Accepted for who we are and not for what people perceive us to be. sm
Posted By: Y-me on 2007-09-24
In Reply to: Deep down inside what we all really want is to be......... - Finish This With Just One Word
Looking at most of my relationships now that are bitter or no more, this seems to be the case. My 2 SILs hate me with everything in their being and I've never been anything but myself around them. This is a very hard pill to swallow. To not be accepted for who you are.
Thank God I found Joyce Meyer. She's ON MY SIDE! I love it!
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I could not be accepted by MIL
as she died before we married but I wish I had known her- if she was anything like the man she raised, I would have loved her as much as I love her son. I see the rest of his family here and there but everyone is out of town but all on good terms.
Definitely accepted
I love my in-laws. My husband is one of 10 (some step) and we all get along really well. I don't have a sister, so my sister-in-law and I are very close and I consider her my sister. I don't know what I'd do if they didn't like me. I can't imagine being married to someone and not being able to get along with their family.
Accepted - but my MIL drives
So I keep my distance. She's a martyr at times and very gossipy so you have to watch what you say around her. SIL takes advantage of her all the time. I try to remain cordial and let DH worry and deal with her.
Totally accepted
I was totally accepted. My MIL is one of my best friends, even after the divorce. Still talk with the brothers and wifes although not as much as before but I still feel accepted but now because I am me and not his wife. So there are nice in-laws out there. Can also say that my family has always accepted spouses into the family, may not be our best friends but have always been accepted and treated well. My brother sure put this to the test with his six wives but we liked all of them and probably more than him. Still in contact with several as he had children and my mother when she was alive never lost contact with any of the grandchildren or even step-grandchildren when it came to birthdays, Christmas or whatever when there was a divorce. Anyway, there are good in-laws or ex in-laws out there. Patti
Totally accepted
My FIL was a better father to me than my own dad. My MIL said she learned more about her son's life from me than she ever did from him (that's true).
And after my MIL passed away, my FIL remarried a few years later, and I was fortunate enough to get another SUPER MIL who has been not only my friend but the best grandmother I could ever ask for to my son.
Am I lucky, or what? I feel very, very blessed.
Absolutely accepted!
I love my in-laws! They're really great. My husband wasn't very close with his family growing up, but is now that I love being around his family. He's also close with my family, so we are very lucky to have both sides of our family to be friends with and we love having everyone over for bbq's during the summer. Then again, I'm the kind of person that gets along with everyone and I like to think that everyone has at least some good in them and I think this definitely helps with being accepted into other peoples' families.
Totally accepted
I was immediately accepted by everyone in his family, and they all loved me right off. His mother is constantly buying me things, even though I don't exactly like all of the things that she gets me!
Accepted in the family that you married into?
How many people are REALLY accepted into the family that they married into? I don't just mean the EXTREME cases of, "You STOLE my son, you brazen hussy!" but the more subtle stuff too.
Totally accepted by DH's fam but not by my own family
Hubbies mom, sis and brothers make myself, our child and my children from a previous marriage feel so comfortable (I will not bring up their jealous spiteful wives) however my own mother, father, brother and sister make myself, DH and our kids feel like outsiders.
Your apology is accepted, Ella...sm
I've never had a person apologize on here to me. :)
I was totally accepted by my 1st husband's family but
when I married my second husband, I was never accepted by his mother. Of course, she didn't even like my husband. The rest of his family accepted me and that was all that mattered.
The funny thing is...when she was dying, she asked me to forgive her for all the nasty things she did to me and of course, I did. It wasn't her fault she was like that. Life made her that way.
Between the 2 MIL's, I'd take the first hubby's mother any time. We spoke and visited even after the divorce, even invited them to parties we (2nd husband and I) because he liked them too. . . and they always came. I miss them.
But wait! Act now and I will throw in one for free! Check or M.O. accepted. nm
s
You don't need a proposal; you've already accepted. Go to a jeweler and pick one out together
s
But this is not a school-wide accepted teaching practice, it is individual (nm)
x
you can give the people the facts, but the decision making process should be left to the people
This is what our country is founded on FREEDOM OF CHOICE! I'm laughing already; you are just as mortal as the rest of us, and don' even attempt to that you've never done anything in your lifetime that was unsafe or unhealthy. NOT gonna buy it.
it is wonderful to see how many people have such strong opinions about people in debt.
