Beware of overdraft protection on debit card though
Posted By: bad news on 2007-04-18
In Reply to: Overdraft Protection - LinK
My son moved into his own place, actually sharing a house with a friend. He got his first checking account and was actually doing well with it. He actually didn't get any checks and just used his debit card. He and his roommate decided to get cable. Evidently my son signed up for it to be automatically deducted from his checking account, which he says he did not know. That was his responsibility and his mistake obviously. He should have known when they were going to ping his account. Unfortunately, he did not. They deducted for his cable bill, and then he thought he had more in his checking account and used his check card about 12 times in a 2 day time period.. like, for 1 soda for $1.49, or $5.00 of gas. All of these charges were allowed and were put through but then were charged a $30 fee for each. Finally on the third day, the card was declined and that same day he received the notice of overdrafts in the mail. Supposedly this is a service the bank offers, which I don't understand, in that they will process your debit like an overdraft and put it through, but then charge you. I totally understand how that is a good thing for checks, as you avoid getting the check charges and bounced checks through the merchants, but when you are using a debit card, shouldn't it just decline it if you don't have enough money in there? It would have tipped him off right away that there was a problem with his account, instead of racking up over $300 in overdraft fees. We've contacted the bank several times, but they will not budge saying that this is "service" they provide and it was explained in the paperwork he received when he opened his account.
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Overdraft Protection
I'm sorry to hear about your money troubles. That's happened to us before. The lifesaver for us is the overdraft that we have for our account. Of course you have to pay off the overdraft, but we never have to worry about bouncing checks.
Overdraft and Debit Cards
Thank goodness at the bank we use, debit card deductions are the same as checks (I rarely use checks). The overdraft applies to those as well. Luckily I don't use the overdraft often, just glad to know it's there is I need it.
all of them that I can because my debit card
so I rack up the points paying my bills online with it!!
Used my debit card for everything - sm
but spent too much, about $800 in all. Got overcharged on my gift cards, bought 2 at $50, but got charged for 5.....just got my money back from the offending store on that one, which was quite a fight. They would not even listen to me, filed papers with the bank and sent the company a nasty detailed email to their complaint department, which believe it or not did the trick. My bank did not have to do anything in the end, just kept me informed on what the store was doing, took a week to get it resolved, but got my $164.85 back.
Is there a debit card available where a bank
?
I use a prepaid debit card. sm
My pay is deposited right on the card. I can also load the card, but it costs $3.50. Its called Real Money. There is a $5.95 month fee though. To take money out of an ATM costs $1.50 plus whatever the ATM charges. It also has a bill payer with a lot of merchants already programmed in so you can pay bills online. The only problem I have with it is that they'll put holds on funds and give the merchant 15 days to claim it before releasing it like if something gets charged twice for instance. One time I tried to buy a money order at the Wal-Mart money order machine and it never gave me my money order but had charged my card. It was for over $200 and they were going to hold it for 30 days! I had to have Wal-Mart fax a release to them. That was a pain. You have to be careful with some of this prepaid debit cards and read the fine print because some of them have a lot of hidden fees.
If it was a VISA check/debit card she will get -sm
her money back, don't know about other "brands" though. Someone stole my number from a BJs database and charged about $800 worth of stuff in another state quite far from us, of course the money came right out of our checking account. I went to the bank, filled out a zillion forms and had the all of the money back in 24 hours in a new checking account. That is total bull that she won't get the money back, the bank should guarantee it. One of you should definitely look into it and make some noise so she gets ever penny back.
huh? I have a debit card, not a visa, mastercharge....
and I cannot charge on it - I can only get $$ off it - and use it anywhere they accept debit cards (Walgreen's, etc) but not in dept. stores - only to DEBIT my card - never to charge. The bank always tries to solicit me with a Visa or Mastercharge debit card and I constantly cut them up and send them back to the bank - I don't want another VISA card (already have three, two of which I never use) and so I ONLY want a bank debit card...WAMU is the bank
This is the reason I refuse to carry a debit card....sm
Most retailers do not require you to use a PIN and there is no security on these things. I've heard of many people like your daughter getting stuck without money for a few days while waiting for the bank to credit them back. Another problem that happens sometimes, including happening to my husband when we were dating was that when we ate out the waiter made an error on the charges to the debit card - charging $440.00 instead of $44.00. The waiter immediately ran the credit and the manager apologized, but the bank still took out the $440 until they received the written confirmation from the restaurant's bank of the error. Fortunately he had the money in his account to cover this error but other people would bounce checks over it. The same thing happened to my mom - an error was made and she was without as much as she should have had for the 3 business days it took to credit her back.
