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Community living versus single-family dwelling

Posted By: wanting some insight please on 2007-07-13
In Reply to:

I was raised in a large single-family home, although it was on a cul-de-sac and there were no other girls my age in the neighborhhood.  That was okay for me at the time because I was a tomboy (and because that was decades ago!).  I didn't attend school with the kids on my street.  I went to a private school where my mom was a teacher.


Now, I am raising my granddaughter in an apartment community (I was already in an apartment when she came to live with me).  Because of my financial situation and the area in which I live and the schools I want her to attend, there is no possible way for me to purchase a home for the two of us.  My own kids lived in a single-family neighborhood before my divorce, then lived in a mobile home (double-wide trailer...common in these parts of the woods). 


I have so many conflicts about how children feel about the type of living arrangements they have, i.e., a _real house_ versus an apartment complex versus a mobile home community.  Personally, I would rather rent an apartment and not be responsible for reparis, but that means a constant turnover of other kids for my GD to relate to, which is also the situation in an apartment complex.  I don't want to buy a mobile home - which is what I qualify for grants, subsidies and low-interest loans in this area - so she can go to a better school.  Would this cause her to be more shame in her personal relationships with other kids at school than a mobile home community??


I would rather live in a townhome or condo, but that won't happen for some years to come.  Since I would be a first-time buyer, there are grants I would qualify for, just no financing because of the high cost of single-family homes and for TH/condos in the area where I want her to attend school.


Can anyone offer advice or experiences about growing up in a multi-family community such as an apartment complex...mobile homes (I know how my own kids felt about it now in hindsight)..versus a condo/townhome or single-family home?  I have some time to try to put things together before she starts school, so I am trying to decide what the best course of action for her sake.  If I decide to move, it will be to plant roots for the two of us for a long time, so I want to try to make the best decision possible.


Thanks for any input!




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Should smoking ONLY be allowed in private single family homes

March 14, 2007— Dozens packed the Belmont (California) city council chambers tonight for the first public airing of a new smoking ban proposal.


The law would give Belmont the toughest smoking ban in the nation — possibly in the world.


The crackdown aims to curb the harmful effects of second-hand smoke by preventing puffs not just in parks and around public buildings — but in private apartments and city streets as well. If the law passes, the only places left in Belmont to smoke would be single family homes and private cars.


Mayor Coralin Feierbach says the proposal was made to protect residents who suffer from health problems aggravated by smoke.The council didn't take action tonight. It's just the first of several meetings to discuss the proposal.


I'm telling you after years of living with the same family - they figure things out! sm
For example, he knows that if I am going somewhere with the kids, he probably can't go, but if he sees that I am alone and pick up my keys, he heads for the door with that look in his eyes! It's like he is trying his best to convey a telepathic message - "I want to go!!"
Anyone move from a single family home to mobile home? sm

I own and live in a house in a midwest city in a bad neighborhood (wasn't that bad 11 years ago).  I spent the day waiting for the plumber to come and jackhammer the foundation (slab house, no basement) to find a leaky pipe that is flooding my DD's bedroom. Last week, it was the electrician with quotes for costly repairs.


In the meantime, I've really been thinking about selling out and moving into a mobile home.  Has anyone done this before?  Is a mobile home in a decent park less of a hassle than a regular house?  I'm so tired of cutting the grass and spending $$ to fix things and tired of old flooring and cabinets, etc., that are just too costly to replace.  I'm single with no man to do these things for me and I can't afford a mortgage on a newer house in a good neighborhood.  Some of the pictures I've seen of the mobile homes look really nice and modern on the inside. 


Any advice and comments appreciated.  Thanks!