I thought that the purpose of this board was to be able to post without being judged unfairly or have somebody tell you how wonderful their personal life is, and therefore you are causing their life to be less wonderful with your irresponsibility. Well, the saying "walk a mile in my shoes" is a good one in this case. Since you have no personal information about the person you are lambasting because they are looking for information on their debt, you can feel superior. Had you had personal information about them, you might act in a more human manner. Consider fighting cancer for 4 years, working and being debilitated while you do, suffering the effects of chemo, going into debt to maintain your home for your children and looking for a way out of debt SHOULD YOU EVEN LIVE THROUGH THIS!! Thank you for the kind comments. To the judgmental people I say please take a step back before you judge. You do not know who you are talking to and if you knew the personal information maybe your comments would be kinder.
I get frustrated by the double standard they use when judging people. They let certain people go sa
What do you think about the voting process?
People who go around calling other people "low class"
have their own issues in life. Ignore them. Nothing like a misplaced superiority complex to make a person feel good about themselves. Like they've never done anything gauche or made a faux pas. It must be nice for them to be so perfect and live in a glass house.
For that matter, you probably saved your piggy's life by popping that mondo zit! It could have gotten infected or something.... (yes, I have a zit popping fixation myself, but you were really descriptive on that pig zit. gag LOL)
Man, you would have appreciated the time one of my relative's popped a HUGE cyst on her face. I was standing right next to her at the time and leaned back because I knew it was going to blow. It did! Big time! All over the wall, mirror and light fixture. I'm still disgusted by the thought of it 10 years later. LOL In a revering kind of way...
some people did, some people didn't. It's their choice.
x
If this helps...I know people who know people (sm)
who can make people disappear.
Not really--I'd be lyin' if I said I never thought such things though! ;-)
IME, people don't feel sorry for fat people either
They actually have less sympathy than they do for people who have substance abuse, IME.
At any rate, I do feel sorry for Britney but the safety of her children should be everyone's first priority, then her safety. It would seem to me that all these hangers-on she has are jeopardizing that safety. It's all just very sad.
Some people just look at me
like I am crazy. You should see the looks I get when she rides on my shoulder in the car. Most people associate rats with dirty animals, etc. They are just like a hamster, only very smart animals. Plus they don't bite like hamsters or try and get away from you. They want to be around you. They are very loyal and love attention. She's my baby.
Unfortunately, she has a cyst growing under her arm now though. She is getting old, and I know her time is coming. :(
OMG! You people are bad, bad, bad!!! I'm going to
!
For me, over 25 people to buy for......
including mine and my husband's immediate families we see separately Christmas eve and Christmas day. We also visit grandparents, aunts, cousins, etc. a week later. We don't have kids yet so still spend a few hundred on each other. It is probably closer to 1500 combined for us.
What about NJ? People here act like
they're the best beaches in the world and I can assure you they are NOT. LBI is the cute nickname now given to Long Beach Island which is a dump as are most NJ beaches and everyone acts like it's the Hamptons or something. Been to NC outer banks and loved it. No comparison.
I think there need to be more people...
in the world like you! You are doing a wonderful thing and are a shining example to your children!
Pet (Dog in particular) people -
I have a Lab/Pit mix, probably 8 or 9 years old, who has a terrible problem with itching and scratching all over. I am hoping someone on this site has a solution for us.
I will tell you what we have tried that has not worked.
Benadryl has not worked. Seemed to help initially but stopped it and she shows no change.
Changing her food has not worked. Have tried all kinds of food, wheat free, have not helped.
Adding oil to her food, 1-2 tablespoons of olive oil twice a day, has not helped. Seemed to help initially but she went back to scratching.
Getting her groomed with dry skin shampoo/conditioner has not helped.
What DID help was steroid injection and prednisone pills on a tapering dose. But once the dose was tapered down, she started scratching some. I dont want her on steroids indefinitely. PLUS, the steroids made her very very aggressive and being part pitbull, that was not a good thing.
When it gets to the point that she and I are both waking up multiple times during the night, I have to go back to steroids. Before I do that, I wonder if anyone reading this has another remedy we could try before going to steroid route.
We also have a cat and I am beginning to think she may be allergic to the cat. Do you think this is possible? My vet technician told me it is possible but it would involve costly allergy testing and injections if it proves positive. Would like opinions from others before I take her for allergy testing.
