Also try reading about comparative religion and myth - sm
Posted By: Another Searcher on 2008-12-08
In Reply to: Thanks ... I will - Toni
I recommend The Power of Myth (book and series of specials on PBS) with Joseph Campbell. Interesting stuff. The search for the meaning of life is world-wide and Christianity is certainly not the only belief system out there, nor organized religion in general for that matter!
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This is not religion, this is MYTH.
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The Purity Myth
How America's Obsession With Virginity is Hurting Young Women is a book by Jessica Valenti, and makes some really valid and interesting points.
They turn women and girls into /moral/good or immoral/bad sisters. There is no room for the idea that young women might want to be sexy or to have sex. It teaches girls that their moral status comes from their sexual (in)activity, whereas boys learn that being moral means making responsible choices.
The obsession with virginity overshadows real issues that effect women such as affordable healthcare, reproductive rights, and sexual trafficking.
Abstinenence commitments do not work, and have resulted in higher STDs among these young people.
The chastity movement also promotes the idea that girls/women cannot be trusted to make decisions about their bodies, and fetishizes virginity.
Also- what is sex? Merely intercourse? Oral sex? Are lesbians then virgins?
One final point- those who "cherish" and save their virginity, are more often than not very disappointed by sexuality.
I highly recommend this book for all who have contact with girls and young women.
Purity Myth...
There are very valid emotional development reasons for a teenaged girl not to have sex.
Teenage girls and teenaged boys are very different at this age. The girls want to be loved, cherished, and taken care of, and the boys would tell a girl anything to convince her to have sex. Love and a healthy relationship just aren't in a teenaged boy's emotional ability. That unbalance can have some devastating consequences to a young girl's self esteem.
Rejection by a boy is hard enough to take at that age, it is a million times harder if the girl has been intimate with the boy. It is especially devastating when the boy then brags to his peers that he has made the conquest.
There are more reasons for remaining a virgin until you are an adult and capable of adult judgement than just the fear of pregnancy or an STD.
I think that the idea of a 15 year old girl having sex with a boy because he has lied to her and made her promises that he has no intention of keeping is much worse than any damage done by advising that girl to wait until she is an adult to have sex.
The locking jaws are just a myth
Do some research. This is something I did find out. No dog has the bony or muscular structure in their anatomy to have a locking jaw.
Also the huge muscular looking pits are hybrid. A good show quality pit does not have the huge blocky head, short legs and overly exaggerated muscular. I actually think they are a beautiful breed. Especially the reds.
I just read some reports of a couple of kids killed by huskies in the last year. My SIL's huskies completely tore apart a cat that wondered into their yard. Fox terriers are hugely prey-driven dogs. They can and will hunt down and kill small animals, just for the kill. Are we going to ban those breeds?
There are some pictures of my vicious killer here:
It is all a myth, and they just want to modernize it and make it more palatable. sm
In short, they want to make money on the film.
Tell them it is against your religion.
That has worked for me and have had some say, really? I just refuse, simple for me.
As far as I know, it sounds like her religion....
is Penecostal. I believe that the women in that religion wears skirts at all times. Jehovah's Witnesses do not wear skirts all the time, only when attending congregation meetings and when out in their ministry that they do.
I feel very sorry for the OP because it sounds like her & hubby are good friends to the couple. It is true that divorce hurts everyone....what's worse is that marriage can sometimes hurt everyone too.
In a case like this, it is better to just be supportive to both parties and try not to take sides, hopefully they will iron things out.
No MT, no politics, no religion. Anything else is ok.
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I am not trying to be disrespectful but her religion- sm
is/was her business. If I was on my deathbed the last thing I would want do discuss with my relatives would be if I had accepted Jesus into my heart, etc. I really hate it that new "christians" feel it is there mission in life to "save" everybody and feel they have to convert everybody and save them from themselves. My dad has recently refound religion and it is causing lots of strife in our family which is very non-religious. No one wants to be with him because his is constantly nagging us to go to church with him, to convert, etc. He blamed it on my mom (who is dead) as the reason why he did not return to the church sooner - horsepucky as Colonel Potter would say-- once she died he was re-born 3 months later. I am not baptist, nor do I go to church, nor do my kids. They know about Jesus and God though, but I don't feel the need or desire to go to church every Sunday and hand them over 10% of our gross income which in our case would almost pay for a second house. You should not be worrying about your grandmother's salvation, worry about yourself and stop trying to save the world. I am sure she is where she wanted to be and her spirit will live on in your heart and memories.
