Also, I tend to look back at decisions I made and (sm)
Posted By: Just curious on 2009-01-07
In Reply to: if your ex is the type of person who would allow (sm) - Just curious
question whether I made the right decision. I will blame myself for things...but then often when I look back and think through exactly how I came to the decision that I ended up with, I remember how things were at that time, and how I felt, and I know that if I was in the same situation again, I would make the same decision. I bet you would too. You don't seem like the type of person who would make a big decision like that lightly. I am in the process of making a decision about divorcing. I am a Christian and I think I have probably stayed way longer than I should have. However, I have been praying hard lately, and asking others to pray for me, and things have been miraculously lining up and I believe pointing toward divorce. I am not expecting a bed of roses, nor to be rid of my husband, but I am hoping and praying for some oasis of peace in between his visits.
Complete Discussion Below:  marks the location of current message within thread
The messages you are viewing
are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select
the boards given in left menu
Other related messages found in our database
The news does tend to be bad, true. Put your head back in the sand then.
However, see if you can stomach this....2 yr old toddler disappears for a month as her mother appears to party like a 22 year old with no children by the camera's eye. When grandma finally realizes something is amiss upon discovering her daughters abandoned car with the smell of decomposing human tissue in the trunk, the 911 calls begin. Casey Anthony is a deeply disturbed young woman who by all appearances seems to have done away with her beautiful little girl by means of a shovel and gasoline. The truly unfortunate person here is the child, Caylee, whose mother is a monster.
mmmm.. decisions, decisions...
Vincent D'onofrio (cause I LOVE him), and Gerard Butler cause that accent is just too sexy. We have a doctor here that has an accent similar to that and we all fight over who gets to type him, LOL.
I did years back, but made up with her..and then
SO.....don't waste that emotion *hate* because we don't know when our lives end. My sister was 30 when she died, in the late 1970s. I'm just happy we had made up 6 months prior to that. Her death was a shock to all of us. One of my children was named after her AND even looks like her....
One never knows around the corner........
Decisions, decisions
I would go for the cheaper place - because I would be out doing things. I would not pay for the amenities unless I was planning to stay in the condo all the time and sit by their pool.
The guys will have no trouble finding a golf course - they are all over the place here in Florida. The condo owners can probably help you with the course fees and tell you which courses would be likely to have tee times available at the time your guys want to play.
Have a wonderful time! Remember, it's rainy season here and you may be holed up in the condo for half the time you're here - so bring some books to read, DVDs to watch, or plan some indoor activities like museum visits, or movies, etc.
FLA-USA - GO GATORS!
husband decisions
Sounds like my hubby. My kids absolutely adore him, but they work for everything they get from him. He must be a bit of a control freak, too. I am really tired of my husband making dumb decisions that I don't agree on and putting us in difficult situations. He gets "tunnel vision" and sees what he wants to see, there is absolutely nothing I can do. He nags me to the point of giving in. He is worse than the children. Then HE gets mad when I get mad,and tries to turn it back on me. He's very manipulative. It's exhausting also, especially the situation you described. Not fair; if she worked for four hours, she should get the same amount as big bro, don't care what she did. I hear you.
I know - and I really want out of transcription NOW - thus, the decisions! nm
x
Do you ever question your husband's decisions? Does he get mad? (sm)
 My husband got our kids to rake leaves Sunday for about 4 hours and told them he would pay them for it. Son is 10 and big for his age, daughter is 7 and smaller. They both worked hard, to the best of their abilities. I was cleaning the inside of the house while husband was raking with the kids. I went out several times and told them they could take a break if they wanted to and brought them water. He never offers them a break and he got aggravated when I did that. Last night he brought home the money to pay them and gave my son $20 and gave daugher $8. She was upset because she worked hard too but was afraid to talk to him about it. I encouraged her repeatedly to go outside (where he was) and talk to him and state her case, but she wouldn't go. Finally, reluctantly, I went out and tried to talk to him and he was furious with me, as I knew he would be. He said "what are you even doing out here talking to me about this??" He said he paid her what she was worth and that a 7-year-old girl can't accomplish a lot. I told him that the point was she had done her best and worked as hard as she was able. He then started fussing at me about the fact that I had gone out and offered them breaks and said that I was always worried about him "working them too hard" and that is why our son is overweight (adding to that a comment about the size of my rear). I told him that overworking an overweight child occasionally is not the answer to him losing weight. It just went on and on until I was very hurt and upset. Then he walked in the house and told my daughter, "Don't worry sweetheart, daddy is going to give you some more money tomorrow." and acted as if he had intended to all along and wasn't upset about anything.