Your daughter should immediately talk to the police department about the fraud and the bank. Good luck straightening it out!
Can You Get Overdraft on your account
This has more than saved my life. It's well worth it just for piece of mind in case something should happen and you absoutely have to use your checking account and you're a little short. I hope that that one penny won't screw you up. That would stink. Maybe the bank would be forgiving.
Have U renogiated credit card debt when minimum payment got too high? Do they take your card away,
s
Credit Card Reform Can Cost Good Card Users
Part of article:
Credit cards have long been a very good deal for people who pay their bills on time and in full. Even as card companies imposed punitive fees and penalties on those late with their payments, the best customers racked up cash-back rewards, frequent-flier miles and other perks in recent years.
Now Congress is moving to limit the penalties on riskier borrowers, who have become a prime source of billions of dollars in fee revenue for the industry. And to make up for lost income, the card companies are going after those people with sterling credit.
We pay off our balance every month. If they do this (punish those who have sterling credit) Ridiculous!! I'll stop using my CC and pay by cash or check.
So much for reform.
IMO a card would not be out of order at all. Except a sympathy card, of course.
I totally agree a sympathy card wouldn't quite be the thing, but it sounded to me that the original poster of that idea didn't mean a sympathy card like one for death. I think sympathy in the sense of "hey, you had a rough time of it with this birth, and maybe things haven't been the way you imagined, but know that I'm thinking of you and I'm here if and when you need me."
I got PPD when my breastfeeding relationship didn't go right, following a birth plan that went seriously awry, and the reality of a fussy, picky baby instead of the happy, sleeping one that I had imagined.
I *did* spend a lot of time on the phone, but then everybody's different. I would have loved to get a cheerful card from a friend, however. Does anybody NOT like a card?
My antivirus protection is about to run out. Anybody got
any suggestions as to which are the best. I have Norton antivirus now.
I have inside and out protection....
3 cats are inside and 1 is outside (neighbors) Never a mouse or rat problem here.
Buyer beware!
I've had several experiences on e-bay, one as seller and others as buyer. I should have known better, but sent a money order for a piece of software to the UK and never received it. The price was too good to be true--about $20.00, so that should have been a tip-off, also. This seller also had good feedback record. When I tried to follow up, the seller was no longer a part of e-bay. The other buying experience I had was nerve-wracking; had to follow up with the seller of a C-phone several times before shipment. As a seller, I researched info on an old vase (Roseville) and listed it at a fair price. Other sellers had a similar vase for $1.00--so I gave up. Just my experiences! Glad to know others have had better luck!
Beware. There have been studies that
what you order is not necessarily what you get.
FIREWALL/VIRUS PROTECTION
I am going to check out this AVG; First I used Norton, then Norton changed and screwed up my computer (years ago) and then I used McAfee which worked well. Then McAfee changed and I got viruses. Then I got some Vaio computers with Norton. Norton was good. Then, Norton was terrible and five viruses later I changed to the one that comes with my internet service and is free which found 11 viruses and Spyware stuff that Norton could not "see". Then that failed and I got some viruses and now I finally got the unintall program for the free one (which took a week to get for some reason) and I am shopping too. What I want is one that works all the time, easy to use, and especially one that has English speaking 24/7/365 help available without 50- 100.00 dollar fees just to ask a question about the software for which I have already paid good money that is not functioning! This AVG, does it have English speaking persons? Do they help you for free or a small fee?
Don't use your debit cards
I had a problem with fraud on my account through them. Surely they have fixed it by now, as this was last year and the year before (yes 2 separate occurrences, both at xmas time). So I would not suggest using any cards there but cash only.
I do agree that it seems to be a great idea for teens. Their prices are great and our location has always been helpful with advise, returns, etc.
Another good idea I have found for teenagers is a gift card for restaurants or gas stations. It helps their parents a bit and if they have a girlfriend/boyfriend places like AppleBees or Red Lobster are nice so that they can go on a nice date and not have to worry about $30 for the bill. Even with a part-time job that's a lot of money for a teenager! :) My nephew actually requests it.
It is called Bankruptcy Protection for this reason
I'd make a personal appearance at the bank with a letter from your attorney if the money is desperately needed.