That's the Muslim Religion
Haven't you seen or heard how they treat their women, especially with all the stuff happening in the Middle East now. They are the ruler of the family and the women must cow-tow [sic] to them.
IOW, women are second class citizens in their world just like it used to be in the U.S. before Susan B. Anthony and others. If you daughter wants to be independent, there is no way it will happen being married to him. I wouldn't even bother telling the parents since they are getting a divorce, BUT MAKE SURE you get a restraining order on him or else it may get very dangerous.
I don't mean to scare you, but please be careful.
woodchucks & religion
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could wood? Gotta smile....As for the posts about religion, let the Christians be.... It matters not whether you're Baptsit, Jewish, Budhist, Christian, Hindu, Catholic, AME Zion, 7th day Adventists, Jehovah's Witnesses, atheists...There's a lot more people here in the US with diverse backgrounds and beliefs....That's what makes this country so great...freedom of speech and the freedom to practice the religion of your choice Lighten up.
This is too much! I was just over on the Religion board and sm
someone posted a link to Alan Jackson's How Great Thou Art. It was an amazing tribute. Then another slow song came on after that and I came over here while letting the music play in the background. I was doing fine until I read about the 10 y.o. getting fitted for dentures. I am bawling my eyes out over here! I have a sweet, precious, well-behaved 10 year old son. I can't imagine. I just can't. O God, help us.
I am not turning this to a religion argument- sm
I prefer not to have my child taught at a church school for personal reasons. The school they were attending squeezed in church teachings as it is, though they were not a church school, and I was not thrilled with that either. Some teachers did it more than others. As for find a teacher that "really cares" only being at a church affiliated school, that is quite a broad statement to make. At the private school my kids had been attending, the teaches were paid 25% less than what the teachers made at the public school level, which could mean 3 things, the teacher really cared and wanted a small class size to teach, (2) wanted kids that were less troublesome to teach and better behaved (3) the teacher was inadequate and could not get hired in a public school (which was the case for a few teachers where my kids were). ---There are a lot of angles to look at when considering private school religion is one of them, tuition, quality of the teachers, certification, the school board, the parent organization, the involvment expects --ours was extreme involvement which is good and bad (burnout)--I am much happier now with the kids in public school, and my 8-y/o is now actually being taught by a qualified computer teacher and not some old lady who knew nothing about computers or computer programs trying to make a few extra bucks having the kids make designs and pictures on the computer (they had a new computer teacher every year as they'd quit every year). There are pros and cons to every school, you got to find out what you want to deal with.
yep, religion and landowners.....I agree! sm
The Crusaders - yep, I remember it well. Also, I divorced a man who later on became born again and now we cannot have ONE conversation without him bringing that aspect of life into the convo.
Really bothers me too........geesh.
there are *weird psychos* in EVERY religion...
I so respect everyone's religion but I am appalled by religious fanatics...the ones who go wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy overboard and I think misinpret Bibles.......taking things to the EXTREME.....
fanatics, extremists - nope, cannot deal with them....and shouldn't have to but I notice each religion has so many different levels and sects - it's almost like different religions within each separate religion....I get some of that....but not all of it....
*scratches head quizzically* because I'm a live and let live type of person and so it's difficult to understand why EVERYONE doesn't let everyone live and let live.....
Not the right term to use here. Amen against religion?nm
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I also know of one religion that helps out community
they actually pay back some in taxes to communities where there is a volunteer fire department, etc., precisely because they benefit from such services.
No, it is an inferance and any teaching of religion -sm
should be done by the parents. I had my kids in private school up until 2 years ago, took them out for several reasons, one being that many of the teachers were teaching about God and making them pray before every meal (snack and lunch). I was paying $12K a year for my kids not to be in a church school, as this was not a religious school (or at least not supposed to be). I could have sent them to many, many cheaper schools in the area but they were all church affiliated. Some of us don't want our kids to be taught by others. I explain all the different religions to my kids, but don't want some outsider to teach their beliefs to my child. It is not their business to teach religion, if they want to do that then become a minister and run a church.
i beg to differ. I wish i had freedom FROM religion
I get treated by a leper because I am athiest.