The father has as much rights as the mother to make decisions....sm
about the child, gifts, etc. I know you want what is best for the child but it's really between your daughter and ex-son-in-law to discuss this. Even if your daughter doesn't want this, there's nothing she can do about it other than educate the child about how much candy to eat at once is appropriate.
I tend to believe
that everything is vitamin deficiency. I have had similar symptoms and felt better with magnesium supplementation and Kelp. I also take regular vitamins in addition. You could also be having some side effects from the bcp and Ambien.
I tend to take the attitude that our bodies heal themselves, but I do have to make sure that the food I eat has some nutrition to it, that my bed is facing the right direction, and that I get some fresh air and a little exercise.
I did formerly think everything was mental, but my diet was mostly junk and I smoked two packs a day. The behavior was crazy, but I wasn't, just unhealthy.
I tend to be like your SIL
I tend to be like your SIL and rarely call people. There is something in the back of my mind that thinks I'm bugging them and I can't get past that. It's weird, I know. It also comes from years of working in a business where I had to make small talk with people I don't know and having to answer constantly ringing phones.
Just because I completely get where she is POSSIBLY coming from, I would say to not take it to heart so much and keep on making the effort.
My family made home-made mozzarella,
and it was very good. I was pretty small at the time, so I don't remember the exact process, just that it was done pretty quickly, and a lot of milk was used.
I don't know if you'll save a lot of money making your own cheese. The cost of milk is very high, too, and you need a lot of milk to make cheese.
You know, I don't know, but I would tend to believe the other posters have hit
the nail on the head that it is a comfort zone and perhaps he cannot or will not be without a woman. He is not terribly outgoing, so I do suspect he has esteem issues of his own. In any case, I think I will follow the advice here and wait and see what life brings and not try to settle for less than.
You may be right, I tend to be very negative
So thanks for the honesty, I may just get that DVD.
Tend to agree with you
especially with the way we are being "kept alive" longer these days with more and more medical breakthroughs, medicines, proceduers, etc. It's not uncommon to live into your 80s and 90s any more.
On a slightly different note, I felt middle aged the first time a grocery clerk called me "ma'm". Oh boy did I feel old even though I'm only 48 
Sister! Except I tend to not even
start what I figure I won't finish, LOL. But sleep is one of my (only) 3 hobbies.
I just want to garden and walk my puppies and watch TV and sleep.
Is there any money in putting in gardens for other people when I don't even have a degree in horticulture? Sigh.
For the aircraft, I tend to wonder if (sm)
it was some sort of military craft they were testing and the bird I wonder if may have been an exotic pet someone had that escaped or was abandoned. Either way, it didn't belong where it was.
I tend to agree with you - sm
Also a huge, huge fan for years and then the story line seemed to get more and more ridiculous. I kept watching but would often flip through a magazine at the same time. I was going to quit watching last year, but when I heard it was the final season I figured I would see it through to the end. Yep, they should have ended it when it was still a great show. Glad they put it to bed at last!
I tend to agree
R's parents are not, to my knowledge, alcoholics. However, multiple family members on his mother's side are; those that don't admit to being alcoholics just consider themselves 'hard drinkin' good ol' boys. However, I think R's childhood created a 'perfect storm'. His parents, while not alcoholics, did used to like to drink with friends and many weekends would dump the 2 kids off with the maternal grandparents so they could go drink and carouse. Lesson learned: Booze and buddies are more important than family with a dash of feeling unloved.
Add to that the fact that alcohol helps numb the pain and lets you feel like you're a different person for a while. In addition, since literally everybody he spends time with drinks and 'smokes' as much as he does, he is accepted. After I had called the police, he was shocked because I would do such a thing. In his circle, it is accepted that you get drunk, sometimes you hit each other, and you just accept it because everyone knows you do stupid things drunk and it doesn't mean anything. I probably perpetuated that by not calling in the cops the very first time he laid hands upon me.
I'm not 100% sure I believe in the genetic risk. I tend to lean toward environmental. After his arrest, R went 2 months without drinking. There were several days in there where he would groan about really wanting a Budweiser, but he worked through those days. But then he started spending more and more time with his cousin, and then one day he didn't work through it anymore and twisted off the cap and has been drinking steadily again for the last month.