Settlement offers - beware
Just be aware that if they do a settlement offer of $3500 on the $7000 then you will have to include any portion that they write off as "income" on your taxes and they will send you a 1099 C that will show the amount that they cancelled and will report it to the IRS. If they already have a judgment against you, why are they taking you to court? I thought that once a judgment was placed that was it, of course if the judgment was placed prior to you making payments and then you began making payments again, that might require another judgment. And of course that begins the start of the cycle of the 7 years before they will write off the entire amount and with the new laws that could also generate a 1099 C requiring you to report that as income. Of course the amount of taxes you pay on the "income" is a lot less than the amount of the debt but it is still something to think about. Good luck.
I just need to VENT and see what you all think...Beware...this is long...sm
I have tried twice to tell this story but deleted it both times because the story is just too long so I will be as short as I can.
I have a bunch of ROTTEN TO THE CORE sisters. My sisters are just about the worst people I have ever met in my whole 43 years on this planet. There is one who is especially bad and I just told my other sister that if she ever dies, to please not call me as I won't come to any wake or funeral for her because I HATE her guts. I come from a very large family with 5 sisters and 1 brother with my brother being the oldest. He is not involved. He sort of "left" the family years ago because he couldn't take the bulls**t of my sisters anymore. They did terrible things to him after his divorce. We rarely see him now. I am considered a scumbag and a loser because my husband and I don't make a lot of money. We don't own a home. We don't have gorgeous cars. We can't give our 3 children everything they want and we can only give them small amounts of what they actually need, but we do try. We love our children with everything in our souls. They have made fun of me and my husband and insulted us to our faces. My husband and I have a difficult marriage as he is tough to get along with so they hate my husband's guts. My sisters have all gone out to dinner without inviting me. I have found out because of someone's slip of the tongue. They have made threats and sent rumors flying throughout the family, without me knowing, about calling DCYF on me. I heard that one too from a slip of the tongue. I cried for 2 hours in the shower that day. They talk about everyone and I mean everyone badly. They have a well known reputation in a couple of our towns here for being mean horrible girls. They are about as fake and phony as a person can get. Sweet and all smiles to your face and when you turn around, they stick that knife in as far as they can get it in. They have what they have in their lives because of what someone has given them. My sister had her property given to her by her in-laws. It is worth about $1,000,000. My other sister had land given to her by her husband's family so they could build their house and then his parents used to come over with BIG fat checks "to lessen their mortage burden" so now they owe almost nothing on their $500,000 house. They think they are fabulous people. They think they are the cat's meow. In the past years when we were all talking and I would be invited to a holiday, I was not spoken to at all the whole time I was there. I am a venter and I always have been so if my husband and I are fighting, I will always go to my older sister (one up from me) and vent and vent until I can't talk anymore because I just get so angry. She gets on the phone the second I leave and tells every person in my family what is going on. They in turn judge me and my husband, make their threats, and so on. This is also happening to my oldest sister and her partner (she is in a gay relationship but was always dating a man and was married twice) and my sister's daughter and her family. The three of us, me, my sister and her partner, and my sister's daughter and her family, talk. We get along well. We are happy with each other. We don't judge each other. Whatever happens in each other lives, we just accept it and don't judge each other because we realize that each other has their own life and they will deal with whatever comes on their own with their own family in their own way. I now attend holidays at my sister's daughter's home. I don't leave her house after a holiday feeling lonely or sad or angry because no one would speak to me. I don't feel judged. The sisters (I like to call them the Witches of Eastwick) all attend holidays with each other up at my sister's husband's family's cabin in the mountains. The three of us are not invited. My older sister has a son. Several yeas ago, my sister and her partner had a terrible fight with him. He went to the witches and told them a bunch of lies and now they have pretty much shunned her and her daughter and me too because we still talk to her. I have a sister, who is involved in all of this, that I speak to on a regular basis. She is close to my kids or at least my oldest son. She pretty much ignores my other two children and they tell me, It's alright mommy, we know Aunty Becky hates us." She is the one who has spread rumors about me in the family trying to get everyone to call DCYF on me. I heard this too by a slip of the tongue from another sister a few years back. I tend to be a forgiving person so I quietly forgave her for this without her ever knowing that I knew what she was trying to do. Now that they are all inviited to the holidays up to my sister's cabin up north, this rotten sister of mine (the one closest to my son) has 3 cats that are fed twice a day. They are extremely fat just like her. These holiday trips up north are usually kept quiet and I only know about it the day before they are leaving to go, which is when she inevitably asks me to come feed her f******g cats. This is how I know that a big party is going on up at the cabin and once again only the chosen selected few are going. This is usually for 3 or 4 days and they get fed twice a day so I have to go to her house twice a day. Sometimes I have to give them medication and the last time she asked me, I even had to soak her sick cat's feet in medicine. She lives about 20 minutes away from me. This girl would NEVER, NEVER, EVER do this for me. My husband and I took our children on a cruise 3 years ago and we have a cat and I never asked her to do this for me as I know she would have laughed in my face. I have been feeding her cats for years now when she goes away. Keep in mind though that she was in the select chosen few to be invited up to the cabin. I was not as I am considered trash in the family. I am SICK AND TIRED of feeding this girl's cats so SHE can go up north to have fun with the family on the holidays. My sister who invites everyone to go is a mean, horrible, sadistic, vicious, backstabbing wretched b***h. No one will say anything to her like, "Gee Pat, where is everyone else? Didn't you invite this one, and this one, and this one?" They could care less. All they know is that THEY were invited.