But, shouldn't this be on the RELIGION Board?? nm
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Are you rejecting religion and the Bible or God?
I have problems myself with organized religion; however, I have personal proof of life after death, which leads me to believe in a Creator. Just curious about where you're coming from.
I know the catholic religion has guidelines
that my religion, Methodist, don't have as I have relatives that have converted so they can get married. I think in my cousin's case, he did not want to jump through all those hoops and was thinking about getting married by a methodist preacher. That priest told them that if they do that, but then his wife-to-be would loose her place in the church, meaning she could still go but she could not, participate in ceremonies, make decisions for the church etc., because she would not be considered married and living in sin.
Anyway, I think your dd and future SIL should get a 2nd opinion from another priest. But, you should remember too that this is their battle. If they are big enough to get married, they are big enough to fight their own battles. If they truly want to be married than they will and this is pretty much small potatoes.
Sounds like a conservative religion. Mennonite
perhaps? They are less conservative than Amish, but very conservative - skirts and meeting in homes being my only clues. But that said - normally any conservative "religion" also does not approve of divorce no matter what - save adultery. And I have heard that some conservative "reconstructionist" groups do not even support divorce under those circumstances either - sounds like the wife is playing some games. Very sad, and I'm sorry for you folks, too. Divorce hurts everyone.
take your bible thumping to the religion board.
Another good example of a CARNAL "Christian" calling people pathetic and nauseating, a fine example of "love thy neighbor as thyself." LOL
Didn't say you couldn't talk about religion
She just said to take it to the Christianity Boards and keep it off the Gab Board. I had no problem with it, but the we're not in charge, the modertor/adminstrator is.
Isn't it illegal to fire someone for observing their own religion? nm
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Haven't you heard? Freedom of religion isn't for...SM
Christians. It's for everyone else. Sure a Muslim can pray in this country anytime they want, heck you can worship satan himself or practice witchcraft, but a be a Christian and actually admit you are one, let alone pray or read your Bible in public... come on, are you serious? You know every Christian has a secret agenda. We're just proselytizing little brainwashed fools. We're not just praying quietly to ourselves -- we are praying God will send a lightening bolt and strike all the unbelievers. We Christians aren't just placing our Bibles on our desks to read during our breaks -- we HOPE to beat someone over the head with it at some point during the day.
Freedom of religion has been twisted by the liberal spin doctors. It only applies to to those who think like them.... ironic isn't it?
"The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them." -- Lenny Bruce
Religion is not the only means to spirituality or vice versa (SM)
They certainly do exist together for many people, but they do exist exclusive of each other for others. An atheist can be the most spiritual person on the block over his or her religious peers. Spirituality is a concept that is different for each person. It is what makes a person feel they are at the right place at the right time, like they are at peace, or whatever someone decides for themself is their truth.
Think outside the box!
Yes, but Indian's from India are not Muslim. They are of the Hindu religion. sm
they also believe in reincarnation and not the Koran.
They do treat women as a much lower class, though.
Doesn't matter what religion they are, the Indians treat
.
That's what I LOVE about America. Freedom of Religion, speech, etc. But sm
I have to say, if you are an atheist (I am a Christian, BTW), where is your moral "compass" (sorry for the pun) I was an atheist for many, many years (3/4 of my life spent without God or religion). In that time I was: Suicidal, desperate, a liar, a phony, had no direction in life, a slander and just about everything else worldly you could think of. I was selfish..must I go on?
Then, when I hit rock bottom I had no where to look but up. He was there (God). He placed me upon a rock and I've never looked back or down since. I can honestly say I no longer lie or think bad thoughts about other people. I have a clear direction for my life. I do follow Biblical principles and obey His laws. I have a moral compass and a value system I am so proud of. As an atheist there was no right or wrong in my life. Since I didn't fear God I did basically whatever I felt was good or right, even believe in abortion. I am being totally transparent with you, from one ex-atheist to another atheist.
How do you explain a radical life change such as myself? Where do you draw your line of morality from? God says abortion is wrong and so it's wrong. God says a gay lifestyle is an abomination, and so it is. Don't get mad at me, It's in His Word. He said it. Not me.
