. 
You wish they would all leave?
because you have to transcribe ESLs and it is irritating, now you wish they would all leave? I didn't realize being an MT was so stressful for some. Glad I'm able to handle it. I must be a stronger person. Oh I love coming here! Makes me feel so much better about myself.
Why is it okay to leave this post up, but
delete all the other ones?
Well don't leave us hanging - let's have it!!! nm
If she wanted to leave she would have done so
It sounds like it's drama she is posting.
She is a grown woman and could have easily left him during church, while he was sleeping, at work, ect if she *really* wanted to leave.
Please tell me she didn't leave the dog...sm
with him! I'd be afraid for the dog's safety, as well as the dog being used to manipulate your daughter...
i did leave, but came back
I read your post, and just wanted to add to my post below that I did leave and just came back within the last 3 weeks. Things were pretty good at first, but now, even last night, he comes home from work at 2 am. The kids and I have been in bed for hours, and he starts a rant at 3 am about the milk being all gone that he bought the day before, and about my daughter using his shaving cream up in the bathtub. I just don't know where to go at this point. School is getting ready to start and my kids love this area. The only place I could go at this point is my mother's, that is where I went before. I don't know, I'm just venting and praying while I work. Thanks.
I did leave him once for about nine days...sm
After only 7 months of marriage I left and sort of went into hiding from him. He didn't have any idea where I was. When I finally contacted him he was totally distraught. He begged me to come back and made all kinds of promises to get counseling and go to anger management classes. Of course, the same week that I returned the "old" husband came right back.
One reason I really can't leave now is b/c we have total custody of my step-daughter and I am the only mother she has ever truly had. I don't feel like I can leave and desert her. There is no way I could ever get custody of her in our state. Thus, I keep on dragging along taking whatever is dished out my way.
I leave the radio on for them
We go away about once a month for a few days to visit my husband's mother who lives out of state, about a 4 hour drive away, and I always leave the radio on for our 3 cats just to sort of keep them company.
All the more reason why you should leave.
Do you have any friends or family that you can stay with, so you aren't alone? Not sure if it's him you are afraid of or the legal/financial stuff but maybe you would feel better if you talked to someone close to you about the situation.
Leave some $ on dresser and see what happens.
x
Fo Done: Is it right to leave a husband...
My answer to your question, in your case, is: No.
Maybe now you reject your husband so much because of this letter he wrote you, but I am sure that he regrets it and he wrote it in a state 'when he was out of his mind'. He apologized!
It is very seldom that men apologize.
Give him some t i m e to prove (oh my, I really think in this case it is prove, because it can be replaced by 'showing', but if the majority says it's proof, ok, then it's proof, I am confused now) that he wants to treat you better, give him another chance.
Don't forget, but forgive.
I am the only one who advises you to stay; I cannot believe this. All others give you their own 'horror stories', much worse than yours. Is this giving advice? Counseling?
Keep in mind, you can often give it a try, make it a little better, day by day, it takes only o n c e to leave and this is it, it's final.
Maybe if you stay, down the road, you will thank me for telling you to stay.
But......if he starts to physically abuse you, leave immediatley.
Now I am already expecting comments like....
'emotional abuse is even worse than physical abuse....etc....'
It depends on the grade of verbal abuse; some people regard even criticism as emotional and verbal abuse.
Can you not make it and just leave the
x
I did leave the seeds in...
maybe that's it. Strange stuff.
I also read you have to have a pressure-cooker for green beans and corn. I decided to blanch and freeze mine because I don't have the money right now for a pressure-cooker but that's on my list to watch the upcoming sales so I have one for next year.
Good luck to you too! Its a great way to save money after the start up costs and a much healthier alternative to store bought.
if you ask if you should leave on this board
The answer will be yes. No one will ever suggest that you do otherwise. This is the "you go girl, we hate men, leave the dirt bags, the kids will get over it" board.
I probably would tell hubs he had to leave
Nah, just kidding. The mama is trying to hide the kittens. The kittens will nurse for about 4 weeks and then they should be able to eat at least soft kitty food. Mama will start refusing to nurse when she wants the kitties to let her go, but about 4 weeks. I just had a baby kitten at my home today- the girl who does rescuing with me brought it by. She got at animal control and it was just a baby, about 4 or 5 weeks old.
Nope - I would leave it there until Christmas! nm
x
and where did that thought leave you? just curious. nm
nm
Next time use Crisco oil. Leave it on for at least
12 hours. Then use Joy dishwashing liquid as it will remove the greasiness. My eldest has enough hair for 4 people and this not only got rid of the lice with 1 treatment, her hair was really shiny too! :)
So if we leave a water bowl outside for them, will they
op
So, what happened ~ don't leave me hanging!
I think Logan was going to ask Loralei if he could marry Rory, but I'm more interested in what is going to happen with Luke and Loralei, even though he was such a jerk last season.
regarding hubby - leave with help of authority.
chick? What, is he 18 mentally? And, if he calls you that ONLY when nobody else can hear it, then you know that he knows what he is doing is wrong; stay away from him. Right now, focus on your kids, seriously. You have dependents; you are not dependent on others.
guess they decided to leave it up to everyone's
Let sleeping dogs lie... leave him
Just leave him, if he doesn't love you he can still love your kids long distance. I wouldn't have let him come back the first time. You need to think about yourself and your children, let sleeping dogs lie.
Do you leave messages for your pets?
Was away from home for a few days and decided to call and leave my cats a message on the answering machine. Was feeling a little silly afterwards but then thought hey, I bet lots of people do that. Anybody want to fess up and make me feel a little less goofy?
he'll find another because she said she wants to leave.
nm
If he were to leave his wife for you, then at some time in the
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