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Cheating spouses

Posted By: Brandy on 2008-09-18
In Reply to: I truly believe in the - same here

I look at it this way, when you cheat on your spouse in the eyes of the Lord your marriage is dissolved anyhow. If my spouse ever cheated on me, I would definitely not stick it out for companionship or otherwise. It would just not be worth it to me because there would be massive trust issues from that point on. Just not worth it. For goodness sake, I would buy a dog before I would stay in a loveless marriage always wondering if my spouse was getting ready to cheat again!


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Both my brother and sister met their spouses this way.
Couldn't tell you the names of the sites they used though. Seems like a good way to meet people these days!
Thanks everyone.....No he is not cheating
Last time he said he was "in love" with someone else, but she had her own family and stayed comitted to it, and he came back to me and has had nothing to do with her since. There is no one else this time, I am sure of that. I am almost willing to pretend that conversation never took place and if he is willing to stay with me for the kids, then that should be enough. But I don't want him unhappy, I still love him, and I suppose I deserve to be with someone I love too, but my kids and their happiness come first and foremost, before mine. I could be happy with him as long as he was content. I don't want him to stay though if he is just going to be an angry, unhappy person. I have thought of marriage counselling, he might be willing to try it. I am willing to try anything at this point.
Those cheating men
Over the last couple of weeks and especially in the last week 2 different families that have been much in the news, 1 family on a TV program and another family in government. Both husbands have been seen, caught, accused of having a child outside his marriage, another husband supposedly was going with a young teacher. Both of these men's spouses have taken their husband's sides, defending them, maybe even looking inward and seeing if possibly something the woman did was wrong. How would you react if your husband or significant other. Would you defend, get mad, get even or what?
Cheating men
Dateline tonight had a VERY interesting show on regarding this subject and people said as well it could be genetic - hmmmmm
Actually when my dad was cheating on my mom...sm
He has always left his cell phone laying around when home. Then she noticed he started keeping it in his pocket at all times. He even took it to the bathroom to get a shower. Or she actually found it hidden under a pile of dirty clothes one time when he was in the shower. He didn't want her to pick it up and see the calls on there.
What makes you think he's cheating on you?
p
Kind of cheating
At work our user names are the first four letters of our last name and the first two of our first name. Mine came out Horski which I kind of liked and on the boards, no one knows my gender right away too. I'm female by the way! You trying to pick something?
Cheating Spouse?
Have you ever caught your spouse cheating? If so, how did you catch him/her?
cheating spouse
I worked day shift and he worked 3-11 so for a few years we would hardly see each other at all. First, let me say that my husband is kind of messy. I would notice that when I came home from work, my home was in the same order that I left it in the morning. Even the curtains had not been opened yet. There were no dirty dishes. There was no sign anybody had been home all day. I would ask and he would always have an excuse..went to play golf before work, went to a ball game, had lunch with the guys, etc.

Then a woman started calling the house in the evening asking for my husband. I would say he was at work, ask if I could take a message and she would say no and hang up. She would call about 3 to 4 evenings a week. I asked my husband who she was and he would say he didn't know.

Then, HER husband called and left a message on our machine one day while we were out. He didn't say any names, just said stay away from my wife or I'm going to come over and beat your a$$. I asked who was that and my husband said he didn't know.

This all happened over about 4 months when he was offered a transfer with work out of state and we took it. He never admitted having an affair but I know he did. That was 16 years ago. We are still together and before everyone flames me, I will tell you that the man has paid dearly for that little fling. We've never discussed it because how can you discuss something he won't admit to? He didn't leave the house for years without taking 1 or all the kids with him, even to the grocery store or the post office. He never got to do anything he wanted to do, no more boys night out, no more golf weekends, etc. It got to the point where I was feeling sorry for him but he never said a word.

Now that we're in our 50s, I wish someone would take him so he'd leave me alone!
hubby cheating
I had a friend years ago who hid in the back of her hub's camper-cover pickup when she suspected he was going to see the other woman one night. He had a little *bed* in truck. She caught them and filed for divorce, later remarried and happy as a lark for 30 years now.
So corporate cheating is fine

You said - However, it does NOT justify lying, cheating, stealing insurance dollars and benefits just because you don't like it.


What do you call it when someone pays their premiums for years, they are told they are covered, then the insurance company decides they don't have to pay?  Sounds like what you just described above.  But it happens every day, and its supposedly OK, because its business,  I used to do medical billing, outrageous how many claims were denied because the ordering physician didn't do a precert, the insurance company decided it was unneccessary, or some other little loophole.  The providers didn't get paid, the patient ended up in collections,,,and IMO the patient was lied to, stolen from, and cheated out of his insurance dollars and benefits.


BTW, I do make my own money.  I'm just not too pleased at handing large chunks of it to an insurance company, knowing they will diligently seek reasons to deny a claim, even if I play by all their ever changing rules and memorize my policy.  And that includes the entire insurance industry, be it medical, LTD, life, auto, or homeowners insurance.


Cheating spouse/boyfriend, etc.
Many years ago I was married to a cheating spouse. I was pregnant with our second child when he took it upon himself to cheat with an underage girl in the back of our brand new station wagon. Well, I learned about this when a paternity suit came up with his name on it. Apparently he was so dumb that he did not know the girl had a boyfriend and being the sucker that he was he did not know that they would pin the paternity on him, and get money from him. Too bad it wasn't in this day and time because he would have been in jail because she was only 17, and he was in his 30s. This was only 1 in a string of women that I found out after the fact, and even contracted an STD when I was pregnant!! I also suffered spousal abuse, and have the scars to prove it. After 5 years of this I got out,and the only reason I stayed was for the children, but that was a huge mistake on my part. Now, whenever, I hear or see this on a program it makes me furious that these men think this behavior is okay. It is never okay and leaves many people, including children, to suffer much heartache.
Good for Kate! Who needs a cheating man.
x
I understand the problem with cheating by using phones
and my children do carry the cells to school but keep them turned off and in their locker....which kinda defeats the purpose of being able to call in an emergency but I do know the problem it can become. The kids are also not supposed to have them on field trips that are just for the day (they are allowed to take them on overnight trips). Well, my son was on a high school field trip to VA Tech on Apr. 16. If hadn't had a teacher that allowed them (just don't abuse them) we would not have known for hours that he was okay. I went to the middle school that very afternoon and spoke to the principal about my DD taking her phone on a field trip and the principal said that it would be okay. That's good, cuz she was taking it no matter what.
If I knew there was a history of cheating on former wives,
then my opinion would be different. I think that once cheating occurs, it is more likely to be repeated in future relationships. Not saying that this is your case, but it would worry me.
My rant: I agree cheating on one's spouse is never SM
acceptable. The one thing that REALLY bothers me, is that men claim that they have to cheat, since sex with their wives is no longer exciting and that their wife won't do what paid companions will and my thought is always the same "Did you ASK her?". If they ask nicely, I'm sure loving wives would be more than willing to comply. Within reason, of course.
How far would you go (or would you) to find out if your husband/lover was cheating?
I am married now and never even think of his cheating or even worry about it, just do not have a feeling like that but in the past married to a real dog. I then checked his pockets, his shirt collars (for lipstick, makeup), phone calls and on and on. How far would you go and what have you found?
Strange question. I punched my ex when I found out what a cheating SOB he was. SM
I personally haven't been punched in the face since I was 20ish and I'd like to keep it that way.