Anyway, I am sorry this is so long. I can't take my sisters anymore. I have been thinking of this all day all weekend long. I am really to the point where I just don't want to see them ever again. I am going to tell my fat a** b***h sister to fnd another way to get her cats fed because I'm not doing it anymore!! She is just using me and believe me when I tell you, she enjoys it. She is very diabolical. She loves it that I am not invited and she and her husband are. She even questions me and counts the cat food cans to make sure that I came on all of the days they were gone. These people have balls of brass and I have had ENOUGH. I am just sitting and waiting patiently for the next time she says, "Oh, we're going up north for a few days. Can you come and feed the cats?" I just can't wait to see the look on her face when I simply say, "No. I can't. I will never feed your cats again! Find some other sucker to do it!"
I believe that they are severely narcissistic people and this is nothing to take lightly. These types of people are very destructive. Do any of you have family members like this and what do you do about them? How do you stop them from making you feel sad, lonely, excluded and less than you are or deserve? I think it is time for me to cut all ties with them. I just can't take their crap anymore and I do think I would be much, much happier and calmer.
Most debit cards can also be used as a charge
card. If you use it as a charge card you do not have to put in a PIN number. What happened to your daughter sounds like someone from Bobs took the actual account number information. I'd confront Bobs mgmt.
File for bankruptcy protection if you have equity in your home
dd
Sentinel. Heartworm and flea protection in one pill. nm
x
Order of protection, change locks and be prepared
x
Cancel the ID theft protection on your credit cards.
If you didn’t pay for it, you’re not liable for it.
Well, now it's my turn to tell my story...(Beware..this is long)
Well, I just don't know where to begin. I was 26 years old when I met and married my husband. It will be 14 years ago this August. I was a platinum blond, Swedish, 26-year-old, voluptuous virgin waiting for my prince to come. I had never dated because I was too fearful and shy. My mother always told me that my prince was coming. She just didn't tell me he was going to be the prince of darkness. It has been a nightmare, although he says it has been great with only a few bumps along the way. He is abusive in every way including verbally, mentally, emotionally, some physical although very little (not an excuse, just telling it the way it is), what I feel is sexual abuse with me but not the children, but the worst by far is his financial abuse. He has told me many, many times, "Who do you think YOU are? What do you think...that you're _____ is golden? I can find a dozen more women like you." I have three children, now ages 14, 13, and 11. 14-year-old has ADHD and oppositional defiant disorder. My husband is just like this although he has never been diagnosed and never would be because in his own words, "I am perfect just like God made me. There is nothing wrong with me. The problem here is you." My credit is down the toilet. Credit score is about 500. His is 800. Through the years, when the children were babies I had to feed them dry cereal with a cup of water because he wouldn't buy any milk or any groceries. One very hot night in the summer, I had to feed them generic hot dogs and pink beans, which were some kind of bean that slithered out of the can in a gelatinous material. The kids were were dry heaving at the table. One day when I was about 8 months pregnant with my last child, he came up to me and said, "Well, I've made a decision." I said what's your decision. He said (very matter of fact), "I'm not going to pay for you anymore. I won't help you pay your bills, I won't buy you clothes, I won't buy you anything. If you want something, get off your f______fat a__ and get a job." I had a 6-month-old and a 1 1/2-year-old and 8 months pregnant with the third one. What!! Get a job!! Are you crazy?? He said, "Oh well." Famous last words. That is all I ever hear. He has ripped out phone lines, denied us food and clothing. We have two cars. He used to hide the car I would drive around the neighborhood so I couldn't have access to a car. He would even take the carseats. One time when I was pregnant, I had no money so my girlfriend needed a babysitter a few hours a week. She lives in Connecticut, which is about 45 minutes from my home. She could only pay $45 a week but I would drive up there four days a week to watch those kids just to get that measly $45. One day when I was leaving to go, I wanted $2 for an ice cream cone (I was pregnant at the time and that was my thing during that pregnancy). I asked him for $2 and he said no. I reached into his wallet and took $2 anyway. So he came after me. I took out the butcher knife but he ran outside to get to the car first so I couldn't get in. I put away the knife and ran out the back door to try to get to the car first but he got there before me. I reached in to try to grab the car keys out of the ignition when he rolled the window up as hard as he could. I was screaming at the top of my lungs. I thought he was going to break my arm. I was able to