And you're still dwelling on her incorrect
pronunciation two years later? Wow, it must have really disturbed you.
Fibromyalgia versus the above MS
I know mine not as bad and really feel for the MS sufferer. I do not eat much sugar on a day to day basis, half teaspoon with first cup of coffee to get me started but not a real big protein eater either. I do not want to take a lot of ibuprofen if I can help although I did take 3 tablets upon waking this morning because of the sore all over feeling. Ibuprofen is really hard on your kidneys. I had pasta today that hubby fixed but will try on cutting back on the "whites." Is this something you heard or just something you tried? I am open to all suggestions what others have done to help their fibro. Again, thanks!
spanking versus ISS

Here is a quick question for all of you that think that the spanking from the school is okay and before any of you make any snap judgements, I was spanked as a child and when my children were smaller, they too were spanked(BY THEIR PARENTS)....Do you all realize that this school that uses these "swats" as punishment, would be on the phone immediately if they saw you or found out that you "swatted" that same child as punishment for deeds done wrong at home? Since nowadays they want to tell you what you can and cannot do as a parent to acutally parent your child( and then of course complain about said kids nowadays), that by alloing them to do something to your child that they would gladly report you for is quite ridiculous.


 


How long is this ISS.  For five tardies..it sure as heck shouldn't be a whole day or even a half day..it should be something realistic.  Yes, I do know what it is like to have to deal with school principals who are jerks, just remember that this is your child and not theirs and that it is your job to look out for them.


If you really feel that just to get this over with right now, you want to let them swat her, that is your choice but since she is so obviously not interested in ISS, I would definitely make sure that she and the school knows that this is a one time pass and yes, I too would either make her do some work around the house or take something away if only for the hassle.


 


Btw, five tardies in 4 or 5 months is really not that terrible IMO.  That is about one a month.  My goodness, we all assumed it was cause she talks anyone think that maybe the girl had to use the bathroom during her time of the month.  I would also find out when she was tardy and how tardy.  My son was given a tardy cause the bus was late getting him to school and I called and let them know that that is not acceptable in my book.  They had given several kids on his bus tardies and after several phone calls and a check with the bus company, the tardies were removed.  Yes, if my son had been chatting or something,  I would not have bothered to call, I would have just remind him that tardiness of his own making is not acceptable.


 


Best of luck. 


LG versus Motorola

If you had a choice between a Motorola cell phone or LG cell phone, which brand would you choose?  I had an LG and a Motorola several years ago and I really liked them both.  Everyone seems to prefer Motorola, although I hear a lot of complaints about battery life, etc.  I only renew my contract every couple of years so I need to make sure I get one I really like.  The one I have now is Samsung and I can't wait to trade it out.  The Motorola Razr V9m seems nice, but expensive, even with rebates and discounts.  If I know I'll like it, I wouldn't mind so much.  Everyone used to rave about the Razr phones and I know one of them has been discontinued now so I have to wonder how great they really were. 


Thanks!!!


Vista versus XP

Hi,


I am an MT looking to purchase a new computer, and it seems like unless you special order all the computers have Vista on them.  How is Vista compared to XP?  The companies I work for do support Vista, but I have heard more negative comments about Vista as opposed to good from people I know who use Vista who are not MTs.  I am hoping that this will be a smooth transition for me  as I am not that computer savvy.


Thanks!


a verb (versus a noun).............nm

pleasure versus happiness
Pleasure pertains to the senses.  For instance, it is pleasurable to eat something you like.  Happiness is a state of being which may or may not involve the senses, as in desires fulfilled.  For example, it was a pleasure to eat the chocolate cake.  I'd be happy if I could have the pleasure of doing it every day. 
Britney versus paparazzi . . .
http://www.bestweekever.tv/

Play Britney verus paparazzi for chuckle
condos versus hotel
Hi, the only tip I really have is check out the rates of the condos on the beach for weekly rentals.
I know they are probably high for summer time, but they offer full kitchens and more amenities than hotels usually... and you can save a lot of money by making your own meals instead of eating out all the time. The end of the summer we got a really good rate at Emerald Isle in North Carolina... I know that's far from you, I'm not sure if FL is as cheap... but you could look at Myrtle Beach too. Just think you're going to be paying probably at least 100.00 a night in a hotel... depending on how many nights you are staying you may just want to look into the condo idea, and if you need any help once you figure out where you want to go I'd be happy to i LOVE doing that kinda stuff :) have fun and good idea to start saving early
Cable tv versus dish

Can anybody give me their experiences with cable televison or dish, specifically Dish Network or DirectTV?