Although I'm not a big Dr. Phil fan, I heard a quote from him that went, "We generate the reality we think we deserve." I think psychotherapy would help R more than AA, so that he can get back to where he realizes that sober R is not unworthy of anything.
I know, I know, Us Pittsburghers tend to go just a
invite all you over for a party, though -- If you lived nearby you would be welcome.
Anyway -- Great game by two great teams.
And I am psyched!!!!!  I am calm now. A little bit.
Oh what the heck ---  GO PENGUINS!!!
The younger ones tend to have more 'stamina.' If the 2 of you get
ENJOY!
We do tend to remember the image
we had of ourselves from back when we all used to look in the mirror most often (that is, in our teens and early 20s). Men have an even stronger tendency for this than women. I remember Steve Martin being interviewed. He confessed that even though all the men in his family had had their hair turn white at early ages, he had not noticed it was happening to him until he saw himself in a movie.
People do tend to underestimate
the cost of having pets. Their intentions may be good, but it's an education problem. Where I live, if you don't have the dog on flea control and heartworm prevention, a dog just can't be healthy (well, I have heard some raw diet experts say their dogs can be kept free of fleas with their natural techniques, but they are highly educated on the subject). I've got a partial bag of dog food I can't use; wish you were in my area so I could donate it, but you didn't say.
Those places tend to be more expensive sm
Glad you found something that works for you, but that is not the case with everyone. QVC, Catherine's, etc, tend to be more expensive, which is okay for a special occasion outfit once in a great while, but I cannot afford to spend that kind of money on my everyday clothing. Also, if I can't try it on, I usually don't buy it. I have bought clothing from catalogs and feel for me that it is not worth the hassle. Things look one way on TV or in a picture that do not translate well on me. Even in a store, I have picked something up that I thought was really nice and hated it once I tried it on, as I am sure many women have. I am not defending wearing too-small clothes. I am only trying to come up with a reason for someone doing so. You wouldn't catch me dead out of the house in something too small.
wow that's SO true-we tend to the elder parent who....
at least some of us will make/made that choice - I certainly did.....well, the abusive one died many years prior to the nonabusive parent (the Lord does have one strange sense of humor I thought back then *lol*) and took care of the nonabusive parent for 10 years until their demise.
Children are forgiving, but if a parent NEVER says *I'm sorry* or *I was wrong* when, indeed, they are/were wrong, well I do not believe children/offspring forget.
just my 3 cents worth......
Men do tend to die younger, so it makes sense
to find a younger one. Mine is 4 years older, and he is aging faster because he hasn't taken care of himself. High school and college sports can take a heavy toll on a man.
I find they tend to be polite and reserved.
It makes me feel like the rest of us must seem loud, nosy and obnoxious to them, but then again I tend to be paranoid when people are too quiet, LOL.
Were there Herb gardens to tend to in jail? LOL. nm
x
well the word "hijacked" does tend to put one on the defensive
x
As women, I think we all tend to have issues with our MILs...
No one is ever good enough for their sons, kind of thing--lol
Guys tend to pack light, and
probably would be embarrassed by something you were calling a hope chest. Nothing wrong with having a bin with practical essentials for them to take with them, but if it goes beyond what they can see they'll need immediately when they venture out on their own, they might leave it behind. And if it is girly or can't take a beating or isn't flexible about going from DW to MW to oven, it's not going to get used IMO.
Computer users tend to forget to blink.
When we don't blink, visual acuity decreases. Get some good wetting eye drops without preservatives and keep them at your desk. Two recommended brands are Systane by Alcon and Refresh Liquigel by Allergan (these are thicker).
These are recommended by my eye doctor who did my LASIK and are not cheap.
Try to get in a habit of blinking more.
Hope these tips help you.
They like heat. Will tend to find warm place to
xx
Then they can get right back on their tires and rafts and float on back to Cuba! nm
nm
Back-to-back black swans that look like (sm)
a giant moustache. My MIL painted it for us and put our last name on it and my DH nailed it to an outside storage room door. It looks ridiculous, and when the kids have other kids over they always ask why we have a giant moustache on our door!
Hayseed was back a few weeks back
But we haven't heard from her since. I miss her too. I hope she's doing okay.
