Oh boy

my mind screams RUN, while my heart is in my throat. And I haven't even done anything wrong...

You just described how I felt for 4.5 years at an insurance agency.  To describe how truly toxic the atmosphere was would take more time than anyone has.  I spent as long as I did there for a number of reasons, denial being the first one.  I was also paid extraordinarily well and that was hard to think about giving up.  I was suicidal at one point, I gained 50 pounds which I still haven't managed to take off.  The owner ended up selling the agency which forced my hand into leaving.  I didn't leave before then because I just didn't think I had any options.  I didn't think I knew how to do anything else and certainly nothing that would pay me as much as I was making without a college degree of some sort.  The day he told us he was selling the agency and in his words throwing us under the bus, was the day I signed up for an online MT course and the rest is history.  I was scared poop-less at the time, but now I realize he did me a favor in handling it like he did.  I stopped caring what he would think of me when I left and I stopped caring that he would trash talk me when I left - which indeed he did.

I got long winded. Sorry.  This is a bad deal no matter what, but if it's affecting your health at all, get out now before you have a lot of time invested in them.   I work for a smaller company part time that sometimes runs out of work because it's a clinic account.  I start work full time for Probity this Saturday. Now I don't know anything yet about the work, but the platform looks good so far.  The people I have dealt with thus far have been extraordinarily professional and kind.  I have lots of e mails coming in every day saying we have lots of work if anyone wants to do more hours.  They have benefits, PTO, etc.  You might try talking to them if you want a FT employee status position.

Good luck with your decision making!

• Unsure, need reality check - new-at-this job-but notMTing
  • I say follow your instincts. - Happy MT Robin
    • Thanks for the reality check, Happy MT - newatthisjobetc.
      • Oh boy - Happy MT Robin
      • I agree. This is a run away fast situation. - ndmt
        • What you describe here fits my situation to a T - newatthisjobnotmt
          • Trust your feelings. Too many good places (sm) - sm
            • A great company - blackswan

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