I am considering getting one of these but don't know which one to go with.  Thank you!


 


 


Guns versus doctors

Doctors


   (A) The number of physicians in the U.S. is 700,000.


   (B) Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year are 120,000.


   (C) Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171.


Statistics courtesy of U.S. Dept of Health Human Services



Now think about this:



Guns


  (A) The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000. (Yes, that's 80 million)


  (B) The number of accidental gun deaths per year, all age groups, is 1,500.


  (C) The number of accidental deaths per gun owner .000188.



Statistics courtesy of FBI



So, statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners.


Remember, 'Guns don't kill people, doctors do.'



FACT: NOT EVERYONE HAS A GUN, BUT ALMOST EVERYONE HAS AT LEAST ONE DOCTOR.



Please alert your friends to this alarming threat. We must ban doctors before this gets completely out of hand!!!!!


Out of concern for the public at large, I withheld the statistics on lawyers for fear the shock would cause people to panic and seek medical attention!


Clothesline versus dryer -- sm

Do you really save that much on the electric bill by hanging out your clothes? 


DH doesn't think so, but I'm inclined to disagree with him.  If you do save on your electric bill, how much? 


Hmm, hard water versus soft
Well might have thought about that but this was noticed as soon as the tile installed and has never been mopped so nothing like that. Heavens only knows where these little spots came from but definitely not water route.
Skinny versus Plump - who is happier?

Well I reckon this will start some fires...Hope I don't get burned. 


In your experience, ladies and gentlemen, who is happier?  Skinny people who are afraid of a calorie/carb/fat gram?  Or plump, curvy individuals? 


Having been skinny once upon a time and now having more curves than a country mountain road, I have to say I like myself so much better now that I weigh more.  It has been an experience, I tell you that much. 


So what do you all think? 


HC.


tubes tied versus Essure?
Anyone have either of these procedures done?  My husband was supposed to have a vasectomy before my IUD  "expired", that was 4 3/4 years ago and I have two more months until I have to have my IUD out.  I want something permanent and was going to get my tubes tied/cut but then I found out about the Essure procedure.  I'm still leaning towards the tubal but just wondering if anyone out there has any opinions.  Thanks so much!
He may be....but $300 pool versus a $30,000 truck, and a boat, etc., etc.? nm
x
Billy Mays versus the Shamwow guy.

Is it just me or how many others out their would like to throttle Billy Mays.  I am soooooo sick of him.  He's loud, obnoxious, and I'm getting tired of him thrusting his arms out in front every other second.  And please someone tell him to stop using the grecian formula.  It looks very unnatural.  I will never ever buy a product he advertises.


The shamwow guy though.  Now he's very enjoyable to watch and I will probably buy anything he advertises.  Just a nice switch from watching that obnoxious a$$ BM (gee his initials match what I want to have every time I see him).


Just wondered if anyone out there is as irked as me at Mr. Billy Mays.


I LOVE my community but having said that
you gotta know, I live in an association run neighborhood. There is none of the littering, loud noises, crappy yard keeping with beer bottles, used cars and the like in them, keep your home looking presentable and it is WONDERFUL. I called the fire dept 1 time only and that was because the next door neighbor decided he would have a cookout- now that would not have been so bad except his little woody area right behind him is the same woody area I share right next to him. In our county no outside burning of any kind and he could have lit his home up as well as mine. I did not confront, just had them come over and put his fire out. We are not allowed to let animals run loose in the community (my pets are all inside ones anyway) but it is just a blessing to live in such a place.
I think the reason the gay community has been
'flaunting' their preferences is because they feel it's time they had the same rights as heterosexuals, and there are certainly plenty of those making out on the beach, as well. For centuries the religious right has persecuted them. If you look closely, most religions are the root cause behind prejudice, persecution, and violence towards certain groups of people that are of a different mindset.