Anyways, I think that there is much to be said about living a good Christian lifestyle and following its beliefs. My life is in clear order now instead of chaos. I have a life-long goal - to make it to heaven and take those whom I love with me.
What a sad, sad life I led before God. Wow. Like the old saying goes, "I never want to go back to my old life." Good luck to you.
I did last year and promptly told to post on religion board.
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Heads up! The Gab board is for general discussion not to include MT, Religion, or Politics.
This was put into place when we very first set up the Gab board. We have a Christianity, Conservatives, and Liberals forum that you can post on. But, let me be clear. I do not condone trashing of anyone's religious preference and neither should you. I expect posts on any of these forums to be respectful (that does NOT mean we are censoring, there IS a difference). This is NOT open for debate. These are the rules. If you can't respect them, you don't need to post here.
If I'm reading right
then it makes perfect sense to me. He does not, no how, no way, no matter what happens, want anymore children. She "would not mind" having more children, but is willing to not have more children because of his wishes. However, should something happen, God forbid, to her husband or their marriage, she potentially would like to have more children.
Not sure why she wants him to have a vasectomy, but if I did read it right, it is his best insurance policy (short of abstinance) to ensure he does not get what he does not want. However, you are correct that there are other ways to avoid pregnancy, but sounds like the OP just wants her husband to be happy (by not getting what he does not want).
OP, I do agree with the posting that suggested you should not have scheduled this for him while he is of the mind set of not wanting to have it done. My husband just did have it done (our youngest child is 10 years old). After our youngest child was born, without my suggesting it, hubby had said that he would have it done because he felt that it was the right/fair thing to do. After all, I had gone through the two pregnancies/childbirths/breastfeeding, etc. While I appreciated the sentiment, he did not follow through with it until he HAD to. He had a varicocele that was causing referred pain up under his arm, which prompted him to see the family doc, who did not diagnose the varicocele, but after attempting to clear an "infection" (a "knot" in his testicle) with a couple of rounds of antibiotics, eventually he referred to a urologist.
I have not been able to take hormonals for years due to headaches and other problems associated with them, and had had an IUD placed, but had to have it removed the following day, so we had been using condoms for most of the 10-year time period (and even THAT did not prompt him to go ahead and have it done, after it was his idea to do it -- men can be such babies . . . LOL).
Because of the varicocele, he had to be put under and the surgery was a little more extensive than the normal, in-office procedure, and hubby has come through just fine. Yes, there is pain involved, but I imagine there was a little bit of pain involved with birthing your babies. I think he should "be a man" and just do it.
you might be reading too much into this
I have two daughters currently undergoing orthodontia treatment and their docs (brothers) either call us that night to see how they are feeling after their treatment or send a personal note. Just very friendly, caring orthodontists. They also have an office full of pretty young ladies and are both married with a bunch of kids and lovely wives. They are just very nice guys.
Could be that your orthodontist is just trying to be a nice guy. Don't embarrass yourself by reading too much into what could be an innocent effort to make your treatment time more enjoyable.
Currently reading
 "Cross" by James Patterson, next on my stack of 10 new books is "I Heard That song before by Mary Higgins Clark. I'm an avid reader - can you tell??
Only just reading this, so very sorry.
I lost my little man kitty Dante, it has been almost 2 years, I've been thinking about him after reading all the supportive messages above. I was just telling my daughter yesterday that I think it's time to go to the Shelter and find a new little kitty to love. The value of their company cannot be measured. God Bless, take comfort in all the good days you had together. I'll say a little prayer that your heart does not hurt too much or for too long.
Wise
Reading this over and I think
your aunt does not have the ability to change a will. That is not what an executor does, that is not the position to change what is in a will. If you and your brother get anything at all, I think you should be glad because you were only taking the place of your father, his own child, as your father is demented. I went thru a similar thing, my father died and I had a deceased brother. The insurance company was supposed to divide insurance between the children of my deceased brother and me as they were taking the place of my brother. After a year's time they could not find them and they sent me the balance of 1/2 of the insurance fund. I am thinking perhaps with no changes made prior to the demise of your grandfather, that money perhaps might go to your father and hence like you do not want it to go, to the state. That would not be good for any of his entitled heirs but you might have an uphill battle with lawyers, the courts, etc. in this case. You can break a will and if lots there to be gotten, then probably can take this course. The aunt should already have hers coming, is that not right so I doubt with her telling the power of attorney to get a lawyer she is trying for more, only she does not have the authority to just break herself.