backhand him and he unrolled the window. A little while later I ran to the neighbors to call the police because he ripped the phone lines out. I was there for about 15-20 minutes calling the police, family, and my friends to come and help. When I got back to the house, he had taken both cars (hid one in the neighborhood) and went to work. He left my 9-month-old and 1 1/2-year-old children all by themselves (and at the time I lived on a very busy street where cars would drive by at 50 mph). When I walked in, they were sitting on the living room floor screaming at the top of their lungs. The next morning I was in the shower and I lifted up my arms to wash my hair when out of the corner of my eye I saw something on the underside of my arm. It was a jet black bruise about four to five inches long by about two inches wide. It was literally jet black. I was stunned. When I called the police, I told them what was going on with his abuse. I told them I was pregnant with two little ones at home. I told them I had no food. I told them and showed them the bruise and I told them I wanted to press assault charges. They said, "He did that to you?" I said yes. I said, "I want him arrested for assault." I told them where he worked. They turned around and told me that because the incident happened the day before that there was nothing they would do and that they weren't going to go get him and arrest him. They told me to just let him lie low for a while. This happened in 1996. We are not talking the 50s here. This was just before they handed me a pamphlet on battered women and battered women's shelters. The pamphlet said there does not have to be any sign of physical abuse. If you are in a situation where you simply fear for your safety, the person can be arrested. And I am sitting there pregnant with a huge, jet black bruise underneath my arm from where he rolled my arm up in the window. This is just a few tidbits of the life I have had with him. There have been some good times and good vacations but mostly bad. We have fought so bad for years and years that I know the toll it has taken on the kids. The guilt I have is insurmountable. If he buys groceries, I have to pay him back. If he pays the phone bill, I have to pay him back. If he buys me anything or gives me a $10 or $20 bill, I have to pay him back. Most of the time, I am not allowed to go into a store with him. I went with him once to Wal-Mart and I put a $2 box of sweetener into the carriage. That was it. I am now not allowed to go into a store with him. He screams at us that he pays the rent, therefore, it is his house and we have to learn to live the way he wants us to and we should be catering to him. If we don't, he will take away things. He has told me for years that he is a king and that the house is his castle and that he has allowed us to live with him because he is kind, loving, and gracious. He will only buy one Christmas gift for his kids and no stocking stuffers or tape or wrapping paper or anything like that. I have to do that with what I get paid to do MT work. He doesn't buy them summer clothes, school clothes, winter clothes, NOTHING and never has. When they were little, I would tell him that the children needed some cool clothes for summer. He would take their little pants and cut them off and then take their turtleneck shirts and cut off the turtle neck and cut off the sleeves and say, "There you go. There's their summer clothes." Or he would just tell me, "Go ask your sister to buy them some clothes." He has threatened to kill me and the children if I leave. He has told me that he would kill me and the children before I would ever see child support. He has a sex fettish where he wants it all the time, every day multiple times in a day if he could get it (not that he does, mind you. I stopped that crazy crap a long time ago), and I am just supposed to stop all that I am doing and fulfill his needs (even though sex for me offers virtually nothing other than soreness, swelling, and boredom and has always been like this). If I don't, over a few days he will get very nasty and vindictive. I am very overweight, I smoke like a chimney, my credit is destroyed, I don't even own my own car or my home (we rent). I have less now 14 years later than I did before I married him. At least before I married him I had my own very nice car and some clothes. I don't even have that. My clothes are tattered, stained, and worn. And...I had dreams of what my life was going to be like when I got married. But it certainly was not a life like this. My kids are older now and they are seeing their father for who he is. He blames me and tells me it is all the bad stuff I am telling the children. I keep telling him it is what they have seen for 14 years. They beg me to divorce him. My youngest, who is 11, was diagnosed last year with severe ulcerative colitis. He has had a flare now for the past six weeks with at least ten bouts of diarrhea with blood every day. He talks about depression a lot and always asking me what it is. When I got the call last year from his pediatrician telling me to take him to the hospital for a possible blood transfusion (this was when we got his diagnosis), I almost fell on the floor from fear. I called my husband at work to tell him he needed to come home. He said, "I can't