I happen to have lots of gay friends, and some are 'flaming', so to speak, and others you would never guess that they're gay. But ALL of them are extremely well educated, make tons more money than I do as an MT, pay taxes, support their communities, and in several communities in particular in my area, have taken run-down neighborhoods and turned them into the most desirable real-estate in the area. Some have kids, some have pets, some are artists/performers, others are doctors or lawyers, and they're totally nice people and loyal friends. So if they want to get into a lip-lock in public and I happen to see it, it doesn't bother me at all. Love is love.
Yes it is from a community college - thanks (nm)
x
If they are active in their community, then why
are you saying in quotations they are showing the children off? I think this speaks a lot for the way you are feeling towards them or her and it seems to me maybe she loves them and wants to let people know her grandchildren also. As a child I had to go spend time at my great aunt and uncle's house and they did not even have a television, only farm books, absolutely nothing for kids- we were not told we would do cookies. We went and said nothing- we were children but a little bit older than yours now. Why do you not send them a care gift for there, things they might enjoy doing on their own so their grandparents might also get time with them?
Try community college first sm
It was "not cool" for my kids to go to college locally, so we literally "wasted" good money on out-of-state high brow -- only to find unhappiness at missing the friends, girlfriends, etc. One ended up back in state at a good university at a much less drain on our budget and he is now a professor there. Can't tell these kids much about smart moves if they are hell bent on going away from home and driving your bank accounts to the limit. Community 2-year colleges locally are wonderful and most good universities will accept these credits, it's a great way not only to save money but to let them get their feet wet and get a lot of experience with what they are actually really talented at. Can't tell them much, but you can try, it will save you a lot of heartache and less drain on your budget for the "real stuff" such as grad school, etc., which is almost imperative today to compete. Good luck!!!
My husband and I were deciding on a tubal versus a vasectomy....
after reading these responses about a tubal I told him he has to get a vasectomy....thanks for making my decision easier--I honestly never knew about menstrual issues afterwards...
Family is great but I am never back in my hometown where family is... So I always have extended fami
You can always pick your friends your stuck with your family. An Xmas for me is where my husband and kids come home to. It is what you make it!
My husband does community plays....sm
when the opportunity arises and helps me with the kids choir at church. Some people are just loners, meaning they really don't want to do anything other than work and home. My stepdaughter is that way and I also wish she'd take an interest in outside things, but that's just her personality.

He is great around the house - we split the house chores and pitch in together to get whatever needs to be done, done.
The Christian community has always thought they were better than everyone else.
Religion has often been the catalyst of wars...hence the one we are in now.
My community demands that we keep our yard
free of the bugs and weeds and we were infested with grubs this past year. We have spent a lot of time trying to rid our yard because they do so much damage. The management came by while this was going on and sent letter that we try to remedy the problem. I have to use these, sorry but I do like a nice lawn.
My community does not allow yard burials but
i have like a flower place in my back, no one can see from either side and if my pet dies, would definitely bury there and then have some flowers also there. No one can see into the back of my place, wooden area between me and the others!!
Agree about stairs. Think I'd like a community where we could
s
Come to my community in Pembroke Pines.
xx
Community Yard Sale
I posted earlier on here about ideas about having yard sale. Someone said for early birds to put sign out saying everything before 8 double the price. Well, that sounds good but in reality one of the first about 7:30 this morning before all set out got indignant that I would have a sign out like that, stating she had been to sooo many sales before and did I want to sell or not? Not was basically my answer. I did this because I had never been involved in my community yard sale but it was so much effort and very little return. I even had a Hispanic ask me would I mind if he used the bathroom in my backyard- told him someone back there and besides that my neighbors would mind. My community has high end homes and besides that, there are laws against things like that. Oh well, live and learn.
We buy presents for kids in a community
nm
I asked for community service when he took off
A month ago he took off and was wandering around and I called him in as a runaway. I asked for community service then, which they refused to give him, and I was also told that I have to pay for him to participate in community service.