I don't know... From what I'm reading on other
sites, people are so tired of Adam's monotonous exact screams in every single song that the Danny voters will probably swing to Kris, so it could be up for grabs. AI has a message board too.
Thanks, after reading your post...sm
I decided I am going to call and speak with the manager first. Yes, I was supposed to go back to the same girl today but I changed my mind. I am going to explain the situation to the manager and ask if I can come in another day when this hairdresser is not there for a fix by someone else.
Ladies, please after reading your
posts you are sounding like a bunch of feuding school aged girls. What in the world is your problem? Retract your claws and be friends again, ok?
I did a lot of reading before Thanksgiving
when we made one - it was rather small - just for the 2 of us - and it turned out perfect. Husband likes very rare and we knew we would have a few slices left over which we would then microwave so wanted them rare also. The best advice I can give is to buy a good thermometer and take out before it reaches the temp you want for rare, medium or whatever - as it does continue to cook for a few minutes outside the oven - which surprised this old cook!! It actually rose 5-10 degrees (cannot recall right now) and that can make a huge difference in a small prime rib - I was shocked! :))
After reading the below posts sm
I have to laugh. I have HP and have no trouble at all. It is the same thing with kitchen appliances. Have mostly GE and am not happy but many surveys say GE is one of the best.
OK-what is your fav book or what are you reading now
My very favorite book is Outlander by Diana Galbadon and I am current re-reading the second book in the Outlander series, Dragonfly in Amber. I would like to reread all 6 of them this summer, but Harry Potter is also coming out, so we'll see. They are all huge books.
I loved reading this. sm
I also read it on the Comedy board and shared it with my Bible School class. Will share wtih my adult Sunday School also.
I have really enjoyed reading all of these.
Thank you for all your help.
I have been reading all these posts sm
and debating on what to say. Bear with me, this could be long. My mother's mother lives in California and has all my life. I live in Virginia. I havew seen my grandmother exactly 5 times and I am now 40. My mother died unexpectedly 3 years ago (she lived here and was extremely close with all her grandchildren). I knew that my mother and grandmother did not have a close relationship but they did love each other. The night before the funeral my father and I had such a long wonderful talk. He told me then that he never ever heard my grandmother say anything positive, not even anything nice to my mother. He wasn't trying to critize my GM but was just stating the facts. Two years ago my parents (dad and stepmother) decided to take each grandchild (4) on a separate vacation. My daughter really wanted to go to CA. Not necessarily to see her great-grandmother but wanted to include that in the trip. My parents asked me to go along. We flew to San Francisco and drove to her home about 3 hours away. Now keep in mind, my GM loves my father and thinks he put the moon and sun in the sky. We were only going to stay in her town over night simply becuase the woman is not enjoyable to be around. She has a very tiny home so we decided to stay in a hotel. My GM asked me if my daughter and I would like to stay with her. I did not want to but my stepmother really thought I should. We arrived and after spending some time at her house trying to show her pictures of the other grandchildren (she really wasn't very interested) we took her to lunch. I tried to talk to her about the likes of my other child as well as my nieces and what there life was like. She just kept interuppting and changing the subject. Mostly about my brother or to talk to my father. As we were leaving the restaurant my SM pulled me aside and said that we should definitely stay at the hotel. My GM has no other family except my brother and I. I still call her every week but the conversations are always the same. No interest in my life. My son's 17th b-day is tomorrow and he got a card from her yesterday. It was pink and covered in flowers. This is not a woman who I want to spend time with and never have for multiple reasons. I could write a book. Please don't "make" your children go. There are obvious reasons in their minds and you should respect that.
After reading some of your posts,
it sounds like maybe he just wants to stay married so he can keep you under his thumb. I'm sure it's better for him financially if you stay together and he has someone to do the household chores as well. As for asking for sex via email, that is creepy. But, I would still wonder whether he is getting somewhere else. I think men would still continue to ask, just on the off-chance that you actually would say yes, but get it somewhere else, too. I'd be afraid of what he could bring home. As for the kids, I agree with the other posters. The kids will pick up on this, but sadly enough, they will grow up believing it's a normal relationship when it's not, thus the generation-after-generation epic of divorce. That's just my opinion, though, and I'm certainly not an expert.