come home. I have to work." He said, "Don't you all think this is a bit overkill?" His red blood cell count had dropped to 7.2 from a normal of 12 because of his bleeding. He came to the hospital when he got out of work. He showed up at 6:00 p.m. We went outside and talked for a bit and then about 20 minutes after he showed up, he said, "Well, I have to go home to eat and shower. I'm tired." When I got angry, he said" Hey, I'm tired. I need to rest. Besides, there's nothing I can do here and it looks like they've got everything under control." We still didn't know what was wrong with him. I didn't know if it was cancer or what it was. I was scared to death. But he had to go home to eat and shower and rest!!!! I think that was the beginning of the end for me. I once read something on these boards that someone posted saying "Marriage is not supposed to be a good deal for one and misery for the other." That is what my life has been. My marriage was a great deal for him...kids that he never has to pay for (I mean nothing...not school projects and believe me there are a ton of them, not clothes, not shoes, notebooks, backpacks, nothing), free sex, and a wife that he doesn't have to take care of or pay for. I believe in my soul that my marriage was a good business deal for him. If you knew my husband, you would laugh at that statement because he is extremely uneducated and talks like a mentally retarded person. People in the past have actually asked me if he was mentally retarded. He thinks that if my son would drink lots and lots of water, that that will cure his ulcerative colitis and makes fun of me and insults me and everyone else. I tell him he is a moron and he doesn't know what he is talking about. His abusive mother made them drink nothing but water. She would not buy them anything or strive for a better life. They lived in a nightmare life. So now he gets very angry when we won't drink tons of water to "cure" everything. He tells us that he is trying to show us how to "live right" but we just won't listen. He tells this to other people too including our landlord. He has the most disgusting habits. He picks scabs and eats them, he has eczema and psoriasis so he is one huge flake, which he enjoys picking off chunks and dropping them in a pile on the floor, he passes unbearable gas (like every two or three minutes that has such a horrid stench it makes all of us nauseous) and then flips out if we spray a room spray. He will actually grab the can and scream that this is his house and we are all just disgusting to live with and just impossible to live with. He just had a fight with my 12-year-old daughter tonight because he was passing tons and tons of gas and she sprayed a room spray. He got up in her face screaming at the top of his lungs at 11:00 at night that this is his house. He will pass gas all he wants and that he won't tolerate room spray being sprayed and then called her a god d___n bitch. She was crying and begging me to divorce him. She kept saying," You said it would be better for the family if you stayed married to him but it's not better. It won't ever be better!" Well, I could go on and on. It has been 14 years of this but I think you get the picture. I have no money. I don't even own my own car. I have a son who is going to need ongoing frequent medical care and I am afraid he will cancel the insurance if I do anything to get rid of him. I have a great fear for our safety. He has major problems with having to give up his money so to have to pay child support will send him over the edge. He is a pathological liar so you can't believe anything he says even when he says he won't show up to court (which would be a dream come true). He told me, "I would never allow anyone to judge me like that. You can tell the judge to kiss my balls." He seems to expect the absolute highest standards from the children and I but he doesn't have to live up to anything, virtually nothing. Never has and never will but will shove it down my throat when he doesn't get what he wants from me. Well, any advice. I really am looking for legal advice for anyone else who has been through this. I know I need to get rid of him...for the kids sake. They need to see that life is not like this and not all men do this and that you don't tolerate abuse in any way, shape, or form. My daughter, who just turned 13, says to me she hates men with a passion. I told my niece that I felt like I was dying. I never, never, never, never leave my house except to go to Dunkin Donuts up the street to get a coffee. I haven't been out of my house for more than 3 hours in probably ten years. And that is three hours probably once every two months. I am lonely, isolated, and ragingly angry. I want to go back to school but when I talk about that, he poo poos it saying I should go back in five or ten years or 15 years when my bills are paid and I can afford it. HELLO????? I am going to be 43 in October. Maybe I should just wait to go back to school until I'm retired. Well you get the picture. If you've been through this and have any legal advice or any other advice, I would appreciate it. By the way, when I bring up any of his abuse to him, he tells me "I don't remember any of that." Funny, he always remembers every time I swear at him though. Has never forgotten a single time.