Any info anyone could provide would sure be appreciated, not only by me but by my best friend who is suffering with this.
Thank you!
um, a lot of people don't go to the, uh, gym.
nm
I know 5 people who have had this...sm
1 has kept the weight they lost off.
2 had major complications after the surgery and 1 almost died - he was healthy before surgery.
4 lost weight but have regained most if not all of it. You can restretch the stomach back out by eating too much.
I like those too - I know a lot of people don't :-)
x
Yes, but LL should have people to look out for her
be watched 24/7, but LL could be and should be. She should be protected and anyone with any interest in this girl, either for financial or other, such as her mother, should be helping her better than this.
IMO there is no excuse for this. Maybe I am being harsh, but give me a break already with these celebs.
Just like with people
Recovering from surgery (procedures done with anesthesia) when they're older is harder for them, and you have to be super careful that they don't have any conditions that could be worsened by the medications. Please try everything you can before getting them declawed. I'm lucky, my cats love their scratch posts, but they also love picking at the carpet. I just buy rugs and stick them all over the place!
Those people should have given you (sm)
thank you notes BUT, when you give you have to give with a free and willing heart and not expect anything in return - even a thank you - because you will only get bitter waiting. Only give when you really want to and feel the need to and you will feel better about it I think.
re: people
Just me,
The Bible says in Jeremiah 17:9:
"The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; Who can know it?"
It is our sin nature to commit sin and we're all born with it. I don't know what the percentage of sexual sin is, but I do know that it is getting more and more prevalent and has been around since bible days because we are all born sinners and we all need Jesus to save us. That doesn't mean that after we accept Jesus we stop sinning, but are more likely to be faithful when we know the Lord.
God bless!
Jan
Pod people.
It's the only explanation. How can you not talk to people in an environment like that?!
This really is about the right age when most people do this (sm)
I was 18 and that was 20 years ago. You cannot make her not do it. I would strongly focus right now on teaching her all the possible STDs - I mean seriously teaching her - because I got herpes from oral sex when I was 21 and did not even know you could get it that way. Just sit down with her and say, "well you have decided to do this and I don't agree with it, BUT since you are, let's look up every possible bad thing that can happen" and make sure she is extremely well informed. Even find scary pictures of HPV and look up hep B and hep C and herpes and every STD you can think of. At least then she probably will not be promiscuous and will be choosy and careful about who she is with.
and once again, people come in here and can....n/m
Why do people have to
make reference to a person other than "did that nice woman smile at you?"??? If she had been obese instead, would they have said..."Did that fat lady smile at you?" Just annoys me how insensitive people can be and how they can be quick to label a person without even knowing anything about them.
I would have been offended myself in this situation. HOW RUDE!
i know this will ^&*()$% people off
I personally would never have an abortion, but think of all the people who were aborted instead of being born. Maybe there is another reason that they were aborted and that society is better off as a whole because of it.
Yep. People just don't think - nm
nm
I know some people that took their son's
room away. He was about 13 and they had only been living in their new house a few months. His bedroom was in the basement with the rest of the family on the second floor. He loved his room soooo much. This was not really a bad kid, just wouldn't do homework, chores, picked on his sister, really just immature. They made him move into his little brother's room. His LB was 4 so he obviously loved having big bro for a roommate. Straightened him out rather quickly.
IMO, most people won't say anything
so i would suggest you definitely keep your eyes and ears open. chances are, being it was brought to your attention, there may be something to it.
Depending upon the gravity of it all, you may want to do some snooping, and/or check financial records and such. Whatever you do, 'protect yourself at all times',ie, cover your bases. Trust is so important with a spouse, but not a blind trust.
Depending upon other factors, you may or may not confront your spouse, but likely not. There, you lose the element of surprise, and if something is up, the coverup will be more elaborate and harder to penetrate.
two people
if at all possible, but I don't have any help and rarely do I need to bathe them, only time has been when they had a brief flea outbreak. But if you have no help, just hold by the ruff of the back of the neck and since mine are adults, I let there back feet touch the ground so as not to hold them there by their full weight and do the best I can with washing them with one hand. I do it in the bathtub with a sprayer I have attached to my shower head.