For some items you could buy men's, they tend to be longer with longer sleeves. NM
x
esl just made my day
 I just had the best ESL dictator! He spelled almost every word he had trouble pronouncing and spelled it accurately, spoke slowly and ended the report with, "Thank you so much and have a nice day." If only they could all be so easy! 
None of this is made up
I don't care if you think I'm weird. My kids and family didn't think it was weird and your opinion doesn't mean anything to me, anyway. Apparently there are people here with an opinion because they have posted so many - I don't care if ya'll want to keep it going. Be my guest.
LOL! You just made my day! :)..nm
/
Made too much $$$$, had to pay it all
Gosh, that tuition came around often and so did all the books I had to buy, all out of pocket because back then I made more than I should have (we also had a home business that cleared half a million the first year) but I would have loved not to pay out of pocket, I am really cheap on some things, my pockets for example.
ha, ha...that just made me think...take a lap
x
that made me think a bit.
someone who is less educated than yourself?
No
someone of a different race?
Yes
someone whose parent's are divorced?
No
someone who has bad credit or alot of bad debt?
No
someone who is overweight or obese?
No
someone who affliates or supports a different political party than yourself?
yes
someone who is rude to customer service staff?
No, if he's rude to everyone.
someone who talks a longtime on their cell phone when you are eating?
No
someone who enjoys a different genre of music?
Yes
someone who does not enjoy the same leisure activities as yourself?
yes
someone who is a very picky eater or someone who is a vegeterian/vegan and you are not?
Yes
someone who prefers to spend leisure time alone or with friends (without you)?
yes
OMG, are you serious? You made my day!..nm
nm
One of the cutest I made...sm
My kids are too old now but I use to make all their costumes and usually tried to match the up even though they are 5 years apart. My favorite was a scarecrow and a crow. Scarecrow costume is fairly easy with overalls, straw hat and rafia (My daughter, older) and my son was the crow, using a long sleeve black leotard and orange tights (had to dye some), sewed full head gear (including beak) and tail, feet to cover top of shoes out of felt. They won their school contest that year.
That made my day, I loved it !!...nm
x
Thanks, you both made me feel better about it...sm
My intuition is definitely telling me something is off in the story. I try not to be too quick to judge but can't compromise the safety of my kids.
It bothers me a lot when stuff like this comes up, reminds how difficult the world is these days. I love technology, movies, music, the internet, etc., as much as the next guy, but it sure raises a lot of issues with your kids that weren't there when we grew up. Whatever happened to the days when kids made doll houses, sleds, and clubhouses out of cardboard boxes and the first thing you did after school was change into play clothes to race to the house with the best swingset or grab a snack to watch the Brady Bunch or the Monkeys.
By then, they usually know, and if not, will be made fun of by other kids.
x
For those of you who believe this rule had to be made
because of those with medical problems - you are very naive. We are know there are exceptions to all rules - this has obviously become a huge problem with obnoxious children.
Ok, well how would you feel if you made...
your daugther get this vaccine and then 10-20 years down the line she dies from some crazy side effect?!! Then you would have to live with the fact that YOU COULD HAVE prevented her death by just not making her get the shot!! Or what if one of the long-term side effects is sterilization or something else that is just awful, how would you feel then knowing you could have prevented it?! I absolutely do NOT believe in letting my little girl be a guinea pig so some politicians and drug company can become rich! No way is my daughter getting this until they have LONG-TERM studies that it's safe for her!
i think iit was all made in fun, and besides if Simon did not like him
he would not be hosting the show.
I made such a big mistake
I got in touch with someone I went out with once, just to say hello. Now he won't leave me alone. I've told him I don't want to see him, that I was just saying hi, and he won't believe me. He acts like we're going to have a relationship and live happily ever after. He called me like 4 times before I ever got home from work, even though I told him what time I would be home. These were weird calls. One of them sounded like somebody else, not him at all.
He's not a whacked out kid, or on drugs (at least not that I know of), he's in his 40's and is a seemingly responsible single parent.
He's called a couple of times, ranting at me about me not answering the phone. He's called a couple of times and hung up. He just won't stop. I had to take my phone off the hook.
I wrote him an email telling him to leave me alone. Maybe he hasn't checked his email tonight, I don't know.
Anyway, this guy is seriously obsessive. He wasn't like this when I knew him before, although he did react rather badly when I broke it off.
I think I'm dealing with a psycho here! I never really knew him very well before, and now I'm hoping I can get out of it without having to get the police involved.
|