Happy Birthday - beware of coming off Depo
I have been on Depo for 7 years (I'm 25). I had what I would consider mild acne while on the Depo. I recently stopped the Depo (about 4 months ago) and I have never had acne this bad!!! I'm praying that it calms down once my hormones get back to normal. It's definitely no fun! I have Proactiv and it definitely helps to get rid of the redness and calms things down a little - good makeup covers the rest. Good luck!
Was having a great time (Beware, long rambling:-)
while I was scooping the back so thought I'd try to get a couple of pics for DH, who is gone for the next 10 days for work. He's a labradoodle that we got last summer at 4 months old and before anyone jumps in here and says they're overpriced mutts (which they are ) we got him from a shelter in another city. All of the dogs I have had have been from shelters and would never pay hundreds or thousands when there are so many dogs that need homes. We saw a brown one last summer that DH fell in love with, so I did some searching and this shelter had several. The others had been picked up as strays, a couple of older dogs and several puppies, which I guess all but a couple died from parvo. Jake was turned in by a family who thought he was too energetic for their 2-year-old. He had kennel cough, we discovered, when we got him home and was sick for a few weeks, but not too bad a case, had some snotty nose and coughing, was really worried about pneumonia, but the vet said to go ahead and give him the vaccine and sometimes that helps them get over it a little easier. He's got a nice combination of lab and poodle coat, needs to be raked once a week or so, but he doesn't shed. He's a little pill for sure but I think is going to be a great dog with a little more work. He's still pretty ~boisterous~ you might say on walks. I'm a Dog Whisperer fan, just love that show and Cesar Millan, so we ordered the collar that he uses on that show, and it really is making a huge difference. Also, I was really impressed when we got it. How many things do you find these days that are made in the US? His packaging on the collar had ~~we proudly support our country, made in the USA~~!! Even more of a fan now!
I have been checking out boxer rescues and if we can afford a home of our own, hopefully next year sometime, I'd like to get a pal for him. I'm actually a big boxer fan from way back, have a pic mom took of me as a baby in diapers sitting in the middle of a litter of boxer puppies with them crawling all over me! a wonder any of us grew up, huh , with all the things we came in contact with like that, she'd probalby get hauled away for child abuse these days. Dad found the mamma boxer wandering the country roads one hot summer day when he was hail adjusting. She was struggling, pregnant, really hot and thirsty, so he brought her home, no one ever claimed her, so Duchess became a part of our family. I had a boxer some years ago that I adopted from a puppy mill raid, where I helped take care of some of the dogs that were rescued, 200 and some of all varieties and ages, mostly all sick, filthy, malnourished, etc. in the the middle of January, below zero, snow, and a lot of them kept outside with no shelter, was a horrible mess, but people in that town really stepped up to the plate, donated all kinds of food, leashes, collars, bedding, vets donated their services, and all but a few of the dogs (too sick and had to be put down) were adopted. Duke was a very sick pup at first and didn't know if he'd make it, but he was a wonderful dog with my kids when they were young!
Anyway, just sitting here browsing the board and rambling on...By the way Hayseed, I visited your website the other day because I wanted to see your web cam (really cool!) and saw you had an RIP pic for Arf, sorry for your loss. I remember you said awhile back you thought it wouldn't be long but must have missed when he passed and crossed the bridge.