For people our age I think
hair should not as long as Meredith's, just turned to see her because I really do not want her show that often. No matter how nice the color, the shine, etc. I think keeping any longer only ages a person. I try to keep mine ear length, any longer only bothers me.
I think too many people....
automatically think spanking is abuse because they have become brainwashed by society, government, etc. Adults CAN draw the line and I don't think there are too many that "beat" their kids. I was also spanked as a child, never beat, and raised my kids spanking them ONLY if needed. I NEVER smacked them across the face as that is humuliating to the child and my point was never to humuliate my kids but to instill what is accepted and not accepted.
My sister-in-law raised her kids on timeout and the never ending "talks". Five minutes later they were doing the exact same thing they were timed out for. Her kids are now teenagers. They are smart mouthed, have no respect for people, she is unable to control them which in turn she lets them do what they want, bribes them to "behave", etc. They come from a loving, good home but I see nothing but trouble in the future for them as they have no boundries of what and what is not accepted.
My kids were raised getting a spank or two on the behind with a firm no (never a beating or screaming at them). They have turned into respectful, caring, responsible adults with no side affects from the spanking. I ask them to do something and they do it without back talk. They call their elders Mr or Mrs. They turned out to be well adjusted, happy kids with many friends as it was instilled into them to respect people as they would like to be respected.
Unfortunately, society and the government, etc., has gotten involved with raising OUR kids. They need to step back and worry about their own kids. I for one do not worry when my kids are out at night, they are not driving and drinking, they are not stealing, not doing drugs, etc. They are not perfect and can be a pain in the a** at times, but I know I raised them right and I raised them as I see fit - not how society would want me to raise them.
I do not spank them anymore as there is no need to. That stopped at 8 or 9 years old - they knew what was right and wrong by that time. If they do something I do not like, I now talk with them. There are times that does not work and then I take away privileges such as driving, etc.
Too many people confuse beating and spanking - spanking is not beating!!
People have to eat, so it
is easy to get addicted to food. Smoking, on the other hand, is a ridiculous act of a person who wanted to rebel when they were young and got caught by addiction.
people don't get it...
The reason he probably has the bible on his desk it to have an "open" door for someone. Think about it. If someone is reading a book on say, giraffes, and your curious about giraffes, maybe after awhile you'll say "hey, can you tell me about giraffes?"
I understand now adays there are a lot of "pushy" Christians, and there are also people who are Sunday Christians, and there are Christians who don't practice what they preach. But there are also good, honest, caring Christians who really do want to help you find Jesus and save your soul from he-ll. yes, he-ll. It's real btw.
I'm not trying to start an arguement, but don't condemn this man that you have never met of "trying to make a statement" or "being a pushy Christian." Maybe that bible is on his desk so that one day a co-worker, student, friend, etc will say "what's that thing all about anyways?"
The worst thing this country ever did was take Christianity out of schools. Obviously when we have third graders plotting to kill teachers, we have done something very, very wrong.
Have you ever met one of those people...
who just drive you crazy? You know the type where anything that comes out of their mouth is negative, nothing is ever new and they have something bad to say about EVERYTHING? Had to deal with one this weekend and just wanted to scream!
I can't believe you people sm
This was a significant bite, and nothing was done about it.
Gah...some people...
My ex-SIL used to say all the danged time that she was pregnant, once with twins, then a single, oops...twins again, on and on. Inevitably she'd always end up *miscarrying* for one reason or another! For this situation, however, I wouldn't believe it til I see it...some people just really get on my nerves with their attention-seeking behavior...I think they need therapy.
Do please let us know when she stars on Jerry Springer, this sounds right up his alley!
There are people
who view their pet(s) as children because it is all they have. Our dogs have always been a big part of our family and are viewed as one of our children. Dog aggression/people aggression, it is all the same. Aggression is aggression and can easily be turned toward both human and animal given the right situation. You cannot possibly predict what will happen. It could be that one day your dog decides not to listen to you when in an aggressive state and not come back when called. Our Pitbull was very obedient, did not even need a leash (hah in hindsight), although was never off one out in public except at the ranch. She was one of the best behaved, most obedient dog at the ranch except for the Border Collie mix she nearly killed, who was trained for herding and was amazing at it. You know the potential is there for your dog to do serious damage and I hope you are never put in the position we were. It happens so fast, in the blink of any eye many lives are affected and changed forever.
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