The store said they don't care what the court system decides, their 100 has nothing to do with whatever punishment he gets legally.

He has been grounded so long that I can't remember him being ungrounded at this point. He has lost all the "fun" in his life.

One of my old bosses called and asked if she could pay him to make some desserts for her birthday party so he'll be using that money to pay the store some.
I also know of one religion that helps out community
they actually pay back some in taxes to communities where there is a volunteer fire department, etc., precisely because they benefit from such services.
Dailystrength.com....an online community..sm

There's a ton of different support groups,etc.  It's a great place to make freinds, relieve stress, talk, etc.  I'm on there a lot and it's really a great place.  No one bashes you, everyone understands, you meet people in the same boat, etc.  Give it a try.


You're definitely not alone.  I hope things work out for you and I wish there was something I could do to help.  It's so hard nowadays. I have to take antidepressants or I wouldn't get out of bed. It really sucks.  What I can do, though, is be a shoulder to lean on.  Sometimes the friends you can't "see" are the easiest to talk to.  I know it is for me.


Does your community have a dog obedience class? -(sm)-
Not only do you get great training for yourself and your dog, but it's also FUN for you and your dog. You can meet lots of nice people (and dogs) that way, too.

When I was a teenager, my friend and I took our dogs to a class that was held in our local park every Saturday, and we had a blast.

Another option, with a different approach, is watching tapes by the 'Dog Whisperer'. My sister adopted a puppy from the pound that got VERY big, VERY fast! She adopted the Dog-Whisperer's 'be the leader of the pack' approach, which has worked very well for her dog. (It's a cross between a golden retriever and an alaskan malamute.... BIG doggie!)

Most obedience classes use a choke-chain (NOT a spike-collar!) and a 6-foot regulation leather leash as training aids. My sister used a little dog-halter that goes on the head called a 'Gentle Leader'. I was amazed at how well her dog learned to walk at her side and not pull. She has now graduated to just a regular collar, but my sister carries the Gentle Leader with her for those occasional times then her dog gets a little excited and needs a reminder.

Either way is an enjoyable, easy and most of all, humane way of leash-training a dog, and the results were excellent. I was particularly impressed by how my sister's dog turned out. Some of her dogs in the past have been pretty wild and crazy - this dog is the sweetest, most well-behaved dog I've ever met. She can take that dog ANYWHERE: The dog park, downtown on crowded sidewalks, to work (has her own business), parades, you name it.

It might be harder and take longer to get results with an older dog with already-established naughty habits, but I think that with time, patience and persistence, you can make a lot of positive changes.

Good luck! :)
Summer. Friends or family? Family. Tired or Awake?
x
Exactly, a very large *gated* community in my state
was pretty much taken over by mostly gang/drug dealer types! I guess they want to keep the cops out ; ) lol
Having community wide yard sale and
had it not been for this post I probably would not have checked my bracelets out. This was posted last week but I thought some that replied might be interested to know it was exactly like they thought, more expensive than just the average and collectable.
We also had a community yard sale this weekend.
I've done this three other times in the 23 years that I've lived here. Every time was way more hassle then it was worth. For me, the point of my yard sales has never been to make cash. Rather, I'm just trying to clear clutter. And people who come to a yard sale can be soooo rude and pushy. They'll want to haggle over something that costs 50 cents! This time, I put everything out and told my home-from-college son to run the sale. He could keep the money. It was worth it to him, but I won't ever do it again. I spent so much time getting the stuff together and getting it ready and tagged. I could have done something more enjoyable with my precious time!

Next time I want to clear clutter, I'm tossing and donating. No more selling!
...nm up there. Very sad. And we live in an older, settled community,
s
Yes he will. The Muslim community will close ranks on this man.
They will call it an "Honor-Killing." What it is, is out and out murder. But Hussan will spend but minimal time incarcerated. The Muslim's have our country cowed. CAIR, AIPAC, and all the other Muslim alphabet soup groups will close ranks to defend him against an "evil and corrupt" legal system. He will have a defense fund the likes of which most people will never see.

