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Amicable? Only you could determine that since you know his temperament, etc. sm

Posted By: MQer on 2006-11-09
In Reply to: Amicable divorce, can it be done?....sm - Hoping

No one knows but you how you think he will react.

I don't think we should give up on our spouses due to alcoholism, in my opinion. He needs help. But, he needs to want him and I understand that. Can you sit him down, look him in the eye, tell him how much you love him (or don't you?) and beg for him to change and get help and then you would consider staying? Maybe it will take that and unconditional love instead of, and I quote, being a miserable "bit**." Maybe that is why he is drinnking. I'm sorry to have to say that.

I would stay focused on helping your husband get the help he needs. Your kids will love you for it in the end and he will too if he comes clean. don't give up hope. Don't give up on him yet. I'm all for making it work with all you've got. I was in a miserable marriage until I took action and he changed completely. We couldn't be happier. It takes a strong woman and not many can do it or stomach it because it's so easy to give up. Good luck.


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Amicable divorce, can it be done?....sm

It's time DH and I end our marriage. It's not a good situation for any of us. Long story short, DH thinks it is me because I'm a miserable B**ch. All I know is DH is an alcoholic, which overpowers everything, so I have no idea, in all honesty, what lies beneath. The kids and I pretty much know every morning when we get up that today will end like every other day with dad coming home after his six pack +, feeling guilty, looking for imperfections in everyone else to gripe about to avoid the fact that he's drunk once again, and no mater how much we try, in the end, in an argument.


I'm mad at DH for choosing the alcohol over his family, I'm angry at myself for staying longer than I should have, etc., etc., etc.


I've decided the bottom line is that I want healthier, more peaceful, and more productive lives for myself and my kids. In the best interest of my children, he is their father and no matter how much hostility I feel towards him, the best thing for my children is that neither of their parents ends up destroyed or broke over the divorce. Basically, I want to remain focused on the goal of providing a better life to myself and my children, including not contributing to the destruction of their father. My suspicion is he is going to end up destroying himself anyway, but I honestly don't want to force that to happen. The optimal outcome for the kids would be to end up with two emotionally stable and financially secure parents. Is it possible to end the marriage without destroying the kids?  Is it possible to stay focused on the ultimate goal of having a more peaceful and satisfying life for you and the kids and to just let go of anything that does not make a positive contribution toward that effort?  Has anyone successfully managed an "amicable" divorce, or at least as amicable as possible?  I've already wasted 15 years on a marriage I knew all along was never going to be successfull no matter how much I  wanted it to be. Any advice?


 


 


The unpredictable temperament and

genetic predisposition to aggression of your beloved pit bull breed caused this man's death.  He was not killed by a Great Dane or a Great Pyrenees or a Labrador or a Golden or a St. Bernard.  He was killed by 3 pit bulls that should have respected him as their master, elderly or not, demented or not. 


You seem to be focused on placing blame on the others in the house who left him alone with the pit bulls.  I agree with you that they are responsible -- just as you would be responsible if your pit bull were to attack someone.  And with a pit bull it is always possible.  You may think you are taking every precaution against it, but you can never, ever be sure what your dog will find threatening, and thus when your dog will attack.


Zoey movie will probably determine it

There's a movie coming on Nick with her staring (Goodbye Zoey?) and I think the ending of that movie will really determine whether they are staying on the air or not. That's probably why they won't say for sure, holding suspense!
A vet could determine if poisoned or heat stroke.
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