Beware of fixing your own stove, fire hazard! nm
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spelling police beware the swift correction of the administrator! ha! nm
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Our kids got their own credit/debit cards when they hit 18 and got jobs. Their success or lack of
s
lead in toys/Made in China...beware of Happy Meal toys
I watched a special on CNN yesterday about lead content in toys. I did not realize by your child simply touching a toy and putting his fingers in his mouth he could be ingesting lead. The special included a segment on a nice family that lived in a brand new home with a 2 year old and 6 month old. They both tested positive for lead. A 2 year old!!!! Worried, I went to my boy's toybox this morning and it is AMAZING how many painted toys are from China. Most notably this includes happy meal toys. I haven't gotten through one toy box and already have a trash bag full of toys. Please, please go through your children's toys. Lead ingestion can lead to brain damage. Be paranoid. Throw away all of the made in China stuff. Christmas is just weeks away--they will be getting new stuff (hopefully stuff that is paint-free!).
Your best bet is to buy made in the USA toys but even safer toys are unpainted blocks, Legos and books. A good, safe place to look for toys is www.mindware.com.
pass this on!
gas card
I always go with cash, but if you don't like that maybe a gift card to the local gas station. Ours has this in any denomination you choose.
Credit card (SM)
There was information about credit cards and interest rates going around late last year/early this year. Basically, from what I understand with the new bankruptcy law this was attached to it. The credit card companies can and will charge you and me whatever interest rate they want to, and the only thing we can do is cancel the card and pay off the balance. There were these little inserts with your statements that many of us just throw away and never think about it. But I did read the ones that were sent with several of my statements, and I kindly told them to keep my rate where it was and I canceled the card. Sad but true.
Gift Card
Just a note. I learned from my daughter and my neices that the VISA gift cards are the prefered gift card. They can be used anywhere salons, stores, and even gas stations which for a 16-yo can be a lifesaver.
About my credit card
I owed close to $10,000.00 about 2 months ago on my credit card and called to make sure I sent the right amount as paying it off. After I paid in full, they also sent a "finance charge" for around 35 to 40 dollars. I paid that but have discontinued using that card. I have another card, used during Christmas, interest about half of the other one and getting that paid off before long also, just sent $500.00 towards that yesterday. I on the first had asked for payoff amount but the finance not there when I asked.
I think a card or something simple would be
appropriate. It is the thought that counts. I'm not talking a diamond ring or something! He just doesn't make much of any holidays. Yes, my kids are very young so they cannot do much themselves. One time he did take the kids for part of the day and let me relax.
Anyone Want a Calling Card?
I just bought a calling card for work and it screws up the dictation too bad. Would anyone like it for personal use? I can e-mail the number and PIN to you. No charge, just don't want it to go to waste, and we have a cell phone for LD.
When it says no gifts, I always take a card. nm
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yes, I got a Kohl's card
I love to shop at Kohl's. Will be heading there Saturday, after my son does something with my hair - can hardly wait!!!
not a sympathy card...
Just a congrats on your new baby and friendship, etc... No, sympathy on behalf of the baby would be totally out of order. The baby is fine except for a common foot deformity. It is correctable. No she needs a pick me up card. Something to brighten her day.
credit card
I've not had personal experience, but I know to be wary of some of those companies that advertise. I saw a financial advisor on the Today Show and she said to make sure you go with Consumer Credit Counseling; maybe there's a link on the Today Show website. Good luck!
Pay off our credit card
And with the little we'd have left just put it in the bank
Maybe not a gift card
but a gift certificate to a groomer might be nice!
I've never used an air card, but
I hear they are just as fast. I don't know anything about them, really, sorry
Questions about your card-
Have you paid on time every time and have you paid the amount due? I have credit cards and mine have not gone up- in fact if they did I would call, tell them what an excellent customer I have been and then ask for a reduction in the credit rate. Have done before and they did this for me.
My husband and I have one card
that we pay off every month. I am so sick and tired of being punished for being responsible when irresponsible people are constantly getting "taken care of." We should be rewarding responsible people....not the other way around. This is ridiculous and frankly....it p!sses me off.
credit card debt
Not sure what will happen, but I do wish you luck. Credit card debt is an unsecured type of debt. I don't know what more they can do to you other than a judgement. Not sure you can put that under a bankruptcy either once the judgement has been placed. I know a lawyer that handles a lot of bankruptcies -- did some work for him. He always asked his clients if late payments had gone to judgements. If they had not gone that far he was pleased about it. I guess it made things easier legally. Not really sure.
Welcome back card to Hilton
Dear Hilton:
We are so happy to have you back. We heard about your rash. We think this poem will help. Post it above your cell toilet:
If you're here to have a sit -
stand on the seat.
The crabs at Lynwood Jail
can jump ... three feet!
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