They will call people who want to try him for this crime islamophobes or worse. They will threaten retribution against the judge, law enforcement people, whoever is involved in this case. Self-preservation is a great motivator.

Hopefully the legal system will do what it is supposed to do...put guilty people in jail. But we will have to see how the wind blows.

IMHO, the wind blows towards Mecca and the Muslims.
I once had a psycho boss at a small community -
hospital I worked at. Our transcription dept. consisted of just 3 of us, and we sat in a far corner of the medical records dept., next to the microfilm guy. The boss ('P'), and I were the only full-time MTs; the other MT only worked half-days, and she and I shared a desk. She worked from 8-12:30, I worked from 1-9:30 pm. This boss gave me the longest, most ridiculous oral 'transcription' test I've ever taken anywhere. Oddly, no typing test. So, I was hired.

The other MT told me no matter what you do, don't do more work than P, or she'll get insanely jealous. ?? So one fateful day, I made the mistake of typing more reports than she did. She changed to several different shades of red and purple, and I never saw anyone's lips get so thin in my entire life! Her mouth became just a pencil-thin straight line. After that day, she made my life a living he11. Always picking apart my work, trying to say I'd skipped out of work early one day and missed the life-flight helicopter bringing patients to the ER. (No, I was there, and I typed their H&P's).

She also had a running feud going on with the entire MR department, and instructed me that I wasn't allowed to speak with ANY of them. I was friends with the microfilm guy, and others in MR, and so I very politely told her that although I wouldn't chit-chat with them while I was WORKING, that what I did on my breaks and my own time was my own business, and that no one tells me who I may or may not associate with.

Would you believe this b___ch would actually feign leaving work for the day (her shift ended at 5 pm), and then would sneak back anywhere from 15 minutes to 5 hours later, just to peep in the window from outside and see if I was talking to anyone? She was a real piece of work, that one.

I eventually took another job (with a service that she occasionally sent our overflow work to). The new boss didn't want me telling her where I was going (which I wouldn't have, anyway - she was a very vindictive person), so when she asked where I was going to, I made up a doctor in the city - an impossible to pronounce, Chinese-sounding name. I told her it sounded sort of like 'Chiaong', but I had no idea how it was spelled. I also told her that because of his very thick accent, he was going to pay me twice what I was making at the hospital. Boy, did she ever turn dark RED when I told her THAT!

A few days later, my other co-worker (obviously on instructions from P), was trying to squeeze the name and address of the new 'doctor' out of me, but I just told her I knew where the building was, but that I'd walked there from an underground parking lot and didn't know the address, just that it was on the 9th floor. I just KNEW P. wanted to find this doctor and try to get the job for herself (which I learned is how she got the MT job at that hospital). So, I'm sure she spent hours perusing the downtown phone book, looking for Dr. 'Chiaong'!!! I also wouldn't have put it past her to go off in search of this mythical medical building I made up.

Sometimes mean people can be fun to jerk around. ;)
Big difference between family values and family jewels, eh? lol
LOL. I love this show. I think Gene and Shannon and her sister are a riot! What characters. It really is amazing to me the kids seem so laid back and so normal. They seem like great kids.
Does your family still do the early Sunday dinner w/family?
s
Doesn't sound like my idea of a great community when your neighbor hears you whisper
I'm with you.  Love the country.  Most of those homeowner's associations (at least here in Texas) are power mongers.
SIL family, us and another family snacked,played
x
I'm with you 50 and single..
I too have sworn off relationships and very happy being on my own. I cannot and will not go through it again. Both my ex's were two peas in a pod. Unfortunately, I seem to attract the same type of people. At 52, I am quite happy being alone but also having a great circle of friends. It far outweighs being unhappy, angry, always hoping things would get better when they never did.