Now, back to you, I'm sorry that you're not getting any with someone who loves and respects you. So often, it is just assumed that the woman doesn't need/desire intimacy, when in all honesty women crave that intimacy even more than men. It's not necessarily the physical aspect of the intimacy that women crave, but rather the emotional. The fact that he asks for it so bluntly via email on a daily basis is his way of degrading you. Don't let it go on any longer. I would be headed straight to the divorce lawyer's office. Many women have been through divorce and made it through okay. You're children will support you once they see how much happier you are without him. Good luck to you. 
Thanks everyone for sharing - still reading, lol. sm
She has had her "permit" and has been driving with me (and siblings, lol) for a year now. I have let her drive as much as possible because I too feel like one poster said about the more experience the more comfortable and responsible. My sister got killed in a car wreck at 21 so my DD is very aware of how panicky I am about letting her drive and myself letting go more than anything I think. She has been an excellent driver (while I am in the car that is). We do live in a little country town so she would not be allowed to drive into the big city with major traffic for a long while by herself. She has driven there 2-3 times with me and on her first trip I allowed her to drive to town, someone rear-ended us!! I laugh now though because she didn't know what to do at all. We were at a stop (red light), the lady hit us about the same time the light turned green, and DD proceeded to go with the greenlight! I was like hmm, what are you doing? She didn't realize we had been hit as she was proceeding to go when we got hit. It's funny after the fact because no one was hurt, just minor fender bender, but at least it was a learning experience for her and was not her fault.
My SIL's mother owns a Mexican restaurant close to us and will work around her schedule to allow her to work when she can so she does have the capacity of getting a job if she can ever have time to work. She has helped there temporarily on holidays a few times already. I think she will have some time this summer though as cheer practice is usually over at noon and she will just have to save up to pay her bills.
I kind of feel I should cover her with how hard she is working at school and activities, but don't want to "spoil" my child and not make her appreciate it and not learn responsibility so I want to make her be responsible for something. Of course, her 16-yo friend got a brand new, off the show room floor Mazda RX7. That is parental ignorance in my opinion and aint happening for my kids even if I could afford it. I can tell you one night they didn't get home from a game until 11:30 p.m. on a school night and I was livid. She was up until 1 a.m. studying for her semester exam the next day!! She is very dedicated, but that is ridiculous. Our local community college gives the entire top 10 a full paid scholarship so that is why she is encouraged to make the top 10 and pushing really hard towards this goal. She is already taking some college classes at school (combo classes) including A&P as she wants to be ultrasound tech and that is a tough class.
I have checked into ins, which is out the roof, but they also deduct points based on good grades, etc. so I want to at least make her partially pay for this so she will be encouraged not to speed, keep the grades up, etc. and realize it will all save her money by doing so.
Good tip though to let her drive home and to school. That is one thing we don't do as it is so routine she doesn't ask then and I don't think about it. You are definitely right, that parking lot is crazy and makes me never want to let my son drive when I see those teenage boys spinning out in the parking lot. I'll start letting her do that. Thanks again everyone!!
This happens with my sunglasses as well as reading
and I know what you are talking about. I think the haziness comes from either touching your face with the lens part or maybe your breath. I usually just take mine off and then put back on. Has nothing to do with the price you paid.
Summer reading
I'm currently reading a great book on Einstein. It was published in 2007, after all of his papers finally became public. Author is Walter Isaacson, and it's called: EINSTEIN - HIS LIFE AND UNIVERSE. He also wrote BENJAMIN FRANKLIN - AN AMERICAN LIFE, which I may read next. Funny how as one gets older, fiction often is less interesting than real life.
Many, many people were involved in getting the details of Einstein's life and the science right, and even HS science teachers were brought in to bring the scientific explanations down to high school level so we'd all have a chance of understanding it. It's 551 pages long, plus an additional 125 pages of credits! It starts out with a few pages describing the "main characters" in the book. I'm just getting started, but I can tell it's going to be fascinating.
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